AN: Sorry if it feels like they're moving like a roller-coaster. That's kinda how crazy-weird it's SUPPOSED to feel.

Chapter Five: I Could

They headed towards Nest Hardings by traveler train. There were four people to a compartment, conveniently, and two bunk beds built into the sides. Nessa was on the bottom of one, Nanny the top; Elphaba was on the bottom of the other, Fiyero the top. It was a long and boring four-day ride.

One night, Fiyero woke up to crying. It was Nessarose. Nanny had already gotten up and was consoling the girl, and Elphaba sat up staring out the window nearest her bed. Fiyero climbed down and joined her. "What's going on?"

"Another of her bad dreams. She has them once a week or so. She's had them since she was little. Something about a tornado. Is it bothering you?"

"No. It just alarmed me, that's all. Can't you sleep through it? After all, you said she's been doing it for years. You must be used to it."

"Of course. I'm just… I don't feel much like sleeping. It's been so boring during the days that I've done enough of that and I'm no longer tired."

He put his arm around her and sighed. "I know the feeling."

"We'll be there tomorrow." She said, reminding herself and him.

"I know."

There was a long pause as they looked at one another, and then they were kissing, long, deep and lovingly. Fiyero found there was something almost desperate in the way she kissed him, in the way she tugged at him. Together they leaned back on her bed, quiet but passionate. He slid a hand up her nightdress and cupped her breast. She didn't fight him. After ten minutes, Nanny got up to use the bathroom and Nessa's sniffling had died down. They curled up in the bed as he pulled his hand away and pulled her close instead. "We're lucky they didn't notice." Elphaba commented.

"We are, aren't we?" Fiyero agreed. He closed his eyes.

"Fiyero, go back to your bed." Elphaba said.

"Why?"

"Because we shouldn't do this. I know it's just sleeping, but we really shouldn't. Besides, what if Nanny notices when she comes back?"

He got up reluctantly and scrambled back up to his bunk. "Goodnight, Elphaba."

"Night."

"I love you."

Elphaba bit her lip and could not respond. She wrapped the blanket around her tighter. It was very late at night and Fiyero had long been asleep when she finally said, "I think I could love you, too."

Fiyero gave Elphaba a look as the door opened. She tried to smile at him, to comfort him, but it was strained. He knew she wasn't exactly happy with her family. But he wasn't given time to think about that as the door opened and Frex stood there, looking them all over.

"Good afternoon." Frex said, moving out of the doorway so everyone could enter. His eyes settled then on Fiyero. "Prince Fiyero, right?"

Fiyero nodded.

"Welcome." He shook Fiyero's hand graciously. "I hope it wasn't too much trouble getting out here."

"Not at all, sir. I enjoy spending time with Elphaba under whatever circumstances, anyway." He answered honestly.

Elphaba's face darkened noticeably. "Anyway," she said quickly, "I think we'd all like to get settled."

"Oh, of course! Nessa and Nanny, you'll stay in Nessa's old room. Elphaba, you'll stay in your room. Fiyero, I hope you don't mind, you'll be sharing a room with Elphaba's younger brother, Shell. There's a mattress on the floor, but Shell is sometimes quite talkative," Frex glared at Elphaba when she snorted at this.

"That's fine, sir." Fiyero replied.

"Elphaba can show you the way. It's right next to her room, anyway."

Elphaba showed him to Shell's room and knocked on the door. "Shell?"

There was a crash and a small, scrawny boy opened the door. "Are you Prince Fiyero?" He asked Fiyero. "My Dad said you'd be staying in my room."

Elphaba rolled her eyes. "Yes, this is Fiyero. Dinner's in an hour. I'll see you both later." She closed the door and went into her own room, thinking faintly that she was, oddly, the only one aside from her father who currently didn't have to share a room, though there was a bed on the other side of hers. No one had ever used it, as far as she could remember. She supposed they'd put it in for Nessarose, but it had turned out Nessa had needed to have Nanny with her all of the time. Still, Elphaba had her own room. Funny, wasn't it? She wasn't even the favorite.

There was a knock on the door. "Elphie, it's Fiyero, can I come in?"

"Sure," she called back. He stepped into the room and made to close the door behind him. "Don't shut it all the way. Daddy won't have it. Oz forbid you and I be in my room alone with the door closed."

Fiyero shut the door as much as possible without actually closing it. "Did you know your little brother has just discovered what sex is? That's the second thing he asked me when I started unpacking 'have you and Fabala had sex yet?'. I said 'no' and he asked why not and I told him that most people don't do that until they're married and… I don't think your dad explained it very well to him."

"That would be just like the both of them." Elphaba affirmed. "I'm sorry you're stuck in his room. I'd ask for you to stay in here, but that would be," her voice turned low and sardonic, "dreadfully inappropriate, even if you were just sleeping on the complete opposite side of the room."

"But there's actually a bed here."

"I know. My father… well, you're a boy and I'm a girl."

"Excuse me, we're nineteen. 'Boy' and 'girl' don't work anymore."

"Fine. You're a man and I'm a woman, which is worse than a boy and a girl, you know, and he's paranoid. I'll try and bring it up after dinner, I guess, but you shouldn't be there when I do. Any hint that it's your idea won't look good. After all, according to father, men only think of one thing."

"Oh? We do?"

"I never said you did. But he thinks all college men think about is sex."

"It's not true. I think about you a lot, but not sex."

Elphaba flushed. "Fiyero…"

"I'm not lying."

"Okay, whatever. Please, don't talk that way." She moved about the room quickly.

He stepped closer and caught her by the waist. Fiyero looked down slightly into her eyes. "Would you stop rejecting me every time I try to be affectionate?"

"Not if we're in my house. My father will walk in at any second. Fiyero, please."

He sighed and let go of her. "Sorry."

"Don't be. You, my sweet, have nothing to apologize for." She kissed him on the cheek swiftly and walked towards the window. Elphaba perched on a wooden chair and looked out at the sun setting. "What's your family like?"

Fiyero sighed. This was exactly the subject he didn't want to talk about. "They're absolutely crazy. Well, maybe it's not them, exactly, but the customs out there are odd. I won't even discuss them with you; it'd be inappropriate."

She raised her eyebrows but said nothing.

Fiyero pushed her over in the chair and they both sat on it, Elphaba practically in his lap, looking out the window until there was a knock on the door and dinner was served.

Elphaba was able to persuade her father to allow Fiyero to switch rooms simply by repeating what Shell had said to Fiyero. Her father was going to have a long talk with Shell later. She changed into her nightgown and sat on her bed, kicking her feet, when Fiyero came in. "Hey."

"Am I allowed to close the door?"

"Not all of the way."

And so he pushed the door as close to closed as he could and then sat down in the bed across from the one Elphaba was in. "Would it be wrong if I asked for a kiss goodnight?"

Elphaba was glad the darkness was hiding her blush. She got up and kissed him sweetly. "Goodnight." With that, went back to her bed.

"Goodnight. Sweet dreams."

Elphaba didn't sleep for a long time. She simply stared at Fiyero's form in the other bed, wondering why he hadn't chosen to say "I love you" again.

The summer holidays went by fast. There was always something to do around Nest Hardings. They often spent time outside when it wasn't raining. When it was, sometimes they'd sit inside while Nanny and Nessa went on a "walk". It was one of these days the day before they were to leave for Shiz again.

Frex and Shell had joined Nanny and Nessa (shocking Elphaba by leaving her alone with Fiyero). Elphaba was curled up on her bed with a book when Fiyero came in from snacking in the kitchen. He got onto her bed as well and slipped an arm around her, kissing her chin. "What are you reading?"

"Well, you mentioned a while ago about strange customs in the Vinkus, so I figured I'd research it. Unfortunately, the only book in our bookstore is outdated by about a hundred years, so Oz only knows if it's accurate. I should hope it's not because this all sounds very ridiculous to me. Women are not slaves out there, are they?"

"Not that I know of," Fiyero tried. He wasn't sure what Elphaba defined as "slaves". "My mother seems to have a pretty easy time."

"Oh. Well, that's a good thing."

"What else is in that book?"

"Really strange stuff. Stuff I'm too embarrassed to even talk about!"

"Like what?"

"Odd sex rituals. And they don't sound like too much fun, either, at least not from a woman's point of view."

"I don't know what you're talking about, so I think I'll just not ask." Fiyero decided. But did he not know because it didn't exist or because no one had told him?

"Yeah. And then there's all these really interesting myths. Do you still worship many gods?"

"It's why I get called a pagan."

"I think it's kind of interesting, actually." Elphaba said honestly. "It's the most appealing religion I've heard of in my almost twenty years of living."

Fiyero closed his eyes for a moment. Why did she have to bring up the fact that he was almost twenty? "Elphie, when we get back at Shiz, remind me I need to tell you something…"