The number of people who have put this story on alert/favorite is literally blowing my mind. Brain pieces are scattered across my desk. Okay, not really, but it is totally amazing! Thank you guys so much! This is so cool! There are more than 30 people who have it alerted (or have had at some point...). Love to all of you! 3
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CHAPTER 6: A VISIT
Gaius woke Morgana the next morning. She shook her head, confused. "Where am I?" she asked blearily, sitting up. Then she remembered. "Oh."
"Gwen is here. She's been looking for you." She swung her legs out of the bed, then realized she was still holding the book. "I see you've found Merlin's book," Gaius said, reaching out for it. "It might be best if I keep that for you, at least for now."
She relinquished it to him reluctantly. "I would like to read it, if I could."
"Yes, you may have it," Gaius said. "I will bring it to you later today."
"Thank you."
"Best not keep Gwen waiting." The physician gave her a small, supportive smile.
"Yes," she responded a little absentmindedly. Morgana stood up and went down into the main room, to where her maid was waiting for her in a state of slight agitation.
"Lady Morgana, I was so worried when I couldn't find you this morning," she said, reaching for her. "Arthur said you'd come here after dinner, so I came to ask Gaius. I'm so glad that I found you."
"Sorry to worry you," Morgana replied, taking Gwen's hand and squeezing it.
They left Gaius's apartment and returned to Morgana's, ignoring the strange looks they got over the lady's slightly disheveled appearance. When they got back to her room, Gwen brushed out Morgana's hair and helped her redress. "Thank you," Morgana said when she was finished. "That will be all."
"Are you sure you're okay?" Gwen said in concern, her eyes searching Morgana's impassive face.
"Gwen, I have something to tell you," she said impulsively, drawing her friend down to sit beside her on the edge of her bed. She took a deep, fortifying breath before saying suddenly, "I'm pregnant."
"Really?" She sounded happy rather than shocked. "Merlin's?"
"Yes. But Uther mustn't know."
"Of course," Gwen said, looking at Morgana's blue-clad stomach. "How long have you known?"
"About a week and a half."
"What are you going to do about it?"
Morgana took a deep breath, spreading her fingers across the satin. "I'm keeping it. And I'm leaving Camelot. I cannot stay here, with what Uther has done."
"I understand." Gwen pulled Morgana into a hug. "I will do whatever I can to help you. Do you know where you will go?"
"I think I will return to my father's castle."
Gwen pulled away and stood up. "I have work to do. If you need anything, though, I will be here for you. Thank you for confiding in me, my lady."
Morgana smiled. "Go. Thank you for listening." The door clicked shut behind Gwen, and Morgana lay back on her bedcovers, fingers still on her stomach. "I will avenge you, Merlin, before I leave," she vowed to the ceiling. "Upon the life within me, I will avenge your death."
She stood and moved to her desk, tapping the metal tip of her quill against the wood as she thought, pulling a fresh sheet of paper towards her.
Three hours later, she had the basic outline of her plan for both revenge and escape. She was startled out of her reverie by a sharp tapping at her door. "One moment!" she called, hastily covering the paper with another one and drying the quill. When she opened the door, she found Arthur standing there.
"Would you like to go riding with me after lunch?" he asked, suave as ever.
She smiled. "Of course. What time is it?"
The prince smiled back. "Time for lunch. Would you like to eat with me?"
I must keep up the façade, she told herself severely, though the part of her that blamed Arthur was crying out for her to shut him down and refuse. "Of course," she said instead, following him out of the room.
Lunch was uneventful; it was only when they'd left the courtyard on their horses did things get more interesting. Arthur took a turn down a side road, leading out of the city by a route that Morgana didn't recognize. "Where are we going?" she called, urging her horse forward to walk beside his.
He looked over at her, sadness etched in his face. "I thought you might want to see Merlin's grave. You missed the funeral when you were locked in your room."
Morgana was speechless. She had totally forgotten the fact that Merlin would have been buried, would have a grave somewhere. What shocked her more was that Arthur was going to take her there. She was certain that Uther had forbidden him to go there himself, much less take Morgana. She could feel her pent-up anger with the Pendragon prince fade a little, but not entire dissipate.
They clattered through the small gates to the city onto a narrow dirt path leading into the forest. "Are you sure this is the right way?" she asked Arthur, a little anxiously.
"Yes. I come here almost every day," was his surprising reply. They passed through the woods in silence after that, coming soon to a medium-sized clearing. Graves were lined up along the grassy floor, their headstones ranging from ancient and worn to new and shiny. Some were obviously well-frequented and had flowers lying on the grass before the stones.
Arthur dismounted, followed by Morgana. He led her through the rows to a new stone, starkly white against the bright green of the grass that surrounded it. The viridescent blades growing over the small mound were thin and new, just struggling up from the earth. For a moment they stood there, saying nothing. Morgana dropped to her knees, throwing aside any thoughts she might have had for her clothes. Her dark blue velvet cloak puddled around her, like a pool of sorrow and tears.
"Could you give me a moment?" she asked the prince, her voice trembling slightly.
"Of course." Arthur backed off and began to stroll the stones, keeping a watchful eye on the girl.
Morgana dug her fingers into the soft earth, tears pooling in her eyes and running down her porcelain-pale cheeks. Her mind finally took in the letters carved into the snow colored rock.
MERLIN
BELOVED SON
LOYAL FRIEND
MAY YOU REST IN PEACE
She broke into wracking sobs, her whole body shaking with the force of her grief. She didn't know how long she knelt there, overcome by sorrow. Finally, she took a deep shuddering breath and regained control of herself. "Merlin," she whispered to the air. "I don't know how I can go on without you. You were everything to me." For another couple of seconds she was silent. "Guess what?" she asked, as though he were there and could hear her. "You're going to be a father!" Her enthusiasm felt forced. "So I guess I do have something to live for. I just wish you could be here too."
Morgana had much more to say, but before she could, Arthur came up behind her and put a hand on her shoulder. "I need to speak to you." The seriousness in his voice caught Morgana's attention.
"What about?"
Arthur looked, for the first time in her experience, nervous. "I really am sorry about what happened to Merlin. Believe me, if I could have done anything, I would have. You may never forgive me, and I will understand, but you are not alone in your pain."
She looked at him coldly. "You are right. I may never forgive you, but I doubt that you feel the pain that I feel."
Arthur bent his head in acknowledgement, but hurt was evident in his blue eyes at her rejection of his support and camaraderie. "We need to be heading back to Camelot," he said gently, before stepping away again. He tried not to begrudge Morgana her feelings. He probably would have felt the same in her position.
Morgana pulled out her handkerchief and dabbed at her eyes before standing up. "Goodbye Merlin," she said. "I love you."
As they rode out of the cemetery, she looked back, her eyes picking out Merlin's grave. For a second it seemed that it wasn't as long as Merlin had been tall, but she shook the thought from her head. It would be years before she ever returned there.
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When she returned to her chambers, there was a folded note on her desk, atop the stack of other papers. She slid it into her palm and opened it quickly, before Gwen could see and question it.
UNDER THE BED
She quickly refolded it and slipped it into her sleeve, then looked under the bed. The book was pushed against the wall, wrapped in the piece of cloth and almost invisible in the dark. Morgana pulled it out from its dusty hiding spot and unwrapped it again. The book was heavier than she remembered as she laid it on the desk and opened it, searching for the spell she wanted.
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So here is the sad truth – there is only one more chapter left. T.T Well, plus an epilogue. But stay tuned! I love getting the alerts/favorites/reviews, so please keep it up!