I VOTE WE SKIP THE AUTHOR'S NOTE BECAUSE SO I CAN FINISH THIS CHAPPIE QUICKIE AND WATCHIE KATEKYOIE.

..woah, baby talk much?

NO I don't own Hibari. No I don't want to.

WAIT. Let me emphasize a few things:

Hibari is sleeping in Tsuna's bed. Tsuna, is sleeping SOMEWHERE ELSE.

I do NOT support D18. Mainly because I tend to be slightly overprotective over people with the same birthdate as me. Dino, not Hibari.

…um, Gokudera and Tsuna are FRIENDS, and Gokudera is the right-hand man. That means he's SUPPOSED to protect Tsuna with his OWN BODY, and not because "Oh I lubs my juudaime to bits"

Okay, now with the above points in mind, go ahead. Read. Enjoy. Savour it.

o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

"…well, aren't you going to say hello to your tutor?"

"…I didn't ask for your company you weak herbivore."

"Aw. I'm hurt. C'mon, Kyouya, don't be so mean!"

"…"

Hibari was getting…slightly better, despite the horrid events that happened last chapter. He was now sitting upright in Tsuna's bed, and only half mummified. He could move his arms…slightly. He still couldn't fight properly, unless you counted a gentle poke in the tummy a vicious attack, which was the most Hibari could really manage right now.

It. Was. DISGRACEFUL.

And Hibari was beginning to think that Dino was smiling at him, because he was mocking him.

"…are you done with your stupid herbivore hospitality visit? Can you go now?"

"I just got here! What kind of tutor would I be if I didn't at least stay a while?"

"The best kind."

Dino pouted, which was cute, but it sickened Hibari to the deepest darkest caverns of his soul. For goodness sakes this guy was like, what, twenty-two? And here he was, acting like a 5 year old.

Well, Dino might have argued that it was only a 16 year difference, which he did, two weeks ago. And Hibari had rolled his eyes, whacked Dino, and said it wasn't 16, it was "17 you stupid herbivore who can't count." And by then Dino and Hibari were fighting again and it turned out Dino had blocked that whack to the face.

"Aaaaanyway, Kyouya! I brought…GINSENG SOUP!"

"…what."

"It's GOOD FOR YOU!"

"…what."

"Now now, Kyouya. It ain't good manners to go 'what' when someone gives you something nice! Now drink up!"

Dino opened a thermos flask that he had brought with him. The smell wafted to Hibari's nose, and…okay he had to confess it smelled pretty okay but no way was he going to admit THAT to a weak herbivore.

"…"

"I made it myself! So I'll be REALLY HURT if you don't drink it!"

Okay. All the MORE Hibari was NOT touching that stuff.

Besides, it didn't have meat in it. Carnivores don't DO…non-meat.

Even if their tutor who acted 17 years younger than he really was would get 'REALLY HURT' if he didn't.

"…"

"…Kyouya."

Hibari death-glared at his tutor.

Dino looked sternly back, like a mother.

Oh my goodness, Dino is so…(insert appropriate word to describe person who changes mental age in seconds)

"Don't make me force feed you."

Okay, Hibari nearly gasped at that.

The thing about Hibari Kyouya is that the only time "Hibari" and "gasped" appear in the same time, is when the word "Doesn't" is between them.

So I guess if you want to go by that rule the above sentence is not logical.

But then, Dino force feeding Hibari ginseng soup with Hibari half-mummified on Tsuna's bed is NOT logical.

But back to the story.

To begin with, one of the reasons that Hibari only noticed that this point of time was that…even if he WAS willing to drink that soup, he couldn't.

Reminder: Hibari is half-mummified.

And it just so happened that Dino just realized this too.

"Oh no, Kyouya. I didn't realize! Alright, I shall be a nice tutor and feed you, whether you like it or not!"

"…No."

Dino smiled evilly. "Yes, Kyouya. Now open wide…"

oo0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

Tsuna, Gokudera and Yamamoto were enjoying mango pudding that Nana made with a new recipe she found in the newspaper.

"It's a pity Hibari-san can't eat this delicious pudding!" commented Yamamoto cheerfully. If you didn't know he was such an idiot, you might think he was trying to rub it in.

"Yeah. Well, Dino-san is upstairs with Hibari-san right now, and it looked like Dino-san brought some food!" Tsuna said.

Gokudera said nothing. He just thought he heard a thump.

o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

"I…SAID…NO!!!"

"STOP…(ow!) THAT KYOUYA! IT'S FOR YOUR…(hey that HURT!) …OWN…GOOD!"

"NO!"

"…OW!"

"RARRRRRR!!!"

"Clink!"

"GAG CHOKE SPTHPTRHSTPRSTHHTTHTHHHHHHH!!!"

"There. Wasn't that nice?"

"…die, herbivore."

"…woah oh."

"RARRRRR!!!"

"clink! BANG!"

"HOWWWW…!"

"STUPID HERBIVO…..OWWWWWWW!!!"

"KYOUYA!"

o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

Gokudera looked up at the ceiling again.

…did that light fixture just swing again?

Tsuna looked at his friend. "What's wrong?"

"It…it's nothing, Juudaime. I just wonder what Dino's doing…they sure are making a lot of noise…"

Yamamoto spewed out the spoonful of mango pudding he had in his mouth.

Damn, why did he have to go read that M-rated yaoi fic that his baseball-mate told him to try reading?

o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

"RARRRRRRR!!!"

The door of Tsuna's room burst open (yes, his door bursts a lot…) and there was a flurry of bandages, blonde hair, black hair, whips, tonfas, and the faintest tinge of ginseng.

"KYOUYA STOP BEING SO CHILDISH!"

"YOU'RE THE CHILDISH ONE, HERBIVORE! I'LL BITE YOU TO DEATH!"

"YOU CAN'T EAT MEAT EXCEPT FISH AND…"

"SHUT UP YOU STUPID HERBIVORE!!!'

The two boys who were now acting…one quarter their age were now rolling down the stairs in a big dust ball of fighting, biting, screaming, growling, and the odd tinge of ginseng.

"What the…" Gokudera started, standing out of his chair, wielding dynamite to protect his Juudaime.

Tsuna squealed "HIEEE! HIBARI-SAN! DINO-SAN!"

"…" Yamamoto turned slightly pale, then laughed.

Hibari and Dino rolled apart, Hibari recovering first, bandages ripped and bloodied. Dino recovered swiftly after rolling aside, holding a battered looking thermos flask and a broken spoon.

Hibari stood up, wiped his mouth, and said "Don't ever try that again, you herbivore."

And then promptly did a perfect imitation of a falling tree.

Tsuna, Gokudera, and Dino just stared. Yamamoto just cracked up laughing.

And Nana, who just came in, sighed. "I don't think he'll be ready to get out of bed just yet…"

o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

Hibari was now three-quarters mummified, and Gokudera had been assigned to feed the biting patient his daily dose of medicine and vegetable pork-rib soup. Gokudera left the room, muttering and swearing in Italian, Japanese and English under his breath, while Tsuna rushed with bandages and antiseptic. He didn't think Hibari's bites were septic or he was rabid, but then, you could never be too careful.

Back in Tsuna's room, Hibari was wallowing in self-pity. Silently, of course. He wouldn't have wanted anyone to know that the great Hibari Kyouya was in self-pity.

He hated the diet, he hated the confinement, but worse of all, he hated the separation from Hibird.

But then, he knew deep in his heart, that it might have been for the better.

He was comforting himself in the thought that he was protecting Hibird by letting Tsuna keep him outside, when Yamamoto strolled in, Hibird on finger.

"Yo, Hibari-san!"

"…what do you want, stupid herbivore."

"I thought you might be bored, so I brought your little bird friend in! Say hello, Hibird!"

"Hibari hibari!"

And now, Yamamoto understood why Tsuna had said "Don't let Hibari near Hibird."

o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

"…Hibird STILL hasn't moved?"

"I don't blame him. I mean, your owner suddenly launches himself at you, and tries to eat you. How can you NOT be in shock?"

"Quick, try putting his head over the toilet bowl and flushing again! Or..or try singing the Namimori school song! Maybe that works!"

"uh…uh…me?!"

"C'mon, Juudaime! You can SING!"

o0o0o0oo0oo0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

And THAT'S where Hibird was.

And that's why Hibari and hibird must be separated.

Now you shall happily click on that review button, and expect the next update to be in a week or so.