HELLO! I finally wrote something, AND FINISHED IT, before thirty days! I've never felt prouder:)
Disclaimer: Did PucKurt happen in Glee? No? Well, I don't own Glee then:D I also don't own the awesome songs I used here.
Also try to look for the HIMYM semi-quote. I freaking love that show!
This was originally a two shot buuuut if you want me to continue it, I shall :D
First: Date
Puck and Kurt's first date was a complete and totally by accident.
Puck paced around the room. He was preparing for the glee club's fancy dinner. They were celebrating Ha!-Vocal-Adrenaline-got-thier-asses-disqualified-by-trying-to-take-New-Direction's-set-list-from-Coach-Slyvester(You'd think she learned the first time).
Puck was clean, shaven, and suited up (How I Met Your Mother is his guilty pleasure. Tell anyone he will kill you)
"And you won't bring me down! There, I sang it, Puck. Now get your phone out of my face"
Puck chuckled at his ring tone. He suddenly remembered the day he recorded that. It was the time he and Kurt hung out in his hotel room. Early on the night, he had asked Kurt what really happened during the diva-off. Kurt admitted he messed up on purpose though he didn't say why. So Puck recorded the high F and made it his ring tone. (And no, he wasn't looking for a reason to have Kurt as his ring tone. It just happened.)
They changed after that night in the hotel room. They were more civil with each other. They'd hung out when the both of them would be early for glee, which happened every practice (It's not like Puck planed to be thirty minutes early for glee. And of course he didn't know Kurt would be there too) Puck had texted him a couple of time for fashion advice and stuff like that but that was it. That was the total extent of their relationship. Not that Puck wanted more. He didn't. He wasn't some sissy.
Puck looked at his phone. Maybe it's from Quinn, Reminding him to rot in hell. ("Don't worry, dude, It's just the hormones" Finn explained when he got the first message "She does it to me all the time"
Can you pick me up? My Baby is in the shop-K
Puck was NOT excited at the fact he would spend extra time with Kurt. He wasn't. Really.
Driving to Kurt's, Puck was nervous. He didn't know why. It was just one team mate picking up the other for fancy dinner.
Wait, that came out wrong.
He drove to Kurt's house to see a waiting Kurt on the porch with a beefy man Puck thought was his father. Kurt kissed the man on the cheek and ran to Puck's rusty red pick-up truck.
"Hey" Kurt greeted. He was wearing black tux. His cheeks were flushed and his ears were red, Puck noted. Not that Puck paid close attention.
"I mean honestly!" Kurt ranted as they got out the car "Sixteen and pregnant. Really world? Really?!"
Puck laughed as he opened the door to the restaurant.
After waiting for a few minutes, Kurt and Puck were seated at a 12 person table. They waited and talked, just the two of them. Sometimes, they'd text the other glee clubbers where they were but they didn't really mind being the only two there. Not that they said that out loud. They didn't want to show that they were enjoying each other's company. That would show weakness and no way in hell they would do that.
"Uhm, Sirs?" Approached the waitress after one and a half hours of being just them at the 12 seater table. "If your party fails to arrive you shall be moved to a two seater table."
Puck and Kurt both glanced at the door. It's not like they minded being the only two there.
"The girls aren't replying" Kurt said
"So are the guys…"
They looked at each other. They wanted this, no wait, they needed this. They waited so long for this. Enough waiting, they needed it now.
They were talking about dinner of course.
"Yeah sure" Puck said "We'll move"
The waitress moved them to a more secluded area of the restaurant. Couples filled the room, finely dressed and drinking wine and champagne. She, the waitress, lead them to a table. When they were seated, the waitress turned to Puck and said "May I offer you and your boyfriend complimentary wine, Sir?"
"I'm not his boyfriend. We're not dating. I'm straight." Puck quickly said "We're just friends"
Kurt deflated a little. Of course he and Puck were just friends. How stupid was he to expect more? Kurt shook it off. Well, fuck 'em. I don't care, Kurt thought. Crap, who was he fooling? Of course he cares. But for now he'll force out a smile and try not to burst out in tears. And later he can stuff himself with Ben and Jerry's while watching F.R.I.E.N.D.S. on DVD.
"Oh, Okay" the waitress smiled. She was blonde, most likely seventeen and dumb as a post. Normally with those three characteristics, Puck would have already asked for her number but now it was different. Puck didn't even notice that the girl was practically flashing him. All Puck noticed was Kurt showing him an incredibly fake smile.
"Hey, you okay?" Puck asked after the girl left, muttering "OHMYGAWD, What the fuck is wrong with you?!"
"You shouldn't have ignored her" Kurt said quietly, focusing on the bread stick basket flashy the waitress gave. "She obviously wanted to get a date from you"
"Well, I'd rather spending my time with you" Puck said opening the menu "So, let's order?"
Puck wouldn't admit it but Kurt was pretty great date. Okay, 'pretty great' is an understatement. SUPERMEGAFUCKINGAWESOME was more like it. He wasn't as annoying as Berry and less demanding as any girl he dated. What surprised him the most was the fact that he was seriously interested on Puck and didn't just yap and yap about PMS or something. He was probably being bias and stuff but it was the best date he's ever been in a long time.
After diner Puck decided to end the night by leaving his car in the lot and just walking with Kurt.
The walk was probably Puck's favorite part of the date. It was the first time Kurt actually let down his defenses and let someone in. He told the story of his mom and how she died. And how he took care of his dad.
"It's not like I minded" Kurt said as they reached the driveway of Kurt's house "It gave me a distraction, you know?"
"I know what you mean; I did the same with my mom when that douche bag left for the second time"
Kurt gave Puck sympathetic pat on the back as they stepped into his porch.
"So…" Kurt laughed
"I really enjoyed tonight, Kurt" Puck said so sincerely it almost freaked Kurt out.
"Me too" Kurt said, smiling.
"They stood awkwardly for a few seconds, not knowing what to do next.
"So, uh, yeah. Good night" Puck said, enveloping Kurt into in a hug. Kurt tried not to over think the hug.
I think he did well: "OHMYGAWD! Does he love me? Wait. LOVE? ALREADY?!I mean, I don't love him. Surely, I don't. I mean, how can I love him? What, I've only hung out with him a few times but I must admit, I really enjoy hanging out with him. Man, I really think too much. I wonder what he's thinking about. Am I hugging too tight? Too awkward? I hope he doesn't think I'm such a freak. What's his facial expression? Is he smiling? Would it be weird if I look up? No, wait. He might think I want a kiss…Okay, maybe I do. But he might feel obliged to do it. And we all know we don't want that to happen. Hm, he feels warm. It's nice. I hope he doesn't think I'm too warm. Crap, Am I sweating? I know I should have gone with the Armani suit jacket instead of the Ralph Lauren. I'm practically a fountain. Is he gay? He said he's straight but still he just had a date with WMHS's ice queen. Is this a date? I mean, it was just us two, THE WHOLE NIGHT. So was it? WAS IT?!"
Kurt was amazed he thought of that of all that in ten seconds.
"Bye" Kurt said as he entered his house, smiling like a love sick idiot.
Years later, in Finn's best man speech he admits he planned the whole thing.
First: Kiss
Noah Puckerman is proud to say that their first kiss wasn't an accident.
Puck paced up and down his room. It's been a week since the date. A week since the hug. A week since the best night of his life.
School was a blur of secret glances across the cafeteria and sly smiles across the choir room.
Sometimes, Puck would catch himself staring at the beautiful soprano. It was freaking him out. He wasn't gay, was he? It's not like he was checking other guys, just Hummel. He was confused. And he hated it.
But he did know something; He wanted him. No wait, he needed him. He just didn't know how to get him.
Kurt was currently at the Hummel's guest room, having a sleep over with the girls of the glee club. They all wore Kurt's many clothes and dancing to the many un-understandable Lady Gaga songs.
"I want your bad romance" They shouted and landed on the big mattress mesh (Three queen sized mattresses placed side by side.)
"Damn, Hummel." Santana said, in her WMHS cheering uniform PJ's. "You throw a rocking sleepover"
"Yeah" Quinn said. (Mrs. Puckerman had agreed to look after little Diana Rainne Puckerman-Fabray so Quinn could have a little break from being a mom) "Really cool, Kurt"
Kurt laughed and said "You're welcome ladies. Glad you liked it"
As they were setting up for the 'Skins' marathon, Santana, the queen of bluntness, asked "So, how's the old love life, Kurt?"
Kurt thought for a moment, he thought of Puck and the so called date and the damn hug. And answered "The big zero"
Meanwhile…
Puck was still pacing in his room. He needed help. Badly. He called the first person he thought of.
"Hello?"
"I NEED HELP!"Puck screamed
"Puck? Is that you?"Asked the other line
"Mister Schue?"
"Uh, yeah. You did call"
"Sorry, Mister Schue. Wrong number"
"Okay?" said Mister Schue, laughing
Puck was about to say goodbye when he heard someone from the other line; "Will? Are you done yet? Dinner is getting cold"
"Was that Miss Pillsbury?" Puck asked
"Well, you seem like a busy person. Do you homework. Practice the routine. I'll see you at glee. Bye!" and mister Schue promptly hung up.
Puck raised his eyebrow and carefully dialed the right number.
"Finn Hudson here. What's up?"
"I NEED HELP!" Puck screamed
"Shoot"
"Okay, let's say I have this friend and, let's say, hypothetically, he's a guy and his name is…uhm, Buck"
"Buck?"
"Buck. Okay and let's say he likes his friend, Shurt. And, theoretically, Shurt is a guy. And I'm not saying Buck is gay or anything. He totally likes women and beer and fight club and stuff like that. But whenever he sees Shurt he get's stupid and stuff and suddenly those dumb chick song play's in his head. You know, the one with the name 'Stephen' in it. Which Buck heard when his sister was singing it. And he wants Shurt and Buck to be together but Shurt might not feel the same way 'cause Buck use to pick on him when he was still a douche but now he's changed and stuff. What should Buck do?"
"I think Buck should tell Shurt how he feels"
"Buck is scared he might get hurt"
"Buck should take the leap 'cause he might regret not doing it"
"…Finn?"
"Hm?"
"I'm Buck"
"I know
"Kurt's Shurt"
"I know"
"…"
"Puck?"
"Yeah?"
"You know what you have to do?"
"Yeah"
"Well?"
"Buck is scared"
"Pinn's right here for support"
At Kurt's
They were all sitting on the mattress, in their PJ's, eating popcorn and silently watching 'Skins' when they heard a aping on the window."What the-" Kurt said approaching the window
"OHMYGAWD! It's Puck" Kurt breathe
Puck was standing barefoot on the Hummel backyard. Wearing nothing but a shirt and sweatpants.
"Puck! What the hell are you doing? It's freaking freezing!"
"Wow, real romantic, Kurt" Mercedes said from the mattress. They all stayed back, not wanting to be seen by Puck.
"Is someone there, Kurt?" Puck asked, nervously
"Uh, no" Kurt said, slightly turning his head to shoot a look to the girls.
"Wait, there. I'm coming down"
"So" Kurt said when he was down, facing Puck "You're here, why?"
"Uhm, you forgot your pen" Puck said
"This isn't my pen"
"Yes it is"
"It looks as if it's been chewed on"
"It's still your pen"
"…Recently"
"So, okay. It's not your pen" Puck said taking the pen and tossing the pen away. "So, yeah. Bye"
"Puck!"Kurt called, stopping from his hasty escape. "You drove here, a 40 minute drive from you house, to give me a pen"
"It's only 30 minutes if you speeded." Puck mumbled.
"Puck?" Kurt smiled and lightly touched Puck's hand. "You don't just drive all this way, barefooted, on a freezing November night to give back a pen"
"Yes, I did. Kay? Bye" Puck said running towards his car.
Kurt let out a sigh and entered his house from his back door. Puck is so damn confusing.
Puck came in his car, hyperventilating. ".shit" Puck muttered "I can't do this. I can't do this!"
"Of course you can" said someone from the backseat of his car, clamping a hand on his shoulder.
"WHATTHEFUCK! I have a pipe!" Puck said grabbing his pipe from under his seat.
"Chill, dude, it's me" Puck turned to see Finn, smiling like the idiot he is.
"DUDE! WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING HERE?!" Puck was glad his car was sound proof.
"You said you needed help" Finn smiled.
"SO YOU HIJACK MY CAR?!"
"Pretty much. Yeah"
"So what happened?" Rachel asked as Kurt entered
"Nothing. He came because he wanted to return a pen"
"A pen?" They exclaimed in chorus
"Yehp" he said and plopped down on the mattress
"Uh, Kurt?"Tina said from the window. "You might wanna see this" Kurt approached the window to see Puck holding a bunch of two by four signs, a nervous smile on his lips.
Slowly, Puck let down the first sign fall revealing these words:
HEY!
I
KINDA
REALLY
LIKE
YOU
AND
I
KINDA
HOPE
YOU
LIKE
ME
TOO
Kurt was, well, he didn't really know how to describe how he felt. He was surprised in an oh-shit-oh-shit-oh-fucking-shit-he-likes-me-back!-he-fucking-likes-me-back kinda way.
"Care to come down?" Puck asked.
Kurt ran down the stairs (Everyone was in the guest room. It was larger than his basement room) to the backyard. As soon as he saw Puck, he started to smile. And promptly tackled the mohawked teen to the ground.
"I can't *kiss* believe *kiss* it*kiss* took *kiss* you *kiss* so *kiss* long *kiss* to *kiss* realize *kiss* this, *kiss* you *kiss* prick *kiss*" Kurt said, kissing him everywhere on the face and lastly on the lips.
They just stayed there for a while, just rolling around in ground and kissing.
In the year 20-something, in the humble abode of Puckerman-Hummel, the signs were proudly hung over the crib of little Christopher Mark Puckerman-Hummel.
First: Fight
It was a secret kept by them, the girls, by Harold, Hummel's gardener (They rolled around the grass until dawn, what do you expect?)
It tortured Kurt. He loved Puck. And he wanted to show the world he loved him and that he loved him back. He wanted them to walk down the halls together without having to pretend they hated each other. He wanted to go out and rent a movie without Puck having to wear a hoodie and large sunglasses. He wanted them to go out and eat at McDonalds (Kurt's guilty pleasure.) without having to bring their friends. He wanted them to hold hands above the table not below. And most of all he wanted the whole world that Puck was his so they have to stop flirting with him every fucking second.
"Look, Kurt" Rachel said after Kurt ranted to the girls. "This is Puck we're talking about
"Yeah" Santana said "I mean, He wouldn't be flirted with if he didn't flirt back in the first place"
Kurt let out a sigh "I know" he said "But I just though, you know, maybe he's changed"
"PUH-lease" Quinn scoffed "No offense, honey, but Puck isn't really the best choice as a boyfriend. Especially if it's a secret."
"I guess" Kurt said. As soon as said that, the other guys entered the choir room.
"Sup, guys" Finn said, going to Quinn's side and kissing her on the cheek.
"Oh, BeeTeeDoubleyou" Mike said, as he sat next to Brittney "Party in my house on Friday"
Puck came in and suddenly all the anger washed away. That always happened to Kurt, he always wanted to confront Puck and his flirty ways but whenever he tried to all the anger goes away. And replaced with that stupid love sing grin. He's starting to really hate it.
They sat at the back. I guess I should be thankful, Kurt thought. I mean, I have a boyfriend. I'm in one piece and my hair line isn't receding. I'm lucky. Yet, He just couldn't feel that he was. His boyfriend is practically ashamed to be dating him. He still gets dumped in the dumpster by said boyfriend. And his hair was staring to get that stupid cow lick thing.
Okay, he was going to be honest. This was it. He was going to be honest. No turning back. He turned to look at Puck who smiled and interlock their fingers together.
Okay, Kurt thought. I'll do it later. I don't want to ruin the moment.
Kurt didn't go to Mike's party (his father was sick and he wanted to take care of him and the shop.) but Mercedes did take a lot of pictures on her phone.
"That's when we were dancing…That's when Brittney tried to teach everyone the Macarena…That's Finn and Quinn beating Rachel and Jesse at karaoke…"
"Mercedes, what's this?" Kurt asked, his voice unreadable
"Artie and Tina feeding each other chips. Why?"
"Not that. Background" Kurt said and zoomed the picture
"Oh, Hell to the nah!" Mercedes said. The picture was blurry and distinct. There was no doubt about it. "That's little bitch" Mercedes said "Don't worry, honey. I'll crush him"
"No need, M" Kurt said, his throat suddenly gone bone dry. "Can I borrow your phone?"
Kurt sent the picture to his own phone and marched to the girl who knew a certain Noah Puckerman quite well.
"Quinn!" Kurt said in a false cheery voice.
"Kurt, you okay? You have that psychotic twitch in your eye that Rachel always gets when she doesn't get the solo"
"I'm good" He said "So tell me, who is she?"
"That sonofabitch" Quinn said looking at the picture. "That's Katy, Puck's ex-girlfriend, His very first"
"Hey, Quinn?"
"Yeah, Hon?"
"He should tell me right?"
"Oh, Totally. If the kiss doesn't really mean anything he should be honest with you."
"Oh, okay. Bye" Kurt said, turning to the place he's sure to find Puck.
He peeked inside the choir room and sure enough, Puck was there with his guitar, practice the solo Mister Schue gave him.
"Even when I dream of you the sweetest dream will never do" He sung while strumming his guitar.
I shouldn't bother him, I mean, he practicing
No! Confront him now
But he's busy!
Okay, okay. Compromise. Give him the whole day to tell you, okay?
Fine
"Oh, hey. Kurt" Puck said, turning and breaking into a smile.
"Hey" Puck said, walking over, closing the door and kissing him on the cheek.
"So, how was your weekend?" Kurt asked
"Went to Mike's party. Awesome party"
"Erm. Met any interesting people?"
"Not really"
"Are you sure? No blasts from the past?"
"Uh, Yeah. You okay, Kurt? You seem jumpy"
"Uh, yeah. Of course"
The whole day Kurt waited for Puck to be honest. He sent him texts and calls but Puck said nothing other than what he said before. Kurt even skipped English to be with Puck during his daily trips to the nurse's office. Finally at the drive to Kurt's house, while ranting about coach Tenaka, Kurt blurted it out "ISawThePicture"
"What?"
"Stop the car!"
"What?!Why?" Puck asked, confused out of his ass.
Kurt stepped out of his the car and waked furiously down the side walk.
"I don't even know why you're so mad" Puck said driving next to Kurt. He thanked the heavens the street was empty
"I saw the picture, Puck"
"What picture?"
"Of you, at Mike's party, making out with Katy Greenwoodson"
"It didn't mean a thing!"
"Then why didn't you tell me?"
"I didn't think it mattered."
"Puck, you kissed a girl. OF COURSE IT MATTERS!"
"It's not like it meant anything"
"Yeah, you just kiss people for fun"
"Look, I'm a guy. I have needs. And frankly you're not satisfying"
"WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?! Do you expect me to spread my legs for you like a three dollar hooker?!"
"I don't need this shit" Puck said driving faster now
"And where the hell are you going?!"
"TO GO MAKE OUT WITH KATHY!"
"IT'S KATY YOU, DUMBASS"
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