Welcome to, Chaos On Deck Part X...
You know the spiel, I do not own Star Wars, Darth Vader, Emperor Palpatine, The Stormtroopers, the Death Star, these are all copyrights of LucasFilm Ltd. I also do not own any other references in the RP such as Beauty and the Beast, The Lion King, Hercules, Aladin, Monster's Inc., Lady and the Tramp, Cinderella, The Little Mermaid, Mulan, Mickey, Goofy, Voldemort, Sauron, A Christmas Carol, Fantasia, Brother Bear, Alice In Wonderland, Hunchback Of Notre Dame, and/or Elton John Songs. We also apologize to any movies, or trademarksa not listed here that are in the spoof and respectfully request that should you find one you notify others of it's presence and realize that it is the product of the company who owns it and not this is a spoof things are going to happen in extremely bizarre ways and totally different from the story line.
This spoof in particular is taken from a roleplay the people listed below and I did on Neopets, and is THE TEAL STAR CHRISTMAS SPECIAL!. Now on to the participators...
Marly_Hugo35 (Me) - Darth Vader, Sam the PA Guy, Various Disney Characters
bugsbunny7117 - Chef, The Emperor, Various Disney Characters
O.k., so guess what? Did you guess? O.k., this is THE TEAL STAR CHRISTMAS SPECIAL PART 2, this is it, The Ice Show, the set up for our AMAZINGLY NEW AND EXCITING STORY LINE, "In Disney We Trust!" So, be on the look out for that and enjoy the final chapter in Chaos On Deck. But definitely not the final chapter for this little ragtag group of Spoofers.
When last we left our could be heroes, The chef had revealed that this entire thing may be a Christmas special. In the horror that came from this revelation he threw his cookies in all general directions except for behind him, which is a quandary the tech team is still working on debunking. Now, is probably the best time to discuss a few things that happened after the cookies hit the fan, literally, but are not fully detailed in the rest of the story. First off, Bobbert and Chris were on catwalk 24-D when the incident occurred and saw the cookies fly in almost all directions. Bobbert, who had once lost his beloved ghost cookie to a very hungry Vader, jumped after two angel cookies in the hopes of saving them from the reactor(which they were headed straight for). However, Bobbert was never celebrated for his bravery as he misjudged the distance and ended up in the reactor, but more on what happened after he fell into the reactor later. As for Chris, he was celebrated not for saving cookies, but for saving Vader by jumping in the way of a Christmas Tree cookie and saving his Dark Lord's life, but ending his own. The rest of this story is dedicated to Chris, who boldly gave his life to save the Dark Lord who never cared.
"Christmas special?," Sam said as he looked up with puppy dog eyes, clutching a candy cane cookie in his hands. "The Supreme Beings never told you what would happen today..." "They told me enough, they told me you planned this!" "Yes Sam, I am the..." "NEXT CONTESTANT ONNNN THE EMPEROR IS ALWAYS MOSTLY RIGHT!" "O-M-G! I can not believe this, I mean, like when it first came out I was like...," Vader rambled on as he took off in a sprint towards the stage emerging from the far wall, "... I'M GONNA WIN THISSSSSSSSSSSSS... KATHUD, SCREECH, POOF!" "Never again Sam, never again," Vader whimpered as he looked up from behind the wrecked janitorial cart with a sponge feebly clinging to the Sith Lord's face as he fought to stand up, "WHY DO WE EVEN HAVE WINDEX? WE HAVE LIKE TWO WINDOWS!"
The Emperor laughed out loud, "Oh My Apprentice what am I going to do with you?," he said looking at the cart. "Hey isn't that janitor number six's?," he said with a tilt of his ancient head.
"I don't know SIR Emperor Von Evilstein!" "Really you've been knighted?..." "Shut up Sam! Your ruining my monologue," Vader said as he stepped up onto the stage and placed a hand on the podium. "What are you going to do?," he mocked, "Chain me to this podium? Shock me? FORCE ME TO COMPLY TO YOUR NIGHTMARISH IDEAL OF A GAME SHOW?" Suddenly his hands were chained to the podium and a small electric current was pulsing in his metal hands. "You know Sam? In hindsight, it probably wasn't a good ideal to chastise the closest thing our universe has to Lord Voldemort and Sauron," Vader said as Janitor 6 polished the railing of the catwalk, "But! We might as well play along whilst I can still stand on my mechanical legs." Janitor 6 then faded into nothingness as Sam stared wide-eyed at him.
The Emperor looked down at his hands for a moment, "I can electrocute people without even DOING anything now?" His grin took up his entire face and his eyes lit up like Christmas lights, "SWEET," he said hopping sideways into his throne. "Let the Games begin!"
"B-B-B-But, the ... and the ...," Sam stuttered as he handed the questions to the Emperor, "JANITOR 6 IS a Gh-Gh-Ghost!" "What Sam?" "He's a...," Sam started before he noticed the cart disappearing, "THE CART!" "Yes, Janitor 4 came and got the cart, now can we get on with this charade?" "B-B-But, the... I have got to stop having midnight Polar Express marathons with Chef."
The Emperor Stared at Sam, "What are you going on about? Stop it, you're going to freak people out. Pfft, Ghosts of Christmas, please! Don't tell me you believe in all that 'expect the first ghost when the bell tolls one' garbage, right?" He said, suddenly opening his eyes wider as a bell tolled in the background somewhere... "Hey did anyone else hear that?"
"I told you we'd be late!," a voice sounded from the main reactor as a bright light erupted from the reactor and a shadow was cast across the wall. "Hear what Master?," Vader said with a voice coated in sarcasm. "I DID!," Sam squealed from his position in the corner. "Oh shut up Sam, and stop being such a... buzzzzz!," Vader said as smoke floated off him.
The Emperor shuddered, and covered his eyes as the shadow covered the wall, "Who's there?, he called. "Vader! I don't want to look. Tell me who is? And what are they late for?," he said curling up in a small ball. As tough as he liked to seem, the Emperor was an unsalvageable coward at times.
"Why do I have to do it? Despite your cataracts you have decent eyesight...," Vader whined as another shadow flashed across the wall. "Please, I have never been late in my life..." "What about this little journey? What will you tell the Master when we are late returning, and on Christmas! The Master will not be pleased..." "Cogsworth, lighten up, what the Master does not know, can not hurt him."
The Emperor peaked between his fingers and relaxed visibly...in fact the tight little ball that was Palpatine suddenly and all at once melted into an exasperated sprawl. "Oh good grief...it's just you two, FOR HEAVEN'S SAKE I THOUGHT IT WAS LIKE SUPREME BEING MARLY here to haunt me or something!"
"What the Master does not know? Why you... Supreme Being Marly?," Cogsworth asked as he stepped onto the metal around the reactor. "What a silly fairy tale," Lumiere stated as he too stepped out of the main reactor and the glow ebbed away. "Well now that we've solved that mystery without the aid of meddling kids and stuttering dogs, we really should get back to..." Suddenly a loud gasp sounded from the reactor and a flash of purple erupted from it followed by tendrils of blue and black smoke. A loud hiss then filled the air as the tendrils folded in and formed the shape of a person. Suddenly, fire shot up the form and a blue man with blue and white flames for hair stood in it's place, "Memo to me, memo to me, maim them after my meeting."
The Emperor was supremely baffled at the appearance of these figures. He recognized the clock and candelabra, sure they made regular appearances. But this other man, with the flaming hair, and the impressive attitude, he was new. And how on earth had he gotten there? He tilted his head and turned a questioning look to his apprentice.
"Don't look at me, your the sinner here, if he's coming for anyone it's YOU!," Vader yelled as the chains poofed in a cloud of blue smoke and Vader took off in a sprint towards the Emperor and slid across a patch of ice and into the throne. The blue guy face palmed and then turned to face the Emperor, "Wow, you certainly are a little... Older… and fatter… and more senile than I expected..." "RUN! RUN!," Cogsworth shouted.
Taking Cogsworth's advice and indulging the natural cowardice in his soul the Emperor fled as fast as he could. Screaming all the way. "SUPREME BEINGS ABOVE WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE THIS!" A rather large list floated down and smacked him in the face. The bottom read, "Love you though and we still owe you a box of Twinkies ~the Supreme Beings."
Running after his master, Vader found himself instead running on the list like a treadmill whilst his Master disappeared and Sam cowered behind a large cut-out of Vader. Suddenly the cut-out's head burst into flames as the blue man snapped his fingers. Lumiere and Cogsworth were hiding behind the throne whilst Vader faceplanted into a mound of snow, "I HATE YOUR SINS MASTER!"
The Emperor continued running, "I HATE THEM TOO!" He wheeled around a corner, and suddenly skidded to a halt and turned around, "WHERE'S THE CHEF!"The Chef meanwhile was sitting quite contentedly and nonchalantly on the edge of the Emperor's bed with a mug of hot chocolate.
"THEN REPENT YOU IGNORANT FOOL! REPENT BEFORE WE HAVE TO HIRE A NEW P.A. GUY AND WE HAVE TO SCRAPE MELTED GOLD AND CANDLE WAX OFF THE FLOOR!," Vader yelled as Sam cried out in terror as the cut-out slowly burned towards the floor and Hades advanced towards Vader. "The Master will not be happy..." "The Master? What about the King? "What will he say when..." "Shut UP!"
The Emperor fell to his knees "I REPENT SUPREME BEINGS! I REPENT!" and this being done Supreme Being Bugs, or as they call her in Scandinavia, Cachu Cachu, got out a flashlight and I MEAN- a great light shone down from the heavens and from somewhere off camera there came a few angelic chords singing, "And that's the Gospel Truth...
"On The Teal Star, life was neat and smooth as sweet vermouth. Though, honey, it may seem imposs'ble, that's the gospel truth," came a voice from the reactor as dark tendrils of smoke shot out of it in all directions and grabbed onto the scruff of Hades' cloak, dragging him back as his hair disappeared in a puff. "Woah, woah, Is my hair out?" Suddenly everything went quiet as Hades disappeared.
The Chef finished his hot chocolate, and watched as the Emperor poked his newly repented head back into the throne room. "Vader?," asked the ancient being, "What WAS that?," he asked walking slowly back into his throne room and almost daring to pear down into the reactor... almost, he skittered away at the last second.
"I'fkad Surdjosdj," Vader mumbled as he heaved himself out of the snow drift and stared at his master with snow falling from the mouth of his mask, "I think it was..." "Hades, the Un-Official Ghost of Christmas Future, The King sent us to..." "King? Who said anything about there being a King? It was you wasn't it?," Cogsworth said interrupting Lumiere's story. "Sam, are you all right?" "YELP!," The P.A. Guy cried from behind the smoldering shoes of the cut-out.
"Hades You mean?... But... but wait a second, If... if those two are past and present and Hades was future then... Who was MARLY?" Another note floated down from heaven on it written only one word. "Duh." The Emperor scratched his head for a moment, "Vader I don't get it. Duh?"The Chef got up and helped Vader from his drift and coaxed Sam from behind the cut-out's ruins. "Are you two Ok?"
"Perhasp, ti measn... Yeah I have no idea... maybe Marly's the King," Vader ventured as he knocked some snow off his shoulder, "And I'm fine Chef." Suddenly a pop sounded above him and a letter floated down in to his hand, "Your Getting Warmer... The Supreme Beings." "Well, now you got me stumped!" "I'm perfectly fine Chef. Nothing that a few week with Dr. Fraggletail down in therapy won't help."
The Emperor looked to the Sky, "Guys I need another hint!" Another note floated down from the sky "our apologies on the tardiness." The Emperor looked to Vader again, bewildered beyond words for the umpteenth time that day.
"Well that's slightly counter productive," Vader said as he tore the paper from the Emperor's hands and shook it angrily at the ceiling, "Is this your idea of a joke?" Suddenly a piece of paper floated down and landed on Vader's helmet. Removing it he read aloud, "Dearest Vader, do not make us use the lightning again, we'll up the voltage this time. P.S. - Questions will be answered in time."
Palpatine shrugged "I'd listen Vader, Remember the last time?" He couldn't help but wonder who WAS Marly though. well. Jacob Marly at least. He'd seen Supreme Being Marly. He was nice enough. A little goofy, then again, at least he didn't hang around with a Crazy person in four different colors like Supreme Being Bugs...
"We'll either way the reveal should be a truly 'en-lightning' experience," Vader smirked as a small note floated down that read, "HA!" "I think they find it funny..." "Don't get conceited Jerome thought that too, he's not with us anymore, but..." "GWARSH!" "So help me, if the next person out of that reactor is Goofy, I will storm him like a teenage girl meeting Justin Bieber," Vader said flatly.
Palpatine looked at the rea- Wait... He turned to Vader and stared. He started to speak a few times but he never quite succeeded. Finally he managed something articulate, "Why...And of all the comparison's to make...Vader why?"
"I thought it was the most accurate for the amount of excitement I will feel if the next person out of that reactor is Goofy dressed like Jacob Marly," Vader said as another, "Gwarsh," sounded and a flash of purple filled the room as a piggy bank with a chain attached landed on the grate around the reactor.
Palpatine shook his head, not quite comprehending why his apprentice would be so excited to see Goofy in a Jacob Marly costume...it wasn't like it was Simba or anything. Now Simba, Simba is awesome, if he ever saw Simba he'd scream like a little Chef was listening to this conversation, knowing that the Emperor liked Simba, and was rather feeling that it might be interesting to meet some of the human characters, that he might have an intellectual exchange of logical- Oh who was he kidding he'd do anything to serve Spaghetti to the Tramp
"Gwarsh!," came the cry again before Goofy fell, rather unceremoniously, from the reactor in a heap of chains, and safety deposit boxes, and piggy banks, and one metal plated Emperor chibi, "Steven Palpatine, tonight, gwarsh, you will, be um... gwarsh, um... visited by three spirits!" "Excuse me mon ami, but I believe you have arrived a trifle bit late to the party," Lumiere said as he hopped up. "I KNEW IT!," Vader squealed as Goofy stumbled across to them, he was more excited then a female teenager in line to get Taylor Lautner's autograph at a Twilight Convention. Sam stood staring at the reactor, "So help me, if the next person out of that reactor is Mickey, or Donald, then I might just die," he muttered as various Disney scenes flashed across the purple glow.
The Emperor was beginning to wonder what was going on, but the fact could not be changed and so he wandered over instead, "Ok, So why am I being haunted by three spirits? And who sent you? Was it the Supreme Beings? Did they send you with a box of Twinkies by any chance?," he said beginning to drool...maybe...a tiny bit. He might be a bit of a Twinkie addict...but he wasn't about to admit.
"You are being haunted... because the... Gwarsh! King thought you were a little to..." "Arrogant?" "Conceited?" "Mind-numbingly evil?" "Uh, well, uh... NO. Mean," Goofy said as Sam and Vader deflated at their suggestions being wrong, "And, um, well there's um, some Twinkies in the piggy bank." Vader's jaw dropped as he stooped down to look at the incredibly small piggy bank in question.
The Emperor shrugged, "Pfft, yeah I know, Oh well," he said completely devoid of any care for said subject, Sith Lords were mean, fact of life, but more importantly he was completely at a loss for any knowledge of the king, and therefore was stupidly apathetic on the mater. Meanwhile he was staring at this piggy back wondering how on earth he was going to get his beloved Twinkies out.
"Well Sam, break out the Twinkie Freeing Device," Vader said as a small note made out of three circles that kind of looked like Mickey Mouse's head floated down and he read it, "The King wants to see you." "As you wish," Sam said as he took out a large sledgehammer. "Thanks Sam," Vader said tossing the note to the Emperor.
The Emperor threw up his hands, "WAIT! You'll crush my Twinkies!," he cried diving to the ground and hugging the piggy bank protectively. He suddenly saw the note and read it. Shrugged, and stuffed it into the pocket of his robe figuring that he would deal with it later. OR not, depending on his mood. Of course he could have no idea of what was to come...well he could have used his force foresight I suppose, but the fact of the matter was he was not so secretly one of the laziest bums in the galaxy.
"Oh, of course, how could I have forgotten about the poor innocent Twinkies...," Vader said before a thunder clap sounded and another note floated down. "We will not harm the innocent, but should you do so, you might not wake up alive...," he read aloud as he tore the mallet from Sam's hands and tossed it into the dismal abyss of the reactor. "HOW DARE YOU SAM!," Vader exclaimed as Sam looked up at him deflated. "It's o.k. Sam, we'll just have to use another device to get to them." "And what of the King?," Lumiere asked as he inspected the piggy bank. "King Sming, he can wait, we have Twinkies to free from their porky captor," Vader said waving Lumiere off, "Don't worry Twinkies, we'll save you!"
The Chef came over with a tiny hammer, and wordlessly began inspecting the piggy bank. He turned it upside down, and looked at it front ways and back ways, and sideways, and slant ways, and any other ways you can think of, and then, tapped it with his tiny hammer, finally setting it on the ground and contenting himself to watch."Da' heck was that?," blurted the Emperor.
"Ssh," Vader said as he put a finger to his mouth and stared intently at the piggy bank as Goofy swayed back and forth on his overly large shoes. "But master!," Sam whined before a hand met his face and he tumbled backwards into Vader's toy red wagon. "Silence, I keel you!," Vader said as the piggy bank shattered suddenly and a pile of Twinkies up to his thigh poured out.
The Emperor stared...and also drooled, then shook his head, "...It's bigger on the inside? Hey it's sort of like that British sho-"Careful," interrupted the Chef, "that's one heck of a crossover...with lots of running…"The Emperor, perturbed at the thought of more running than he was even put through here, was soon preoccupied with engorging himself on the mound of Twinkies.
"Well, now that that minor episode is over, if the ghosts of Christmas would please depart to the land from which they came, we would like to present the festivities tonight," Vader said as the three ghosts disappeared into the reactor and he took his seat on a nice little throne beside his master's, "Hurry up master or you won't get a good seat!," he called as Stormtroopers filed into the room.
Palpatine rushed to his seat, excitedly clapping his hands, "Oh boy" he said like an excited child at a Bieber Chef skated by on his way to his own seat
With a snap of his fingers two cables flew down from the ceiling and lifted the red wagon up into his spot in the announcer's box. "Good evening folks, I'm Sam The P.A. Guy and this is the first annual Teal Star Escapades, we ask that all cellphones and... RING! RING! Vader? Why are you calling me on my cellphone? HANG UP! Click!" "Thank you and enjoy the show," he finished as the lights died.
The Emperor snuggled down into his seat and munched happily on some popcorn while the lights dimmed. When the entire room was dark, a single spotlight shown down and two troopers entered it, one in a Prince costume, and the other in a long blond wig and a pink dress. The "girl" began as the music started. "I know you. I walked with you, once upon a dream..."
Applause broke out as the spotlight went out and the sound of a prop being moved filled the air. "I can show you the world, shinning, shimmering, splendid, tell me princess, now when did you last let your heart decide...," sang a stormtrooper as the spotlight lit up a cut out of the Agrabah Palace and a magic carpet flew out from behind it with two stormtroopers on it.
Back on the other side of the rink another pair took the spotlight, sitting on a bench surrounded by some plastic flower bushes as a cutout of Cinderella's castle was illuminated in a soft pink. "So this is love, Mmm hmm… Mmm hmmm… SO this is love..."
"I can open your eyes. Take you wonder by wonder. Over, sideways and under,on a magic carpet ride. A whole new world. A new fantastic point of viewNo one to tell us no, or where to go, or say we're only dreaming...," sang the troopers on the carpet as it zipped around the throne room. The reactor glowed a soft pink and purple as it pulsed to the music. "I think we have a Code 34," said Vader.
The Emperor snuck a look from the rink quickly to his apprentice, "What's a code thirty four?"
Suddenly the music changed and the Chef leaped out into the rink, a team of cooks standing in ranks before him. "LETS get down to business, To cook, some buns"
"A cold thirty four is..." "AHHHHHHHH!," sang a stormtrooper in a loin cloth as he swung from vine to vine on a large tree, "Two worlds one family, trust your heart, let fate decide, to guide these, to guide these lives we see..." "A CODE THIRTY FOUR, IS A POTENTIAL TAMPERING OF THE REACTOR ALLOWING IT TO BECOME A PORTAL TO SOME OTHER DIMENSION!," Vader tried to yell over the din of the show.
The Emperor, poor old coot that he was, could only shout back, "Who got detention?"Two troopers in dog costumes trotted out into the rink as the chorus began to sing, "Oh this is the night. It's a beautiful night and they call it bella notte..."
"No, the I left the egg beaters in the KITCHEN!," Vader yelled back as columns were brought out and five stormtrooper statues were placed as another stormtrooper walked out in a purple dress, "If there's a prize for a rotten judgment, I guess I've already won that, no man is worth the aggravation. That's ancient history, been there done that." "Whod'ya think you kidding, he's the Earth and heaven to you, trying to keep hidden, honey we can see right through ya, girl you can't conceal it, we know how ya feel and who your thinking of..." "No chance, no way, I won't say it no, no..." "You swoon sigh, why deny it oh, oh." It's too cliché, I won't say I'm in love."
Suddenly all spotlights were on a stormtrooper in center rink, wearing a yellow jumpsuit and a coifed wig on his head. "Some people settle for the typical things,Livin' all their lives waiting in the wings...
"It ain't a question of 'if'', just a matter of time. Before I move to the front of the line. Once you're watching every move that I make, you gotta believe that I got what it takes," the yellow jumpsuit man sang before the lines attached to him made him fly up towards the ceiling, "To stand out," sparks exploded from the exhaust pipes below, "above the crowd. Even if I gotta shout out loud. Till mine is the only face you'll see. Gonna stand out... 'Til ya notice me." The man was then swirled around the room, high-fiving every trooper in the catwalk seating. "OMG! This is more exciting then meeting Elton John," Vader exclaimed before a pencil hit him in the head and he turned to see Elton whistling nonchalantly, "Sorry Elton."
Four more troopers in dog costumes skidded onto the scene with Billy Joel in their midst! "Why Should I worry? (Tell me) Why should I care…"The Emperor practically jumped out of his seat, "HOW did we afford him! And who cast this because I need to hug them!" He declared in the utmost seriousness.
"No, I can't play the accordion," Vader replied as a rock was rolled out with a stormtrooper in a fish tail and long red hair sitting on it. "Look at this stuff, isn't it neat? Wouldn't you think my collection's complete? Wouldn't you think I'm the girl... the girl who has... everything? Look at this trove, treasures untold, how many wonders can one cavern hold?..."
Troopers on all sizes came bolting out now in bear costumes, "Welcome to our Family time! Welcome to our Happy To Be Time!"The Emperor turned back to His Apprentice and shouted, "What about Door Ten? I thought they fixed that LAST week!"
"No, I'm not gonna turn the other cheek, I can't believe you wanted to end me!," Vader said as the bears were ushered off and two stormtroopers walked in wearing monster costume. "Put that thing back where it came from or so help me, so help me... and cut," the one dressed as a one eyed green monster sang as the big blue one beat-boxed behind him before they rushed off.
Two storm troopers rushed in in an ANCIENT spaceman costume, and a cowboy costume, arm in arm as they sang, "You got a friend in me! You got a friend in me! When the road looks, rough ahead and you're miles and miles from your nice warm bed…"Obviously not comprehending a word of Vader's message the Emperor simply shrugged it off.
Don't you shrug at me!," Vader yelled back as a blue fish swam across the stage followed by a clown fish. "Just keep swimming, swimming, swimming. WHAT DO WE DO, we swim, swim, swim," the blue fish sung as they swam off stage. Suddenly a bird flew out of the reactor, "SQUAWK!" "Well that's new," Vader said as he turned his attention back to center ice.
The Emperor tilted his head as the lights dimmed, "What was that?"Suddenly all was dark and still, and there was a sense of /What went wrong?/ in the air. Then from seemingly nowhere, a great orange light burst forth from the reactor as a voice sang out loud.
"Nants ingonyama bagithi Baba, Sithi uhm ingonyama, Nants ingonyama bagithi baba, Sithi uhhmm ingonyama. Ingonyama. Siyo Nqoba, Ingonyama, Ingonyama nengw' enamabala," chanted the voices as out of the main reactor rose a giant rock as animals of all varieties made their way out of the glow. "From the day we arrive on the planet, and blinking step into the sun. There's more to be seen, then can ever be seen. More to do then can ever be done. There's far too much to take in here, more to find, then can ever be found. But the sun rolling high, through the sapphire sky, keeps great and small on the endless round." Suddenly a baboon raised a lion cub up over the crowd of animal from high above the rock, "IT'S THE CIRCLE OF LIFE, And it moves us all, through despair, and hope, through faith and love. Till we find our place. On the path unwinding. In the Circle, The Circle of Life," sang the voice as Elton John played on the piano
The Emperor turned to Vader with a look of half wonderment half bewilderment and half terror...did I mention he had excellent mathematic skills? "Vader...What did you say a code thirty four was again?"
"A-A-A c-c-code thir-thirty four, is a um, tampering with the reactor, causing a portal to be created into a new dimension," Vader stuttered as he watched the animals disappear back into the reactor and the rock slowly disappear. "Painting the roses red, we're painting the roses red," sang voices as several rose bushes shot out of the reactor and landed before a group of cards walked out with paint cans, "We dare not stop, or waste a drop, so let the be spread! We're paint the roses red! We're painting the roses red!"
The Emperor blinked at the card men in wonder, "Whoaahhhh…" Suddenly a Chinese man flipped out of the reactor and, seeing the troopers and identifying them as soldiers pointed at them and shouted, "You men! Let's get down to business, to defeat… The Huns!" The Chef stared amazed. This was the real deal! And no matter how hard he ran his kitchen, this man made him look like a pillow.
"The seaweed is always greener, in somebody else's lake," sang a Jamaican voice as a clear barrier appeared around most of the rink and it filled with water and sea-creatures, "You dream about going up there, but that is a big mistake. Just look at the world around you, right here on the ocean floor. Such wonderful things surround you, what more are you waiting for?" Suddenly the singer, a small red crab, jumped p onto a rock and sang on, "UNDER THE SEA!" "Under the sea!" "Under The sea!" "Under the sea!" "Darling it's better, down where it's wetter. Take it from me. Up on the shore they work all day. Out in the sun they slave away. While we devotin' Full time to floatin'. Under the sea!"
The water quickly drained and there was silence for but a moment. Then there was the small noise of gentle chanting...it almost sounded like...monks. Suddenly there was a bright light and the sound of large bells and a large dramatic choir as a large church rose slowly out of the reactor. When the choir had slowly died away there came the soft noise of an accordion, (Evidently not from Vader) and a small cart appeared. Then a strange voice began, "Morning in Paris. The city awakes. To the bells of Notre Dame. The Fisherman fishes. The bakerman bakes. To the bells of Notre Dame. To the big bells as loud as the thunder. To the little bells soft as a Psalm. And some say the soul of the city's the toll of the bells." Again the bells sounded in the background, "The Bells of Notre Dame"
The church then disappeared back into the reactor as the cart was dragged back into the depths. "I know that your powers of retention, are as wet as a warthog's backside," sang a light brown lion with a black mane and a scar on his eye padded out of the reactor followed by hyenas and green geysers spurting from the ground, But thick as you are... PAY ATTENTION! My words are a matter of pride. It's clear from your vacant expressions the lights are not all on upstairs, but we're talking kings and successions. EVEN YOU, CAN'T BE CAUGHT UNAWARES! So prepare for the chance of a lifetime. Be prepared for sensational news. A shiny new era, is tiptoeing nearer..." "And where do we feature?" "Just listen to teacher. I know it sounds sordid, but you'll be rewarded when at last I am given my dues," sang the lion as he jumped up onto a rock, "And injustice deliciously squared. BE PREPARED!" Suddenly Vader broke out into applause, "I LIKE THIS GUY! Who is he? Is that TK-5692? I knew it, look at the quality of that mane..." "ROAR!" "Never mind."
When the hyenas went away a small puppet came out of the reactor, "I've got no strings and now I'm free. There ain't no strings on me!" Suddenly the same man who'd been singing before did a front flip out of the reactor with a marionette handle in his hand, "Yeah sorry about that kid."The Emperor tilted his head, "Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, how did he get BACK!"
Presently he let go of the puppet and began rushing around and causing as much befuddlement and catastrophe as humanly possible. "Once a year we throw a party here in town! Once a year we turn the Teal Star upside down!" He rushed over and grabbed the Emperor and Vader, pulling them into the ring, "Every Man's the Emporer and he's a clown!" He strapped a clown hat roughly to the Emperor's head, "Once again we're at the Escapades!"
"CLOPIN!," a voice, much like, in fact nearly the same, minus the mechanical breathing, Vader's sounded from the reactor as a large lion stepped out, "What has the King told you about messing with the mortal's?" "WHY DO YOU HAVE MY VOICE? AND WHAT DO YOU MEAN MORTALS? AND WHY IS THERE BLUE TOUCAN ON MY SHOULDER?," Vader exclaimed as Zazu fluttered to the ground, in a heap, the product of Vader's frantic arm waving. "Sire? In the future, can you inform these Mongols the King is coming?," Zazu said to the lion as he pulled himself up. "Yes Zazu, I will tell him then," The Lion said as he stepped over the bird and looked up at the Emperor, "The King will be arriving shortly, he has very important business to discuss."
Copin's head dropped, "Oh Come now, I wasn't doing any harm! Just having a bit of fun that's all." The Emperor tilted his head and then looked to Vader, "Sweet animatronics huh?" Poor fool. He jumped back to his seat, knocking off his clown hat when he jumped in, looking at it strangely, then deciding to keep it. Clopin looked at the lion, "How does he still not get this?"
"He has chosen not to believe, we can not deny him the pleasures of believe we do not exist," Mufasa said as he stared at Vader, "The King will not be pleased with him when he arrives. Come Clopin, the others will want to join and we can't keep them waiting." He then turned and walked into the glow of the reactor. "I don't think they're animatronics," Vader said as he took his seat.
The Emperor looked at him skeptically, "Pffft! Please? How ELSE is it going to happen that A. It can talk. AND! B. It has YOUR voice?" He chuckled and turned back to the snorted and followed the lion casting a glance over his shoulder, "Just know this, you've been warned" he turned back to Mufassa and muttered under his breath, "What a bozzo."
The lion nodded as he disappeared followed by a large spire that shot out of the reactor with a mouse in a red sorcerer's robe and a blue sorcerer's hat atop it. Waving his hands the music started to play as brooms walked out of the reactor carrying buckets of water which they threw on the Emperor. Suddenly the janitor's closet door flew open and the items inside joined in the assault of the Emperor.
The Emperor cringed at the water, "HEY!" He turned angrily to his apprentice as they continued, "VADER!" The assault continued until some brash music began to play...music they'd heard MANY times before...
Suddenly a large table shot out of the reactor and landed before the spire as a candelabra jumped onto it and began to sing, "Be. Our. Guest. Be our guest, put our service to the test. Tie your napkin round your neck chere' and we provide the rest. Soup Du Jour, Hot hors d'oeuvres. Why, we only live to serve. Try the gray stuff, it's delicious, don't believe me ask the dishes. They can sing they can dance. After all miss this is France, and dinner is here is never second best. Go on unfold your menu, take a glance, and then you'll be our guest, oui our guest, be our guest..." "Thank you Lumiere," the mouse said as he jumped onto the table, waved his hands, and the brooms fell lifeless, "Emperor! I am King Mickey, I believe you were informed of my arrival?"
The Emperor however was not to be found in his chair. No, he was to be found crouched behind it and trying to pull his head as low over his face as it would stretch. He wasn't a fan of being wrong, and on such a scale it sort of... kind of terrified him. The Chef, Grabbed him by the scruff and dragged him out. "Looking for this?" Palpatine acted as though he were still behind the chair.
"Emperor! I have come from a world totally apart from yours to discuss the discovery of the reactor's powers," Mickey said as he tossed the hat aside and threw the robes away to reveal a black, double-zippered cloak. "THE KING!," Vader exclaimed as he bowed, "I gravel at your feet." "It's grovel, not gravel you dunce," Sam announced over the P.A. as troopers fled the room in terror.
Now that the Chef had the Emperor up. He was about to ask how come Vader never groveled at HIS feet, when a small note drifted down from the heavens, "Don't do it you idiot." The message having been received, he stood up, obviously not being able to ignore the problem any further, and tried to put on his most dignified face... the previous cowering sort of ruined the effect, but he tried nonetheless. "Greetings your Majesty," he said looking down at the mouse king, "What is this power of the reactor that you're talking about?"
"Greetings, sad pathetic man," Mickey said as Vader stood up, "The reactor has created a portal between your dimension and mine. For months now, a small rift had been formed through which Lumiere and Cogsworth came, but now your scientist has torn the threads that bind the rift and allowed us to pass freely through." "I knew that ignorant scientist had something to do with this," Vader exclaimed.
The Emperor tilted his head, oh THAT'S how freaky jester man got back...Someone needs to keep him on a leash or something...he thought for a moment /Barnabus would like him.../ The continued that train of thought and shuddered /Oh the destruction.../ The Emperor blinked and looked back to the Mouse King, "Alright... So... is this a good thing or a bad thing? ...It makes for one heck of an Ice show..."
"It is undetermined, what could happen. I came to request that the portal be left open, for the time being, until it's effects can truly be studied, I'll send my scientist tomorrow to experiment, until then, you have my good wishes," King Mickey replied. "Steven, the implications of this portal could stretch far beyond the Ice Show, they could aid Wilkins exponentially," Vader responded.
The Emperor nodded at the Wilkins comment, there was no denying that idea. He then nodded to the king, "Alright, but I have a few conditions. Firstly, I don't want people coming over here without your consent for their doings. Secondly, that loony we had in here earlier doesn't come in without a leash or a harness and a handler. Thirdly... can we come explore some of your worlds?," he said with a huge pleading grin…, "They err… they look kind of fun."
"You are more then welcome to a few of our worlds, but there are three that you may not enter," Mickey said as the spire disappeared behind him, "The World That Never Was, Halloweentown, and Port Royal, are too... wild as it is for you to go exploring. Other then that I agree to your conditions and offer you a visit to Disney Castle." The eyes of Vader's mask grew three times larger at the thought.
The Emperor jumped up and down, "Can we go right now!" The Chef was about to say that he wasn't sure that was a good idea, but at the sight of Vader's expression kept silent. "Oh wait a second, guys what about Fragglehorn?"
"! CRASH! BANG! THUD! BOOM!," screamed a... man in a Teal Star costume? as he shot out of the reactor and around the room before Vader stopped him and held him high above the reactor with the force. "When you wish, upon a Death Star, makes no difference where your from, your planet will explode, just like. A. Bomb!," the man inside the costume sang before Vader let him drop into the reactor with a, "Poof!"
The Emperor jumped nearly out of his ugly wrinkled skin. It was clear there was only one thing left to do. The chase was on. And so we leave our villains with a kinder side to their chase and as we sit back and enjoy our view The Supreme Beings have but one message for you. Wherever you are, and whatever you do, Merry Christmas to all and may the force be with you.
And so we end the Chaos On Deck: Christmas Special as well as Chaos On Deck, but not the story of these could-be heroes.
But I'm sure you still have questions like:
What will happen next?
Will there be more Disney allusions and cameos?
What has happened to Dr. Fragglehorn?
What about Barney and Wilkins?
Will the new story be awesome?
The answers to these questions and more will be found in "In Disney We Trust!" when it comes out soon...
In the meantime, rate, comment, review...