A/N: Alright people, here it is. I sincerely apologize for the delay, but things have been just crazy recently; schoolwork, prom (big night! oh, yeah!!!)... Not to mention Christmas shopping. On the other hand, sleep deprivation seems to work for me, I wrote most of this late at night (when I was supposed to be either sleeping or studying). It takes place at the end of season seven episode Death Knell.

As always, I beg you to review, you'll make my day:)

Disclaimer (I realized that there's no dislcaimer before any of the previous chapters, here it is): I don't own Stargate or any of the characters, certainly make no money from this and no copyright infringement is intended. Although, if Santa got my letter... ;-)

Here we go, enjoy!!!

Fourth Time

Memory of the fourth time took him by surprise. As much as he hated to admit it, even to himself, it was one of his most terrifying nightmares, something that still haunted him even after all this time. His gut twisted painfully and he could almost feel the cold hand of fear clenching his throat as he drifted back to that awful day.

*

Jack made his way through the thick forest. In front of him, Teal'c's muscular form was moving at a steady pace, leading the way and clearing away most of the undergrowth. A branch swooshed by his face, but Jack avoided it briskly, breathing out a silent curse. Teal'c looked back over his shoulder, one eyebrow raised in a silent question. Jack took a deep steadying breath and then nodded sharply. Satisfied, Teal'c turned back and resumed his way.

As Jack watched his friend's broad shoulders move before him, he realized again how grateful he was for Teal'c's presence. Honestly, if it hadn't been for the Jaffa's silent support, he would probably have lost it. Those past few days had been unbearable and, for the first time in a long time, Jack was afraid. Really afraid. In fact, he was terrified. His gut clenched painfully as a voice in his head spoke up once again.

Dead.

She might be dead.

Jack tried to ignore the feeling of a heavy block of ice in his chest that this thought produced and tried to find comfort in listing the seemingly hopeless situations that Sam had managed to get them out of.

Not that it worked, this was different and he knew it. This wasn't just some risky SG-1 mission gone wrong, not by a long shot. This was supposed to be a routine research mission, hell, not even that, just a trip to the new Alpha site so that she could work on the anti-Kull-warrior-gun with her dad.

He couldn't lose her. He couldn't. Jack didn't think he would be able to face the pain of losing someone so close to him. No t again. Not this time.

He would find her. He just would.

Another shiver ran down his spine as an image of Sam lying in a puddle of blood somewhere in this godforsaken forest, her blue eyes wide open, hazy and lifeless, staring blindly at him, popped up in his mind.

He had to physically shudder to shake it away, failing to catch a branch that Teal'c was holding out of his way, causing it to shoot his way and whip him right across the face. Before he could think about it twice, Jack instinctively grabbed the branch and bent it swiftly, trying to break it and murmuring various curses as the young branch wouldn't succumb to his strength. He felt anger rise up his throat and just as he thought that he would start yelling at the damn branch, it suddenly gave in and broke in half with a loud crack. Satisfied, Jack threw it away and ignoring Teal'c's questioning look with both of his eyebrows raised, he continued his way.

Okay, he may have overreacted a little, Jack admitted to himself. As a trained soldier, he should have known better than to leave clear evidence of their presence and make it very easy for anyone to track them. But hell, it had made him feel better. At least a little. With no green-as-grass lieutenants and no Daniel around to yell at, he needed something to let out the steam.

And he'd been doing that a lot lately; just couldn't help it. Snapping at everyone who was brave enough to talk to him was the best way of easing the overwhelming sense of fear; and remorse. He shouldn't have let her go alone. Should have come with her. Sure he could have come up with some stupid excuse to be at the Alpha site, but he'd wanted to stay home instead. Enjoy the peace and quiet of his backyard. Dammit! Why did it always have to be her? Her of all people…

His radio cracked.

"O'Neill," said the distorted voice of Colonel Reynolds.

Jack immediately grabbed the radio and mentally whispered a prayer as he pushed the button. "Go ahead."

"A UAV has been shot down in your area. It's four clicks away on a heading of three two zero degrees from your present location."

His heart skipped a beat. "We're on it," he quickly assured Reynolds and without casting a single look at Teal'c, Jack set out in the right direction.

He was almost running and even though Jack could barely hear the Jaffa's footsteps, he knew Teal'c was right behind him. He always was.

Suddenly struggling with the branches and thick undergrowth didn't seem to bother Jack. He ignored the sharp pain and loud cracking in his knees and quickened the pace. Time was of the essence here. She could be anywhere. And the son of a bitch was still after her. Jack pushed himself to run faster.

They ran for some time before Jack had to slow down to catch his breath. Dammit, you're growing old, man, Jack thought, as the wiped the sweat off his forehead. As if to give weight to his thoughts, his left knee cracked loudly. Jack winced at the pain but didn't slow down. Hold on, he told himself, just a little longer. For her.

An explosion rumbled somewhere behind the trees.

All of Jack's musings were forgotten as he collected all of his remaining strength to run again. He was so close, he knew it. His feet hitting the ground at a steady pace created a rhythm in Jack's mind. Run. Faster. Run. Faster.

Finally, they reached the edge of the forest. Behind the sporadic trees there was a clearing full of dust and stones. Faint smell of smoke lingered in the air.

And then he saw her. Crawling on all four, covered in dust and dry blood but she was alive. Alive. Thank God. A wave of relief washed over him, everything seemed to fade into the background as he set out towards her.

Jack felt a weight rest on his shoulder.

He turned around to see Teal'c watching him intently, his eyes full of understanding. The Jaffa nodded briskly towards the clearing.

Jack followed his movement and his heart stopped cold at the sight of the drone getting up from the dust. Fortunately, the years of training kicked in immediately and he wordlessly signaled Teal'c to move to the other side of the clearing and lure the warrior's attention.

He watched as the drone neared Carter's position and it took all of his self-restraint not to run out and shoot the bastard right away.

There were several gunshots and the warrior turned around to follow Teal'c, giving Carter time to take cover behind a nearby rock. Good, at least this part was going well.

Jack stormed out of the trees and ducked down next to her. The drone saw him and headed their way, shooting.

Jack stood up and fired the semi-effective weapon Jacob had given him. No use, the soldier just shrugged and walked on.

"Carter," he yelled over the weapons fire. "I need the…"

She didn't wait for him to finish the sentence and just handed him a small object.

"Thanks," he said briskly, attaching it to his gun.

Jack stood up, aiming the gun at the drone, and, for the umpteenth time today, prayed.

Shot.

The drone staggered. Jack cursed.

Shot.

The drone fell to his knees and landed on the ground with a heavy thud.

Jack, sighing with relief, straightened himself and studied the limp body on the ground. It looked dead. But… With these things, one never knew.

The sound of footsteps to his right reminded Jack of Teal'c's presence. He shot a quick glance at Carter, who was peering from behind the rock, and then tossed his gun to Teal'c. "Cover him."

The Jaffa caught the gun swiftly and proceeded to stand guard over the drone's lifeless body.

Jack looked back at Sam. She was sitting on the ground, leaning against a rock and staring in the direction where the Kull warrior lay.

"Is it…?" she said slowly and looked up to Jack.

Taking in her worn features and hoarse voice, Jack nodded briskly. "Yeah, he's dead." He paused for a moment and glanced in Teal'c's direction. "Right, Teal'c, he's dead." Jack said, the whole sentence sounding more like a question than Jack was willing to admit.

Teal'c looked down at the unnaturally big black form and kicked it. It didn't move and Jack let out a breath of relief.

"Yeah, he's dead," Jack looked down at Sam, who was sitting on the dusty ground and breathing heavily, her head bent down between her knees. Jack noticed a crudely bandaged wound on her thigh. Dammit, she needed medical attention. After so many years in the field, Jack knew that even a less serious wound, if inflamed, could cause some serious problems. He needed to get her to the infirmary as fast as possible.

"You wanna get up?" he asked, unable to entirely conceal the worry in his voice.

Sam shook her head slightly. "I just need to rest for a minute," she muttered quietly. Her breathing was shallow and rapid and sweat ran down her gentle forehead, leaving thin trails in the layer of dust that covered her face.

Her gaze was fixed on the ground, leaving her unaware of Jack's scrutiny. She looked so… vulnerable. As if all of her reserves had been drawn. Dammit, they had been! Jack had seen the look in her eyes just before he and Teal'c had intervened. He'd seen it before; he'd seen too many good men succumb to exhaustion and despair not to recognize it. She'd given up, unable to fight any longer, resigned, in acceptance of her fate. Had they come a minute later… Jack couldn't even finish the thought. He looked back at her. He'd almost lost her.

Sam's shoulders shook weakly as she sucked in a breath.

Damn!

Jack extended his right arm toward her. "C'mere," he whispered softly, pulling her closer.

She didn't resist, in fact, she melted gratefully into his side, placing part of her weight on him. Even though it was a warm day, she was shivering. Jack patted her arm softly and she laid her head on his shoulder.

He felt the warmth of her spread through his body and relief flooded him. She was alive. Alive and safe in his arms. Everything would be alright, because she was alive and he was keeping her safe with Teal'c watching over both of them. He cocked his head slightly, careful not to disturb her, to glance at Teal'c. He was still standing over the soldier's lifeless body, with his back to Jack and Sam.

Jack felt Sam's head grow heavier on his shoulder, her breaths deepening. He rested his chin on the top of her head. A sharp smell of dust and sweat lingered into his nostrils but he ignored it, savoring the moment. She was there, alive and relatively unharmed. He'd saved her.

This time, a tiny voice in his mind whispered. How many more times would he be able to save her? How much longer would he be able to watch out for her? His knees were already giving him a hard time on practically every mission. He was growing old and he knew it. A day would come when he could no longer go out into the field with her. Maybe then he would retire. Maybe then…

Then what?

What would you do then, old fool?

An image sprung up in his mind. Carter holding hands with a man, a much younger man. One so much closer to her age, her heart. Pete. Pete, who wasn't inhibited by stupid rules and regulations. Pete, who was young and strong and without baggage, just like her.

He'd saved her, yes. But not for himself. He'd saved her, so that at the end of the day, she could go to Pete.

She's not yours, O'Neill, she'll never be.

No, she would never be his. But she would be alive. And happy. Jack could settle for that. It hurt like hell to think that one day, she might leave the SGC, leave Daniel and Teal'c… and him behind. But he could deal with it, as long as he knew she had someone to give her what she needed.

It was his duty to keep her alive, so she could be happy. It was Pete's to make her that. And it wasn't up to Jack to judge her choice. It wasn't his right. Not anymore. If he'd ever had that right, he'd lost it long ago. When they'd decided to leave it in the room.

Sam stirred a little, adjusting her position so that her cheek was settled firmly on Jack's shoulder. He lifted his head and realized how limp her body had become. She was asleep.

Jack pulled her closer to himself, carefully resting more of her weight against his side. She needed her rest; and doc Fraiser could wait a little longer.

*

Thank you for reading! If you have any ideas or comments, please, let me know.