Jaspers POV

"Alice do you know anything that would help Jasper and I with the search?" Carlisle questioned her from his study; I could hear the faint tapping of the keys as he searched endlessly for new information.

I was sat crossed legged on the floor, surrounding completely by books, searching for any reference of a "Mary Alice Brandon" as Alice lay relaxing on our bed, propped up by about five pillows. So far I had come up empty handed and I was starting to get fed up with these books.

"Well I think I born around 1901 and I think it was Mississippi or somewhere and I had a little sister called Cynthia, her daughter, my niece is still alive I think in…." Alice gasped and I ran over and cupped her shocked face in my hands. "Biloxi…" She whispered, her voice mixed with emotions, sadness, fear and pain.

"Biloxi? So that means we have been so close to your old life and never realised it before?" I asked, wrapping my arms around her shoulders so her back was leaning on my chest, I wanted her to be safe and happy, not sad I thought as I ran my fingers through her soft hair.

"Hmm it would appear so… I just wonder how you didn't recognise Biloxi when you went that first time," Carlisle asked thoughtfully as he started typing faster now he had this new piece of information.

"Finished! I found it!" He called excitedly as I raced upstairs, cradling my fragile angel in my arms, entering Carlisle's study I carefully placed her next to Carlisle and leaned over her shoulder to watch, my arms firmly around her shoulders, anticipating her reaction. Alice leaned forward in order to read clearly the text on the screen and just stood there, staring at the screen in shock.

"Alice love? Breathe please! You're scaring me!" I practically begged, giving her shoulders a little squeeze.

"I'm ok, seriously, it's just a lot to take in you know," Alice breathed, turning around, "I'm going to have a lie down, it's a lot to think about," She said before turning round and dancing out of the room, leaving Carlisle and I watching her exit.

I folded myself into Carlisle armchair, resting my head in my hands. Through all the years I had seen and witnessed first hand with Maria and her army I had never ever felt so much pain like I did with Alice right now, it pained me just to see her sad, let alone her emotions practically screaming out in pain. She was doing so well to mask it from me so I couldn't worry but her emotions gave her away. I wish she would just get rid of it, end her pain and suffering, even though I wanted this child as much as her it was practically killing her in the process. She no longer danced gracefully around the house, laughing as I watched her spin from one room to the next with a smug grin on my face, she just shuffled or I carried her. We both know that we hated seeing each other in the way that I was now so we tried our best to hide it from them, but unfortunately I was better at it than her so I only saw me suffering in that position. I just wanted my bubbly little Alice back.

"Son? Are you ok? What's wrong?" Carlisle worried, coming over so he could rest his hand on my shoulder, holding it comfortingly, "Don't be scared, she is going to see this through, Alice is strong enough for all this. You know better than I do, she's going to be perfect and you will still have your wife and also a little baby." He smiled happily.

"I know that it just pains me to see her like this, I was raised to protect her from pain and suffering but I can't! I feel like such a failure, what has Alice done to deserve a monster like me?"

"No Jasper, you know that's not true, it's not your fault the way you were created and Alice loves you for who you are, scars and all and you both love each other dearly,"

"Are you sure about that Carlisle? I mean after all I have done, can anybody love that?" I wondered, but I didn't wait to hear his answer as I heard some healthy breathing that could only be Alice; I bolted out of the office and stood at the door. The thing that surprised me was that our door was always open unless one of us needed some space. I lightly tapped on the door but there was no answer and this worried me.

"Alice? Are you ok? What's wrong?" I begged, still no answer.

"Just break the damn door down Jasper! Show her whose boss!" Emmett called from downstairs, I heard a sharp slap before Emmett cursed loudly, "What the HELL was that for?!" Rosalie just huffed angrily at him.

"Shut up Emmett, how does Rosalie put up with you?" I laughed before turning back to the door, "Ok Alice if you don't answer me I'm coming in,"

There was still no answer so I slowly turned the handled and carefully pushed it open, curled up in our pale blanket was my little angel. What was she doing? I was about to rush over to her when I felt a hand rest on my shoulder, restraining me. I twisted around to face Edward who had a sad expression covering the features of his face.

"What are you doing Edward?! She's down!" I practically screamed at him, struggling under his grasp, he looked at me confused as Alice moved, the blanket falling to reveal bruises covering her sides. I stared in shock and pain at my damaged angel.

"What are you talking about Jas? She's sleeping remember? This is what turning back to human does to you, just let her rest," Edward murmured so Alice would not get disturbed as he exited from the room.

I slowly shuffled around the immaculate room to kneel down beside the bed, careful not to make a sound. She looked so peaceful while she slept like she had not a care in the world. I could now see how Edward watched Bella all those nights, it was fascinating and it felt that as if I took my eyes off her for one second something amazing would happen and I would miss it completely. I just sat there, not caring about anything else than watching her sleep, I was in my happy place.

(A/N) I AM SO SORRY IT'S TAKEN ME AGES TO UPLOAD! I HAVE BEEN SO BUSY AND HAVENT HAD MUCH TIME! APOLOGIESSSS!!! I HOPE YOU LIKE :D REVIEW!!! :) X