A/N:
Thanks to my three reviewers :-). You made me smile. I am still looking for a beta. Sorry it took me a few days to post. I have this story complete and plan to add a chapter every day but my daughter came down with the flu and I haven't been able to leave her side until now.
Twilight and all of its trademarks belong to Stephanie Meyer, not me.
Chapter 5. - Mother
JPOV
"Holy mother F-- Good God. Aaaahh!!" I yelled as I stood, rocking and trying to examine my thumb that I had just hammered into with all of my strength. That's one of the pitfalls of constructing things. The joy I took in it was worth the occasional – and very temporary – injury.
Esme had employed my services. She wanted me to build custom shelving and benches for the mudroom. It already had a nice set, but she wanted them to match the color and styling of the breakfast table, since it was nearby the entrance to the mudroom.
Esme tried to find things for me to do for our home as much as possible. I felt more like this was my home after the constellation in Nessie's playroom, but I still had my reservations, and I loathed being financially dependent on the Cullen's. Sometimes I felt just useless, and occasionally when Esme would cook me something particularly pricey - like lobster or crab legs - I would feel guilty for having to use more resources than the others. They didn't need to spend money on things like food, beverages, toilet paper, or hair cuts.
Esme had slowly become more and more of a mother figure to me. She took care of me in all of the ways a human mother would take care of her son. I had warmed up to all of the Cullen's – some more so than others – but particularly her. She knew how I felt.
Edward never outright told anyone my thoughts, just like he didn't with anyone else, but if Esme asked him simple questions, he would tell her the truth. Alice and I had also become fairly close since we spent so much time together while I was getting my high school diploma. It was her that told me about Esme asking Edward questions. Her questions were never anything too personal, and her intentions were harmless. Since she had this wonderful resource, she knew that I didn't like feeling useless and I felt like I wasn't earning my keep.
Carlisle was the only one who worked - well, you could call Alice's international investment portfolio work - and they were all fine with it. I, however, wasn't. Esme dabbled in interior decorating here and there, but it wasn't full time. I felt like my life outside of Renesmee was without purpose. I needed to feel like a productive member of society, and living under Carlisle's roof without providing any kind of financial contribution wasn't sufficient for me. I felt guilty for doing it. I worried that any day now I would wake up and my welcome mat would be bare threads. It didn't take Esme long to figure out a solution - put me to work.
Getting a "real job" was out of the question for now. We hoped to stay in Portland for as long as possible, and therefore tried to stay out of the public eye. Since Portland was much larger than Forks, it didn't have that "everybody knows everybody" community, so Carlisle thought we would be safe until Renesmee finished growing. I earned my keep by doing things around the house that would normally require a professional - pressure washing, cutting the lawn, buffing and waxing the floors, cleaning out the pool, and so on.
My personal favorite was bringing Esme's furniture ideas to life. She would sketch and I would build. She could probably have learned to do it herself, and could definitely hire a professional, but she knew what it meant to me.
"Jacob, what's wrong? Are you okay? I heard you scream." Esme entered my workshop from behind me, her voice and face clearly displaying her worry.
"I'll be fine; I just slammed my thumb on accident." I was holding it close to my body as I tried to compose myself in hopes of easing her mind.
"Come, let's have Carlisle take a look."
"No, it's fine. I didn't break or cut anything, so I should be fine in about an hour. I'm just going to take a break until its better." Her eyes still looked worried. "Okay, if it's still red and swollen in an hour, I'll have Carlisle look at it." I knew it would be fine by then.
"Alright, just take it easy. You know, taking a nice long break from all of your hard work might help increase your concentration and focus." Her eyes started to ease a bit, but there was something else lingering behind them.
"Esme, I take breaks every day. I play with Nessie for hours on end, hunt with her, and hang out with the guys. I relax. Plus, this work is satisfying, so it's not so much work as it is a hobby—"
She interrupted, "But when your mind isn't on Renesmee, it's on your feelings and responsibilities. Jacob, you know you are a part of this family. I see you as a son as much as I see Jasper or Emmett as my son. We were all outsiders at one point. If we didn't want you here, you wouldn't be here.
"This isn't just about Renesmee. You were brought into this family because of Renesmee, yes, but you are not a burden to anyone. Alice and Jasper came into our family because they wanted to live the way we do. They had no emotional attachment to us or us to them, they were strangers, but their kind and honest souls were enough for us to welcome them with open arms. Even if Renesmee were never born—" My heart dropped at the sound of that statement. "we would have still welcomed you to our family if you wanted to have us. Please, Jacob. Believe what I am telling you." She walked toward me gracefully, stepping over piles of wood and rubble in her designer heels, and hugged me despite the fact that my clothes were covered in sawdust.
"Jacob, I love you. We all do."
I questioned the "all" part, but I could tell that she truly meant what she said. I held her to me and thought about what she said. My emotions were soaring and I felt like I might cry. I hadn't had a mother in so long, and this woman took me in as her own, as a cat would take in a puppy that had been abandoned by its mother. I hadn't exactly been abandoned, but it felt great to have a mother. My heart soared and I let my emotions wash over me. I pulled away from her and put my hands on her petite shoulders.
"I love you, too, Esme." We shared a sincere gaze for a moment, tears began to well in my eyes, but I pulled her back to me before they could fall. "But I still insist on earning my keep," I said jokingly to lighten the moment. We laughed, and she knew I meant it. Esme's face looked as if she had just shed a few tears herself, overjoyed and filled with emotion.
"Fine." Her face looked focused on something else, something far away. She smirked at me and walked through the debris on the ground like she was walking barefoot across carpet. I didn't even want to know what she was contemplating. I felt like retribution was right around the corner.
I left the workshop and, like instinct, went to find my girl in the colossal mansion. I found her in the playroom, of course, with Bella. They both heard me coming, but didn't stop their activities. Nessie was lying across Bella's lap with a pretend baby bottle in her mouth. Bella tickled Nessie's foot and her giggle sounded like that of an infant. When I was standing a few feet away from the rocking chair where they sat, they both finally acknowledged my presence.
"Baby Nessie is having lunch." Bella then lifted Nessie up to her shoulder and patted her back, as if to burp her. After a few pats, she faked a little burp.
"Mama, JAY JAY!" she said in a baby voice while pointing at me.
"Should I come back later? I hate to interrupt your playtime together; I was just looking for something to do."
"I thought you were working on the new mudroom digs?" Bella asked as she went back to rocking Nessie like an infant. Nessie was focused on her mother's face admiringly as she played with Bella's hair.
"Well, I umm, need to take a little break," I replied. Esme murmured my reasoning from across the house.
"You're hurt??" Bella said with a tone similar to what Esme had used earlier in the workshop. Nessie's focus quickly changed from Bella's face to me, eyeing my swollen red thumb.
"No, I'm fine. Really." Vampires and their damn supersonic hearing.
"Well, I need to speak with Esme for a moment, care to take over 'Jay Jay'?"
"My JAY JAY! JAY JAY!" I hoped this nickname wasn't permanent, although the baby voice was quite adorable. I scooped her up from Bella's lap.
"Whaddya say we take a walk?"
"I'll go get my shoes!" She broke from her baby character quickly and darted to her dressing room to retrieve her sneakers.
We walked around the garden together, taking in the sights and smells. Nessie's favorite flower was the purple passion flower. Esme had rows of purple passion flowers growing on ornate iron trellises. The flowers were very complex in shape, and more unique than any flower I had ever seen- much like my Renesmee.
"Please tell me you aren't going to start calling me Jay Jay," I pleaded with Nessie as we walked hand in hand through the two acre garden.
"No. That's just baby talk, silly. But you better hope no one over heard it. I should have thought about that before I said it aloud," Nessie said jokingly, her face looking up at me with an apologetic grin.
"Oh wonderful. I can hear Em and your dad already."
"If I hear any mention of it, I'll tell them to keep their mouths— Oh, look at this one!" She was distracted by a rather large purple passion flower.
"Anyways, how's your thumb feeling?" I glanced down at it, evaluating before responding.
"Back to normal. I should probably get back to work. I don't have much more to do and I want to finish up. I'm getting low on funds."
I had Esme pay me in pieces for projects like this. The first payment covered supplies, if I needed money I'd ask for a small advance, and she paid whatever amount she determined in the end. It was always too much, but refusing it was not an option. She felt bad enough that I insisted on working for my money, I couldn't gripe if it were too much.
"Race me back?" And she took off immediately, without even waiting for my reply.
I took off after her. Thanks to her head start, she actually beat me. That was pretty uncommon and always required her having a head start. Watching her run was so unusual. She was so small, and still a bit slow compared to the rest of us. Her bronze curly hair flowing down her back looked like fluid embers when she ran. You'd never look at her – in her adorable custom clothing and perfect curls – and think she were capable of attacking animals, climbing ancient trees with ease, or running at inhuman speeds.
After I walked Nessie back inside, I headed to the shop to finish up. It didn't take long. It had already been practically finished but needed a couple of extra support beams added in the back.
Esme was in the kitchen preparing my dinner when I came inside. The house was quiet; several Cullen's were out for the day. I wasn't sure who was here, though, so I was trying with all of my might to think of anything but Nessie calling me 'Jay Jay' earlier.
"Hey, Esme! What's for dinner?"
"Oh just some grilled chicken alfredo. How's your thumb?"
"All better, just as I thought. I finished with the benches and stuff."
"Oh, wonderful!! Emmett, Jasper, can you bring it in from the shop?" Even after over two years of living with them, it still caught me off guard when they had these conversations from across the mansion without ever raising their voices higher than conversation level. Esme's voice was higher than usual, but not out of necessity. She seemed particularly excited about the new furniture.
"They're going to look great. I added some extra support beams to the backs. They would probably fine, but just to be safe."
Emmett and Jasper brought the pieces in through the mudroom door. They could have easily handled the weight of the objects with one hand, but they were bulky and difficult to maneuver through the doorways alone. Esme joined them in the mudroom and admired her new furnishings.
"Thanks boys, I'll arrange them in a bit." She made her way back to the kitchen to finish preparing my dinner. I decided to keep her company, though my heart was pulling me to Renesmee's general direction.
"So, what's going on in your life these days? Anything interesting?" My girl must have heard me talking to Esme. She came running in and gracefully hopped up onto the stool beside me at the counter.
"Oh not much, really. You?" There was never anything new. Well, nothing that wasn't known by the entire household within minutes of its occurrence.
"No, not really. I'm going into town tomorrow to get some shopping done. I need some shoes and a hair cut for sure. Do you need me to pick anything up?"
"No, but thank you Jake. I went to town a few days ago."
"Can I come?! I need some books!" Nessie loved shopping, almost as much as Alice. I could handle a book store. Thank God she didn't say she needed new toys or clothes. That was not my forte at all.
"As long as your dad says its okay, the answer is yes." Her eyes twinkled and she hugged my neck, petting my hair. My heart melted. Esme placed my plate in front of me as she smiled her uplifting, maternal smile.
After dinner I immediately got in the shower. Sweat combined with sawdust wasn't a pleasant smell. I tried not to stay in for longer than necessary. Last time I did that, Emmett and Edward were snickering and making comments as to what they suspected I had been doing. Edward knew I was just showering. Raging hormones and self gratification were at the bottom of my priority list.
I had my own bathroom, of course. My shower was massive with marble floor and walls and a long bench. Shower heads from all directions. Who wouldn't want to sit in that thing for an hour? I decided to risk the ridicule and sit there for however long I felt like it.
I just lay on the long bench, letting the heat relax my tired muscles. The water was so hot I was sweating, but I didn't mind. The bulbs on this side of my much-larger-than-necessary bathroom were fairly dim, and every room and bathroom had surround sound, so between the low lights and the sound of my favorite tunes, this shower was my place of serenity. After becoming nearly comatose from all of the relaxation, I forced myself to step out of my warm tranquility and into the cold air of the house. Ugh.
I wrapped myself in one of the Egyptian cotton towels Alice had given me for Christmas last year. She gave me a robe as well, but I couldn't bring myself to use it. She should have known that. We definitely didn't have towels like this on the reservation.
My muscles were still mush, as if I had just spent an hour in a steam room, and my body temperature was still slightly higher than its usual 108.9 degrees. I should have dried myself off and dressed, but instead I just landed in the bed. I hadn't been getting enough sleep – staying up late working on Esme's project, then getting up early with Nessie. I rolled onto my side to get comfortable and noticed a small package on my dresser. Despite my body's attempt at resisting, I forced myself out of the comfortable bed.
The package was a long rectangle, like a larger version of a jewelry box. The wrapping was simple- light blue with an ivory bow that was just short of being ostentatious. The small hang tag was ivory and written in the most beautiful script were the words 'To my Son.'
The possibility that it could have been from my dad never crossed my mind. I knew exactly who it was from. The only mother I had ever truly known – Esme. I was very young with my biological mother died, so to me it was almost like I never had one.
I opened the package, being careful to not rip the bow to shreds. On the top of everything in the package, there was a small envelope which contained an ivory note card resting atop a pile of tissue paper.
Jacob,
Carlisle and I would like to present you with this gift. You have earned every bit of it. We haven't told Renesmee, so you go ahead after you open it. I know how much you love to make her smile. Thank you so much for the love and happiness you have brought to our family. Oh, and thanks for the mudroom furnishings. They look great!
With love,
Esme
Before I opened the gift any further, I had to put some clothes on. I would want to thank Carlisle and Esme for whatever it was. Though it was late and I was really ready for bed, I decided to dress somewhat decent instead of pajamas. I wore one of the shirts Esme had bought me – I knew it would make her smile – and a pair of my favorite jeans. I combed my hair neatly then placed the box on my bed.
I sat down and pulled out the tissue that was on the top. Nothing shiny was showing, good. Too big to be car keys, good. Alas, two envelopes- one a large manila, the other looked like a normal envelope. I saved the best for last and opened the small one first. Inside was a thick stack of cash and another note-
'This is for the furniture. You really did an amazing job!'
Five stacks of hundreds totaling $5,000. I was used to $500, $1,000 if it was something complicated, but five-thousand-dollars?! I never wanted much for my jobs; just enough to get the essentials like clothes, hair cuts, shoes, and so on. Providing me with a place to live and food in my stomach was more than enough. What on earth was I going to do with this much money? They never let me pay for anything, and I wasn't one for lavish material objects. Saving that thought for later, I moved on to the larger envelope, wondering how on earth it could top the first one.
I was a little confused at first. I dumped the contents onto the bed. Part of a picture snuck out from between all of the papers. When I pulled the picture away from the documents, everything made sense. All of this happening in a matter of seconds. It was a picture of Isle Esme.
I had never been there, but heard enough about it to know without a doubt that this was what I was looking at. It looked like it was taken during the boat ride to the mainland. You could see the huge house, the beach, and lush vegetation galore. I examined all of the contents- plane tickets, a passport, the photo, a list of recommended pre-trip shopping, and a schedule. Wow, they were giving me a vacation. How perfect. I was starting to get jealous of the others after all their trips, but no way was I going out of the country without Nessie.
All of the Cullen couples traveled to Isle Esme occasionally. Sometimes just for a weekend, other times for a couple of weeks. It was never a family event, but alone time for the couples. There was no privacy in the Cullen home. Occasionally a couple would stay in town at a hotel for the night. I tried as hard as I could not to imagine the reasons behind the outings. I never went to the island, though. One, I was never invited to; two, I never had any desire to go wherever Renesmee was not.
The trip would begin two weeks from today. According to the lengthy schedule, we would arrive on the island around 11:00 pm island time. My mind drifted to Nessie and how bored she would be during the long flights. Trips to Forks were easy for her, since she almost always slept the entire way, and the drive was less than 5 hours. When she returned from the girls shopping trip to China, she didn't whine much about the long flight, but she could have been doing that to spare me the negative energy. With all of the gadgets in the house, I'm sure we could come up with something to keep us occupied.
I had never been out of the country or inside an airplane. Well, I had been inside Canada, but that doesn't really count. It was more like visiting a neighboring state, and there definitely wasn't anything exciting to see in Cananda.
The recommended shopping list was inevitable, but I decided I'd spare myself for now. The length of it was enough to give me nightmares. At least they didn't just buy everything on the list for me the way they did with designer clothes, watches, and shoes. I put everything back inside the box. Tanking my parental figures for such an incredible present was the only thing I wanted to do at that moment.
As I made my way around the house in search of Carlisle and Esme, I saw Alice curled up on a chair in the family room. She glanced up at me and smiled her wide, energetic smile.
"They're in Carlisle's study," Alice said as she gazed at me as if she wanted to say more.
"But how'd you…." I didn't understand.
Alice had overcome her inability to see anything that involved me after a full year of working on it, but she still couldn't read anything specifically related to me if no one else was involved. She probably saw Esme and Carlisle planning the trip and giving me the gift, but she shouldn't have been able to see my reaction to it and decision to search the house for them. Her face looked thrilled that I opened the line of conversation.
"Well, I was going to wait until you were done speaking with Carlisle and Esme, but since you asked… My little problem with reading you; it's getting BETTER!" She jumped out of her chair from all the excitement and stood across from me. "I have been getting tiny bits and pieces for a couple of weeks. I've been focusing intently on them and trying to build on them. Then a few minutes ago, I just saw it clear as day. You were walking toward your bedroom door to go find Carlisle and Esme. I couldn't see why exactly, but other things I'd already seen brought me to the obvious conclusion. Now, get to the study. Come back after you tuck in Ness, though." It hadn't even occurred to me that her bedtime was nearing. Alice must have been really making progress. Her giddiness reminded me of a child who just learned how to ride a bike.
"That's great news! I hate to run, but I need to see Carlisle and Esme. I'll be back in a bit." I turned to walk away when suddenly Alice was wrapping her cold arms around my torso.
"Yes, you will!" she said, as if the vision of her and I chatting later just popped into her head. She rested her head on my chest briefly and took in a deep breath. "You know, Jake, you really smell a lot better right after a long shower."
"I better stop showering, then. See you in a little bit." I saw her grimace as I turned to walk away.
Carlisle and Esme were exactly where Alice said they'd be, in his study. They didn't look terribly occupied when I knocked on the open door. It looked like they were just having a casual conversation.
"Come in, Jacob. Have a seat." Carlisle gestured toward the unoccupied leather wingback chair beside Esme.
I wasn't sure what to say or how to say it. This whole family thing was still new to me. Every day since Esme and I shared our 'I love you,' I felt more and more comfortable. That didn't mean I magically became better at explaining my feelings.
"Thanks," I said in a hushed tone as I walked toward the chair. A lump was forming in my throat. Instead of pouring my heart out, I stuck with what I was comfortable with.
"So, what brings you here at this hour?" Carlisle looked at me from behind his desk, wearing a sincere smile.
"Well, uuh…" I bit my lip and tried to find something in the room to focus on so I could gather my thoughts. I should have deliberated about this more on the walk to the room. "Well, I just wanted to thank you two for the gift. I'm really excited about it; this truly means a lot to me." I couldn't even begin to explain the feelings I had. "I've never been outside of the Northwest continental US. So, who all's coming?"
"You're very welcome, Jacob. And we're all going; all ten of us. We wanted to take you sooner, but Edward and Bella weren't too keen on taking Ness back after the housekeeper incident. We knew you would have no interest in leaving Renesmee to go to Isle Esme. Finding a trustworthy housekeeper in that region was really difficult, but Bella insisted that the old ones had to be let go before Renesmee would be allowed to go there."
"Wow, that's great. I mean, about all of us going. Thanks for going to such lengths for me." I wanted to say so much more, but I choked. "Wow, it's getting late. I better go tell Nessie goodnight before she falls asleep."
"Have you told her?" Esme inquired.
"No, I'm going to wait until tomorrow. She'll be up all night if I tell her now. I know she will be ecstatic."
Bella's melodic voice filled the playroom as I entered. She was reading Nessie a bedtime story. I waited on the balcony, giving Bella her much deserved quality time with Nessie. I spent so much time with her that sometimes I felt guilty, like I wasn't leaving enough time for everyone else.
The night air was chilly and damp. It was misting lightly overhead, but the moon and a few stars poked out of the clouds in the distance. I stood there for several minutes taking in the fresh wintery air.
"Nice night, eh?" Bella said softly but sarcastically. Even with the mist, it still was a fairly nice night.
"Is she asleep?" I looked over at Bella as I spoke. The gentile wind was blowing her perfect hair around her face.
"No, she's waiting for you." She was looking at the stars in the distance.
"I'll be back." I walked inside and up the stairs.
Nessie was curled into a ball under her covers, her curls piled perfectly on the pillow.
"You were too busy today." Renesmee turned to look at me as I sat in the chair beside the bed. Her little voice sounded disappointed.
"What are you talking about, silly? We walked in the garden for over an hour, you sat with me when I ate dinner, and we played dress up for a long while this morning."
"But…. Well, we usually watch TV for a little while before bedtime." Her pouty face crushed me.
"Oh, I'm sorry sweetie. I was just really tired this evening." I remembered the gift and was filled with excitement, but I had to remain sullen on the outside. Nessie couldn't know about this until tomorrow. "How about this – tomorrow morning, we will go book shopping like we talked about earlier." Her little face perked up in an instant. If she only knew what tomorrow had in store for her.
"Night, Jake. Love you."
"I love you too, sweetie. Goodnight." I kissed her forehead.
"Take me for ice cream, too?" she added as I was making my way to the stairs.
"Of course." Or cake, or hell we could go to Belgium in search of the worlds finest chocolate if she asked.
Bella stood on the balcony still. I could see her hair blowing in the now stronger breeze. Alice would be up all night anyways, so I took advantage of a rare opportunity – time alone with Bella. I still loved Bella, just not the way I once had. She was my best friend. I felt for her the way she felt for me all along. I remember trying so hard to figure out a way to make myself imprint on her. I would have given anything for her to choose me over Edward. Funny how things work themselves out sometimes.
"Hey, Bells. Shouldn't you be out killing poor defenseless creatures or something?"
"Shouldn't you be howling at the moon?" She smirked and raised an eyebrow. Moisture glistened in her hair.
"That's only when there's a full moon, duuh." There was a long moment of quiet as we both enjoying the refreshing night air.
"How's life?" I asked earnestly. Anyone in the house could see what she did, but it was hard to tell her true feelings. She always seemed completely content – unnaturally and wholly satisfied.
"If I'm being honest… absolutely perfect. I couldn't ask for more from life. I have everything I've ever dreamed of having and more. My daughter is the most amazing creature to ever exist, my husband – well, I know you don't want to hear all about Edward, but he's perfect for me in every way, my family – you included – is a group of the most kindhearted people on earth. I've got it all, Jake. It's unnatural how wonderful everything has turned out. You?" We were both propped against the railing, gazing out at the sky.
"Let me see…. I live in a mansion, I have permission to drive the numerous sports cars lined in the garage – with the exception of one. I have a mother who cooks me the most amazing meals imaginable" Bella looked at me from the corner of her eye and a smile covered her entire face, she was thrilled that I saw Esme the way she did. "Every day I play with the most amazing creature ever to exist. My heart is filled with profound happiness every time I see her face. My adopted family has taken me in – someone they once saw as a smelly beast – and treats me just like I am their own blood. Even Rosalie is starting to come around." I could have continued, but it was late and I still had to go talk to Alice.
"Edward doesn't let you drive the Aston Martin, huh? He doesn't let me either."
"I did once when you were pregnant. Carlisle let me once, too, when you guys were out of town for the weekend. I just drove it around the area. I'm pretty sure it was part of his plan to get me to feel more at home with you guys. It was when we first moved here. I wouldn't do it again though, I spent the entire ride worrying about the possibility of a tree falling on it and what method Edward would use to end my life if that happened." I chuckled.
"Now I'm jealous. I've never gotten to drive it. I've only even ridden in it a few times."
"Are you excited about taking Nessie to the island?"
"I'm excited for Nessie, but I'm very nervous. The housekeeper knew, Jacob. She was scared to death." A look of concern came over her face as she turned her body to face me.
"Bella, that's been taken care of. You know that. There's no need to worry. Please tell me you won't ruin my first international trip by worrying the entire time?"
"Fine. I really am excited about seeing Renesmee on the beach. I wonder how the sea creatures will respond to you two. They won't come anywhere near the rest of us."
"I never noticed any fish fleeing from us when we were cliff diving, but then again I wasn't paying much attention. Have you heard Alice's news?"
"No, what is it??" she asked in a concerned tone.
"Oh, it's nothing bad. Come with me to talk to her, I only caught the beginnings of it."
Bella walked with me at a human pace back to the family room where Alice and Jasper were talking quietly. By the looks on their faces, I could assume it was something gushy.
"Hey guys. What's the news?" Bella asked in a glittering tone.
"Get this! I can – kind of – read Jacob!!"
Bella and I sat down on the sofa across from them. Bella's ladylike mannerisms still stunned me. She was hardly the Bella I'd once known. This Bella wore dresses almost daily and crossed her legs when she sat. Of course, she didn't buy the dresses, but I could tell she was growing fond of her new found femininity.
"Really? How did this happen?" Bella replied curiously, propping her elbow on her knee and her head on her fist.
"Well, like I told Jacob before- I've been picking up bits and pieces of his future for a couple of weeks, but nothing that made sense. I tried to concentrate on the pieces and bring something else forward, but nothing ever happened. Then earlier I just saw it, clear as day. I wasn't even trying very hard. It happened again while I was talking to him earlier. He was talking to Renesmee about going book shopping while he tucked her in. I can't believe it! I feel whole again!" Alice's voice was about two octaves higher than usual the entire time she spoke.
"So what do you think this means?" Bella's voice still curious.
"Well, I don't know. I haven't had a chance to talk to Carlisle about it yet. Maybe it's similar to the way you learned to expand your shield, except it took a lot longer to develop. Or how I eventually started seeing Nessie, though that didn't take nearly as long."
"Have you been doing anything different lately?" Jasper asked, he obviously hadn't put that much thought into it until Bella's curiosity level sparked him.
"Well, I've been thinking about the trip a lot lately, trying to foresee how everything will go… but I kept running into dead ends whenever Jacob was directly involved. I sat in the woods alone for a while, in hopes that being farther away from Jacob would offer some clarity. It was no use. I just kept trying as hard as I could. That's when I started getting little flashes, bits and pieces. Then out of nowhere this evening I got the crystal clear vision of Jacob walking around the house looking for Carlisle and Esme."
"Wow, babe, that's great! I wonder what else any of us could be capable of if we really set our mind to it." Jasper's face was puzzled, his fingers running through his blonde hair. I could tell they were about to break into a conversation that I had no interest in.
"Well Cullen's, it's been grand, but humans need sleep. I'll see you guys in the morning."
"Night, Jay Jay," Edward muttered, smirking as he walked toward the family room.
Jasper's brow furrowed and my expression screamed 'don't even ask.' I shoulder-checked Edward as I passed him when I started walking toward my room. He knew it was coming, and he knew he could take me down with ease in human form, but he just let it happen and kept walking.
A/N:
I hope you all are enjoying the story thus far!! Let me know by leaving a review!
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