A/N – OK guys, again the whole review thing is a bit depressing :( but sure, I'll get over it. :) So here's another chapter. Before anyone points out I do know that the characters are very OCC but it was the way it played out in my mind and it is AU, so expect the unexpected! Not much action, but this chapter had to be included to explain some of the whys and hows and such. Anyway, hope you enjoy! Please review ~silvermoonfae
Disclaimer – I do not own anything remotely related to the fantastic world of J.K Rowling!
Tentative Truce
"Po – Harry. Are you experiencing any pain?" Snape almost stuttered, trying to regain his composure stoically, berating himself silently 'Stupid question. Stupid, stupid question Severus. Of course he is'.
"Professor? Hospital Wing?" Harry tried to ask. Though on the mend, he still had difficulty breathing and couldn't seem to get the right words to form in his mouth.
Snape saw his difficulties and waved his wand silently over the child. "Better?" he asked trying not to completely shatter his whole grumpy dungeon persona he had composed down through the years. Instead he tried to ease off it.
Harry gave a sigh of relief, "Thanks professor, much better!"
"In answer to your previous question, of course you are in the hospital wing. You have healed significantly already, however due to the severity of your injuries, you still have a long way to go,"Snape said quietly, a bit of sadness shining in his black gaze at what the child had gone through.
Harry was barely paying attention, however, for he was totally and utterly amazed. Who would have thought that Snape, of all people, would have a soothing bedside manner. He was quiet and soft (really Snape soft??) but that was the only way he could describe him at the moment. And his silky voice brought an instant calm whilst in his presence. Coming to his senses he finally realised what Snape had said. His eyebrows rose, hiding beneath his messy bangs. "It's alright sir. I've had worse. The pain is insignificant. Nothing more than discomforting, is all." he assured the professor dismissively.
It was Snape's turn for the eyebrow to creep upwards towards his hairline, arching elegantly in disbelief, his awkwardness now forgotten. He was appalled that the child could have fared any worse than he was now at his 'home' and still survive without any medical treatment. And without magical treatment at that! "Harry, if this is merely 'discomforting' as you have described it, I shudder to comprehend the other situations in which you fared worse." he said dryly.
Harry flushed, suddenly aware at what he had implied and not at all happy with his indiscretion. "Uh, yeah, em, nothing really was meant sir – you know – em - exaggeration and all that – uh . ." he stuttered uncomfortably, giving truth to the fact that he was lying by averting his eyes and the slight flush maintained on his face and neck.
"Articulate as ever, Harry", Snape said without a hint of his former sneer or malice. It was almost comprehensible to see Snape without his customary traits and again, Harry was shocked into silence and almost missed the last part of what Snape was saying. ". . .we shall be discussing this as soon as feasible, whether it be with myself, the headmaster or Poppy." he said sternly.
Harry gulped nervously and then it hit him. Snape wanted to help him. Him, Harry Potter, son of his childhood enemy, James Potter, and arrogant Gryffindor Goldenboy? Something was off here. And he was not about to be duped into trusting any sort of adults, no matter their intentions, for the moment. He eyed the professor strangely and suspiciously.
Snape fought not to fidget under the suspicious scrutiny. Had he done something wrong? Said something? He didn't like to admit it but he was nervous. He needed to gain the boys trust for , more than anything he wanted to help him, to get him through this. For though he seemed fairly stable at the moment, he knew it couldn't last, it wouldn't last for that matter. He had dealt with enough abuse cases, though none as severe as this, to know and expect an eventual breakdown.
"Sir, no offence or anything, but what's the deal?" Harry stated bluntly in what Snape had deemed, 'typical Gryffindor brashness'. "You've hated me for years. You've treated me worse than the dirt on the bottom of your shoes. Why the sudden change?"
Snape sighed wearily, merely exhausted at the immense task ahead of him. Again typical Gryffindor to use such crude metaphors. But how to explain it all to him? He now suddenly understood the suspicions of the child. He couldn't expect any semblance of civility between them after their history. He would have to explain. Again he sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose in agitation. 'This was gonna be tough!' "Harry, first of all, I'd like to address the fact that I have NEVER hated you. I disliked you, certainly and I admit for completely the wrong reasons, but a lot of that was to do with my 'loyal death eater' act for the Slytherins and other death eaters. I am more than willing to forgo these unnecessary actions for the summer at least. Secondly, I know what you have gone through. I know what it's is like." He held up an elegant, potion-stained hand to forestall any protest of denial from the boy. "I do Harry," he said emphatically, "from my own experience, and based on various cases within the Slytherin, and indeed the odd few from other houses. However, the Slytherin house receives more, for reasons I know not. But we're not all junior death eaters. Many have suffered somewhat and have less than happy life's. We are a large extended family that can relate to each other and help healing. Therefore, I do know what you are going through." He pause to let that sink in. Harry's eyes had gone as wide as saucers and his mouth opened in a silent 'oh' at such revelations.
"Well that explains a lot," Harry finally whispered.
"What do you mean?" Snape said curiously.
Harry glance at him sideways, a most Slytherin smirk spread across his face, eyes glinting in humour. Snape had to look twice, not believing the expression on the epitome of Gryfindor's face. "Well.." Harry began "the sorting hat was quite adamant to place me in Slytherin" he said nonchalantly. He smirked again as Snape's face dropped in disbelief and denial. "I of course argued ferociously with it to place me anywhere but there."
"That indeed explains a lot."Snape faintly. Harry enjoyed shocking the usually guarded Snape. But then he remembered the seriousness of the conversation and his face dropped back into a familiar tense and worried look.
Snape recovered, though his brain still hadn't fully understood the implications of that, he would think of it later. Now he watched Harry deep in thought, sadness permeating every line on his face. He suppressed another sigh. Really the boy was like an open book. Emotions played out constantly across his face, though sadness was still the prevailing emotion. He mentally put Occlumency on his 'to-do list' to help Harry. It was said that the eyes were the windows to your soul. Staring into Harry's eyes, one could easily believe that. Disbelief, sadness, fear, wariness and finally the tiniest hint of hope, flashed in them. Such tentative hope, as if he expected it to be shattered at a moments notice, which is probably true, from the little he could glean from Harry's 'relatives' behaviour.
"Sir, I don't mean to sound ungrateful and all, you did save me from . . . from 'that place' after all," he stammered averting his gaze. 'Yes' Snape thought ' a talk would be needed soon about 'that place' as Harry so eloquently put it.' "But as much as I would like to believe you, in you, I just . . . just cant. Even if it weren't for our . . . " he paused almost fearfully " . . .history!" he finished. Harry was tense, eyes clenched, fists closed, waiting for the expectant hand on flesh, more specifically his flesh. He was shivering slightly. He couldn't trust anybody, nobody at all. He was alone, by himself, in both worlds. It was all he knew.
Snape's heart clenched at the sight Harry had been reduced to. Expecting to be hit. It was heartbreaking to see such an ingrained reaction in the boy and finally, in an all-shattering blow, the ice that encased his heart fell away, by the very picture of destroyed innocence Harry presented. As much as he wanted to comfort the child, he knew he couldn't. Such a move could be misconstrued whilst Harry was in such a state of mind. He had to rely on conveying his intentions through his emotions and words, no matter how uncomfortably he felt.
"Harry," he called softly, interlocking his fingers in hope he wouldn't inadvertently move to the child. "Child, look at me, please!" Perhaps it was the shock of hearing the man almost beg, but Harry tentatively raised his eyes to Snape's obsidian gaze, at which he flinched at the intensity of it. Immediately, Snape softened it perceptively, "Harry, I need to firstly impress upon you that I, and everyone here, will NEVER hit you or hurt you in anger or pleasure or any other emotion for that fact. You will certainly know if we are angry, but we will never raise our hand to a child. EVER!" There was still a suspicious glint in the boy's own eyes but it had lessened noticeably with his statement. Pleased at that minute victory, Snape continued, "Secondly, I don't expect you to trust us straight away. We should of seen what you have been enduring years ago. We didn't and I know nothing can compensate for that oversight. And now, in hindsight, I see that you have never really trusted any of us here, adult or student alike. I just ask that you give us all a chance to help you."
"I don't need help!" Harry cut in sharply. He felt trapped. For years no one had noticed anything, not a hint. And all of a sudden, it's out, the secret he had been harbouring for as long as he could remember had been discovered, by means out of his control. Control! He craved it and suddenly his grip on his own life was spiralling out of his hands. It was a reflex reaction after never having anyone to rely on but himself. He felt overcrowded and trapped and he lashed out like a cornered animal. And Snape understood this. "I've proven myself perfectly capable for years now. It's nothing I can't handle now." Harry snapped angrily.
Snape jumped in after that, "But you should not have had to have fended for yourself. It was not your responsibility as a child and one you have been carrying the burden of for long enough, under secrecy on top of all that. Therefore, let us help! Share the burden, for it was one you were never meant to carry. Let us help you get your life back in YOUR control." He received a sharp look from the boy at this declaration, the anger slowly dissolving. "Yes," Snape nodded "in YOUR control! I'm not asking for complete unwavering trust. I'm just asking, no begging, for a truce. A truce between me and you and between all the adults who wish to help. A second chance, if you must. But don't lock us out, for surely it will destroy you and you've come too far for that!"At this stage Snape couldn't help the pleading tone that his voice took in his impassioned declaration to vilify himself to Harry.
Harry heard the tone, the pleading expression evident in his voice, the sadness inherent in his face and the promise in his eyes. And it was that, that finally convinced Harry to maybe accede to such an offer. He knew deep down that he needed help, even if he didn't want to admit it to himself. And he knew that he would never survive another year under the pretence and expectations everyone placed upon him with all his now mounting problems. He knew he needed help and the at it was most likely going to involve the adults, therefore, perhaps a truce was the best course of action. Slowly he nodded his head in acquiescence and heard Snape sigh thankfully.
The small desperate flicker of hope in Harry's eyes filled Snape with relief. Maybe there could be salvation for Harry in the dire situations in which he was placed in. However, the wariness and suspicion was still evident, but someday he hoped to erase such emotions that had no place in a child's repertoire. However, he had somewhere small to start now and he knew he would have some sort of co-operation and effort on Harry's part now.
"A truce then." Harry whispered dejectedly, head bowed, as if he were afraid to relinquish his trust even that much. But slowly and determinedly he raised his head to stare directly in to Snape's eyes as if to impress the importance of his decision. "But, you all only get one second chance. The truce is fragile and liable to be broken the instant your betray my trust. This I swear, for I shall never again look to you, any of you, if such an occurrence should happen. I will pack it all in and depart the Wizarding world, to leave you to your enemy." He spoke strongly and vehemently, promised echoing in his voice.
Snape inclined his head in acceptance, and barely contained a shiver at the almost prophetic words. He knew that Harry meant them with all his soul. "Terms such as that are more than acceptable, Mr. Potter, given what you have endured," he agreed formally. Then softening slightly he whispered, "I'm glad you have given us a chance, Harry. You deserve a happy, normal life after this and I promise to do all that is in my power to give you that. You wont regret it!" And with that he rose to head back to his dungeons to rest after such emotional conversation. He could tell the child was tiring already as well and the child needed to heal. Just as he reached the door, a soft whisper floated across the room, from the only other occupant that it held.
"I hope so too. I really, really do!"
His heart tore at the pure despair and sadness in that one small statement, that revealed more than anything that he wasn't The-Boy-Lived but just Harry, a young child who has been through the wars and by rights should have already broken, and yet is still tethering on the edge hoping for salvation before having to take the plunge into the darkness. He knew their truce was a tentative one, but he would do everything to solidify the small faith the child had put in their hands. He, Severus Snape, had shattered the walls that shielded his heart from emotion and he vowed to save the small boy, who had so little to give that was precious to give and yet he gave it to them. His trust was something he would not destroy, and would be kept safe and secure, under virtual lock and key, with him. He, Severus Snape, had become a staunch protector of Harry Potter, not the son of James Potter anymore, but the small, scared, abused boy.
Please please (puppy dog eyes) please review! (Think this will work?? play to their emotional sides?? lol)
