A/N: thanks to all of my reviewers! That are quite a lot of you now so trying to name you all is getting a little difficult. ^^; please forgive me. But THANKS TO YOU ALL! And because of your amazing reviewing skills I have updated! ^^ I'm hoping for there to be some lemony goodness in the next chapter or the chapter after that!

CHAPTER 005

Sephiroth sat in the bathtub, knees pulled upwards forming a rest for his elbows, which in turn formed a rest for his head, which was being held in his hands. 'I don't understand!' He mentally pleaded. He'd spent the last several hours attempting to find a solid connection to his mother, though the connection remained week. She was just too far away. 'Please, mother…I don't understand!'

"Neither do I my son. After all he is your greatest enemy."

'Not just that HE'S THE FUCKING SAME SEX AS ME!' Sephiroth let out a slight whimper of defeat. He didn't like how things were going. He still had his mind, but he had his younger self's emotions and longings. How could he cope with both factors when he didn't even understand them.

"I do not understand it either."

His head snapped up as he felt his mothers presents vanish. He blinked, bowing his head again. Her voice was getting weaker and weaker and he was beginning to worry that soon he wouldn't be able to feel her presents at all. He would be alone to handle whatever would come until he could reach her.

'I hate this.'

*

The next morning Sephiroth sat at the dining room table reading the latest Shinra news while Zack munched away at his breakfast. Both glanced up as Cloud entered, rubbing his rather red eyes. Sephiroth felt a slight heat lick at his ears, and was glad that his hair was—at the moment—hiding his ears. Zack grinned. "GOOD MORNING SLEEPING BEAUTY!"

The cadet winced and covered his ears, leaning against the door frame.

"Please Zack…not so loud." He grumbled, approaching the table. Zack smiled, standing and crossing towards the coffee pot.

"Hey, no biggy Cloud, a cup or two of coffee and some water and you'll be good as rain."

Cloud grumbled and slouched over the table, resting his head on its smooth surface.

Sephiroth eyed the blond, who didn't show any signs of remembering the events of the previous evening. That was good, or at least Sephiroth thought it was anyway. He didn't want to have to think about it, and the cadet not remembering at all made him forgetting a WHOLE lot easier.

*

After breakfast, and several cups of coffee Sephiroth sat in his office going over paper work. He sighed, he had completed a mountain of paperwork the previous night and still he had paper work to do, it was as if the paper work would NEVER end. He wondered how he ever got it done before. And how he could have liked it totally confused him.

He glanced up as his door opened, his mood darkening slightly as in waltzed the always hyper active Zack. "Zackary, I am very busy can this wait?"

Zack paid him no head and merely leaned his palms upon the desk gazing at him. Sephiroth was taken aback. Zack had never given him the 'serious' look before, it was rather unsettling. "Zack?"

"You have a thing for Cloud don't you?"

This hit Sephiroth like a frying pan to the face. He blinked. "I saw you eyeing him this morning…there is no denying that look in your eye when you looked at him!"

Sephiroth's jaw tightened and he leaned forward glaring at his LT.

"THIS LOOK!"

Zack leaned back slightly, it was obvious he'd caught Sephiroth in a bad mood.

"uh, no that's more like rage then love."

Sephiroth leaned back in his chair, rubbing his forehead.

"Zack I do not have time for this."

"So you don't deny your love for Cloud!?"

Sephiroth's eyebrow twitched. //This is going to be along day.\\

*

Once Sephiroth had managed to rid himself of the ever persistent Zackary Fair, he had successfully completed his paperwork and was free by lunch time—not that he knew what he was going to do with his spare time. He wandered around the Shinra building for awhile, reading up on the latest news, and calculating mentally how long it would be till he would get his first opportunity to locate his beloved mother. The sudden rush of loneliness washed over him. Now he knew he was truly alone…he could no longer feel his mothers presents, at all. How he was going to survive the next sixth months was beyond him. "Hmn?" He paused and gazed through the large glass windows that over looked the cadet training area. He knew he couldn't be seen, the glass looked like a mirror when in the training room as to prevent those in training from losing their focus. He watched as the cadets sparred, and practiced their swordsmanship. They were all an mature at best, all but one. His eyes narrowed. The only one who showed any hopes of ever becoming a well-to-do swordsmen was cadet Cloud Strife. His jaw tightened as he watched the cadet sparring with one of the instructors, he was determined as ever, and every mistake was quickly corrected. This young fifteen-year-old boy would be his demise, no, was his demise.

He turned away as a slight heat crept along his cheeks and the bridge of his nose. He glanced back over his shoulder at the cadet. His eyes were narrowed, his teeth clenched in a determined snarl, sweat trickling down his neck. Sephiroth unknowingly let his guard down and leaned his hands against the barrier of the window watching the blonds every move. //That look…that absolutely ferial look…it was the same look he gave me at the reactor…his true self, his true rage…a beautiful phoenix born from the ashes of his small exterior.\\ Sephiroth thought, only coming to himself as a sudden heat began to flare up in his lower abdomen. He shook his head, narrowing his eyes down at the figure. //No…he's your enemy!\\ He snarled to himself, quickly turning and continuing his way along the hall.

Please review. ;] maybe if I get enough reviews there will be several lemons in the next chapter!