Hello, Hello!:) Man, it is actually surprising that this happened tonight. lol I spent my afternoon/evening at the Christmas markets in Manchester and trudged through rain and the cold, so naturally I fell asleep once I got home. lol But yes, then I woke up and will now have some dinner (at nearly 11 pm lol) and you guys get to read a new chapter! ;) Warning, this is seriously on the fluff side! lol And I hope this isn't boring you to death but I thought after "Again and Again" this was a nice change. My Lauren Lane fansite is going online tonight so I'll be giving you guys the link when I post the next chapter. :) Anyways, read and review please and make my life better!:)

Disclaimer: I own 30 Rock season 1 since today and a whole number of new Lauren Lane pics since yesterday...but that doesn't change the fact that these characters aren't mine!:( lol

Chapter 4: Pieces of Recollection

They had sat up on the couch and talked until midnight had come and gone. Niles had told her more about herself but eventually they had just ended up chatting about his duties and her health. When they had finally decided to call it a night he had walked her up to her room and softly squeezed her hand before disappearing down the corridor. And now she couldn't sleep, her pulse was still racing and there was an odd mix of emotions bubbling up inside her. She couldn't remember what they had been like before the accident, but she remembered how he had found her. His deep-blue eyes frightened, his hands warm and his voice pleading her to stay awake. She loved him, of that she was sure; every thrilling sensation was telling her so. Now she only needed to understand why he had been so distant and somehow she couldn't shake the feeling that her emotions weren't easily welcomed.

Her dreams that night bore traces of Niles, as if he had always been the main thread weaving through her life so subtly that even she hadn't noticed until now. The soft glow of the morning sun shone through the window and warmed her face, but she resisted the light and hugged the pillow tighter to her chest. She had had a dream a few moments ago, a dream so vivid that she could still feel it. Niles had been wearing one of his suits and she had been clad in a black evening dress, they had talked, but she hadn't been able to hear the words. Then suddenly, without warning, their lips had crushed together as their bodies had melted closer and closer. His mouth was hot and inviting but it was her who met his lips again and again, savouring each delicious sensation as if she had known that this wasn't likely to happen again. Her left hand rested against his cheek while her right was guiding him closer. He, in turn, had both his arms wrapped around her and the one placed on her bare back was burning her skin, driving her insane with the desire to feel more of him. But then he had let go, because he was aware that he didn't need to hold her anymore, that she was just as willing as he was to participate in this particular game.

"Miss Babcock?" a voice called and C.C. reluctantly let the dream fade away.

Someone harshly knocked on the door and opened it.

"I'm sorry," the butler said "you didn't reply so I..."

"It's alright," C.C. cut him off, sitting up in bed while adjusting her pyjamas.

"Are you ok? You look flushed." Niles observed and placed the tray he was carrying down on the bed.

"Yes, I'm fine. Just had a dream..." she mumbled, still not fully awake.

"I just came to change your bandage. Nurse Anna showed me how it's done, but if your wound looks infected I will have to drive you to the hospital." he explained and sat down next to her.

Slowly he lifted his hand up and tried to find the best spot to remove the bandage.

"Niles?" C.C. asked, her face only inches away from his "Have we ever kissed?"

His careful movements came to a sudden halt and his eyes that found hers instantly looked nervous. "What makes you ask that?" he finally managed.

"This dream I had...it was about us kissing here in the living room. Did that happen?"

"Yes," he quietly replied, blushing "about a year ago...we were both drunk."

C.C. swallowed and tried to hide the tears that were suddenly and inexplicably pooling in her eyes. It hurt her that he was embarrassed by the moment they had shared when she knew herself that, despite being drunk as he claimed, true passion had been there.

"That means you are beginning to remember something. Though why this would be the first thing I don't understand." he said, laughing softly but it only sounded fake.

"Maybe because it meant something to me." she suggested and Niles cleared his throat, placing the used bandage in a bag.

"Does it look disgusting?" C.C. asked when he had been staring at her wound for a while "They shaved my head, didn't they?"

She was right; although they had kept it to a minimum, only removing the hair that would've been in the way.

"Yes, but it is hardly noticeable." he gently replied and twirled a long strand of her blonde hair around his finger.

"Kiss me again!" C.C. demanded hoarsely, grabbing him by his shirt and pulling him closer.

The boldness with which the request was made reminded him briefly of her old self, before the words actually sunk in. He swallowed hard and felt his face heat up.

"I-I..." he muttered, uncharacteristically at a loss for words.

"Just wanted to see how you'd react," she lied, letting him go and laughing the situation off.

"Why would you do that?" Niles asked, trying to bring annoyance into his tone.

"Just trying to figure out if I want you," she replied innocently and grinned when his mouth fell open once more.

"I see," Niles mumbled pathetically and straightened his shirt.

"Oh will you quit looking so uncomfortable-" she began to scold but then suddenly broke off.

"What is it?" he asked, concerned.

"Nothing, I wanted to call you something...there was a name there...but before I could use it...it was gone again."

"Butler Boy," Niles explained automatically "that's your favourite nickname for me. Well, not...favourite...but most commonly used."

"Butler Boy," she repeated softly, running her fingertips along his jaw line "you're not a boy anymore though."

And under her appreciative gaze he found himself blushing once more.

"Will you stop playing with me, Babcock." he snapped, but couldn't help but smile when she let out the familiar throaty laugh.

"Alright, just finish my bandage then."

He reached for it and rolled a small bit open before gently resting his right hand on one side of her face again.

"You know, with your memory slowly returning, maybe I could take the day off and take you to certain places that you, well, used to know...maybe this'll jar your memory, though I'm not a doctor... don't know if that would be a good thing to do."

"I like it." she agreed, mainly because she liked that he wasn't so distant with her anymore "I will just go and have a shower and then get dressed and I'll meet you downstairs in half an hour?"

"Yes, that's fine." he agreed, finishing his work "Be careful though in the shower!"

"You're right, I don't know if I can handle that. Would you mind terribly to help me? You know: wash my back, hand me the towel..." she said, her voice very low.

"I will see you in 30 minutes," he said, ignoring her remark but more than that trying to ignore the familiar pulling in his groin this had provoked.

C.C.'s smile was radiant when she slipped out of bed and headed for the bathroom. It wasn't that he found her repulsive, of that she was almost certain now; she just needed to figure out whether he was simply embarrassed or if he was embarrassed because he liked her.

Niles, in the meantime, busied himself by trying to take deep, regular breaths, before he walked into his room to get his coat and shoes. Properly dressed he then went into the office to have a word with his employer. Maxwell was sitting by his desk, as usual, and staring at a script over the top of his reading glasses. He seemed more than usually tense and Niles wondered if something had transpired while he had been in C.C.'s room.

"Mr. Sheffield," he finally addressed the man "Miss Babcock is beginning to remember things. Nurse Anna apparently was right in assuming that I can help her trigger certain memories. So now she's asked me to take C.C. to her apartment and other places to see if she'll remember anything else."

Obviously this wasn't the truth but after the situation in C.C.'s bedroom he was rather reluctant to explain himself.

"Very well," Max said who, in fact, looked less than happy about it "but make sure you're back in time to cook dinner."

Niles sighed, thanked him, and was out of the door. Something certainly must have happened, because only two days before Maxwell had been willing to do everything in his power to help C.C. Crossing through the living room he found that she was already waiting for him by the stairs, buttoning up her beige coat over a blue blouse.

"Where are we going to first?" she asked.

"Your apartment." he replied, smiling at her "We'll take the town car."

"Ok," she agreed half-heartedly and, for the first time that day, looked shy and insecure again.

"Come on, Babs, it'll be fine. I'll be there with you." he promised and his heart began to beat rapidly when she slipped her hand into his.

The comfortable physical contact didn't last very long though because he had to drive the car and annoyingly, he found that he was missing her touch. They drove in silence for a couple of minutes until Niles managed to park right in front of her building. He jumped out and opened the car door for her as she would've normally expected him to, but now she merely looked at him confused for a second before she smiled gratefully. The doorman greeted them with a friendly smile but before he could've done so much as to ask how she was feeling (rumours easily spread in such a building) Niles had protectively wrapped one arm around her shoulder and guided her away.

"I live here?" C.C. finally managed, a little overwhelmed, as they rode up in the elevator.

"Yes, in case you hadn't noticed by the expensive clothes you're wearing and the Park Avenue neighbourhood, but you're rich." Niles replied, grinning cheekily.

"Now I'm beginning to understand why you were so insecure about our arrangement." she quietly said and it hurt Niles for a moment to think that she was embarrassed to have come here with him.

But then he realised that she actually just looked lost, as if she had difficulty grasping their different stations. She was silent from then on and carefully followed him and watched as he unlocked the door that led to her apartment. He simply stepped aside and allowed her to explore the place, see if any memories would return without him nudging her in a certain direction. After a while, when she had disappeared into her bedroom, he began to walk around too and check if everything was in order. He stood and admired her bathroom until she found him, sneaking up on him from behind and resting her head on his shoulder.

"It's beautiful, I wonder if I've ever had Sex in the shower, it's definitely big enough." she remarked curiously.

Niles stiffened almost immediately, seeing as it was bad enough to picture her naked in the shower, but to have her stand so close to him, her body pressing against his, it was becoming increasingly harder to breathe.

"Good God, Babcock, I know that you haven't been with a man in quite some time, but do you have to keep mentioning these things to me?" he barked and her warm chuckle helped nothing to diffuse the situation.

"Sorry, I'll blame it on the dream I had this morning." she replied and moved away "I found this in my bedroom."She then proceeded to say, holding up a picture frame. "There were a couple of other photos but I've already met those people. But I haven't met her, is she Maxwell's wife?"

Niles smiled sadly at the picture taken of Max and Sara on a family vacation, smiling happily into the camera.

"Yes, this is the late Sara Sheffield."

"She died?" C.C. asked, her voice suddenly vulnerable and close to breaking.

"She...she got into a car accident," Niles explained, his voice raspy too while he slowly walked back into the living room "and died at the hospital. Maxwell couldn't cope with her death for a very long time, as a matter of fact he only really started living again when Fran turned up at the door one day. The kids were also affected, of course, and while you made sure that the business continued to be as successful as it is, I looked after them and comforted them at night."

"Niles, this hurts really badly." C.C. whispered, her voice small and child-like as she rubbed her arm as if trying to rid herself of her feelings.

"I'm sorry, maybe I shouldn't have mentioned it." he apologised and forced himself to look into her moist blue eyes.

"No, it's just so...so much, you know? I don't know who she is, I can't remember what we shared together but it's like sense memory...this hurt is there and I can't explain it."

"It's alright," Niles tried to sooth her, having always guessed that she hadn't let herself grieve back then.

A lone tear got tangled in her lashes and then dropped to run down her smooth, pale cheek.

"She was wonderful and we all miss her." he quietly said and pulled her into an embrace.

C.C.'s arms snaked around his body and clung onto him as if her life depended on it. And all the while as he kept rubbing her back and whispering comforting words he fought the urge to kiss her, to take away her pain. Her body was shaken by sobs but when she finally pulled away only a light tremble indicated the sudden outburst. Once a Babcock, always a Babcock.

"Are you ok?" he carefully asked, stroking her cheek with his thumb.

"Thank you, Niles, for being here. This whole apartment scares me...it's so clean, so perfect, so empty. I can't believe that I lived here...Maxwell's home is much more alive. I think that, maybe, if it wasn't for you I would've been very unhappy."