A/n: Sorry for the delays lately.... these in between chapters although necessary are difficult to write and I have to finish writing this mini musical that I'm working on (because we perform in OCTOBER ) AND one of my friends loaned me a copy of The Host... yeah... that wasn't distracting at all!

Thank you all so much for your reviews.

Twilight belongs to Stephanie Meyer, I am not nearly that cool.

Okay, this chapter sucked until.... I stumbled upon a piece of music, Jason Isbell's In a Razor Town kind of pulled this chapter from the back of my mind and made it much better than the whinny Edward wants to go fight drivel that it threatened to turn into. Seriously, go pull it up on YouTube while you read.

Jason Isbell, In a Razor Town

Jason Isbell, When the Well Runs Dry


The sun was never going to set. I watched it hover in the sky and willed it to drop more slowly to the horizon. The faster it went, the faster I could make Bella safe. It was odd that those words came to mind because this was nothing like Phoenix. The situation was different. I didn't have time then and here at the top of this hill I had what seemed like an eternity. It was merely a few hours but those few hours stretched on like years. I had been able to run to her before but this plan dictated that I wait and so I waited.

Alice watched the sun stalled in the sky along with me. She continued to occupy her mind by watching Jasper and Bella. She opted to focus on the very near future and was able to watch their conversation almost as it happened. Her estimate was that we were only a few seconds ahead. I cling to her mind as my sanity. Bella was safe with Jasper; he wouldn't allow any harm to come to her and I knew that. I was still pacing though because I wanted to be down there.

"Edward?" Alice cut off her vision momentarily.

"Yeah." I stopped moving and stared at the dirt path that I'd worn into the ground. I expected more bad news.

Bella is about to stop editing her relationship with Jacob. She knows that we're listening. I don't know if you really want that kind of information but if you do... Alice trailed off staring at her cold stone hands.

"She knows that you're watching?" I verified.

"Yeah." She whispered twisting a piece of grass in her fingers.

Jasper had brought up Phoenix with Bella and warned her not to try anything like that again. She promised him that she wouldn't but I didn't feel like she really meant it. If Bella could find a way to protect everyone else with that frail little body of hers, then she would do it regardless of any promise that she'd made. I suddenly had a very strong desire to wrap her in bubble wrap and lock her away someplace safe.

Do you want to hear it? Alice persisted.

I nodded my head and she plunged us back into the yellowed dusty office.

"I don't blame Edward because I blame myself and that has everything to do with Jacob Black." Bella gave a large heavy sigh. Her shoulders shook slightly and it made my heart burn with an ache that I could only relieve by going to her but I couldn't. I was hopeless and worthless on the top of this hill. I kicked a rock.

"What did you do to Jacob Bella?" I blocked Jasper out, he was using his usual soothing tone that blended into the background. It was effective for asking difficult questions without putting someone on the defensive. He was so much better at this than I was. I took one last undisturbed breath before she launched into her narrative.

The pain in Bella's voice was completely unbearable. I had known that the relationship with Jacob was more than she wanted any of us to know about but I had no idea how much pain it had caused her. This wound was as deep as the one that I caused but I couldn't shake the feeling that it was still my fault. What happened to Jacob was fall-out from my mistakes and Bella blamed herself.

She had loved that boy, and he was a boy, more than she realized. She just loved me more. He had apparently handled it rather gracefully and taken care of my Bella anyway until that night. Bella described it in more detail than I care to remember. She was freezing to death and he stripped her down and crawled into the sleeping bag with her to warm her cold skin. I longed to be able to do that for her but I never could. That was the one thing that I could never give Bella, warmth.

Jacob behaved the way that any hot blooded American werewolf would. They had been dating for a while, and he could touch her without hurting her so he made a move, but Bella rejected him. If he had still been alive when she told her story I would have told him how much I admired his restraint and strength for telling her that they could take things slowly, that he would wait. I suddenly felt slightly better about having left her. Jacob Black and Bella Swan would have had a chance at a normal life together, or at least as normal of a life as Bella was capable of experiencing. It would have taken years but she might have accepted him eventually.

Then she said it. Bella called my name in her sleep while he held her. It wasn't her fault but he hadn't deserved that. He put his whole heart into her and she couldn't do the same for him. The closest approximation to the relationship that she and I shared was the imprinting experienced by certain wolves. Separation was painful and impossible to get over; I haunted her dreams even after I was gone for so long. I said a silent apology to Jacob. Bella by all rights should have been his but I was there and the draw was too strong.

I understood the rage that he experienced and admired this boy's ability to control his emotions and keep Bella safe from himself. I couldn't say that I would have been as gentle or as patient as he was had I been the one holding her while she slept, curled into her soft form, smelling her freesia and strawberry scent when she moaned another man's name. I would have left in search of the other man and riped him to shreds and I knew it. However, this man-child allowed her to sleep and tried to talk to her about it in the morning. To top it all off he didn't leave her, he continued to protect her. I would never disrespect another werewolf again.

"You want to know why I feel guilty about loving Edward? Jacob Black is why I feel guilty about loving Edward. I couldn't love him because Edward has and always will have my heart and soul. I can't deny that. Edward pulls me like gravity." Her shoulders hunched slightly inward and I felt my body involuntarily mimic hers. She didn't want to love me, she was trapped.

"I can't stay away from him and I hate myself for it. The problem is that when I'm with him is the only time that I feel good; it's the only time that I'm truly happy. It's horribly unhealthy and I should hate him and yell and scream at him but I can't. I tried being mad but I only lasted around eight hours and then he got on my bike. You and I both know what happened then." My thoughts wandered to the sensation of my body wrapped around hers on the bike. The flutter of her heart and the soaring feeling of just being near her. I watched her shudder as she remembered the contact too.

"I couldn't even lie to myself because I knew that you knew what I was feeling and by proxy Edward had to know. Sometimes, being surrounded by supernatural beings really sucks." It was unfair that I had access to Jasper and Alice and that I asked for that information about her. It was cowardly, I wanted to know how she felt without declaring my own feelings. I was no worse than those awkward teenage boys at Forks High School who waited and then asked her out only when they thought that they were safe. The guilt was overwhelming.

However, the pain eased when she declared herself. "I do love him and I can't deny that. He's like a basic need for me; he needs a place on Maslow's ladder where I'm concerned. Being away from him isn't an option."

I secretly wondered where I ranked n Maslow's hierarchy of needs and promised myself that I would discover this information later. Bella slipped back into anger when Jasper defended me and let her know the depth of my feelings for her. I don't know why she argued with him; she had to know how I felt. I told her as often as I could but there was the one lie before I left her. It was amazing the amount of damage that one lie could do.

Then, Jasper stole everything that I wanted to say to her. She didn't see that this boy would have loved her anyway. She couldn't fathom the draw that she had and that she inspired incredibly fierce loyalty. Bella couldn't help it. She was too good and we would follow her to the ends of the Earth. Jasper told her this in his own words. He may not have convinced her of the facts but he did seem to get her to understand that this was not solely her fault.

He really is amazing isn't he? Alice looked up and I agreed with her. Jasper had made some significant headway with Bella.

Then, Jasper did it... he launched into an explanation of our current situation.

"Edward isn't going to like this..." Jasper was right, Edward didn't like this. Edward was angry that Jasper would consider explaining the gravity of the situation to Bella. Edward was upset enough that he was thinking about himself in the third person!

I stopped. Surely Jasper had a good reason for explaining the impending battle that awaited us this evening and it had better be good because Bella was going to fret about it until it happened. This only gave her time to plan something stupidly heroic. I fretted and resumed pacing.

Edward, he needs her to know. There is going to be some acting required on her part and she may handle things better if she knows exactly how bad the worst case scenario is if this coven isn't destroyed. Alice looked up and I hesitated on one step before pacing again.

"Alice, this is Bella we're talking about."

"Edward, this is Jasper we're talking about."

"But-"

"No! You need to stop turning into a complete lunatic anytime she's in danger." Alice stood back from me just far enough for our eyes to meet without straining. "Bella is perfectly sensible so long as you are. The problem is that you get scared and you push. If she trusts us and trusts the plan she'll stick to it."

We stared at each other and listened to Jasper explain southern vampire history, including his own role, and how that affected her. Emmett huffed behind us while Carlisle called Esme to check on the werewolves and Rosalie busied herself with something mindless on her phone. Alice and I continued our staring match until I quickly broke eye contact looking at the horizon. The sun had shifted low enough to cast an orange glow across the valley.

Not long now. Carlisle hung up with Esme and stood. He dusted himself off and folded his arms.

"I can do this." Bella's words rang through Alice's memory.

"She can do this." Alice reaffirmed.

The door to the warehouse opened and four vampires stalked out taking a defensive posture. Jasper followed, gently guiding Bella in front of him. The light from the sunset had turned a warm purple. Bella's coloring was a stark contrast to the vampires surrounding her. The group proceeded at a human pace up the hill. Jasper kept an arm around Bella's shoulders and caught her every time she slipped on the grass.

Emmett moved to my side and clapped a hand on my shoulder. I know, because if that were Rosalie that I would want to do the same but you can't run down there right now. We need darkness and level ground. You have to wait. 'Operation Save Bella' depends on it.

"'Operation Save Bella'?" I turned to him.

"Like it? I do." His grin spread from ear to ear.

I shook my head. Emmett was in a jovial mood but the prospect of fighting, play or otherwise had always excited him. Carlisle had already begun assessing Bella's condition even though he couldn't see her hand up close or get a feel for it's coloring in the fading light.

Edward, in case you don't know, she's pretending to hate you. Jasper thought as soon as he knew I could hear him clearly.

They stopped a few feet in front of us. Bella sheepishly looked up at me from under her hair. She studied me as carefully as I studied her. I cataloged every detail. She seemed to be in less pain but her right hand was turning blue as Alice had predicted and she held the arm over her chest to protect it. Her eyes swept my body in the same way that mine had swept over hers, she would find no damage or defect and she knew it. Did she know that her chances of survival were limited. I didn't recall Jasper telling her how many scenarios we had to get through in order to find just one that offered her a chance of survival. She dug her teeth into her lower lip and I supressed the urge to run the few yards that stood between us and hold her.

"Alright, you've seen her, let's talk about terms." Adrianna sneered.

That's not the deal, Carlisle was supposed to see her first. Emmett's grip on my shoulder tightened just to the point of causing pain.

That's not going to work, Carlisle has to have her in his arms before we fight. Jasper warned with wide eyes.

But Carlilse had it under control.

"No, the agreement was that I got to examine her before any deals were made." He stepped forward to collect my Bella. She relaxed and took a small step toward him.