I'm Glad that you can forgive, Only hoping that as time goes, you can forget... -Brand New

The light shone through the dusty window causing the girl to stir in her sleep. Spot watched from the opposite bed hoping that she'd wake up. She's been sleeping for a day and half and he was beginning to get worried. Her breath was steady and he watched her chest rise and fall in a fixed rhythm. He was beyond exhausted. The past few weeks had done nothing but push him to his limits, both physically and emotionally but he was terrified to fall asleep. Terrified that the moment he did, she would wake up and leave him. He couldn't face that. He knew how she acted when she was scared. There was too much that was left unsaid between the two of them.

He heard her move suddenly, the rustling of the thin blanket making the noise, and he watched her slowly open her eyes, blinking rapidly as they adjusted the sunlight. She sighed heavily and looked around that room. Noticing him sitting opposite her she gave him a slight smile.

"Hi," she said, her voice hoarse from lack of use.

"Hi," he replied back returning the slight smile she had given him.

She shifted in the bed and positioned herself so that she was now on her back, her head propped up on her pillow. She was staring up at the ceiling.

"What time is it?"

"Early morning. The boys left a little while ago. How are you feeling?"

She rolled over onto her side and stared at him. "I'm tired, exhausted really."

He snorted in response.

"What?' She asked him with a hint of laughter in her voice replacing the hoarseness.

"Well, you've been asleep for almost two days."

There was no reply from her, and awkwardness suddenly entered the room.

The pair sat in silence just staring at each other. Neither knowing where to really begin the conversation. Spot spoke first.

"I think that we need to talk."

Lanie stared at him for a moment before nodding her head in agreement. Spot rose from the bed and walked over to the small dresser in the room and pulled some clothes out of it and placed them gently on the end of the bed.

"You should get dressed." Lanie looked at him confused before realizing that she was wearing nothing but her dress slip and she blushed.

"Did you...?" she started to question. Wondering how she had gotten out of the soaking wet clothes that she remembered wearing, the ones that she had walked home in.

Spot shook his head, "No, Gunther's girl undressed you. That's her slip your wearing. Those clothes," he pointed to the ones he had just placed at the bottom of the bed. "Those are hers. She brought them over you."

Lanie nodded in acknowledgment. Sport continued.

"I'll let you get dressed, just come out when you're ready and we'll go get something to eat."

She nodded again, and Spot left without saying another word.

Slowly, she sat up and took in her surroundings. She knew she was in her bedroom at the boarding house, but she couldn't remember how she'd gotten there. Racking her memory, she let it take her as far back as she could. She remembered talking to Gunther, leaving for the bar, standing in the rain... Embarrassment flooded her. The things she had done and said. The things Spot had said to her.

"How I am gonna get myself outta this one?" She thought to herself. Scenarios played in her head. Fake conversations that she felt could lead anywhere. Deep thoughts, desires, things she knew she needed to tell him but was scared too.

She laid back down in bed, letting these thoughts consume her. After awhile, there was a knock on the door.

"You okay Gem?" Spot called though the door.

She quickly got out of bed and reached for the clothes he had given her. "Yea, I'll be out in a minute."

She quickly got dressed and stepped out of the room, fixing the skirt around the waist as she did.

Spot was leaning against the wall, and nodded to her, "Ready?"

"Yea, let's go."

The pair set out from the boarding house and towards the nearest bakery. Spot purchased a roll for her, nothing for himself.

"You're not hungry? She asked him, taking the roll from his outstretched hand.

He just shook his head. "Let's go find someplace to talk." He walked ahead of her, and she stayed a few steps behind him, wondering why he felt so distant all of a sudden.

They walked on for a few minutes, until Spot stopped at a bench leading into the entrance of a small park. He sat down, and she followed suit.

They sat in silence. Neither one sure what to say to the other. Finally, after a few moments, Spot cleared his throat. Lanie looked over at him but he continued to look straight ahead.

"I'm sorry."

"For what?" The girl replied

"For this mess. For bringing you here, and for locking you up, and for...," he paused for a moment, not really knowing how to continue, which words would sound best. "I guess I'm sorry for everything.." He finally looked over at her. Their eyes connected. Lanie saw the pain, and sadness that had engulfed them. The honesty of what he was telling her. Silence once again fell over them, and Spot broke the connection that she was desperately trying to hold onto.

Spot took a deep breath before he continued. "Do you know why we call you Gemstone? How that became your nickname?"

Lanie looked over at him puzzled. "What does that have to do..."

"We called you Gemstone because that's what you are. You're a gem. A diamond in the rough. When you came here, when we all first met you, you were so lost and confused, and sad. You clamed up, you were shy around us, you didn't let anyone see who you really were. Then little by little you would smile, or tell a joke... You let us see who you really were. You were a Gem, a rarity around here. That's why we called you that. That's how you got your nickname."

He turned to look at her and a smirk on his face. She stared back in surprise. She never knew how she'd gotten the name. Spot continued.

"Your sister, got her nickname because, and this is going to sound awful, because she was the complete opposite of you. A daisy, you can find anywhere. Their pretty, but there everywhere." He snorted just then, as though a thought had just hit him. "I think these are probably the most carefully thought out nicknames ever."

Lanie nodded, but not really in understanding. "I still don't understand..."

"That night... the night Lissy died, I always said I didn't have a choice. That I could only save one of you. But I've replayed that night a million times in my head, and the truth is, I did have a choice. I could have saved both of you..." He looked over at Lanie, to see her reaction. He stared his, emotionless, one single tear fell down her cheek. He reached up to wipe it away but she slapped his hand. She made to stand up, wanting nothing more at that point but to get away from him. He grabbed her arm before she could move, and pulled her back to him.

"Please, just listen to what I have to say, then you can do what you want," he pleaded with her. She looked away from him, and when she didn't say anything, he took that as a sign to continue. I had been expecting this from her, knowing full well, that after everything they had been through together, that this would probably be the last time he would talk her. He needed her to know the truth though. Now, able to look up at her, and see her face, he continued.

"Like I was saying. I had a choice, I could have saved both of you. But in that moment, all I could see was you, hurt, dying, and scared. I needed to save you first because, and I hate to admit this, you were, and still are the most important person in my life. I needed you more than I needed Lissy. So I saved you first, I made sure that you were okay first. I thought I had more time to save her. I thought that she would be okay. Obviously, I thought wrong"

He stopped here and took a deep breath. He took her hand in his and she looked down at him, tears still in her eyes.

"Lanie, if I could go back and re-do everything that I did that night, I would not do anything differently. I need you to know that. I believe that I made the best decision. I just needed you to hear that." He stopped talking and continued to stare at her.

"Is that all Conlon?" She asked him, her voice low and cold, and eerily calm.

"Yea, that's all. Like I said, I needed you to know that."

She shook her head and suddenly, with anger she yanked her hand out of his, and slapped him across the face.

He continued to stare at her. Knowing that he fully deserved this treatment.

"Spot, I'm going to walk away because honestly, being three inches away from you makes me want to kill you. I thought, that I had finally been able to let go of the past. Accept what happened. But this, this confession, after years and years of saying the opposite. That's something I can't deal with right now. So, I need you not to follow me, and just let me go. Don't come looking for me. I need you to just leave me alone. Forever, for the rest of my life."

With that, she turned and walked away, and for the second time, Spot watched her walk out of his life.

Author's Note: So yea, it has been like three, closer to four years since I updated this story. A lot has happened since then. I was on my computer the other day and was deleting some of my old files when I came across this story. After reading it, I (hopefully) decided to finish it. This chapter, I guess is just a way for me to get back into the swing of things. Anywhoo, thanks to everybody (or anybody) who read this when I was updating. I appreciate it! See you in the next chapter (hopefully) :)