(Twilight theme by Stephanie Meyer)

BPOV

The weekend with Alice turned into her vicarious journey into girl world. She painted my nails and braided my hair in all sorts of unrealistic daily hair dos. Rosalie even joined in on the fun, she still was not a big fan of me, but I think the guilt she felt over prematurely announcing my death to Edward made it so she felt compelled to make an effort with me. It was about 11 in the evening when I started to force my yawns and excuse myself from all the fun.

"I'm human remember? I need sleep." I said as an excuse knowing full well that Edward most likely left a human care sheet with Alice.

1. Make sure she is fed every few hours.

2. She needs 8 hours of sleep per night

3. No werewolves

4. Torture with endless beauty products

That is what I imagined the list to include anyway. Alice finally relented and I stepped into Edward's room ready to curl up on his black leather sofa. I entered the room and was greeted by a huge four post bed.

"Alice?" I said and she was by my side looking giddy at my reaction.

"He didn't want you to sleep on the couch so he got a bed."

"Um, isn't that a little massive for someone who doesn't even sleep?"

"It's for you…" She said her tone thick with disappointment, most likely from my tone.

"Um, where is my overnight bag?" I asked her now feeling uncomfortable. She walked to a dresser and opened the third drawer to display all my items and some new clothes. I was not surprised, Alice was always treating me like her life sized Barbie doll. I grabbed my sweats and toiletries bag and headed into the bathroom. I took my time and enjoyed the illusion of privacy in this bathroom. When I emerged the room was empty and I relaxed a little. I stood at the foot of the California King sized bed and the unease that I felt made up my mind for me. I took a pillow and the throw blanket and lay down on the couch as I had originally planned. I began counting sheep when I heard a small

knock at the door. I watched as the hall light poured into the room and Rosalie was in the doorway.

"Bella?" She said softly, and my shock caused me to pop up and look at her.

"Hi, Rosalie."

"You don't like the bed?" She said looking at the unwrinkled bed spread.

"It just feels awkward, I don't know…" I shook my head and felt her eyes settle on my face. I could barely see her in the dark room, but I was sure she could see me.

"We should talk; I need to say a few things to you."

"Um, talk about what?"

"Edward and Alice told us about their promise to the Volturi. I know that you think that becoming one of us is what is best for you, but I am not sure you know what you are asking Bella."

"I know that I love Edward and this is the only way that we can be together."

"Bella, I want to have this talk with you, but I need you to hear me out, I would not say these things to you just to be mean. You are a part of our family no matter what you are, that means we all care about what is best for you."

"Then, why don't you want me to be one of you Rosalie?"

"I want so much more for you. Before you met Edward how did you see your life going? What did you see in your future?"

"Um, I would finish school and go on to college."

"After college?"

"Start a career then maybe one day get married."

"Married, did you see a family in that future?"

"A very blurry one, but yes, I did."

"If you become one of us that future could never happen. Your life and time would have a completely different significance for you. You could go to college, but after that you would still look like an eighteen year old, how long could you stay in one place before the people around you figured out what you are?"

"So I won't be able to have a career, but I would have Edward."

"Will he always be enough? What about your family, your friends?"

I thought about never seeing Charlie again, or Jacob and my stomach developed a knot. I had to focus; I could not let this conversation plant doubt in my head.

"The Volturi are going to check on me."

"Bella, that could be years from now. You would be well into your 40's before that became an issue and at that point you are perfectly hidden from their guards. Edward has already planned out a way for you to get around them."

"Do you see me and Edward together when I am forty?"

"Honestly?"

"Of course." I said and I braced myself for her blunt honesty.

"I see you getting tired of sacrificing yourself. You are an independent person and the idea of sacrificing the experiences that give meaning to a short life for someone who will go on living long after you are gone will push you two apart. I am not sure, if I see you and Edward together if you are still human at forty."

"I understand your point about missing out on human experiences, but if I am no longer human I think I will be able to move past it Rosalie. I just don't know how to convince him."

"You have people on your side, but I am not sure if Edward will budge on this subject. You should get some rest, and I think the bed would be a better choice than the couch."

She got up quickly and I realized that she must have heard Alice coming. She burst into the room and removed Rosalie from my side closing the door after them. I heard some whispers, but nothing I could piece together I decided to lock Edward's door. I had a lot to think about and I did not need Alice to come in and lecture me. I crawled onto the huge bed and it felt like I was being swallowed up. I curled myself under the throw blanket and drifted off to sleep.

The morning was grey as usual, Saturday; usually I would be making some breakfast and talking to Charlie about his fishing plans. After my unusual conversation with Rosalie I missed Charlie, even though I saw him yesterday, it was the idea that I was so close, yet I could not go and see him. I was beginning to see her point, but it was not like Charlie would always be around. The thoughts of my father's mortality gave me a chill and I sunk down under the blanket to try and escape.

"Bella, I know you are awake and it is almost 11 you should eat." Alice called from the other side of the door. I swept my hair out of my face and walked towards the door to let her in.

"Good morning Alice." I said while rubbing the sleep from my eyes and taking in the huge tray stacked with food. "Holy crow Alice, who is all of that for?"

"I wasn't sure what you normally eat so I made a few of the breakfast staples. If I were human I would probably start with these." She pointed to the stack of pancakes and my tummy grumbled in agreement.

"Thanks Alice, sorry I'm being such a brat."

"Don't worry Bella; I just hope you understand he just wants to protect you. He loves you."

"Then why won't he change me Alice? You heard them; they will kill me if they find out that I have not been changed. He wouldn't need to protect me if I were a little more durable you know?"

"I don't have the answers to those questions Bella. He was angry enough last year when I spilled the mechanics of the change to you. He will go ballistic if I get involved in this conversation."

"Do you still see me becoming one of you?"

"Yes, but that could change at any time Bella."

"That is all I needed to know Alice. Great pancakes by the way." She smiled and I saw the apprehension leave her face.

The rest of the day was spent in dressing rooms and other girly activities in Port Angeles, then Seattle. When we returned I decided to do some bonding with Rosalie and Esme as they watched some gory marathon. Alice would pop in to watch pieces of the movie, but had some project going on in her room also. After two of the Saw movies they allowed me to pick the next disc. I scanned through their extensive collection and stopped when I came to an unexpected find. I pulled the disc and tossed it to Rosalie who snatched it out of the air with amazing grace and accuracy. Esme laughed when it started, "Interview with the Vampire? That is what you chose as your scary movie?"

"It is a much better movie and no one gets thrown into a pit of used syringes. Plus I couldn't resist watching it with real vampires." I said making a scary voice and causing more laughter to rip from them. This is the most relaxed I had felt since I got to this house. I fell asleep in the living room and woke in the early morning to a cool hand brushing my hair from my face. I opened my eyes slowly and found Edward sitting on the bed next to me.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you. Go back to sleep love."

I knew I was angry with him, but after these past few days without him and all the extra thinking I had been doing I was unable to hold that grudge. I lifted my arms up and he automatically hugged me to his hard chest and I breathed in his scent.

"You're back early."

"I wanted some time with you away from Charlie. Are you still upset with me?"

"Yes, but I think I know why I am upset. I need to know where this is going Edward."

"Go back to bed; we will talk about this in the morning."

"I will go back to bed, but I want to know just one thing."

"What is that?"

"Are you planning to change me, ever?"

"I honestly have not decided. As it stands now? No." He said ready for a debate. I had prepared myself for his answer and I decided to keep to my word and stop the conversation there.

"Oh…good night." I said and I curled back under the covers. I closed my eyes and I felt him staring at me, but I just tried to fall back to sleep. I didn't want to fight right now. I got the confirmation I needed and I was going home in a few hours. I could cry or whatever this feeling in my chest was, I could let it out then.

Alice dropped me home the next morning and I was greeted by Emily and Sue as I walked to my door.

"Bella!" Emily shouted from the cab of her truck and I hurried to help them carry up some food.

"Hey Emily, Hi Sue, I didn't know you were stopping by. How is everyone?" I asked Sue, she looked much better than when I saw her at the BBQ. Her smile reached her eyes now and I knew that she was finally moving on after Harry's passing.

"Seth and Leah are just fine, Seth has been following Jacob and his friends around like a lost puppy lately, but I would rather he be in with those boys than some of the hoodlums walking around La Push."

"Yeah, Jake will keep him out of trouble. How is Sam?" I turned to Emily and she shrugged in the familiar Emily fashion.

"Busy as ever with the council, I still have the whole pack of guys at my house eating me out of house and home. I was lucky to escape with this care package."

"It smells great, Charlie will be happy, although I am sure he has been eating take out all weekend." I said continuing our small talk.

"That man is very lucky to have you Bella; I don't know what he will do when you go to college in a few months. Have you decided where you are going?" Sue asked me.

"I haven't heard back from anyone yet, but I am hoping for Alaska or maybe one of my east coast schools." I said not wanting to meet their disappointed gazes. I am sure they wanted to hear that I would be going to U of W.

Sue and Charlie spent most of the time in the kitchen reminiscing about Harry, and I took the opportunity to catch up with Emily about pack news as we ate. Emily seemed eager to latch on to me, and I attributed the behavior to the fact that she was not very familiar with Charlie.

"Besides hungry, how are the guys?" I asked her knowing that we could talk more openly now.

"Sam is a little… disappointed with you." She said hesitantly, which took me by surprise. I thought we had finally fixed everything at the BBQ the other night. Jacob and I were talking on a regular basis now…

"Sam is mad at me? Why?"

"Do you really need to ask Bella? Think about how the two of you met, wouldn't you be upset?"

Sam had found me after Edward left me in the woods all those months ago. He was leading a pack of kids against the attacks of a dangerous vampire brought here because of the Cullens. His pain was my pain at one point and now here I was kissing the enemy. Pulling away from Jacob and his thoughts invaded the pack mind. I would be upset, I looked like a traitor.

"I am not trying to be disloyal. I care about all of them."

"Well, in this war Bella fence walkers are not given amnesty on our side." Emily said the words, but they did not sound like they belonged in her mouth. They sounded like the words of an Alpha wolf, an angry Alpha wolf.

"Is that why you brought the care package for Charlie?" I said letting the hurt from her deception leak into my tone.

"The pack is worried that your boyfriend did not explain the terms of the treaty to you and that your judgment is clouded by your feelings for him."

"What terms?"

"A war between the Cullens and the pack will ensue if the Cullens bite anyone." She looked at me then over to Charlie and Sue who were still wrapped up in their own conversation. I sat quietly for a long time and thought about the words. I thought about what Rosalie had said to me and the Volturi.

"What is the penalty if the person bitten wants or chooses to be bitten?" I said softly and slowly.

"The same." She said in a harsh tone. She was quiet and her eyes looked like they were full of pain and disgust. "I am going to pretend you did not ask me that Bella. It would break Jacob's heart."

She motioned to Sue that it was time to go. "Bella, I have delivered the message and you need to make the decision. You are either with us, or you are with them, you can't have it both ways." Those words did sound like they were from her mouth. They were final and held a deadline for me.

I was left sitting on my couch in silence. Charlie walked the girls out and I locked myself in my room.

"Bella you okay? How was the sleepover?" Charlie called through the door.

"I am not feeling that great Dad. I'll fill you in at dinner tomorrow night."

"Do you need some water?"

"No thanks!" I groaned and listened for his footsteps leading away from my door. It was still fairly early, but I needed to do some thinking and I needed to do it today. The stress was killing my relationships. I knew that I needed to get away. At school I had finished catching up and over the weekend I finished the work for the rest of the week. I thought about picking up and going to Jacksonville to visit Renee, but Charlie would never allow it. I had given him enough to worry about these past few months and running away to Florida would not help. I locked my window and pulled my curtains shut, so I would not be tempted into a distraction. The rest of the day I spent staring at my ceiling and listening to music. I drowned everything out even the phone calls and taps at my window. Around 10pm Charlie knocked on my door to say goodnight and to let me know that Edward would be picking me up for school in the morning. I could tell he wasn't happy about playing messenger boy, but I didn't even answer I just remained silent and eventually drifted off into another nightmare.

This nightmare was different; I was in the living room at Nana's house. It was so silent that the ticking of her old clock was all I could hear. I stood up to find her, but the house was empty. There were no pictures on the mantle as there usually were. I took a closer look at the living room and realized it was not Nana's house. I scrambled to the mirror and here I was in the familiar part of the nightmare. Staring at the mirror at a horror struck old version of me. I tried to shake myself awake, but I couldn't I was stuck in this empty house, with no memories to show for all my years. Just wrinkles and scars, this was my future.

(A/N: One more chapter to go. Conclusion and Jacob up ahead. Thanks for the read through and punctuation help Nici!)