AN: Holy… It's been like, two months since I last updated. O_O' Um… sorry about that…
But, it's the summer! 8D No more stupid school! YAY! So, because I'm feeling happy and generous, free cookies for all that review! :D
Disclaimer: I don't own One Piece, that's all there's for me to say. *Zoro walks over*
Zoro: Hey, you seen the girl who wrote this thing? Apparently she's called 'silverstar94.'
SS: *blinks* Huh?
Zoro: You know; the one that comes up with all the crap ideas to torture me in this story.
SS: Oh, well…
Zoro: *scowls* That bitch took my katana and hid them. *evil glare into space*
SS: …
Zoro: You know her?
SS: *innocent smile* No! Not at all! *shuffles away*
Chapter 12 - Missing katana
'Intense math revision in progress: Do not disturb.'
After hanging up her sign on her bedroom door, Lynn sneaked down stairs quietly, careful not to alert her parents in their bedroom. She grabbed an apple - her breakfast - off the dinner table and slipped out of the house into the morning sunlight. She was nervous as she made her way over to the hotel in which the Straw Hat crew were staying; she didn't really want to have to face Zoro's wrath. She crunched on her apple as Zoro's angry facial expression popped into mind, and shuddered. Scary…
"I've been waiting for you." Nami stood at the hotel door with her arms crossed as she watched Lynn approach cautiously.
"…Is Zoro around?"
"He's upstairs in his room, stressing out."
"Oh…"
"It's all your fault you know," accused Nami. "He didn't sleep at all last night. Too busy circling his room, cursing your ass off. He kept me up half the night, too, with all that shuffling around."
Lynn grimaced.
"Speaking of last night…" Nami raised an eyebrow. "Why on earth didn't you stop those idiots from breaking the hotel bed?"
"Err… It wasn't like I could…"
Nami sighed.
"Um, you didn't have to compensate for it, did you?" Lynn shuffled on her feet uneasily.
"No. If we did, I wouldn't be standing here, talking to you would I?" Nami smiled 'sweetly.' Lynn sweat dropped.
'No, she wouldn't,' Lynn realised. 'She'd be strangling me.'
"But, it wasn't like we got away with it either," said Nami. "Sanji-kun and Zoro now have a part time job."
"Eh?" Lynn blinked. "What happened?"
Nami smirked thoughtfully. "Well…"
(Flashback)
Zoro took the knife from Usopp's bag and, with great concentration, slit the mattress in two in one hasty swipe.
"All done," said Zoro, tossing the knife back at Usopp who had sat up from the ground. It landed beside his leg, blade down, digging deep into the carpeted floor of the hotel corridor. Usopp shrieked in shock and jumped away from the knife, with his eyes wide and alert. "ZORO! ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL ME?"
Everyone ignored him.
"See? Now you two don't have to argue anymore!" declared Luffy cheerfully.
"WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?"
Everyone turned to the source of the shocked and heated cry. Nami stood at the doorway, looking quite traumatized.
"What did you do to the bed?" she screamed.
"They halved it," answered Luffy and received a bash on the head.
"I can see that, idiot!" Nami glared at Zoro and a swooning Sanji. "What were you two idiots thinking?"
"If you thought I would spend a night with that asshole on that bed, go knock some sense into yourself," Zoro sneered.
"I'll knock some sense into you!" yelled Sanji. "How dare you talk to Nami-san like that?"
Yeah, and thus yet another fight commenced between the two.
"I'm hungry," announced Luffy randomly. "Let's have some dinner."
Nami sighed heavily. "This world is filled with hopeless idiots…"
"WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?"
Everyone turned and in the corridor stood a pudgy, middle aged man, carrying the same expression as Nami had moments ago; except he looked a bit angrier…
"I demand to know what you youngsters are doing to hotel property!" he shouted.
"…And, you are?" questioned Zoro, with a raised eyebrow.
"What's the matter, manager?" shouted a young man wearing hotel uniform, running down the corridor to the commotion. "Did you find out what all the noise was?" He stopped when he arrived, and his jaw dropped to the floor. Almost literally.
"Manager?" Nami grimaced. "Oh crap…"
Zoro sighed and explained the situation to the furious manager. "See, that crazy orange haired woman over there made a gamble with her friend and stuck me and that shit head—" Sanji scowled. "—in the same room against our wish, so it's all her fault, really. Just because she's a treasure hungry bi-"
Nami bashed him over the head and he crumpled to the floor. Sighing, she then pinched the bridge of her nose and thought for second before continuing.
"Look, I know we were wrong, so… we'll… compensate."
The Straw Hats stared at her, unable to believe what they were hearing. Like hell their greedy navigator would actually own up and propose to compensate! Either this girl wasn't Nami, or sanity no longer exists.
A cheeky smiled stretched over Nami's face and she flicked a thumb at Zoro and Sanji who stood behind her. "These guys can work for free here at the hotel until they pay off their debt!"
Should have seen it coming, really. Zoro slapped his forehead in exasperation, but Sanji was just over the moon to know he could please his dear Nami.
"See, both of them are insanely strong, and Sanji here is also a first class cook," continued Nami, and Sanji wiggled his body at the compliment. The manager looked at the two men thoughtfully. A cook… having a cook that required no wages was indeed a handy thing… and that bulky green-haired guy looked like he could be the perfect security guard for scaring off any scoundrels…
"Deal," smiled the manager, shaking hands with Nami.
(End of flashback)
"And, that's pretty much how it happened." Nami smiled.
Lynn rolled her eyes at the fact Nami had made a deal out of her friends, but didn't say anything. After all, Lynn did almost cause the death of Luffy a while ago when she chucked him on a date into a swimming pool with that crazy Jess.
"Never mind that," said Lynn. "We need to get a move on if we want to sort out this money business at the bank. I'm sneaking out, you know."
"Yes, I know," said Nami. "But before we do anything, don't you think you should go apologise to Zoro first? You're the one that lost his katana, and you should know how precious those are to him."
"B-but I'm pretty certain I can get them back though," said Lynn with fake confidence. "It's not like they'll be destroyed if they're found. They're probably just… um… lurking about… somewhere… in the country."
"Lurking somewhere in the country." Nami rolled her eyes. "That's a great reassurance. Go tell that to Zoro."
Lynn's expression was one mixed between panic and dread. "D-do I have to?"
"Yes," Nami persisted, shoving Lynn towards the entrance of the hotel. "You do."
In the room of number 44, a certain green-haired swordsman sat on the ground bare-chested (here's some fan-service left for your imagination ;P), grumbling to himself, lifting and dropping his half of the bed with one hand as if it was a weight. A good morning work-out usually helped him to relieve stress. But the creaking of wood and the swordsman's mumbling was an inconvenient disturbance to the soundly sleeping cook on the other side of the room. Finally, unable to stand it any longer, Sanji sat up with a grunt.
"Keep it down!" he groaned. "It's still early; some people are trying to sleep!"
"Shut it," came a simple response.
"Irritated much?" Sanji raised an eyebrow. Zoro cursed something along the lines of agreement and Sanji sighed, complaining, "Well, please be irritated in silence."
"Bastard," muttered Zoro to himself. "It's not my fault the little shrimpy bitch went and lost my katana…"
"Lynn-chan lost your katana?" Sanji jerked up and stared at Zoro wide eyed, overhearing his mumbling.
An awkward silence fell over them for a moment; but Sanji broke it by bursting out in laughter.
"HAHA!" he hooted. "Nice one, Lynn-chan! I hope someone finds them and melts them into a spatula!"
"I'LL KILL YOU!" With a roar, Zoro dropped his 'weight' and threw himself at the unprepared cook, sending them both tumbling to the ground. Without the aid of his katana, he could only think to use his hands. Forgetting the fact that he only wore a pair of shorts, Zoro heaved himself on top of Sanji, trying to strangle him.
And Lynn chose this perfect time to walk into the room.
"Look, Zoro, I'm sorry for… OH GOD!" Lynn stumbled, taken aback. Both men on the floor looked up. "WOAH!" Lynn quickly slapped a hand over her eyes and edged out of the room repeating loudly, "I didn't see anything… I didn't see anything… I didn't see ANYTHING!"
Zoro opened his mouth to yell at her, but Sanji beat him to it.
"Wait! Lynn-chan!" Sanji struggled under Zoro's massive weight. "GET OFF ME, YOU GODDAMN MARIMO!" With a grunt, he kicked hard upwards and sent the swordsman flying across the room. Then Sanji leapt up and ran after Lynn, leaving Zoro cursing and swearing as he crashed in a heap, head over heels against the wall.
"Have you apologised?" Nami raised an eyebrow as Lynn towards her from the stairs, looking rather disturbed.
"I think I just saw something I shouldn't have…"
"…Huh?" Nami uttered, confused.
"Lynn-chwan~!" cried Sanji as he pranced after Lynn. "It was a misunderstanding! A HUGE misunderstanding!"
"Yeah, okay," agreed Lynn, though her expression clearly expressed she wasn't convinced.
"Right… What happened?" Nami rolled her eyes.
"Maybe those yaoi fan-girls weren't all that crazy after all…" Lynn muttered to herself thoughtfully.
"What?"
"Never mind," said Lynn, ignoring Sanji who was still trying to protest about the misunderstanding. "I apologized, sort of, so can we go to the bank now?"
"Yeah, sure," said Nami. "Let's—"
"What's going on?" asked a curious voice suddenly. Everyone turned to see Luffy poking his head out from some double doors on the other side of the reception area. Isn't that… the hotel canteen? Luffy flinched when he noticed Sanji standing there, too, and tried to duck back into the canteen. It was no use, though.
"Luffy!" yelled Sanji, sending a flying kick at the rubber boy. "You bastard, that's the third time in twelve hours I've caught you in there! Scoff any more hotel food and I'll sell you to pay off our debt!"
"Dang!" cried Luffy, dodging Sanji's attack. "Caught again!"
They chased around in random circles whilst the girls sweat dropped.
"Um, okay… Should we leave them be, then?" Lynn asked.
Nami merely shrugged.
"OI! YOU!"
Lynn turned in horror to see Zoro stomping over to her from the stairs, a dark aura rising off his body. "I have a bone to pick with you…"
"I'm sorry-yy-yyy!" screamed Lynn, running off for her life before Zoro could begin to (possibly) attack.
"LYNN!" yelled Nami. "Come back here!"
Lynn didn't listen, and she was surprisingly fast at running.
"Luffy, grab her," commanded Nami, catching hold of him just as he ran past. Sanji stopped chasing and although glaring at him, waited for Luffy to complete Nami's order.
The rubber boy pulled back his right arm dutifully and shot it out, slinging it around Lynn's waist and reeling her in. She flew back and knocked both of them over.
"Ow!" Lynn complained. "What was that for?"
Nami whacked her one when as Lynn sat up from the ground. "Lynn, if you run off like that, how do you expect to get anything done today?" she demanded.
"Being hunted by a potential mass murderer is scarier than it seems!" Lynn grumbled, rubbed the lump on her head, and peeked at the swordsman, feeling abnormally intimidated.
Nami sighed as Lynn shuffled away from Zoro and hid behind a swooning Sanji. "Look, let's sort this out. You can get his katana back for sure, right?"
Lynn hesitated.
"Right!" Nami demanded.
"R-right."
Nami then turned to Zoro and said, "You heard me, yeah? If you want your katana back then you can't kill her. Oh, and you cannot run off on your own, either. Direction clueless as you are, running off can only mean pointless trouble. Got that?"
Zoro grumbled agreement reluctantly.
"Do you promise?" Nami insisted.
"Yeah, whatever."
"Do you?"
"I do," he said, rolling his eyes.
"And, do you promise to get his katana back?" Nami demanded of Lynn.
"I do…" said Lynn with only a hint of confidence.
"See? Now wasn't that easy?" said Nami.
"What is this, a wedding ceremony?" asked a confused Usopp, emerging from the stairs, only to be attacked by the glares Zoro and Lynn gave him.
"NO, YOU IDIOT!" they shouted.
Nami ignored the commotion and announced, "Okay. This goes for all of us; money comes first, so Lynn and I will go to the bank quickly, and then search for Zoro's katana afterwards. Deal?"
Did they have any choice but to agree?
Sanji whistled to himself as he peeled potatoes at a work top in the hotel kitchen. The large room was bustling at the moment as the hotel cooks rushed around to prepare breakfast buffets. Zoro stood at the side of the work top, bored as hell and nearly falling asleep. Nami and Lynn had been out for almost two hours now, and before leaving, they had left Sanji in charge of making sure Zoro was within sight at all times. Sanji, despite wanting nothing to do with the marimo, agreed to whatever the ladies wanted. Stupid, no?
Zoro slumped slightly, nearing the gas cookers. On feeling a burning sensation on the back of his neck, the swordsman jumped and knocked over a few pots of porridge whilst he was at it.
"YOU IDIOT!" bellowed Sanji as other cooks began to look over to see what the noise was. "You've ruined them!"
Instantly, Sanji raised his leg and brought it down on Zoro, aiming for his head; and on instinct, Zoro grabbed the nearest katana-like things and defended himself.
There was a rather awkward silence as everyone stared at Sanji and Zoro, one trying to attack and the other blocking the fierce kick with twin long baguettes held in a cross shape. Sanji's eyes widened as he saw his own shoe prints in the middle of two beautifully baked baguettes, and without a second thought, kicked Zoro out of the kitchen, shouting, "Go to hell!"
Outside, Zoro grumbled and cursed, but then paused and wondered aloud, "Does this mean I'm free to go?"
"That certainly took longer than I thought," whined Lynn as she and Nami walked back to the hotel from their trip to the bank.
Nami just grinned to herself, rubbing her new credit card against her cheek in happiness, purring like a kitten. "I'm rich," she squealed joyfully. "And Lynn owes me 100,000 berries!"
Lynn grumbled to herself in discontent. Her savings were no were near enough to pay off that stupid debt, so now she was stuck under Nami-harassment for payment. Just like Zoro. Great…
The girls, after arriving back at the hotel, went straight to the kitchen to see how Sanji and Zoro were doing. Nami poked her head through the doors and said to Sanji, "Hey, we're back!"
"NAMI-SWAAAN!" grinned Sanji, sweeping outside to greet her like a mini whirlwind. "Oh, how I missed you, my dear! Ah! And, Lynn-chan, too!" he added gleefully when he noticed Lynn.
The girls ignored him (as usual), and Nami raised her eyebrows when she couldn't see Zoro anywhere. "Um… Where's Zoro?"
"The marimo?" Sanji blinked, scanned the area, and his face fell. "Oh, shit…"
"Now if I were katana, where would I hide?"
Zoro was wandering the street, looking around. Surely his friends had told him many times that he wasn't to run off on his own, but how else was he supposed to find his katana? Zoro wasn't prepared to let his treasured katana go missing. Especially not Wado Ichimonji. Kuina's face flashed in his mind and he clenched his fists in determination that he wasn't about to let her dream die. Despite being convinced by Nami that Lynn could definitely get them back, he wasn't willing to rely on that girl entirely.
Zoro stopped as he noticed something that caught his attention. There was an old man not far away, picking up litter and bottles from the streets and putting them in a huge bin bag he carried. Zoro thought the man might know some helpful information, so he decided to go and ask.
"Excuse me," said Zoro, approaching the old man, "can you help me with something?"
The old man frowned. "Help? No, I'm fine, thanks. I don't need help."
"Um, no. I said, can you help me."
"What? Speak a little louder, please! My hearing isn't so great."
Zoro raised his voice a bit and said, "Have you seen any katana lying around?"
"Cats? No. No cats here."
Zoro sweat dropped. "No, I said 'katana'. Ka-ta-na."
The old man strained his ears to listen. "Ka-what?"
"Katana! A metal, bladed weapon!"
"Mantle?"
"Metal."
"Mental?"
Zoro was thoroughly exasperated now. "Metal! Emm-ee-tee-ay-el. Metal!"
"Oh, metal! Well, why didn't you just say so?" The old man pointed to a large, green plastic container at the side of the street. "Someone might have put it in there."
"What's that?" asked Zoro, frowning.
"A hat? It's something that you wear on your head."
Zoro felt like banging his head on a brick wall. "No, not a hat! I said, What's— You know what, never mind." With that, Zoro headed over to the mysterious box to investigate himself, leaving the old man quite confused.
"Recycling?" Zoro frowned, reading off the side of the green box as he approached. He hadn't a clue what the heck that meant. The box was peculiar; it was split into a few sections, each with a large hole in their respective lids. There were words written on each also: glass, plastic, paper, and metal.
Metal! That's what he was looking for!
Without a second thought, he pried off the lid, which had been bolted shut, and stuck the top half of his body into the box for a rummage.
At this minute, perhaps by pure bad luck, a few teenage chavs happened to walk by and, seeing a random butt sticking out of a recycling bin, burst out laughing. Thinking it would be funny, they then grabbed Zoro's legs without a warning and tipped him in. He landed with a crash as the chavs sat on the lid so he couldn't get out.
"OI!" Zoro shouted furiously, banging on the sides. "What the hell do you think you're doing?"
The bin rattled and shook with Zoro's struggling, so much that it slightly unnerved the teens. Finally, thoroughly irritated, Zoro punched upwards hard and slammed open the lid, sending the boy sitting on it flying and leaving a huge, dented fist mark on the hard plastic.
"What was that for?" demanded Zoro, glaring at the remaining teens. They flinched and then scattered in terror. "Oi, wait!" yelled Zoro, grabbing one of them before they could escape. "Tell me this: what happens to katana if they're left in the middle of the street?"
Panicking, the chav, having a limited weaponry vocabulary, didn't really understand what Zoro was implying by 'katana', so just answered, "I-I don't know, w-whatever they are, if they're l-l-left lying around, the garbage truck could have p-picked them up!"
"Garbage truck?"
The chav nodded and Zoro let him go. 'Garbage truck,' thought Zoro with a frown. 'What's that?'
"OHMIGOD!"
Zoro turned sharply to the source of the voice and saw a blonde teen girl standing on the other side of the road, gawking at him.
"It's the super hot dude from the swimming pool!" she declared excitedly. "And, he just beat up that bunch of chavs!"
Zoro's blood ran cold, remembering his fan-club from back then.
"Really?" chorused a load of girls' voices, and suddenly that blonde girl was surrounded by a whole mob that appeared out of nowhere.
"What the hell!" cried Zoro, scampering away.
"WAIT! WE LOVE YOOUU!" screamed the girls, beginning to give chase.
"I'm not even sorry for losing his katana anymore!" exclaimed Lynn, frustrated after searching all over the place for the swordsman. After they discovered that Zoro had run off, Nami, Lynn, Luffy, and Usopp had set out to look for him. Sanji, after receiving a good scolding from Nami for losing track of Zoro, stayed at the hotel because he had to work; but not that he cared much about the marimo's whereabouts, anyway.
"Where could he have gone?" scowled Nami.
"I bet I could suggest a good hundred places…" Lynn murmured gloomily.
"Right, name the first destination, and we'll try them in turn."
Lynn blinked and her eyes widened in horror. "You're kidding me." She looked at Nami's irritated yet totally serious expression and sighed, muttering darkly, "Thank you for ruining a perfectly good Saturday, Roronoa Asshole Zoro."
Zoro peeked out of his hiding spot to see if he had lost his crazy fans. He hadn't. They still wandered up and down the street, certain that Zoro was around. Looked like he couldn't come out just yet. Might as well stay in here for the time being, he figured.
He ducked into the garbage truck's back again and sighed.
A loud rattling and lots of machine grinding noises caused Zoro to jerk up with a start. Except he couldn't jerk up; he was being crushed by a load of… god-knows-what. He couldn't even see in the darkness that surrounded him. His senses rushed back to him as a dreadful stench pierced his nostrils and made him grimace in disgust.
What the hell was happening? He couldn't quite grasp what was going on; all he knew was he wasn't in a good situation.
Something heavy knocked him on the head and he tried to curse, but was thrown off his feet by a sudden tilting of the ground he was standing on.
A burst of light blinded him for a second as some sort of gate opened not far ahead. He didn't have to analyse what it was before he felt himself sliding speedily towards it.
BOOF.
Zoro landed with a crash into a soft mushy mess and groaned.
"What the hell is…" his eyes widened as he stared at the sight around him. "…GOING ON?"
He was sitting on a pile of rotting rubbish and surrounded by similar mountains of garbage.
"What is this?" he questioned in disgust as he pulled banana peels and other crap from his short hair.
"What the… Someone fell out of the truck!" a voice called.
Zoro lifted his head and saw the startled truck driver sticking his head out of his window and gawking.
Oh. That was it. Zoro remembered now. He was trying to escape from his fan club when he noticed a huge machine with wheels that stood at the side of the street, and noticing the word 'garbage' painted on the side of it, thought that maybe this was the 'garbage truck' that chav had been talking about. If so then maybe this truck could take him to his katana.
Since he was searching for a place to hide, anyway, he decided to hide himself in the back of the truck. And his fans took quite a while to go away, so maybe he accidentally fell asleep for a little while…
Crap. That would be why he found himself in a rubbish dump then, but since he was here anyway, he might as well look for his katana. He trekked through knee-high loads of garbage and began his search.
A good half hour ploughing through garbage later, Zoro poked his head out, shaking gloop from his hair.
"This is going to take forever," he growled irritably. "What is with these mountains of junk?"
From a small distance away, the truck driver, whom Zoro had completely ignored, had gathered his fellows and were all discussing why on earth that green-haired young man who had fallen out of the back of the truck appeared to be perfectly fine and was ignoring them whilst searching for something. Yes, they were quite bewildered.
They continued to stare as Zoro got tired of plunging through garbage and made his way over to a row of garbage trucks. He only disappeared from their sight for a minute or two, but in that short amount of time, managed to do something dreadful. The men watched in horror as the trucks went toppling over, knocking each other down like dominos and bursting into an explosion of flames as they connected with the ground; perhaps because their oil tanks had all started 'mysteriously' leaking.
"Oops," said Zoro, scratching the back of his neck, standing behind the chaotic scene.
He got chased by more-than-furious garbage men out of the landfill site before you could say, 'don't blow up garbage trucks.'
What a fabulous day Zoro was having. He now walked down an unfamiliar street. Having finally lost the gang of mad garbage men demanding compensation, clothes covered in crap remnants and stinking like hell, all he did was gain bewildered and disgusted looks from passersby's. Still. He wasn't about to give up his search for his katana. Despite the fact he had no clue where he was nor where to go. But, well, something was bound to come across his attention that would aid his search, he figured.
And, surprisingly, he was right.
Zoro noticed a peculiar sign. 'School of Martial arts,' was what it read. 'So… is that like a dojo?' thought Zoro. If so, then maybe they would have some clues as to where his katana might be. With a nod, Zoro stepped inside the doors. The first thing he noticed was the reception area, similar to what was back at the hotel. Strange.
"Can I help you?" asked the girl sitting at the reception table, holding her nose and giving Zoro a funny look.
"Yeah. Do you know where I can go to find a lost katana?"
The girl blinked. "Katana?"
Zoro sighed. "Never mind. Where can I speak to the person in charge?"
"He's teaching," the girl replied. "Just down the corridor around the corner."
Zoro muttered a word of thanks and went to search, but this is Zoro we're talking about, so he got lost within two seconds.
"Okay… This doesn't look right…" Zoro scratched his head and stared at the dead end he had come to. Turning around, he went back the way he came, but stopped as he arrived at a door. "Maybe the girl meant here," he said thoughtfully, pushing at the door. It didn't open. "Damn, it's jammed," Zoro grunted, shoving harder. Finally, annoyed, he rammed his shoulder against the wood door, and with a CRASH, it gave and went slamming against…
"Yow!" yelped a voice from the other side, followed by a thud as something fell to the floor.
Zoro grimaced. That couldn't be good. He peeked in and saw a man inside, passed out on the ground. He looked past the man and saw a toilet further in the small room. Oh, so this place was a bathroom… He had thought it might be a training room…
"LOOK!" shouted a childish voice from behind Zoro. Zoro turned, and there stood a little boy, no older than eight years old, pointing and gawking at him and the unconscious man inside the toilet. A few more kids his age lingered about him curiously; it seemed he was like the 'leader' of the bunch. "What have you done to our teacher?" the leader kid demanded.
"It was an accident," said Zoro. "I thought the door was jammed."
"What did our poor teacher ever do to you?" the leader kid continued, ignoring Zoro's explanation. "He taught us great karate, and he just popped to the toilet for a second, and you go and murder him!"
"He's not dead." Zoro rolled his eyes.
The boy ignored him again and turned to the group of kids. "Listen up!" he declared. "Important karate code: we, as the students, must always take revenge if the teacher is hurt!"
"Is that really a code?" asked a little girl.
"I just made it up," he replied in a whisper.
Zoro sighed at their childishness. "Listen, kid…"
"Hwa-YA!" yelled the leader boy, kicking Zoro in the stomach, and it was quite a good kick, too. Nothing of 'Sanji' standard, but still great for an eight year old.
Zoro rubbed the spot where he had been attacked and tried to talk again but grimaced when he saw all the other kids were getting into karate stances. Well, he couldn't bring himself to hurt innocent kids, so he turned and ran away.
"GET HIII-II-IIM!" commanded leader boy, and all the kids started to chase the smelly, green-haired 'murderer.'
Escaping from a bunch of crazy kids was harder than it seemed. For one thing, they were extremely and annoyingly energetic. Seriously, they could almost match up to Luffy in hyper activeness. It took Zoro a while to leave them in the dust. Panting, Zoro quickly ducked into a nearby building to hide himself away in case those kids should find him, but he failed to notice the huge sign that read 'POLICE' that hung on the front of the building.
But, this foolish act was rather a lucky move. Passing down the hallway, he happened to hear a peculiar conversation from inside a room.
"Sir, what do we do with these things?" asked a female voice.
"Just leave them on the desk here," replied a male. "I'll get them sorted out later."
"But who would leave dangerous things like these lying around?" the female persisted. "We need to find the person whom these belong to; someone carrying such life threatening bladed weapons should be taken to court!"
Life threatening weapons? Zoro's ears perked up at these words. Curious, he popped his head around the open door and peeked inside; and he bit his tongue to stop himself from shouting out loud. There, sitting on the desk, were three sheathed katana, perfectly undamaged, and were unmistakably his.
"Sarah, could you smile for once in your life?" the male voice belonged to a bulky man, wearing some sort of uniform with a badge.
"Gordon, sir, could you take your job seriously for once in your life?" the woman, Sarah, retorted.
"I will, I will. Just let me take my coffee break first," said Gordon with a yawn, heading towards the door. On seeing them coming his way, Zoro quickly ducked and pressed his body tightly against the wall around the corner. Luckily for him, Gordon and his complaining assistant headed in the opposite direction. As their bickering grew distant and faded, Zoro immediately sped back into the room they were in and snatched his katana off the table.
'Thank goodness they're safe,' thought Zoro, checking them over to see if there were any scratches on them. Thank goodness there weren't. He then grinned for the first time that day, out of pure relief and content.
But, his happy little moment didn't last long, because the mean author of this story won't allow it. Guess which duo Zoro heard coming down the corridor, still bickering, only this time about forgetfulness and unreliability? That's right…
"See, how could you forget your coffee mug when you're intended on taking a coffee break, eh? You really need to get your organisation sorted out and start listening to what I say…"
"Yes, yes, yes…" muttered Gordon as Sarah's voice droned on in the background.
Both of them stopped talking at the same time, stopping in the middle of their sentences, when they entered Gordon's office. A blur of green and white, accompanied by a deafening crash, they found themselves staring at a smashed window, a floor covered in glass shards and an empty desk, the three bladed weapons that were once placed there missing.
"Security!" yelled Sarah as alarms above head started to blare.
Gordon rushed to the window, just in time to catch a glimpse of a young man with short green hair, dashing away, three katana in his hand.
"Hey, you! With the dyed green hair!" shouted Gordon. "Stop right there!"
"IT'S MY NATURAL COLOUR!" came an irritated bellow from the distant figure in response, a load of security guards starting after him. "Got a problem?"
"…Natural… colour?" Gordon blinked as the sounds of security's shouting voices faded into the distance. "Is green hair even possible?"
Zoro seemed to have a destiny of being chased today. Now, he had a bunch of security and policemen on his tail, and people were beginning to stare as he sped past them on the street. Quickly ducking around a corner, he stopped for a moment to get his breath back, peeking over the side of the wall to see if his pursuers were still there. Unluckily for him, they were, and they were approaching fast. Hopefully they'd pass him without noticing.
But luck, of course, wasn't on his side, because the mean author of this story hates Zoro and wants him to suffer. So magically out of nowhere, a dog scuttled over and did a piss on Zoro's right leg. The poor swordsman jerked his leg away and cursed the dog silently for peeing on him. So in response, the dog began to bark, and because the evil author made it so, the dog's bark happened to be really loud.
"I see him, over there!" Footsteps headed over to Zoro's direction. Now his position was exposed.
"Shit!" cursed Zoro, turning and snarling at the dog. "Why did you have to do that, you stupid animal?"
At this moment, an old wrinkled lady hobbled over and waved her walking stick at him yelling, "Don't be mean to my little darling!"
"But the thing peed on me!" protested Zoro and received a whack on the head from the angry old granny.
"You apologize!" the granny insisted.
But, Zoro really didn't have time, seeing as the load of police were approaching fast, so scurried away without a word.
"Come back and say sorry!" the old nanny joined the police and went after Zoro.
Of course, all this commotion down the middle of the high street caused unwanted attention. A lot of unwanted attention. Guess who noticed the green haired swordsman as he rushed past?
"Look! There he is!" yelled the garbage men.
"Cripes, isn't that the guy who beat up our bud earlier?" demanded a few furious chavs.
"We love yoooouuu!" squealed the Zoro fan-girls.
"Hwa-YA!" shouted the karate kids, leaping up.
"SHIII-II-IT!" screamed Zoro as he ran for his life.
"Damn," muttered Gordon as he checked each of the security monitors in the security office. Somehow, none of the cameras scattered around the police station had caught a good, clear picture of the green haired intruder. Some odd silhouettes and images of the back of his head were the best they had. What good was this modern equipment when they needed it?
"Sir," said Sarah, walking into the room with files in hand, "you might want to check out these."
Gordon took a file from her and flicked through it, frowning. "Fingerprints?"
"Yes," she answered. "Those are fingerprints we found in your office." She then handed over another file and took out a new set of fingerprints, placing them side by side. "And these are the fingerprints we found at the swimming pool a few days ago," she said. "Look, they're identical. That means the same person with fingerprints unregistered in our system was at both today's scene and the mysterious swimming pool incident."
The swimming pool incident… Gordon had been pondering over that recently. Were these events related somehow? Who was that mysterious green haired young man?
Gordon shook his head and sighed, unable to link everything together.
Zoro gritted his teeth in terror. He was being chased by police, crazy fans, random karate kids, a mob of garbage men, a gang of chavs, and an angry old lady with a barking dog. If that wasn't scary enough, the crowd chasing him just seemed to increase by every passing minute! What the hell?
Coincidentally or by pure bad luck, Nami, Lynn, Luffy, and Usopp stood at the side of the curb down the road, trying to decide which way to go to look for Zoro. Lynn was extremely nervous, as she didn't want to deal with any more havoc.
"Please don't let Zoro get into trouble, please don't let Zoro get into trouble," Lynn prayed silently to the sky. Then she opened her eyes and saw Zoro running down the high street, a whole horde chasing after him. And, she did a dramatic fall.
"That looks like fun!" said Luffy, and Lynn stood up and grabbed him before he could go and join Zoro.
"What the hell are we going to do?" Nami muttered, shaking her head.
"Pretend we don't know him?" Lynn suggested hopefully.
Nami sighed. "I'm tempted, but that's not realistic, is it?"
"No…" Lynn sadly admitted.
"Smoke Star!" shouted Usopp unexpectedly, and suddenly the whole street was immediately thick with a foggy smoke following an explosion noise. Panic rose instantaneously.
"AARRH! TERRORISTS!"
"Someone call the fire brigade!"
"But there is no fire!"
"I'M BLIND! I'M BLI-III-IIND!"
Lynn wanted to shout, 'shut up! It's only smoke!' but held her tongue, because this was actually a great thing. Zoro could now get away from that crowd! She had to admit it was great thinking on Usopp's behalf.
"Luffy!" said Nami, seeing this great opportunity. "Grab Zoro!"
"Alright!" Luffy pulled his arm back and punched though the smoke.
There was a smack, followed by a high-pitched cry of, "Yowch!" as Luffy's hand snapped back again.
"Oops," muttered Luffy, thrusting his extended arm into the smoke again. This time he fumbled around for a moment before declaring, "Got him!" His arm reeled in at a high speed and before they could react, the figure grabbed by Luffy's rubber arm smacked straight into Nami, Lynn, and Usopp, sending all of them flying back. They sat up groggily and looked at the heavy thing lying on their laps, and realised it wasn't Zoro. It was a random dude with a beard, now unconscious from the impact. Shocked, they all gave a punch and send the poor dude flying back into the air somewhere.
"IDIOT!" screamed the trio, jumping up and giving Luffy a quick beating.
"Third time's lucky," said Luffy, his bruised and swollen face scrunched in concentration as he extended his arm again to search for his first mate. Shouts of "Pervert!", "It's a ghost!" could be heard inside from over in the crowd.
A few moments later, Luffy shouted again, "I've found him!"
Nami, Lynn and Usopp quickly stepped out of the way as a figure flew past and crashed into the brick wall not far behind them.
"You rubber bastard!" yelled the figure as the rest of the wall collapsed on him.
"That's Zoro alright," said everyone with a nod.
Luffy headed over, dug into the rubble to fish out Zoro, and slung him over his shoulder as he dashed along with the rest of his friends out of the smoke.
"I swear I'm going to kill you one day," muttered Zoro as he brushed himself off, throwing Luffy a dirty look. Guess he was still pissed off that his captain had chucked him into a brick wall.
All five of them stood in a random empty alley, away from the commotion in the high street where Zoro's pursuers were still looking for him. Also, none of them were in good shape; Nami, Lynn, and Usopp were covered in dirt, Luffy was still bruised from the beating his friends gave him, and Zoro… Do I even need to say? I mean he'd gone through a whole day's worth of torture, all because a certain little shrimp went and idiotically lost his katana.
The said little shrimp was now brushing herself off and as she bent over, noticed something that made her eyes widen. "You found your katana!" she exclaimed pointing to the three bladed weapons strapped to their master's waist. "I'm off the hook!" she added with a triumphant grin and punched the air in joy.
"Where did you find them?" asked Nami, looking at Zoro almost suspiciously.
Zoro was about to answer before Lynn suddenly stood still and sniffed.
"What's that stench?" she crinkled her nose. Following the source of the smell, she looked at Zoro with wide eyes. "Woah, you smell like shit!" she declared.
An awkward silence fell over everyone as Lynn realised that wasn't something Zoro wanted reminding.
"Anyway… Where did you find your katana?" Nami asked Zoro again, breaking the tension.
He told them of his business in the police station, and received a punch from Lynn and Nami for being such an idiot. Great. Now Zoro was wanted both in the 'One Piece' world and in the real world.
"Wait, if the police are after you now, you'll be recognised too easily in public," said Lynn.
"What? Because of his green hair?" asked Nami.
"Yeah."
An imaginary light bulb flashed above the girls' heads. Nami smiled. Lynn smiled. They exchanged a somewhat evil-plotting look, and then turn to Zoro. The swordsman stared at them for a moment before catching on.
"Oh no," he groaned. "You're not..."
"Oh yes," they said, advancing with a mischievous look in their eyes. "We are..."
AN: Ha-ha! Can you guess what they're going to do? How's that for a Zoro torture? If you enjoyed this, please, I repeat yet again, PLEASE review, review, review! Please? For the cookies? :3
And a big thank you to 'Rexan' for beta-ing again. :D
'Where-my-ideas-came-from' section
You know when Zoro talked to the old man with the ridiculous hearing problem? That was inspired by that time a while ago when I asked an old man just like that for directions.
Me: Excuse me, do you know how to get to David Lloyds sports centre?
Old dude: I'm sorry?
Me: Do you know how to get to DAVID LLOYDS?
OD: Loys…?
Me: DAVID LLOYDS!
OD: I'm sorry. I can't hear you.
Me: DAY. VID. LLOOOOYYYYYDDSSSSSSS~
OD: I'm sorry. I don't know anyone called David.
Me: *passes out*
Okay, the passing out didn't really happen, but you get the idea. And, I couldn't just leave either because that would be rude, and I'm not a very patient person, so it was kind of frustrating. -_-
Oh and when Zoro fell into the recycling bin? Well, that happened to me once when I was seven, so I couldn't even climb back out again until my dad heard me screaming and banging. Oh, and except it wasn't a recycling bin, it was a proper rubbish bin. And it wasn't chavs that shoved me in; I just lost my balance. (Don't ask me what I was doing climbing a rubbish bin.) I stank for a week after that. Joy. ¬.¬
Next time: When the circus comes to town, Luffy and the gang go to watch, but they get an unexpected surprise. Oh, and so does Zoro when Lynn and Nami's little 'plot' goes a bit wrong...