Author's Notes:
Here's another chapterr (: This one's extremely dark, though. Whatever the story's rated for is probably in here. Yep, yep.
Before I forget, I want to thank TimelessTears, not just for the only review on chapter 2 (lol, I feel like I'm reliving the old days xD) but also for helping me with the new summary O: Gosh, TT, I really owe ya one, to say the least. I really love the new summary (: So let's all give a round of applause to TimelessTears! *standing ovation xD*
This chappie's really symbolic. Pay extra attention to all the words if you want to understand. It's vague if you just read the words, but the back-backstory will become very clear in your mind if you read carefully.
So yep. Hope you guys won't try to kill yourselves after reading all the dark stuff in here. Have fun?
Whatever's in italic is the nightmare sequence, and whatever is not is the normal present sequence. Un-italicized words and sentences in the nightmare sequence are thoughts or point-outs. And Grimmjow's 15 in the nightmare sequence, making Ulquiorra 16. Just so I could cover more timeline than just "three weeks ago", for example.
Warning: Chapter contains blood, violence, mentions of implied rape, abuse, needles, extreme OOC-ness and squelchy kind of violence, the type that makes you shudder and cringe like when someone scratches their nails on a blackboard.
Dark. It was completely dark around him. The pressuring darkness seemed to close up and swallow him as he walked through the cold stone hallways of Las Noches. His wide eyes darted left and right, as if expecting something to jump out of the shadows and eat him.
The newest addition to the Espada hurried as he got closer to Aizen's chambers. He had just come back from a mission and had been informed that Aizen had already retreated to his quarters for the night. He would have liked to put his report off, but if he didn't hand it in immediately, Aizen would get mad.
And according to the other Espada, Aizen was not a pretty sight when he was angry.
Almost dragging his feet behind him, Grimmjow stopped in front of Aizen's room. For a moment, he thought that the lord of Las Noches had gone to sleep already as it was very late and there no sound inside.
He was about to call it quits when suddenly, the door opened, Aizen's head appearing through the crack. He was shirtless and only wearing a white hakama, obviously getting ready to go to bed.
Grimmjow's eyes fell as the imposing figure raised a brow. He was new in the Espada and the rules of Las Noches, so he kind of panicked when Aizen reached out and grabbed his chin, tilting it upwards to make him look straight into his eyes. Teal met cold brown, and he shivered. Something about his new master wasn't quite right.
"Well?" he suddenly questioned in a soft, yet insistent tone. "Will you stand there all night or will you report?"
"H-Hai A-Aizen-sama Sir!" The Sexta Espada stumbled over his own words as the grip on his chin got tighter.
Feeling extremely uncomfortable, he shook his head a little and let Aizen's hand fall. He immediately lowered his eyes again, catching a hint of red he had previously missed on Aizen's hakama.
His eyes widened as he recognized blood. Fresh blood.
"I'm waiting for your report, Sexta."
"O-Oh, w-well, all went well. We successfully infiltrated Rukongai's 67th district and caused havoc long enough to allow Gin-sama to enter Seireitei unnoticed." Grimmjow gulped down in fear as he spotted the bored look in Aizen's eyes. "We had two casualties in our group, two Adjuchas... But we killed 3 shinigami in the fight that followed." He finished.
"I see." Aizen smiled lightly, running a finger over Grimmjow's sweaty cheek. The latter shrank under his demanding touch and blushed. "Thank you for your report, Grimmjow. It's late now, so come on in and spend the night here instead of walking halfway across Las Noches to your own quarters." He suggested in a soft tone.
"N-No thank you A-Aizen-sama S-Sir!" Grimmjow shook his head, eyes falling once more on the blood on his master's clothes. "I-I'm not that tired, s-so I figured the walk w-would help me g-get a little drowsy." He stammered, nervously rubbing the back of his neck and subconsciously stepping back a bit.
"Alright." Aizen dropped his hand. "Good night, Sexta." He wished with a slight smile, closing the door in his face.
The silence returned, and the cat-like Espada decided he hated it already. Trying to flee the darkness, he started walking towards his quarters when suddenly, a loud pain-filled scream rose from Aizen's room. It made the hairs on the back of his neck stand and he subconsciously started walking faster until he was practically running. The hauntingly familiar voice of the screaming person was reverberating in his head, refusing to get out.
He didn't know the other Espada so well yet, but he was sure he'd heard that voice at one of the meetings before. Yet he couldn't quite put his finger on who it belonged to.
But then again, when he thought about it, he didn't even really want to know.
...OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...
His legs were shaking beneath him as he forced himself to walk towards Aizen's throne room. He knew why he'd been called. Two months in the Espada, and he'd already failed a mission. How insulting.
It wasn't a secret to anyone why he was being summoned.
Not even him.
Gulping down, he put a shaky hand on the knob and pushed it. The door creaked towards the inside, the rusty metal squeaking on its hinges.
"Try not to die." Nnoitra passed behind him with a snicker, but Grimmjow totally ignored it. He had to stay strong. He had to.
With a deep breath, he entered the throne room.
His footsteps clattered on the tiled floor, the soft sound echoing around the room. It seemed like forever before Grimmjow made it before Aizen, and even there, time seemed to stop as his master stared at him intently.
Just the thought of the ex-shinigami's gaze scouring his body had Grimmjow shivering, so he couldn't help but fiddle a little. Finally, after finishing the analysis of the young 15-year old Arrancar in front of him, Aizen switched his position on his throne and sighed.
"Grimmjow Jaegerjacques." His piercing glare seemed to drill holes in him. Unable to hold his gaze up, the young Espada lowered his eyes. "I suppose you know why you've been called here."
"Yes Sir." Grimmjow tried answering as firmly as possible.
"And why is that, Grimmjow?" the Arrancar didn't know why his master was so insistent on saying his name, but it made him antsy. He didn't like it.
"B-Because I failed you, Aizen-sama." He gulped down nervously.
"Not only that, but you also lost two complete Fraccion, severely wounded one of my best Privaron and failed to bring back any worthwhile results. I'm disappointed in you, Grimmjow." Surprisingly, the teal-eyed Arrancar didn't feel guilty, but anxious.
"S-Sorry, Aizen-sama." He whispered under his breath.
"Ah, Grimmjow... I wish I could forgive you that easily... But you and I both know I can't."
Here it comes.
"I'm sorry to say you have abused my trust and do not deserve a higher position, nor the power to lead missions yet." Aizen got up, looking down on him with an evil smile. "Now, suffer the consequences of your incompetence."
It only took a second. Aizen's horrifyingly immense reiatsu flared out, freezing the Sexta Espada for just a moment before sending him to his knees, panting for breath. Grimmjow's eyes widened in horror as he clawed at his chest. It was getting harder and harder to breathe, his chest feeling like it was getting crushed by a thousand tons of cement.
He wheezed and struggled to breathe as Aizen drew his zanpakuto, raising it high over his head. No words we exchanged as the sword came down, meeting the flesh on Grimmjow's right side. The Espada immediately started screaming as the blood dropped onto the ground with a series of splats.
Far from fading, the screams continued until Aizen tipped his subordinate's chin up with his sword, watching with sadistic pleasure as he clutched his side and struggled to breathe, unshed tears glistening in his pained teal eyes. The brown haired man slowly slid his zanpakuto over the soft skin of Grimmjow's cheek, watching as a thin trail of blood trickled down and dripped on the floor.
As soon as he removed the blade, Grimmjow's head dropped back down thanks to the immense reiatsu, his back arching in pain. Aizen snickered and put the tip of his blade to his lips, gently licking some blood off of it.
"You are one of the most amusing Arrancars in the Espada, Grimmjow." He chuckled as if he'd told a joke.
Grimmjow didn't reply, but did make an effort to put his head up, glaring at Aizen and trying to look a little defiant. That little rebellious glint in his teal eyes was what prodded at Aizen's line between pleasure and overdoing things. He smiled, and in a swift movement, swung his zanpakuto down again.
The world seemed to stop as the metal met flesh again. Grimmjow's eyes widened, and bile rose up in his throat. The reaction to the pain was delayed as he only felt the mind blowing agony once he fell on his stomach. The back of his left ankle was on fire, and he didn't even need to look to realize he wouldn't be walking again for a while.
Grimmjow screamed with everything he had as one part of his left Achilles' tendon snapped. It didn't bleed much as it was a tendon and not actual muscle, but the blue-haired Arrancar figured he would have preferred having a muscle cut than a tendon. Stars were dancing in front of his eyes, and he felt sick, like throwing up. He barely even noticed when Aizen dropped his reiatsu and sat back down on his throne, sheathing his sword.
"Now Grimmjow, I hope you learned your lesson." The words were like slurs to him as his head spun. "Now you know what happens when you fail me and do your best to succeed, right, Grimmjow?"
Grimmjow cursed under his breath but knew that if he said what he really thought of the situation, he'd probably just die. So instead, he settled for nodding weakly.
"I'm happy we're on equal terms now. You're dismissed." Aizen smiled.
Fake smile.
Grimmjow growled as he tried getting up, realising he was on his own. Fake smiles. He'd seen a lot of those in one lifetime. And he hated them, he hated seeing people smile for lies.
He hated them.
He hated Aizen.
Panting, he got up on one shaky leg, doing his best to clutch his side and keep his balance at the same time. He slowly hopped away, wincing with every breath he took. Even with Szayel's help and high speed regeneration, it was almost assured that he would be hurting for at least a week or so.
It felt like a huge weight had been taken off of him when he exited. Now in a shock-induced daze, Grimmjow fell to his knees, panting. A loud scream built up in his throat and he felt like his lungs would explode if he didn't release the pain.
Giving in to the agony, he yelled one last time, long and hard, evacuating all the pain in his heart. Panting, he swung his head back down, bile rising up in his throat. Feeling his consciousness dim, he threw the organic liquid up, and, feeling tired and weak, he fell to his side, the world fading to black.
...OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...
Grimmjow was alone in the hallways again. Sighing, he shoved his hands in his pockets and muttered something unintelligible as he walked slowly.
Suddenly, his eyes noticed something in the corner, and he turned his attention towards the thing –or person, as he noticed-.
As he got closer, he made out black hair, a white helmet-like mask and white clothes.
"Ulquiorra." He called experimentally. What surprised him was the Arrancar's reaction.
The Cuatra whipped around and shrank, almost whimpering.
Yes, the almighty Cuatra Espada almost whimpered.
Which was the first sign in Grimmjow's eyes that something was wrong, oh so wrong.
"Hey, what's up?" he asked casually as he approached him.
"Don't hurt me..." was all the green-eyed Arrancar whispered.
Grimmjow blinked for a moment and then raised a brow.
"What?"
"D-Don't hurt me..." the Espada repeated, sniffling and clutching the big column holding up the ceiling like it was his life.
"Why in hell would I want to hurt you?" the Sexta sighed, rubbing his forehead. Something was definitely not up with Ulquiorra. "Now who are you and what have you done with Ulquiorra?"
The latter's eyes darkened and saddened considerably, and for a moment, Grimmjow wondered if Aizen had hurt Ulquiorra as well... Just like he'd hurt him a couple of weeks ago. His left ankle still ached just thinking about it.
"I was asking myself that..." the sad Arrancar whispered, looking away. "This can't be me... I am not Ulquiorra Cifer... I am not the Cuatra Espada..."
"Hey, calm down." The teal-eyed Espada sighed and looked down at the smaller Espada. Maybe he'd just been up all night and was really really tired? Or was sick and was acting extremely out of character?
"We can't go on like he wants us to, Grimmjow." The Cuatra suddenly whispered.
"Aha, I knew it. Where did he hurt you?" Grimmjow nodded, trying to lift some of Ulquiorra's pain off his shoulder. He had only just entered the Espada two months ago, but Aizen had already stolen his innocence. He didn't want the other Espada to suffer too much either.
"Here..." Grimmjow's eyes widened in confusion and surprise as Ulquiorra gripped the cloth over his heart and stared down.
"Ulquiorra." The blue-haired Espada sighed. "We're Arrancars. That makes us part Hollow. And Hollows don't have hearts."
"That's exactly what he wants to make you believe." The urgency in Ulquiorra's whispers worried the Sexta Espada as the Cuatra had never before shown his fear and worry so openly. "But we can't live without them, Grimmjow."
"Without what?"
"Feelings." He clutched his clothes tighter. "He wants us to forget what feelings mean, throw them aside and discard them. But we can't do that. If we can't feel anymore, how will we know what's right and what's wrong? We'll lose our conscience, and we'll only become his mindless puppets." He shook his head.
"True... To a certain point as it's coming from you, the cold Espada, as they all call you." The cat-like Espada shrugged.
"We've broken parts of our Hollow masks, but that doesn't mean we're through... Now, we have to strive to keep up another mask, because if we break this one, it's all over... I already have a mask I constantly wear, but sometimes, it just gets so hard to keep it up, I just wanna drop it and scream..."
Grimmjow's gaze softened as he watched the older Arrancar shudder. Even if something was wrong with Ulquiorra... His words seemed to come deep from the heart. And in a sense, they rang true and pure in his own heart.
"There's nothing wrong with letting go, you know." He commented, still somewhat surprised he was having a civilised conversation with the half-delirious Cuatra.
"Not when he's watching... He's always watching..." the bat-Espada shivered.
"Ah, touché..." Grimmjow muttered under his breath, shuddering as he realized the truth behind those words.
"Just keep on believing and feeling... And you'll be alright." The Cuatra nodded gently, smiling sadly.
"Seriously, what is WRONG with you, Ulquiorra? We're having a civilised conversation and you haven't even called me trash once!" the Sexta sighed, putting one of his hands to the Cuatra's pale forehead, the other to his own.
He winced as he felt the heat and pulled back. Surprised by the caring gesture, Ulquiorra looked up at him with big emerald eyes, and suddenly smiled.
"There is no need to wear your mask when you're among friends, right? All you need to do is slide it back on when you go out to see the world." He commented before letting go of the pillar and walking off.
Or... limping off.
"Hey, need help getting to your room?" Grimmjow yelled after him, noticing the severe limp.
"No one asked you, trash." Ulquiorra suddenly turned back, blinking neutrally at him before limping back off.
Grimmjow stayed there, incredulous, for just one moment, before he realized that Ulquiorra had gone out to meet the world.
"A mask, huh...?"
Taking a deep breath, the Sexta Espada cleared his eyes of emotion and started walking.
If a mask was what it took to keep his heart intact...
Then a mask he would wear.
...OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...
Gosh, his head hurt. He didn't think he had ever gotten a headache THIS bad before. Groaning in pain, he opened his eyes, trying to clear the blurs. Although he didn't even need the shapes to become clear to freak out. The colour scheme of his surroundings was enough.
"Ah, you're awake."
Grimmjow stiffened. That voice. That despicable, hateful, arrogant voice...
"Aizen-sama..." he forced out with a huge effort.
"Ah, Grimmjow, you're fully conscious of your surroundings then?" Aizen smiled, making the Espada's blood boil.
That despicable fake smile again. He hated it, wanted to just tear it right off his face. Given the chance, he wouldn't even hesitate.
"Well, I guess I should tell you what you're doing here today."
Grimmjow made a move to get up, but found resistance. His eyes widening, he looked up and spotted metal glinting over his ankles and wrists.
"What's going on?" he immediately asked, already starting to panic.
"Ah, if you would let me finish, I could tell you." Aizen rolled his eyes. "You're here today because we're testing a new high-speed regeneration solution I had Szayel create. It'll serve us well if the Espada ever need high speed regeneration on the battlefield. And apparently, it will only work if the Arrancar had human-like functions, and so, I chose you... Since you are one of the most enduring Espada and were pretty much the only one open." He shrugged like it was nothing.
"So basically, I'm a lab rat?" the teal-eyed Espada gaped incredulously. Is this what he had been reduced to? An experiment? A person whose only purpose was to test things?
"That's a very vulgar term, but if you want it that way, then yes." A sadistic glint shone in Aizen's brown eyes as he grabbed a box full of individual shots. "Now, let's begin, shall we?"
Grimmjow gulped down as he looked at the needle Aizen brandished. He'd never liked needles, and now he was expected to put up with a whole box of them?
"To use high speed regeneration, first, you must be hurt, of course..."
Of course there was a loophole. Grimmjow knew it. Today was DEFINETELY not his day. He braced himself as Aizen pulled out a small knife.
"Here we go..."
Before he registered it, the knife slashed over his chest, making a shallow, but stinging wound over it. Grimmjow simply winced at this, especially when Aizen lowered the needle.
His eyes widened as he was injected with the red liquid. He didn't know what was inside those needles, and preferably didn't even wanna know. All he knew was that it burned. A lot.
Biting his lip, he gave a sharp tug on his wrists, the cold metal of the shackles biting into his skin. To his relief, though, the small wound started mending itself.
"Stabs..."
And Aizen stabbed him in the shoulder, all the way across, making him choke on a gasp. And then the needle and the strange liquid again. The stab wound healed instantly, making it look like it had never been there.
The cycle seemed to go on forever. Grimmjow only found the activity excessive when Aizen punctured his lung to see if it closed damaged organs.
As if fate was against him that day, it didn't. So he was left choking on his own blood, struggling wildly as the liquid coursed fire through his veins, the metal cutting into his wrists and ankles and making more blood drop.
"Deep slashes..."
Pain... Needle... Fire... Slight effect. More pain.
"Bruises..."
Pain... Needle... Fire... Effect... More pain.
"Broken ribs..."
Pain... Needle... Fire... No effect... More pain.
"Let's see about severed body parts..." Aizen's eyes glinted maliciously as he steadied one of Grimmjow's shaky hands.
"S-Stop!" the latter screamed, horrified with where this was going. If this went on, he'd be cut to little pieces to see if the liquid could put him back together!
"It's all for science, my dear Grimmjow." The lord of Las Noches fake smiled again, making the blue-haired Espada grit his teeth. Fake smiles... Fake smiles again and again and again... He despised them, he really did.
"No it's not. It's just for your own personal sadistic enjoyment."
"A-Aizen-sama, I-I don't think the liquid will be able to re-grow a limb if it couldn't fix a broken rib." He coughed out, splattering blood all over his ruined clothes.
Aizen stopped for a moment, then grabbed a fistful of Grimmjow's messy blue hair, pulling his head up and slamming it roughly back down on the metal table. The unfortunate Espada breathed sharply as his forehead got wet, a crack in his skull causing a huge flow of blood.
Predictably, he was stabbed with a needle right afterwards. His arms were now covered in bruises where the needles had been inserted, and he felt disgusting just feeling the welts on his skin throb in pain. He choked on the agony once more then sighed as the crack in his skull was healed.
"Head wounds, full effect..." Aizen wrote down on a bloodstained pad he kept with him to keep track of his experiments. Now Grimmjow felt like throwing up as he watched the smile on Aizen's lips. He really was enjoying himself, the sick bastard.
"P-Please stop, A-Aizen-sama..." Grimmjow moaned in pain, not sure how much more of this humiliation he could take.
"Stop begging like a worthless little human and take it like a man." The latter sighed.
Tears of frustration welled up in the corners of the teal eyes, threatening to spill. Why wouldn't anyone listen to what he said? Why wouldn't anyone even acknowledge his worth? Why did everyone treat him like some kind of tool?
And what really got him frustrated was the fact that he didn't know how to answer to those questions.
"S-Stop..."
"Grimmjow."
"Please just stop."
"I'm warning you."
"Enough is enough!"
"Grimmjow. Shut up."
The Espada's eyes widened in surprise as he stared at his master. It was the first time he had ever heard Aizen insult someone like that. Usually, he settled for making it look like he cared for his subordinates, but now... he'd actually told him to shut up.
The new revelation made him gulp down, especially when Aizen leaned in onto him.
"Are those tears I see?" he suddenly asked, very cool about this entire situation.
"N-No Aizen-sama!" Grimmjow gulped down nervously, blinking rapidly to clear the tears massed in the corners of his eyes.
"You know I don't take kindly to open weakness, Grimmjow."
"I-I'm not crying, Aizen-sama!" Grimmjow protested.
"Enough lies, Grimmjow. You're too young. That explains why you still feel pain." Aizen turned towards him. "I will see that you don't feel anymore. Feelings will only hinder your judgement."
"He wants us to forget what feelings mean, throw them aside and discard them. But we can't do that. If we can't feel anymore, how will we know what's right and what's wrong? We'll lose our conscience, and we'll only become his mindless puppets."
"I'll help you get rid of those feeling. I'll desensitize you to pain."
"We're Arrancars. That makes us part Hollow. And Hollows don't have hearts."
"That's exactly what he wants to make you believe."
"By the time I'm done with you... You will never scream again." Aizen grinned sadistically, making the young Espada's heart pump faster. Oh Kami, what now?
The answer came to him in the form of a whiplash. He didn't even know –or wanna know- where Aizen got his whip so quickly, but it was real alright, and it stung terribly every time it slashed open his skin.
"Forget the pain."
Tears welled up again.
"Cast your feelings aside."
Ulquiorra had been right all along.
"Give yourself over to me."
Gosh, he needed a mask, and STAT.
"Your soul is dead, you only live to serve."
When he thought about it, it really was hard to keep up his mask.
"If you empty your mind..."
He had to try.
"Only then will you become strong."
Only then would he become strong.
"AAAAAAH!"
...OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...
"AAAAAAH!"
Shooting up, Grimmjow checked his surroundings. White, white, everything was white! It made him crazy.
"Grimmjow."
Panting, he turned around a bit, and grabbed his arms, feeling for any bruises or bumps where needles had been inserted recently.
"Grimmjow, calm down."
His hand met with something made of metal inserted in the crook of his left elbow, and his mind instantly reeled in panic. Through the delirious haze covering his eyes, he made out an IV needle.
Oh gosh, a needle.
Grabbing it roughly, he was about to rip it out of his skin when suddenly, something impacted his forehead, clattering to the floor right afterwards.
Slowly, he breathed in deep and exhaled to calm himself down, and let go of the IV, blinking and looking towards the person who'd thrown the metal thing at him.
"U-Ulquiorra..." he whispered, watching as the older Espada sighed and sipped some soup out of a bowl.
"Are you completely calm or must I chuck another spoon at you?" the green-eyed Arrancars snickered lightly, sipping some more.
"W-Where did you get that?" Grimmjow's stomach rumbled loudly at the smell of food and his mouth started watering almost instantly.
"Kurosaki brought it to me a few minutes ago. He should be back to check on you soon so you can ask him some when he gets back." He shrugged.
"You're just greedy." The Sexta accused.
"No, I'm hungry." The Cuatra shrugged in return.
Just as Grimmjow was about to reply, the door slid open and Ichigo walked in, a bored look on his face and -to the Espadas' delight- a pot of soup and some bowls on a tray in his hands.
"Ah, sleeping beauty's awake I see." He greeted as he walked in.
"Watch it Kurosaki." Grimmjow growled, crossing his arms.
"Hey, hey, respect. I treated you, gave you a roof to sleep under and am going to feed you. The least you could say is good morning." The teenager sighed out, irritated.
"Fine." Grimmjow mumbled. "Good morning."
"Actually, it's good afternoon, but whatever." Ichigo snickered as he put the tray down on the counter and headed for Grimmjow.
"But you just said-"
"I said whatever." Ichigo rolled his eyes as he roughly grabbed Grimmjow's left arm, inspecting the half-pulled needle. "You pulled it out?" he asked in a desperate tone.
"I-I..." Grimmjow blushed. "I didn't know..." it was the only thing he found he could say.
"Fine, fine, just calm down. It's an IV, for your information, and yes, it IS supposed to be sticking in your arm. It's fluids. It'll help dilute your blood and get it to flow faster to help you heal faster." Ichigo explained as he gently pulled the needle out, grabbing a new one to replace it with.
"He doesn't like needles." Ulquiorra explained briefly as he sipped some soup, making Grimmjow's stomach grumble again.
"Shut up, no one asked." Grimmjow blushed in embarrassment as Ichigo cleaned the tip of the new needle, hooked it up to a new bag of fluids and took Grimmjow's hand again, steadying it.
He then put some rubbing alcohol on a cotton ball and wiped the surface of the small bruise that had been created where the IV had been inserted. Grimmjow shivered as memories flew back into his mind.
Ichigo was just about to insert the needle when he suddenly jerked his arm free, holding it close against him.
"I... I don't want it." He decided, gulping down as he stared at the demonic needle in the teen's hands.
"It won't hurt." Ichigo cooed gently, putting his hand over his. "Besides, you have to take it if you wanna heal faster."
"The fluids are gonna hurt."
"Consider it like water. It's a very neutral composition."
"I'll drink water and get that done."
"It's not the same."
With a slightly rough movement, Ichigo jerked Grimmjow's arm down on the mattress to get a stable hold when inserting the needle. Grimmjow was just about to pull back again when Ulquiorra snickered.
"You're such a baby..."
"Oh shut up, Cifer, I bet you cried the second time Aizen-"
The two stopped reacting at the same time, Grimmjow seriously regretting his words and Ulquiorra frowning sadly.
He didn't even feel the prick on his skin as Ichigo reinserted the needle.
"S-Sorry... I-I didn't mean to..." the Sexta started, ignoring Ichigo for the moment.
"It's okay." Ulquiorra cut him off. "You were yelling things in your sleep again, so I figured you were having the Nightmare again anyways..." the Cuatra whispered as he put his empty bowl of soup down and hugged his knees. Grimmjow felt horrible as he noticed the IV in Ulquiorra's arm as well. How come the Cuatra took it so easily and he had so much trouble? Exactly how weak was he?
"Yes... I saw that time when you-"
"Shut up, Jaegerjaques. It's all history now. Just forget it." Ulquiorra turned to him and smiled lightly as an encouragement.
"Hey, you guys."
The two ex-Espada turned to Ichigo, who was holding up two bowls of steaming chicken noodle soup.
"I know I'm not a part of this conversation, but I did become a part of this team the moment I agreed to help you." He sighed. "And even if you won't tell me everything, I at least wanna know what you're talking about." He demanded.
"Oh, the Nightmare?" Grimmjow shrugged. "I can't always remember correctly. It's usually just memories from my experiences in Las Noches. I don't really know what happens, but I do know that I freaks me out cause I always wake up in cold sweat afterwards." He brushed it off with a simple lie, just like he was used to doing.
"I see." Ichigo nodded, then held out the two bowls of soup to each Arrancar. "Hungry?"
"Gladly." Grimmjow nodded.
"The world will never know..." Ulquiorra commented wryly as he grabbed a second serving.
"Thank you for the food." Grimmjow muttered.
"The world can never know..."
"How long have we been out anyway?" Grimmjow asked after a while as he devastated his fourteenth serving of soup.
"A week." Ichigo shrugged as he sipped some soup along with them, leaned back on a rolling chair he found in the clinic.
"A week!" Ulquiorra almost choked his soup out, genuinely surprised.
"Well, I'm surprised too. Dad said you two would be out like lights for at least two weeks, but here you are, alive and healthy in just half the time." He shrugged.
"A week is still a lot..." Ulquiorra noted worriedly.
"Yes, Aizen has had more than enough time to prepare himself to come after us."
"Ah, stop worrying so much about Aizen." Ichigo butted in. "We've informed Soul Society and they're keeping tight watch over him for any openings they could use to take him out."
"They should know it won't work that easily." Grimmjow commented wryly, holding out his bowl for another serving.
"It's better than nothing, I think. At least now we can keep tabs on his movements." The Shinigami shrugged.
There was a silence as Ichigo served Grimmjow his fifteenth serving, and the threesome ate in silence. Finally, Ulquiorra spoke up.
"Does... Does Soul Society know about... us?" he inquired nervously, a knot tying in his stomach.
"Not yet. We haven't told them. For all they know, all the Espada have been killed. We don't know what their reaction would be facing the truth, so we didn't want to take any risks, especially when you two were unconscious and unable to defend yourselves." The ten explained.
"Mhm..." Ulquiorra nodded as he handed his bowl out for his sixteenth serving.
"Didn't you two eat enough yet?" Ichigo sighed in desperation as he scraped the bottom of the pot for the last serving. "I bet Yuzu will complain if I make her prepare another pot for you two gluttons." He muttered to himself.
"We're hungry." The two Arrancar simply answered at the same time, slurping down what they realized would be their last servings of food.
The three teens ate in silence again until Ichigo stopped and thought for a while.
"Ulquiorra, you know, I've never seen you so... emotionally open before..." he noted, making Ulquiorra stop eating and look up at the ceiling.
"Ah, that. Well, it's because I feel obligated to wear masks." He simply answered, leaving Ichigo puzzled.
"All of us have to have a mask somewhere. You never know when you might need it to protect your heart." Grimmjow added, trying to make Ichigo understand.
The latter simply stared, then sighed.
"Forget I asked." He turned around, and for a moment, the Espada thought he hadn't gotten what they had told him. He proved them wrong by suddenly turning back around and smiling sweetly at them. "I knew what you meant, I just needed to make sure."
Grimmjow's heart sped up as he watched Ichigo's smile.
No fake smiles.
Finally.
Closing his eyes, he sipped his last drop of soup and put his bowl down, smiling down at his blankets in return.
He liked it here.
Author's Notes:
Now I feel like soup -.-" Oh wellz :/ OOC-NESS FOR THE WIN. But only in this chapter.
Kay, extremely dark and depressing chapter... Did anyone have a depression overdose? No? That's good! ^^
Okay, so here's my theory. All the Espada have created some kind of a mask for them to hide what they really feel from their enemies (yes, that includes Aizen, cause Aizen sucks D:) and each have their predetermined "personality" that they want the world to see. And they can only be themselves when they're away from the enemy's eyes. So Grimm and Ulqui are finally starting to drop their masks and open up. Cause seriously? No one would ever want to willingly obey Aizen. Cause Aizen's such an ass O_O"
Also, this chapter was a double text. If there is something you didn't understand, it's probably because you just read the words and didn't look for the actual meaning of the sentence. The first part of the chapter are the words. The second text is underlined. It's all the sentences that subtely stand out, and when put together, make another back backstory. Everything has a link, whether it be in the nightmare sequence or in the real world sequence. If you have nothing better to do and did not understand everything, go back and read. You'll be surprised how many sentences hint at other sentences in the chapter and together, reveal a part of the Espada's past.
Of course, I'm always open for questions.
So yeah... next chapter will be extremely light to compensate for all the brain cells that died in your head while reading this chapter. Our favourite Espada (well, my two fav Espada, anyway) will finally get a taste of the real world! (and tacos :3)
So yeah. I'm kinda disappointed cause I got one revew last chapter and like, 5720657258 favs O_O" (maybe not that much, but you get the point -.-"). I mean, it's not like the lack of reviews is because of the lack of readers, there are a bunch of fav-ers! So pleeeaassseee, would you be kind enough to leave a review? Just one word will do )': You don't need to write an essay, just whatever crosses your mind at that moment will do D:
Yep, yep. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go study... No wait, I have to go panic for my math exam tomorrow O_O" WISH ME LUCK~
Oh, and please review *chibi Grimmkitty makes puppy dog eyes* PLEASE? :3