More angst... i spent the best part of my night trying to get this chapter finished, more to come, hope you enjoy it!
Quinn went home that night and left me with my thoughts; my ingenious and brutal thoughts. I texted Brittany after Quinn left for some virtual company and distraction.
'Hey B, your song was seriously good today, I loved it.'
'Hi San :) thanks, it was for you.'
'Well considering you stared at me for the whole thing...'
'Yea it felt super good to sing to you, I was all tingly'
'Thank Quinn for helping you.'
'Already done, I gotta go to bed, mom says I need more sleep, but that's your fault. Bye S, love you xxx'
'Yea bye Britt, I love you too, always will xxx' With that I threw my phone away from me.
I lay there in silence and bleakness on my own. By the weekend this bleakness will all be over.
I got up the next morning with no stunning blonde lying next to me; that was disappointing. I got changed and exited my desolate house. I walked to school alone running through scenarios in my head. Brittany would do just fine. No she wouldn't what would she do without you? Quinn would take care of her. Not like you can, it wouldn't be the same. Brittany would get over it. No she wouldn't it would permanently hurt her; forever. Christ I was getting a headache from all this back and forth in my own head. I pinched the bridge of my nose as I made my way through the parking lot of McKinley High. Brittany's car was already there, I could picture her just standing staring at her locker. I picked up the pace and pushed the front door. As I walked in I heard shouts.
"She's here... do it now... do it dude."
I looked up instinctively to see red spray cover her. The crushed ice and corn syrup mixed and splashed her face and clothing. I watched in horror as she froze. Only the lowest of the low were slushied, this wasn't meant to happen to her. Brittany uttered one word and word only.
"Santana." She said in almost a whisper, but I heard.
I rushed to her aid, as she simply stood rooted to the ground. I wiped the excess slush from her face and swept her hair off her face.
"I'm here." I said in a soft voice as I took her shaking hand.
I led her towards the girl's bathroom and we were followed. The jeering was unending and the taunts were overused. The boys fumbled over one another to get the remarks heard. I drove Brittany in the door and I hung back for a moment.
"I hope you're all happy, you just made the nicest girl in school cry." My voice cut like a knife through butter. "Your all gonna pay because dudes your bad karma points are just adding the fuck up." MY empty threats wouldn't hold out for much longer.
They were silent; for a half second. "I'm pretty proud of us; we're here to teach a lesson Lopez. We're not going stop until you do."
To this they shook hands with each other and congratulated themselves. I tried my hardest not to look defeated, Santana Lopez was never defeated, right? So I used the old reliable line.
"I'm not even gonna dignify that with a response." I said as strongly as I could before I pushed through the bathroom door and checked on Brittany.
I walked in to see her huddled in a heap on the ground. I wanted beat the crap out of those guys and then I wanted to cry and after that I wanted to drink myself into oblivion. She shivered and her breath hitched. She needed fresh clothes and to wash her face and hair. I slowly made my way over to her.
"Britt?" I said as I sat down on my knees in front of her.
"..."
"Brittany, please just look at me." I whispered as I used my hand to tilt her head upwards.
"You know, Rachel's right, the only good about being slushied is that no one can tell that you're crying." She said in a complete deadpan.
"I can tell B." I sighed.
Suddenly the door flew open and before I had time to react with a scream two people knelt beside me and there was a hand on my shoulder. Kurt and Mercedes each took one of Brittany's hands and I turned to see Quinn looking down at me. I stood back from Brittany to let the two Glee diva's work to help her from their experiences. They were looking after her like I couldn't. Why was Brittany even with me? Quinn hugged me close as I stood up. I looked over to find Berry pacing furiously. I wanted so desperately to laugh but I couldn't, I physically couldn't.
"We need to get this girl some clothes." Mercedes announced.
"I agree that crushed ice really soaks all fabrics." Kurt added.
"There are clothes in my locker but I'm not leaving her." I muttered.
"I'll go grab 'em" Mercedes says as she makes her way out.
I sat down beside Brittany and laced her fingers in mine. I turned kissed her on the cheek. She was still shivering so I put a loving arm around her, letting her know I was there.
"Do you wanna wash up?" I suggested.
Brittany nodded and I helped her up. I got some tissue paper and wetted it under the tap. I dabbed her face where the corn syrup was most prevalent. I then began to clean her neck as Mercedes returned with my duffel bag. I thanked her and took it. I caressed Brittany cheek and looked into her eyes. There it was; the look. The look of complete, utter and unmistakable hurt. It wrenched my heart in a vice grip and squeezed it so tight I forgot to breathe.
"Do you want help?" I offered as I held up the bag to Brittany.
She shook her head and took the bag and ambled towards one of the stalls to change. Then I felt all eyes turn to me. Even Berry stopped pacing to stare. Mercedes patted me on the shoulder and gave me a knowing look. Kurt gave a sorrowful nod and flipped his hair. Quinn gathered me up in another hug.
"It'll get easier." She whispered into my ear.
"No it won't." I shot back and pulled out of the hug.
Rachel stood still and gave me a faint smile. That smile... pity. I was getting pity from Rachel 'Queen of the Jews' Berry. Holy fuck when had my life decided to fuck itself up? Brittany returned from the stall in my sweats and my tee. I kissed her on the forehead and wrapped my arm back around her.
"Take her back to your place Santana." Quinn ordered. I nodded and turned back to Brittany.
"Is that ok with you." She simply nuzzled herself into the crook of my neck.
"Alright well umm... thank you guys." I said slowly, it felt weird to thank people who weren't Quinn, Brittany or the chef at Breadsticks.
Kurt held his hand up as we tried to leave. He peaked his head out the door and swivelled back around.
"All's clear ladies, may I suggest coco, it always makes me happy."
I looked down to watch Brittany's featured contort in to a childish smile. I mouthed a 'thank you' to the boy and he just flipped his hair, again, and smiled smugly. Thank the Lord, she smiled, all was going to be well. I escorted her out of the bathroom and down the empty hall. We walked to her car and I asked for the keys. She gave me another small smile when I opened the car door for her I drove her back to my house. My parents had called the other day; their conference blah blah blah medicine is important blah blah blah have to stay longer. More Brittany time I guess.
I told Brittany to have a shower and I gave her some towels. She went upstairs and I heard the sound of water pound through the nozzle. I made my way to the kitchen and started on the coco. I warmed the milk, added the powder and a little sugar. I kept it warm until I heard the water stop then I poured it into two mugs and added the tiny marshmallows she loved. I sat down at the table and draped my hands around my hot mug.
Brittany came through the door in a new outfit on and her wet hair hanging in waves around her shoulders. She looked so hot. She didn't even have to try and just wanted to push her up against the counter and-
"Do you want to sit inside?" She asked quietly.
"Sure." I said as I snapped my mind back from the gutter.
I got up and went to the living room with her. I set my coco down on the coffee table and lay down on the couch patting the space in front of me. She lay down focused on her mug, trying not to spill the contents. I snuggled into her and ran my fingers through her damp hair.
"Are you ok?" I questioned.
"I guess so; it's just that stuff is so cold." With that I wrapped an arm around her waist and she took a swig from her mug.
"I'm sorry Britt, for everything."
"It's not your fault San." She said turning to face me.
"Yea it is Britt, everything's just..." I trailed off not knowing what to say.
"Everything will be fine." And there it was that flicker in her eye again; the look. She was hurting and still not saying anything.
"I hope so baby." I smiled at her. That fake Cheerio's smile I had perfected so much so that not even Brittany could see through it.
I kissed her on the forehead a couple of times and once on the lips. I let her get back to her coco while I thought.
No more hiding hurt for Brittany if you left. Then again she couldn't tell anyone anything. She'd find someone. Nope no one would want to take on the train wreck she'd become. I literally hated my brain right now. But then it had yet another idea. Actions speak louder than words and in Glee singing was the loudest action. Lopez you are one clever motherfucker. Sing what you can't say.
Singing in the next chapter... review?