Writers Block - Chapter 4

I Cannot believe it! I cannot actually believe what happened this morning! He was so close to me, I had the opportunity to just kiss him, right there! Why didn't I? How is it possible to meet someone for the first time and go from hating them to wanting to rip their clothes off?

Was I dreaming? I mean, one minute I'm being carried through the woods, and I woke up, am I about to wake up after the most perfect looking creature kissed me! Kissed ME! I, Isabella Swan was caressed by Edward Cullen.

Why did he walk away? Why didn't he kiss me on the lips?

Stop it Bella, it's part of him game plan! He wants you to want him! But you've only just met him!

He basically kissed me on my neck, and hovered there for what felt like forever. Then pinched my chin and gave me the most adorable smile, turned around and left! It wasn't even 12.30! It was 8.30! That's not fair!

Maybe I should got to Carlisle Cullen and mention Edward has gone AWOL? Actually that's a stupid idea!

I didn't go looking for Edward after he left. If he want's to wander round he can. Maybe Rosalie "I'm a slut" Duvall has gotten her nails into him by now! Why was I angry? I've never felt this way before. I feel used, hurt and abandoned! How is it acceptable to lead someone on and then leave? Is this what all guys do or just the Cullens? I'm sure there was truth in the rumours that Jessica the mail girl was sleeping with Emmett and Carlisle found out and paid her off to leave well alone! Maybe Edward has been warned to stay away from any girls in the office! Surely I'm an exception. No one in this building, not even Alfie the security guard has looked at me with a flirtatious eye! But Edward did, that's not something I will forget easily!

The door creeps open! Its Rosalie! What the fuck does she want? She never comes up to my block, let alone my office.

"Bella, good morning!" grinned the bitch.

"Rosalie! To what do I owe this pleasure?" I said unenthusiastically.

"Well….I've just bumped into Carlisle Cullen. He mentioned you were chaperoning Edward Cullen. Where is he? I thought I would formally introduce myself!" She let out a pathetic giggle.

"yeah, I was showing him round earlier, then he left!" He gritted my teeth.

She's got a sly grin! She's up to something!

She let out a loud shriek. "Don't worry I will be bumping into him, I've heard he's handsome! Ideally he will want the company of a beautiful girl such as myself, so I thought I'd make you a proposition! You let Carlisle believe your showing Edward the ropes, but I will instead! We'll keep it quiet, you can carry on with your head in your books and research and I can put my beauty to good use! Deal?"

No fucking deal! What does she think this is? Mention Emmett, MENTION EMMETT!

"What about Emmett? I thought you too were hitting things off. I'm ok showing him round, But thanks for the offer!" I was really, really trying to keep my cool with her.

"Listen Bella, You just keep yourself to yourself! And keep your nose out of me and Emmett! I am showing Edward round, there's is no competition! He will see I am marvellously beautiful and voila he will realise I look better walking besides him than plain Jane. Comprendez? Good Day Bella!"

And she walked out! Stormed out! What is she trying to do? I could feel my blood boil, the hairs on my arms standing on end. I've never felt the need to protect someone before, I'd never felt jealousy before. Until now!

All that afternoon I kept myself to myself. I was well and truly fed up. I just got my drafts in, locked up and headed home.

I'd not bumped back into Edward but I thought of him all day. Even when I got back to my flat, he was on my mind. I was addicted to Edward Cullen.

I opened my fridge, cheese, milk, tuna. I sighed. "for fuck sake" looked like a takeout. I never seemed to have time lately to go shopping.

I really was plain Jane. I felt inadequate, like if I didn't go into work tomorrow I wouldn't be missed. I was used to being me boring Bella. Bella who kept her mouth shut and got on with it. How is it, that in one morning I want to transform myself. I want to take my credit card and go shopping, to shop until I drop. Buy all the nice designer clothing. I hated shopping yesterday. And the day before that. And the day before that! I've never liked shopping! Never!

I walked through to the lounge, the maid had been.

Yes I have a maid. She cleans around for me. What? I don't have time. Yeah right, actually that and I'm lazy. Clumsy. I could burn a pan of hot water I'm that useless.

"Useless" I said out loud.

There were a couple of letters on the side. One printed in bold CONFIDENTIAL. I didn't have to open it. Credit card statement. The other was hand written. I started to rip open the seal when I realised it wasn't stamped, it was hand delivered. The letter was addressed:

ISABELLA SWAN

3A FORKES HOUSE

NEW YORK

I never receive letters other than bills. Unless its from Renee. Renee is my mom, she lives in Florida with my step dad Phil. He's some sort of sports hero out there.

I opened the letter. It was a blank postcard. This made no sense. I flipped it over, on the front was a picture of some shoes. This was weird. Why would someone send me a postcard, a blank postcard?

I threw the postcard onto the worktop. Someone was obviously having a prank. I don't have a pen pal. Maybe my mom thought the shoes were cute and she would send me the picture. I'll probably have a full mailbox on my telephone from her explaining what this is.

I walk over to the phone. 3 messages hmmmm.

First message:

"Hi Bells its dad, just calling to see how you're doing. I've been fishing today, caught a beauty! You would have been proud! It's been quiet round here. Me and Billy decided …"

Message deleted.

I'll call him later!

Next message.

"Bella, this is your mother here. Why aren't you returning my phone calls? This New York lifestyle is going to your head. Your from out in the stix. Us folk actually speak to one another. Helloooo. If you're ignoring this I won't be happ…"

Message deleted.

I WILL seriously call her back later!

Next Message.

"Erm….ummm…Oh Bollocks!"

End of messages.

Wait! I didn't delete that one!

That voice I would recognise anywhere. I had played it over and over in my head. It was an English accent. Edward. Edward Cullen!

"Redial! Fucking Redial!" I was shouting aloud at myself!

The caller withheld their number.

Of course they did! Just my fucking luck!

This was getting weird. Why was he calling me? In fact scrap that. How is he calling me? How has Edward Cullen gotten my number? The postcard! He commented on how "nice" my shoes were this morning! The post card had shoes on! Makes perfect sense! But why?

I walked through to the bathroom and started to run a bath. I was so tired. All these emotions had exhausted me today! I felt sick. Sick to go to work tomorrow! Sick at what might happen. Sick at seeing Rosalie's face! She'll have some big grin when she see's me and its her and her long legs leading him down the corridor!

I slipped out of my black trousers and lime green shirt! The shirt didn't seem to go down well. I overheard the mail boys laughing "have you seen the dudette who looks like a pop ice?" I gathered that was about me. Well it's the bin for that one!

I dipped my toe into the warm water, and slowly lowered myself in! I exhaled a sigh of relief. Relief to be home. My safe haven! I closed my eyes and tried to phase into some sort of meditating state. I'd heard it was good to collect your thoughts and then release the bad ones! Or something I read in a crappy article in a country magazine.

And no. I didn't write that one!

I could feel myself slipping out of consciousness, the water was so warm against my skin, I could almost hear my muscles thanking me!

I opened my eyes.

JESUS!

And right there before my eyes was an angel. An angel from above. Smiling at me. Smiling at Isabella swan. A naked Isabella swan. I was dreaming.

"You really should lock your door Bella!" the angel spoke.

I'm not dreaming.

I was speechless. There standing in front of my was Edward Cullen. I couldn't speak. I couldn't move. I couldn't jump out and throw my clothes on. I was frozen. All I managed to come out with was….

"I'm useless!"

My jaw had hit the floor. He just stood there gazing at me…..that pearly white smile.

"Yes you are Bella, Yes you are!" he chuckled.