Hidan had been watching the green thing for a while. When Kisame had told him about the guy a few years ago he thought it was another one of his fish tales – great entertainment, very little truth. Even after Madara had him dug up and put back together and he saw it for himself, he thought Jashin-sama was giving him a punitive vision of doom. There could be no other reason for him to see a fully grown man in green spandex, orange leg warmers, and a bowl cut that had to have been created with scissors of doom.
Hidan's fear grew as he continued to see not just one, but two of the green things as he went about the village. He wasn't allowed to kill anyone in the village and Madara had limited the amount of missions he could take so he was limited to self sacrifice to show his devotion. He began stabbing himself twice a day and added self-flagellation and volunteering at the Academy to his routine. No amount of pikes to the gut could come close to the wrath of that scar faced sensei and the minions of miniature people at his command.
Regardless of how much he punished himself and bled for his religion, he still continued to see the green things. The little one had even moved next door to his apartment. Hidan was truly afraid that the sacrifices he'd made while trapped in that hole were truly unworthy of Jashin-sama. He'd bitten his tongue numerously as well as whatever body parts had landed nearby. He'd sacrificed 9 of every 10 worms, bugs and moles that crossed his path and prayed heavily before eating the tenth. Even still such devotion was unworthy. Hidan was in the midst of performing the ultimate self sacrifice by setting himself on fire until he heard a voice so loud and commanding it could only be a message from Jashin-sama herself.
"I will climb the Hokage Monument using only my chin and teeth if Lee is wasting his youthful apartment with inadequate furnishings!"
"Youth? Youth? Youth!" Hidan screamed at his epiphany. He quickly called up a small water jutsu to put out the flames before running out of his door and directly into the big green thing. "Are you interesting in everlasting youth? The kind in which every damn day is a springtime of rejuvenation overflowing with blessings so long as we passionately and faithfully give our blood, sweat, tears, pain and the lives of our motherfucking enemies to prove our worthiness in the name of our raging goddess Jashin?"
"Everlasting youth?" A field of flowers materialized as the sun dropped low in the sky.
"A never ending springtime?" The sky changed from the clear blue of noon to the muted colors of sunset.
"A challenge full of blood, sweat and manly tears to prove our worthiness?" A rainbow appeared uniting the clouds.
"How could I say no, my friend?" Tiny sparkles that could only be the remnants of sunbeams began flashing around the man's large and unnaturally white teeth and reflecting off what Hidan now speculated was actually modified bowling ball shellacked to look like hair.
At this response, Hidan realized the big green thing whose outburst had summoned the sunset as well as the little green thing that was nodding in agreement and spewing copious amounts of tears had actually been sent by Jashin-sama to be his disciples.
"Hell fucking yeah!" Hidan screamed as he launched himself from the fifth floor landing. "I should have realized it sooner. Anybody wearing those outfits and hair cuts are hardcore into self punishment!"