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A/N: I'm awful at updating... I know, so hopefully this chapter might make up for it.

Tuvok stared at the information in front of him. If he hadn't been suppressing his emotions he would have been shocked and angered at what he read.

Tom Paris had seen a lot of Doctors in his time and the necessary fields for each admission had been filled, however somewhat half-heartedly. Tuvok felt that part of the picture was missing, although some blanks were now filled, and questions had been answered ever more questions were appearing.

He sighed as he shut down the work station in front of him. He was in for an uphill battle.

XXXXXXXXXX

Tom practically ran to his quarters. It wasn't what Tuvok said it was, he wasn't Self-Injuring, that was what other people did, he was just relieving himself, right?

Entering the code to his quarters he ran in and sat on his bed, tugging at his bedside drawer to take out his tool kit. He looked at the items in front of him, this wasn't a problem, this was what was saving him, and they saved him from himself.

He thought back to when he had first cut himself, it had just sort of happened. Granted it had seemed like the logical next step at the time, moving from scratching his arms with his nails to cutting, and then it had escalated to burning as well. But he had it under control; he could stop if he wanted, he just didn't want to.

He could hear a part of him denying his control. 'But the urges' it kept repeating, 'you're an addict' he shook his head to shake these thoughts away. The urges were nothing, he just had to feel alive and he was ok to face anything the delta quadrant had to throw at him, everyone on the ship had their ways of coping with being so far from home and being at risk from unknown alien threats. This was just his way of coping.

The thoughts kept swirling in his head and it felt like a hand was gripping his heart as he held back tears. This wasn't fair, how dare the captain judge him, how dare they think he needed therapy, he was ok, he was fine and what he did in his spare time was his business and not theirs. His actions weren't threatening the smooth running of the ship, the only thing affecting his performance were his 'fans'.

Perhaps this was the Captains way of passing the buck he thought, she doesn't want to upset the fragile balance on board by defending me, no-one would support her, I'm just Tom Paris: ex-fleet, ex-Marquis, Convict, Screw up... he sighed as he lowered his head into his hands. They were just using his coping method against him so they could re-direct the focus off his 'fans'

Gathering up his tools he placed them back in the drawer and lay back on his bed, throwing an arm over his eyes, biting his lip in frustration at his situation he groaned when he heard the door chime ring.

XXXXXXXXXXX

Chakotay rang the bell again; perhaps Tom was still in Sickbay.

'Computer, Location of Lieutenant Tom Paris'

'Lieutenant Tom Paris is in his quarters'

Chakotay nodded his head in response and glanced at the floor unsure of what to do. Perhaps Tom was fine and just wanted some alone time, but the fact that the Captain felt that Tom might be scared of him shook him to the core.

He may not like the man but he didn't hate him. Tom had saved his life on numerous occasions and despite this he still resented Tom.

Taking in a deep breath he decided to ring again, when there was no answer a part of him started to worry. Maybe Paris wasn't as well as he had appeared when he left sickbay, maybe something had happened to him.

Standing undecided he tapped his comm.

'Chakotay to Janeway'

'Janeway here, what is it Chakotay?'

'Are you in your ready room?'

'Yes, why? What is it?

'I'm outside Tom Paris's quarters, he isn't answering when I ring, and I'm concerned...'

'Perhaps he just wants some time alone'

'Perhaps, but I'm worried that maybe something has happened.'

'Chakotay if you feel so strongly then enter his quarters, I know your worried about how he maybe perceives you, but if there is something wrong then you should check it out, now go and check, you're wasting time'

Chakotay didn't waste time and immediately overrode the lock to Tom's quarters. On entering he saw Tom lying on his bed. Tom hadn't stirred as Chakotay had entered.

'Lieutenant Paris?' said Chakotay as he strode over to the prone form.

Tom felt his heart skip a beat. That voice, it sounded like Chakotay. He had ignored the door chime and allowed himself to drift in his own thoughts, now he regretted that he wasn't prepared to face Chakotay, he was defenceless, and he had let his guard down.

Removing the arm from lying across his eyes he glanced up to see Chakotay looming over him.

'No...' croaked Tom as he backed away.

Chakotay stared down at Tom confused as to his reaction.

'Tom, you didn't answer your door when I rang, I was worried...' he started to say

'Ha, you worried!' snorted Tom

'Tom I...'

'Get out, just get out!' screamed Tom

Chakotay was stunned at the reaction he had received, turning on his heel he left and commed the Captain.

XXXXXXXXXX

'Okay Chakotay, I'll send the Doctor to check on him. In the mean time please come to my ready room'

Janeway sat down, feeling drained from the little she had heard from Chakotay. Composing herself she tapped her comm and contacted the Doctor.

'Janeway to the Doctor'

'Yes, Captain' the Doctor replied with his usual drawl implying he wasn't happy to be disturbed.

'I want you to check on Tom Paris...'

'What? He just left Sickbay...'

'I know, but Chakotay was worried and entered his quarters, there was a confrontation, Chakotay was shaken by it, so I want you to see if Tom is alright.'

'Fine, but please tell your First Officer to stay out of matters that are none of his concern in future, my job is hard enough as it is.'

The communication ended abruptly and Janeway sighed, rising she went to her replicator and replicated herself some strong black coffee, placing it on her desk she regarded the merit of making her First Officer herbal tea before his arrival.

Just as she turned to make the tea she was startled by the door chime.

'Enter'

Chakotay entered.

'Ah, Chakotay I was just about to make you something to drink, what would you like?'

'Some herbal tea, please'

'Take a seat'

She turned to replicate the tea, her mind busy analysing how her first officer looked. He looked like he had seen a ghost. The confrontation with Tom had definitely shaken him. If he looked like this, what would Tom look like?

Turning to place the tea in front of Chakotay, she stopped as he broke the silence.

'I shouldn't have entered his quarters.'

'You were worried, and considering the recent history you were right'

'To enter his quarters or worry?'

'Both, I just wish you had acted more promptly'

'What do you mean?' replied Chakotay reaching over for his cup.

'You hesitated and contacted me, had there been a real medical emergency you wasted valuable seconds'

'I know, but I didn't want to...' Chakotay trailed off

'You didn't want to upset him'

'yes, after what you said earlier, I was worried, I wanted to talk to him, and when he didn't respond I feared maybe he hadn't made it back to his quarters safely. I was upset he thought I had some part in all this, I just wanted to talk to him, straighten things out.'

Kathryn viewed him from over her cup. Sighing she replied, 'it's ok to feel all these things, and your fears are understandable.'

'You didn't see him though, he was terrified... of me!'

'We don't have a full picture yet of what has been happening, but I'm sure Tuvok will straighten everything out, he has quite the knack for fixing things.' She mused, a small smile appearing on her lips.

'I hope so' said Chakotay.

A/N: Please review, as reviews are love! Also, what would you like to have happened in Tom's past? Anything in particular?