Things Unsaid by blustripe
Summary: Three months after the defeat of Metaria, Minako shows up unexpectedly on Rei's doorstep. When she stays the night, will they finally say what they've always wanted to? Rei/Minako PGSM based
Discalimer: I do not own Sailor Moon or any of the characters or stories. But I do own these words. Please do not duplicate in whole or in part without my permission
Things Unsaid - Chapter 4
Rei knew she was hiding. She almost laughed at the irony that she was so out in the open, covered only by the stars and the tree above her. It must have been at least an hour. An hour since the fight with Minako, since the burning, since the second kiss...
She inwardly marveled at how quickly everything had collided and smashed into pieces. Minako never wasted any time did she? Less than a day and a half and things had already come to this.
This? What was this?
100, 99, 98, 97...
Rei could still feel her. The spicy wet assault on her lips. For a moment she had allowed herself to breathe, to inhale the essence of another. But the safety lock that guarded her heart for a decade had faithfully triggered itself and clamped its iron gates firmly around her heart. Now she sat slumped against a tree in the courtyard counting backwards and forwards from a hundred, naming the constellations in the sky and reciting their histories. Rei had to keep herself calm. Even the slightest crack in her armor might have lead to a full implosion. Silly Minako. If anyone could understand the necessity of isolation, it should have been her. She decided on preferring that they stay rivals. Rei could fend against fists, blunt and clumsy and falling dead upon her steel plating. But the piercing thrust of intimacy, against that she was defenseless. Once it cut through her shell and buried itself in her heart, she would be open to the world.
And that could never happen.
Never.
72, 71, 70, 69...
Still, she had no desire to hurt Minako. She almost pitied her comrade for falling victim to the infectious sensations she had tried so long to block out. Rei had never witnessed such desperation as she had in Minako's embrace. The way she pressed every inch of their bodies together and slid her hands possessively around her back.
56, 55, 54, 53...
The way she inhaled and exhaled through her nose as her mouth was busy tasting every corner of her own.
52, 51, 50, Fifty, FIFTY...
"Fifty!" she cried to the sky and let her head fall into her hands.
Rei rubbed her lips against her palms, attempting to scrub all lingering sensation away. Try as she might, Minako just couldn't be erased.
It was dangerous, it was wrong.
Fifty one, fifty two.
But it felt good. So good.
Fifty two, fifty one.
It was her own damn fault for leading Minako on. For opening herself just the tiniest bit and pretending she could be honest. Rei knew agony, and bringing it upon her friend was quite possibly the last thing she could ever want. What to say? What to do? Minako, I'm sorry. Minako, lets just forget this. Rei supposed it was entirely possible. Minako could leave in the morning and they would never have to speak of this again. Both of them had become excellent pretenders over the years. What's one more thing to hide?
Fifty two.
But Rei had to ask herself honestly, was that truly the best idea? Minako didn't seem the type to handle rejection so well. Perhaps they could start over. Be friends. No, that had never worked.
Rei growled in frustration and wrung her hands until they were bright pink. Hiding wasn't her style. Confrontation was the only logical approach to the situation. She would look Minako straight in the eye and say what she had to say.
But what was that, exactly?
Lost in the haze of confusion, Rei squeezed her hands tighter. A burning sensation made its way from her stomach to her throat and up into her eyes where angry little tears struggled for freedom from behind her eyelids. Rei almost never cried. She cried when her mother died and when Minako died and for the rejection of her father. Until this weekend, that was pretty much it. The past two days were quickly becoming a blur of tears and confessions, smeared across a backdrop of uncertainty.
How could she have been so cold? Minako, sweet Minako had offered herself up, bare and honest more alive than Rei could ever remember feeling. Tender and afraid but with more bravery than Rei had needed in her most dire moment.
She was hiding. Rei knew it. She was a coward.
Fifty one, fifty….
"Minako," she wailed, "Minako." Finally allowing herself to shake, the tears fell freely and pooled in her palms.
"Forty nine," she whispered.
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Rejected. Cold and hard, Rei was a liar. Sitting motionless on the floor beside the defeated fire, Minako focused all her strength into keeping the tears at bay.
That morning had been so glorious. With a renewed sensitivity she hadn't felt in ages, Minako had plucked up the courage to actually kiss Rei. What exactly made her do it she still hadn't quite figured out. More importantly, Rei had accepted it. Like a glimmering beacon of defiance, that kiss stood atop the mountain of their historically disastrous relationship. After one night of confessions and one morning of silent honesty, Minako had, if only for a second, believed that this actually might work.
Intimacy.
Intimacy was not for her.
She had pushed it too far too soon. Possessed by an overheated heart, she had crashed herself into Rei, this time with nothing more complex than simple, earthly desire. Rei had teased her, given her a taste, and then pushed her even farther away than before with such a force that could have broken bones.
She was a tease and a liar. Caught of guard perhaps, but still a liar.
I'm not like that, she said. Whether with those words or the kiss, Rei had lied to her.
She supposed it was fair. Minako had lied about more things than she could count. This was what she got for trying to be real again. It would be easier, she reasoned, to just go back to the way things were. Only now she didn't have the convenience of a fatal illness to hide behind.
Minako shuddered at her own thoughts. She didn't actually wish she were still sick did she? For all she knew the tumor was still there. There had been no more fainting or spells of dizziness, but neither any concrete proof that she was actually healed. Minako had just assumed that being resurrected meant a second chance at life.
She traced her fingers over the unusually smooth patch of skin on her arm that had once been pocketed by the tiny pinprick scabs of the IV. She was always careful to keep that part of her body hidden during photo shoots. Not that anyone would have noticed. Oddly, Minako found herself missing the constant, calming drip. When life was as simple as survival. She traced her fingertips along the vein with a certain twisted fondness she couldn't quite decipher. Letting a part of yourself go was hard, malignant or not.
Minako stood up and wandered over to the bathroom. She sat on the counter and twisted the handle of the sink, allowing a single drop to fall and splatter itself against the porcelain. Until recently her life had been so conveniently formulaic. Protect the Princess. Without the guise of a single minded mission, Minako had found herself clueless as to what to do next.
Did she really want Rei, or was she only after her for the sake of progression?
She sighed as another droplet plummeted to the bottom of the sink. Silly girl, she scolded herself.
Still robotic as ever.
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Rei awoke to a bright sun glaring down on her and a rough tree digging into her back. She rubbed a few sore spots and laughed to herself. She had never fallen asleep outside before. Her escapism had officially risen to a new level. Pulling a leaf out of her hair, she sighed and gazed at the greenery above her. With the air as still as the breath in her chest, the small leaves remained motionless. The sun was high. It couldn't have been too early. Rei supposed Minako was inside, probably still sleeping. She always was a late sleeper.
She prepared herself for the planned confrontation. Trying in vain to calm the rapidly quickening pulse in her chest, she attempted to sort out exactly what she would say. But before she could craft barely a full sentence, she heard the door to the temple slide closed.
Minako stood bag in hand in front of the door, her eyes focused sternly ahead. She walked briskly across the courtyard and past Rei, not even sending her so much as a glance. She stopped at the front gate, dropping her bag onto the ground and crossing her arms firmly across her chest as she leaned against the wall.
Still groggy from sleep, and still sore from being pressed up against a tree for so long, Rei rubbed here eyes as she stood up and wandered over to Minako.
"What are you doing?" she asked, her voice slightly hoarse.
Without looking at her, Minako responded curtly. "I'm Leaving. My limousine should be here any minute."
"Oh," Rei spoke to the ground. It seemed she had not yet regained the ability of conversation. "You're leaving without Artemis?"
"He'll find me."
"You don't have to leave, Minako."
"I don't have to do anything. I'm choosing to leave."
"That's not what I meant," she said in an apologetic tone.
Rei squinted her eyes at the brightness of the sun peering through the trees.
"Just please stay a little longer," she whispered, "there's stuff I want to talk about."
"Well you still have a few minutes. What is it you want to say?"
Minako turned her head and sent Rei a hard and uninviting stare.
"Well," Rei began, her voice quivering. "You see..."
She honestly had no idea what was going to come out of her mouth.
"About what happened. I...uh...I'm sorry and I didn't want to make you upset. It's just confusing and I'm really bad at this stuff."
Minako's stare remained unaffected while Rei grimaced and slightly squirmed under her intense gaze.
"It that all?"
"Yes. Well, no. Not really. Can you just come inside? I'll cook us something."
"Honestly, Rei. I'm an immensely busy person. I've already wasted two days here. There are six more songs I need to record before the launch."
A sleek, black limousine stealthily pulled up before them, the engine so quiet Rei hadn't even heard it coming. As Minako approached the car, the young driver speedily got out and hurried over to open her door.
"I can do it myself," she huffed, opening the car door with more strength than necessary.
"Minako, wait!"
"If you'd like to continue this, please contact my manager and set up an appointment."
And with that she slammed the door closed. The driver returned to the front and gracefully pulled away, Rei shrinking in the rearview mirror.
"Where are you headed, miss?"
"Back to the apartment."
She clutched her bag tightly to her chest and allowed herself to silently weep.
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A/N: Super sorry for the late update. I had finals, and then I got sick. Yes, I'm aware that this chapter kind of sucked, but please feel free to point out why if you are so inclined. I promise the next will be better, and more intense. Oh and I couldnt add any lines for some reason. It pissed me off.