Lining Normal

A Re-Write

Chapter 3 : Roses on My Cheek

Blair's POV

I was walking back to my dorm and found myself breathing quite slow, some kind of fresh beat in my heart, a flute of warmness. I looked down and saw my toes were crumpling inside my shoes and my feet were almost pointing to each other. I realized a horror in my basic mind.

"Oh God for Audrey Hepburn's dearest LBD please don't say," yes, Blair Waldorf has roses on her cheek. I am liking John Garner more than I should. With a sudden realization, I skipped a beat on my heart for that thoughts.

"Oh My God," disturbingly, I crashed my whole weight on my bed, pounced my face on the pillow. I stayed in the same position thinking the same thing over and over again, what is in John Garner? What is in him that puts roses on my cheek? Because he's a musician, no. Because he's a smooth talker? No, in fact he rather spoke everything in normal tone, or more correctly, annoying tone.

"I need someone," I searched in my bag for my freaking Berry. The fact that when I got my Berry and it suddenly jumps into a song gave me a good squeal of fright. "Jesus!"

I looked through the number, didn't recognize them and of course, I disconnected the line. I called my blonde best friend.

"Serena? I need you. ASAP. I mean freaking ASAP. Its 911 in the whole area and I don't know what to do!" I was panicking. Weird, this is the first time I've panicked over some boy. Maybe my meltdown in NYU has given me a less Blair Waldorf's vibe.

-Exactly an hour later-

"Blair?" Serena knocked on my door. I literally scratch the door open. "What in the wo…"

"S!" I hugged her, more than the usual tight I should. I know how she looked at me, like I was a kitten just escaped from a hungry dog.

"B? What is wrong with you? I mean escaping all of my phone calls after an overnight worry plus Dan, saying you are a little out of place now, what is going on? And who was that guy on your phone?"

"I skipped a beat!" I finally looked into Serena's eyes. "I skipped a freaking beat on him. Hell, he painted roses on my cheeks S! And no one but Chuck and Nate had painted roses on my cheeks!"

"What? Who are you talking about?" Serena held me up from falling. I know it seems dramatic to fall but my knees are starting to weaken.

"Urm," should I say his name or shouldn't I say his name? "He's um, his name is J.G." Even for his initials, I skipped a beat. What is wrong with you Blair?

"J.G? Who the hell is J.G?"

"He is uh, he is the one who answered your call, just before," and the whole memory of our conversation played in fast-forward in my mind. I shrink my thoughts away, and held my cheek. Roses on my cheek! Lord help me!

"And this guy, J.G, made you skipped a beat and paint roses on your cheek?" for others it might sound a little off but it was me and Serena's code. Only we can transport out telepathy together. "So, what is left for Chuck?"

"Chuck?" I didn't apply those in the previous calculation. All I ever notice were somehow my unusual feelings towards John. It was as if I was 13 again, finding my first love and giggling for that first boy I liked, gushing or rather dramatically worrying these beating in my heart and hard red roses painted on my cheek. And in all those anxiety, Chuck Bass has somehow vanished in the area, as if I have forgotten, Chuck Bass is my boyfriend.

"I didn't recall Chuck," I looked at the empty space between us. "I didn't remember him at all." Then I looked at Serena, worried. "What is wrong with me S?" I almost shed my tears and it wasn't for the dramatic effect, I was crying for something I don't realize in a long time. I'm losing Chuck.

He wasn't always there for me anymore. He was always out for his work, for himself. Assuring the world that he is better than his own father. He was on war with everything. And as the war does not coordinate well with me, we departed slowly. I haven't seen it till this day, that I am finding our spark out there in another guy. I might as well misunderstand the friendship spark I had John.

"I'm misunderstanding everything S," I looked up to my friend. "Chuck was missing, and I was alone and, John, he was nice." And he was just being nice, a comfy, no flirting moment of conversation between us. No, just two people sharing thoughts, and I haven't done that for awhile.

"B, I think you better talk to Chuck," Serena soothed my back but her words scares me. Talk to Chuck? What am I to say anything? If I ask him for my sake only, it would be selfish of me and to his selfish it causes me pain. Both of us are stubborn, and one has to give up for the war to end. But is it me who should as Chuck was fighting himself right now, to be something and foolish of me asking him to let go, when I was the one pushing him in yesteryear.

"Yeah, maybe I'll call him later," I looked down at my phone. Later seems so long at that time.

"Actually, he's right downstairs," this fact either surprised me or scare me, one of the two or both, I don't know. It was so mixed. "B, he's also worried about you. I mean obviously this J.G guy was just in the line of his life that somehow for a day includes yourself but Blair, I know you and I know Chuck, and I know you loved each other. What you and Chuck have are more than skipping a beat in your heart or paint roses on your cheeks, you're in love Blair. This is just; I promise you, a day or two that the devil finally tried to mess up your mind. You can go through it with Chuck."

At the time, her reasoning runs well in my mind as well as in my heart. I still do love Chuck, and we'll get through it. I just have to talk to Chuck. Discuss, like real in love couples do. But why am I not comfortable of all this. Something felt misplaced yet I counted all the right routes in this area, everything was perfectly nestled in their place, yet some unspoken value was there.

I went down from my dorm, and saw Chuck standing handsomely in front of the door. He looked at me, and I saw a relief drenching his expression. Without even a word escaping his mouth, he walked towards me and crushed my body between his arms. It was a comfort I missed. I closed my eyes so that all senses will only rapture to his warm heat. With a soft voice he said, "Hey."

"Hey," I realized that I was in fact glad I had him in my arms now, my heart stopped skipped and the roses on my cheeks have faded, which somehow surprised me a little that they were gone in a moment like this. But I feel love, the love that I have for Chuck, and for that, it was enough. "I'm sorry I worried you. I guess, its one of Blair's dramatic effect again." I don't know since when I make fun of myself, but it has to stop as Chuck pulled himself away to look at my face, to see if I'm alright.

"Blair, don't blame yourself for what happened. Its all my fault okay. I forgot. I went myself inside the company to much that I didn't realize, our anniversary. Our important most important day perhaps and I foolishly..." I stopped him from saying anything by planting my lips on his, as Chuck Bass doesn't do apologies and so when he does, it was meant from the bottom of his heart.

"So apparently eating strawberries inside an NYU dorm considers as an anniversary date?" Chuck asked before I chunked another strawberry inside his mouth to make him quiet.

"I like strawberries and I have announced a declaration that I am having renovations here and the room is for destructions," I bite a small strawberry before kissing Chuck again, leaving red stains beside his mouth. "I know the most delicious way for destruction." Chuck grinned and pushed me underneath him, kissing my neck and groping my body in all the right way.

Knock! Knock!

Of course, a moment so perfect was ruined by two simple knocks on the door. I was distracted, but Chuck clearly was not, bitting my neck smoothly. The distractions fade. But...

Knock! Knock!

"What?!" Chuck is distracted now, and was obviously a little angered. Chuck loses his temper easily nowadays.

"I'll get it, okay. This will take a minute," I pushed him gently, in parallel of comforting him to calm down. I walked towards the door, unlocking it and opened a little peak of who's there. A girl with tiny body but bigger than ever thick glasses. Do I know her? Uhh, no. "Who are you? What do you want? And you're kinda disturbing me. I'll give you 2 seconds because I'm nice."

"Do you know John Garner?" she asked so suddenly. For someone so petite she does have a very deep voice. But the more important question was, why was that name still engulfing my life when it was already resorted on the right way? She noticed my silence and stare. "Well, do you know the guy?"

"Well, no, but, em, yes. I don't know?!" whats with me, I'm stuttering. A Waldorf doesn't stutter! "What is it matter to you anyway?"

"Here," she held up a yellow flier. I took it from her and saw a headline of 'NYU On The Stage : Talentime'. "We heard him singing. He's good. He should enter. And I want you to ask him to enter."

I looked at her. "Are you kidding me? I don't know the guy THAT well. I mean he's okay as a singer, brilliant perhaps but.. but," I'm stuttering again. Why am I messing up my words for the guy? "Why don't you give it to him yourself?" Durh, is this girl stupid?

"I've tried," she said with a sour voice. "All the Talentime community have tried. He said no to each of them. And you're seem to be the only student he talks to on campus. So you must be someone near to him." Wait, what? I am the only student he has spoken to. I don't know why, but flowers were somehow blooming in my stomach and roses were slowly painted on my cheek. Jesus! What am I blushing for?!

"Listen, I don't think he'll..." I was not the straight up Blair Waldorf when I am talking about John. I pinched myself to relax, and told myself it will fade. Will it?

"Just ask him to audition and tell him it wont hurt trying. He's very talented and some of the music producers in New York are actually watching the stage that night. He might get signed, who knows. Its about bringing on the talent. A very rare opportunity of course," she said flatly. I know why John was not interested, I mean who will be if the promoter was talking so blatantly flat.

"I'm not saying 'Make sure he enters' but, it won't hurt if you ask him would it?" her question made me stop myself for a moment from any action. The part where 'it won't hurt' somehow carved in my soul. Would it? Why would it hurt? Who is John Garner to me anyway?

And so the last question stays with me, stayed so deep inside me even when I make love to Chuck.

I stared at the restaurant where I met John the first time. Its the only place I knew where to find him outside of campus. Chuck was already on his way back to his office after our 'session' in my dorm. He did asked me a whole lot of question after our 'session'.

"Who is this Garner guy?" he heard my conversation with spectacled girl and he caught the name too.

"No one. Just one of my class mate," I didn't lie. "She asked me to pass this to him." I waved the yellow flyer to him.

"And you being the only person he talks to? Sounded a bit different," Chuck were curious, he was supposed to. At normal rate, I would be happy, but since I think I am crazy now, its annoying with his questions.

"Thats because I asked him about that one question once," liar. "It was a one minute conversation," more like an hour. "And they thought we were like buddies after that. You know people," yeah, lying bitches.

"How is this guy's appearance?" good God Chuck stop with the questions!

"Fat, short and scary. Not at all nice," actually, John is very slender, 6 ft 2 maybe and definitely not scary, he's actually very good looking. And fairly, very nice despite the annoying attitude. Wait, did I just compliment him with a whole bunch of nice things! Blair you are kidding me!

Chuck stopped his questions after that. He looked like he trusted me, which I want to yell that he shouldn't have. But I wasn't about to ruin a sewn back relationship. Its like snipping a good sewing.

I am completely, utterly messing my head with reality now. Its too much and I have no idea what am I doing here, holding the yellow flier I was supposed to 'pass on'. But maybe its okay, just asking wont hurt, just a small other talk won't hurt. Why would it hurt?

I entered the restaurant, it was a bit packed. Of course, it was dinner time. I looked on stage, no one were on the mike. Now I wonder if John won't be performing tonight. Not expecting it, I was a little thrilled to have him singing again. He has a voice of an ange... Okay Blair, this going to stop this "Instance!" I yelled the last word out.

"Wow, Blair. Its much to be talking to yourself but here, you'll scare the kids away," I was startled by his musical voice. I looked back and saw John with his hand holding the tray and wearing an apron. He smiled. I obeyed myself a smile back, and genuinely too.

"What are you doing?" I asked, surprisingly casual. My nerve was gone, it felt good to talk to him again, somehow.

"I'm helping out," he placed the tray on the bar and turned himself to me. "Ruth had to go to the hospital. His aunt or someone got sick and..." he realized how I was estranged from anyone named Ruth. Do I know a Ruth? "The blonde, the small blonde who served you yesterday, or was it the day before yesterday. Sorry, I mix up my days sometimes." It kinda hurt that he didn't remember our first meeting. Not that I care!

"Well, it suits you. I mean, the apron and the tray, it really suits you," he chuckled at the comment and I found myself laughing along with him. His laugh was somehow contagious.

"Thanks," he replied sarcastically, rubbing his hands to the apron. "Anyway, what are you doing here?"

I realized I was standing like a dumb Barbie (at least I'm a Barbie with a good Channel on). I handed over of what seems to be a very crumpled yellow trash. I pulled my hand back, embarrassed by it. Must have twisted it due to my nerve, which I don't know why was it there.

"Sorry," I straightened the paper up, it wasn't ironed straight obviously but as long as he could read what's on it, I handed it to him. "Here."

He looked at me with a weird expression. "You're kidding me, right?" Why was I kidding? The fact that I came here to a place that is so low beneath my standard finding a guy who I just met just to pass him a flyer made by some weird girl with glasses, does it sound like a joke? On honest thought, it does.

He took the paper and scanned it, leaving a small laugh. "You've got to be kidding me. I mean I didn't count you as one of them."

"One of... them?" I didn't realize NYU has a cult now.

"The weird community who desperately needs entertainers for their forsaken show, surveying every inch of the student who apparently pinch a good note on singing, pressing pressure on those poor fellows in this entertainment bullshit?" he actually tore the paper off. "No thanks."

"Well, one, for sure is I have never ever heard of them till today so I'm not one of them. And two, you are being ridiculously negative about a community who may just wanna help you with the talent scout," when I said this, he somehow hiss during his forced smile. "And three, you have a great ta..."

"Hey you wanna hang out somewhere else?" he suddenly cuts my words. He loved to do that and it was annoying.

"What?"

"Hang out. Somewhere else. I mean Ruth's shift is almost over which means I don't have anything else to do tonight and yes, I'm kinda asking you out," he gave his goofy smile, innocently. How could he so smoothly ask me out like that?

"Urm..." okay, Blair Waldorf being speechless was totally surprising! If I was on a flirt mode it should be 'What do you have in mind?'. If I was saying no, it should be 'Next time okay, or maybe never'. If I was pressing a hell no, it should be, 'Only in your dreams but I would make a pact with the devil to have you not even making it to dream of me'. But I was speechless.

"Okay, its not like its gonna be a date or anything. Just hang out. As you see we have drunken fathers night on my right and first time beer chuggers on my left plus a very hectic restaurant on dinner time. I need a clear mind after working and I'm simply asking you to join in," he smiled. Of course, how could I accept his invitation as I knew he has other things on his mind.

So, I was following him, to his unfortunate bicycle. What?

"Are you sure it's safe?" I asked, looking at his somewhat falling into pieces bicycle. He gave me a look which says "Yeah." I wasn't confident. "What will happen if suddenly your seemingly rusted and almost dead bicycle here crash into lets say a white honey van like we have over there, do you think we'll still make it to tomorrow, in full?" He smiled, confidently nodding another "Yeah." Puts my confidence lower.

"Hey, don't pick on this baby okay. Its no Limo or whatever you rich kid climb on this days," I almost want to add on his rather sarcastic pressing on the 'rich kid' part but he overpower my words. "But this baby here, the rusted and almost dead bicycle is the one who brings me from one place to another. And I appreciate it for that." He smiled. Seems like he was genuine about it. Honestly, even if it was kinda weird, it felt sweet for him to feel that way.

Oh, stop it Blair! I don't even know what am I doing here! Why am I talking to him at this point?! Why did I say the damned 'Okay' to his invitation 10 minutes ago?! I should just go home right now! Go home Blair!

"Come on," he smiled and did I here pleading in his voice? "I promise you, if we crash, I'll be your Superman, swept you off your feet or something and fly you to a safe place. How's that sound?" He smiled, somewhat an assurance that he will protect me from hurt during the ride.

I believed him.

At the moment, I instinctively thought that he was a wizard who has his magic spell to drizzle me into confusions and kept messing my decisions, as I went sitting as his passenger, on his nearly dead bicycle, to somewhere I would never imagine I would center my feet on as a Waldorf.

I had to make a few changes as somehow I hated how I have written of John Garner's character in the previous chapter 3. Now it felt much better as this is the John Garner I have in mind since first. Reviews are pleasurably welcomed. Ideas shared are given gratitudes. Of course, it makes my heart break like Blair to have her torn between Chuck and John, as I love Chuck and my own John.