Wow it's a lot harder for me to write a nice love scene, than a rough one :-) I hope I did these two justice. I'm going to be wrapping up this story very soon. The last chapter or two will be an epilogue of sorts. Thanks for reading!

Chapter 18

It had been six months since David had attacked her, Lina looked at herself in the mirror. There was no physical evidence of the attack on her body anymore. She felt like she was back to herself. She and Merle hadn't done anything sexually beyond kissing and heavy petting over her clothes. At first it was easy, Merle was still recovering and his sex drive was pushed to the back burner as he dealt with his other symptoms, then they had been busy moving into their new home, and the bikers really loved the brother's work and were coming over to get work done more and more often. But now that they were settled in their new home, and they were both in a better place physically and mentally, she could tell Merle was beginning to need something more from her.

She remembered their first coupling, it had been cold and painful. Things were different between them now, the sex would be different too. She was surprised to find that she didn't worry about flashing back to David, Merle couldn't be more different from that man if he tried. What she worried about was her ignorance about the whole subject. The three times she'd had sex, weren't very educational. She'd mostly just lain there. She didn't want to be disappointing to Merle, who had so much experience.

As if on cue Merle walked into the room smiling at seeing her in only her bra and a pair of shorts. He walked up behind her, putting his arms around her waist, he began kissing her neck. Lina closed her eyes, Merle was always so warm, warm and dry. His rough hands felt good on her stomach.

"I ain't never seen your tits ya know." He ran his thumbs over her nipples, bringing them to life under the fabric of her bra.

Lina bit her lip, "You might be disappointed, they aren't very big."

Merle kissed her cheek, "Bigger ain't always better honey. Daryl said he and Johnny wouldn't be back from huntin' till tomorra." He ran his thumb just underneath the fabric of her bra straps.

"Merle," she watched him in the mirror. He ducked his head down trying to hide his disappointment.

"Yeah?" he brought his hand back down to her waist.

"I think I might be ready to try some things." He looked up hopefully.

"Things?" he questioned.

"I don't know where we should begin, or where to stop, or even if we should stop. I'll leave it up to you…unless it gets bad."

"Naw, baby. I may be a bastard but I can do this for ya. We'll start from the beginin' like I should have done ya the first time. We'll get there when we get there."

She turned to face him, "OK, It'll be our real first time."

Merle swallowed, this was a big deal, he'd been looking forward to this for a while now. The weight of it surprised him. Sex hadn't meant anything in so long, to have it mean so much was scary. He leaned in to kiss her lips, wrapping her up in his arms, he willed his body to override his mind and take control. He would feel her out, Merle was good in bed, he could tell when he was making a woman feel good, he just had to pay extra attention to Lina. He would ensure that sex with him would be nothing but absolute pleasure. He looked into her eyes and nearly chickened out.

"Why, Lina? Why would you trust me with this, after David, after me? I ain't never given you a reason to trust me."

"I don't always know why you, it just is, but you have given me a reason to trust you Merle. You defended me when no one else has, you make me feel safe. Look what you and Daryl have done for me. You bought me a house. You're a wonderful father to Johnny. How could I not trust you?" she ran her hand softly down his cheek, a sad look in her eyes. "I wonder why me, all the time. What changed your mind about me? Why aren't you ashamed of me anymore?"

"I was a fuckin' idiot, Lina. Listenin' to the bullshit my daddy fed me." He leaned down to kiss her nose. "You've been hearin' that shit for too damn long and you believe it don't ya, that you ain't good enough?"

She didn't answer, instead she leaned her forehead on his chest and gripped his shirt tightly in her hands.

"Let's forget it all baby. Let's start new. You, me, Johnny and Daryl, we'll be the new Dixons. New and improved. Yeah?"

"Yeah." She grinned up at him. There was no fixing the past, not for any of them, they were always going to be the outcasts of this shitty little town and it didn't matter one bit, cause now they had each other.

He picked her up and spun her around in his arms, till she giggled. "So you gonna let me see them titties or what?" he wiggled his eyebrows at her.

"Or what!" she laughed trying to run past him. Merle was too quick, he caught her around the waist, and dragged her back, throwing them both onto the bed.

She opened her mouth to protest, till she caught sight of Merle's eyes. All playfulness was gone, in it's place was unbridled lust. Lina felt an ache pool in between her legs. She rubbed them together unconsciously.

"Do you want me?" Merle looked down at what she was doing. She blushed.

"No need to get embarrassed sweetheart. It ain't any good if you don't want it. You're supposed to want it."

She blushed even more, "I never really have before. It just happened."

"I shoulda done better," he smoothed her hair down. "Didn't Daryl?"

"Merle, I don't know if we should…"

"I ain't happy about talkin' 'bout my brother n you neither, but if we gonna do this right, I should know."

"He…..well…he kissed me during….and…touched me there during." She was nearly purple with embarrassment. Merle swallowed his dislike of the whole situation.

"Did you like that?"

"I..well," she glanced at him and looked away. The last thing she wanted to do was insult Merle right now.

"Go ahead girl, let's get it over with."

She took a deep breath "It…yes…it felt good and it wasn't as cold as…well…you know."

She fidgeted with the hem of his shirt.

"That all he did?"

"Yeah, he passed out on top of me after. Then I got dressed and went home."

He kissed her cheek gently. Why this woman would have any interest in sex after the mess they had all made of it he didn't know, but he was grateful. He would have to fix it for her, make it right.

He reached for her bra strap slowly "If ya want me to stop somethin', say so. If ya got a question, ask it. OK." He slipped the strap down, watching her face carefully.

"Ok" she was blushing again, her innocent, trustful expression sending the blood rushing strait to his cock. He couldn't remember the last time he was this hard and horny. He reached behind her, snapping open the bra clasp. He pulled the bra off her taking in the way her small pert breasts stayed upright, her nipples hard just begging for his attention.

"No baby, bigger definitely ain't better. Mmmmhmmmm." He licked her right nipple, curling his tongue around the tight little nub before taking most of her breast in his mouth, giving her a gentle suck. Lina arched her back, sucking in a surprised breath. Merle moved so that he was kneeling between her legs, before he gave the same attention to her left breast.

"That feel good?"

She nodded biting her lip. He smiled at her giving her nipple one last little lick he straightened up and removed his shirt. Lina looked over his toned chest and arms. He may have been older but his body was amazing. He laid down on top of her, keeping most of his weight on his elbows, but making sure her breasts were pressed up against his chest. He kissed her deeply, rubbing his hard member, right where she was aching. She moaned into his mouth, she bit her lip embarrassed again.

"Don't stop, baby. Let me hear if somthin' feels good. How else am I gonna know I'm doin' it right." He ground into her again. She closed her eyes and brought her hips up to meet his, making a soft satisfied sound in the back of her throat. "That's my girl." He kissed her again.

Lina brought her arms around him and gripped his back, she opened her eyes when she felt rope like scars on his back. Merle had stopped kissing her and he stilled his movement.

"What's that Merle?" she asked him, as she ran her hand along a particularly long raised scar.

"Daddy." He said simply, like that would explain everything, and thanks to the things Daryl had told her, it did.

"I'm sorry, did I ruin everything?"

"Not unless you don't want to anymore."

"Why wouldn't I still want to?"

Merle thrusted his hips into her again. "I'm gonna eat your pussy Lina. You're gonna love it." He pulled back from her. Grabbing her shorts he began sliding them down her legs kiss her thighs as he made his way down. Lina closed her legs modestly.

Merle grabbed her knees. "You're gonna have to open up for me, baby. I promise you it will be worth it."

"I'm scared, Merle. What if you think it's ugly, or it tastes bad."

"Baby, I got a good look last time if ya don't remember and I hate bringin' this shit up but I've had some busted pussy. You're a clean good girl, ain't nothin' gonna turn me off of this sweetness." He pushed her legs apart, enjoying the way her breathing sped up with nervousness. He got himself in position, breathing in the scent of her before taking a long, slow lick.

"mmmmm, delicious." He assured her.

Lina's eyes rolled to the back of her head as Merle worked on her. She had never imagined such pleasure. His tongue circled her nub, in different patterns, he dipped the tip inside her and flicked it quickly causing her breath to hitch. She was beginning to feel that strange feeling again, the one she felt while Daryl was playing with her. Her hips began to jerk and Merle took the hint, he took her nub into his mouth and sucked hard, she came undone, her body spasming in pleasure.

"Oh God Merle!" he continued licking until her body stilled.

He crawled back up her body, "Are you ready for me Lina?" he wiped his face on his shoulder, getting the juices off his mouth before he kissed her.

"Shouldn't I do something for you?" She knew about blow jobs, not really how to give a blow job, but she knew men liked them.

"Next time, honey. Right now I just want to be inside you."

"I'm ready."

Merle got up quickly, ridding himself of the rest of his clothes. Lina looked at him curiously, she hadn't seen him last time. His penis looked huge to her, thick and long. Had she really had that inside her? No wonder it hurt so bad. He smiled at her,

"Want to touch it?" he stepped closer. She nodded reaching out for him, it was so soft and smooth, yet hard as a rock. Merle moaned putting his hand around hers, he moved them both up and down his length.

"Lay down sweetheart." His voice was raspy with need.

She did as he asked, her heart beating hard in her chest. He placed himself between her legs again.

"Look at me baby." He leaned on his left elbow, before using his right hand to guide himself into her. He saw her eyes widen slightly then close as she let out a deep moan that matched his own.

She was as warm and tight as he remembered. It felt just as good as coming home after a stint in jail. He hadn't admitted it to anyone, but he had spent many a night jerking off to the memory of Lina's tight little pussy, in fact she had been the only star of his fantasies in all those long months. He began moving slow and deep. He'd gone without for a while now and was fighting the urge to pound away to completion. Merle kept the pace steady, searching subtly for her special spot. He shifted a bit to the right and was rewarded with a sharp jerk of her hips and an "Oh God." Grinning he kept at that spot, while kissing her with everything he had, she'd said she liked kissing during, and she was right, it did feel good.

He felt her orgasm rip through her, her tight canal gripping him as she twitched underneath him. He allowed himself to go faster now, the tightness bringing him to his climax after a few pumps. He let himself fall to his side gathering Lina's small frame to him.

"Did you like that?" He was breathing heavy. She nodded into his chest before sitting up and looking at him.

"It was better than in the books. The first time, I was sad because it wasn't like in the books, but this time, this time it was so much better. Better than I imagined it could be, could we do it again Merle? Could you teach me to do things for you?"

Merle laughed, "Hell yeah baby! We'll do it any damn time you want. You got yourself a man that will never say no." he brought her in for another kiss. Mission accomplished

Merle was teaching her how to do the reverse cowgirl when Daryl walked into the room the next morning.
"Jesus! Next time lock the damn door!" he yelled as he walked down the hall, grateful that he'd put Johnny down for a nap before walking in.

"Next time knock on the damn door!" Merle yelled back at him.

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Life was good, Merle and Daryl ended up with too much business to handle in the back yard anymore and cut a deal with Tom, they would use his garage, be their own branch, their own bosses, focusing on bikes and choppers. Tom would get a cut, he was eager to go into business with the brothers, bikers from all over Georgia and even some out of towners had heard about them and were coming into town to get work done on their bikes specifically.

Lina had to move from full time with the hospital to part-time, Merle didn't want to spend money hiring anyone to do their scheduling and paper work at the garage and neither him, nor Daryl had the patience for that sort of thing. Lina won the job by default, she was accepting calls and working out appointments before she even knew what was happening. Merle would answer his phone, then hand it to her with the notebook he kept his appointments in and walk out of the living room, leaving her to figure things out. Daryl did the same thing except he wouldn't bother telling the people at the other end that they were being handed over to someone else.

Lina exasperated and confused by their lack of organization and unable to read their chicken scratch writing most of the time had taken over completely, it wasn't long until she was a fixture, along with Johnny, on their side of the garage. Merle was a genius when it came to the practical side of things, he could fix any problem and find a solution to any logistical issue the guys ran into. Daryl was more creative, he could come up with designs and features that made people's jaws drop with awe. He was a hell of an artist and could air brush any design they gave him. Lina played to their strengths, booking the customers accordingly. The money began pouring in.

The bikers were rough, but they soon learned if they wanted to get their shit done by the best, they had better treat Lina with the up most respect. The leader of a small bike club was the first to hear of the strange arrangement the brothers had with Lina.

Mike was staring at Lina's ass as she bent over to give Johnny a snack one day at the shop. He looked up to find Daryl glaring at him with his arms crossed over his chest.

"Sorry man, I know she's your brother's woman but she's a hot piece, I was just lookin'."

"She ain't just my brothers woman, she's the mother of our son, keep your damn eyes to yourself."

"Both your son? Is it like that?" He looked back at Lina an interested gleam in his eye.

Daryl stepped up closer to the man. "No, it ain't like that, how it is ain't none of your damn business. Lina ain't a whore to be passed around, if'n you're gonna be a pig around her, take your bike and get the fuck out."

"Hey man! I don't give a shit," the guy brought up his hands in an "I give up" gesture. "I ain't judgin' it's cool. I won't be lookin' no more, if you gonna get all pissy about it."

"Good, make sure your men know, she's off limits, to everyone for everything. She's ours." Daryl snarled before walking back to work on the man's bike.

The guy shook his head, What a weird bunch, the guys were gonna love this story. It was true that none of the bikers judged the trio, considering some of the shit they all got into, this wasn't much of anything at all, and if the Dixon's wanted to be stingy with their girl, fuck it, it didn't matter as long as their work was good, the boys found their entertainment elsewhere.

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Somewhere in the midst of all this good luck Merle started acting strange. He and Lina had been going at it like rabbits, never once using protection. Lina had brought it up one day.

"Merle, shouldn't we use something?" They had just finished a very satisfying romp, enjoying the fact that they had the house to themselves.

"What the fuck for? I ain't wrappin' it up now." Merle answered her.

"But I got pregnant so fast last time, what if it happens again?"

"So ain't like we can't afford it. Johnny needs a playmate anyway, good to keep the Dixon line goin'."

She smiled and hugged him closer, happy to hear that, she didn't want Johnny to be alone.

The happiness was short lived though, he began pulling away. Merle would come to bed drunk and pass out. He hardly touched her anymore and Lina would catch him staring at her hard anytime Daryl and she would talk. She would try to ask him about it, only to get blown off. One afternoon she caught him looking at Johnny with a sad look. He smoothed the boy's hair out of his face, studying him carefully.

"Are you ok Mere?" she asked hesitantly.

He didn't bother to answer her, he just stood up and walked out the front door. He still hadn't come home when she put Johnny to bed at night. She went to the kitchen and made herself a cup of coffee, he hadn't ever done this before, not since they decided to be in a relationship together. Her mind drifted off the days when they were first getting to know each other. In those days if Merle wasn't around at night it was because he was at the bar, or the strip club, he was either getting high or laid. She sat down to wait for him at the kitchen table with a heavy heart.

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She and Daryl were sitting at the kitchen table. "If he screwed it up I'm still here Lina, we ain't the same as you an him, but I ain't goin' no where. That baby in your belly will be mine just the same."

She looked up sharply "You know?"

"Yeah, I figured it out." Daryl grabbed her hand.

"Does he know?" the pain in her chest deepened. If he knew and still did this….

"No, I think that's the problem. He's been snappin' at me more too, pullin' away. It's cause we both know, Johnny's mine."

"You can't know, not for sure. Your brothers, he could just look like you." Lina murmured.

"Not that much Lina. He's me, just darker, it's too close. We don't know for sure, but we know."

"I wanted it to be you." She looked up at him, eyes shiny with unshed tears. "The first time with Merle was so unfeeling, I could have been a doll for all the attention he paid me, but with you, you tried a little, you made the effort to make me feel good. When I found out I was pregnant, I hoped it had been you. A little kindness was better than nothing. Then you guys decided to be part of our lives and everything changed. Merle was always around, holding me, kissing me, making me feel like I was something, and you were behind a wall. All I've been thinking about for months is sharing a baby with Merle, he said he wanted one. Now that it's finally happened, he's freezing me out."

"I'll be here Lina, I'll take this baby as my own, same as Johnny. You and I ain't like you and Merle, but if he fucked this up we could try."

"You should be with someone you want, Daryl, not an obligation. You could make a woman so happy, you don't give yourself enough credit. You're so worried about being your father, you don't see all the ways you're not."

"I wish that were true Lina, but it ain't. I ain't never wanted no woman. You the only one I like having around. I could try and take Merles place because I love you and I think it could work, but if I'd rather Merle not screw it up." He scooted closer and brought her in for a hug.

"I like it how it is now. I won't lie 'bout that, but things change, and we could change with it if we have to. We're family now, no matter what my dumbass brother does. OK?"

"Thank you, your my best friend, you know that?"

"Your mine." He kissed her cheek.

"Well, well, well what we have here?" Merle's voice came from the kitchen doorway.

"It's 2 'o clock, where the hell have you been?" Daryl stood up, glaring at his brother.

"Why? You miss me? Cause it sure as hell don't look like it." Merle's eyes were bloodshot.

"I feel sick, I need the restroom." Lina ran from the room. Merle watched her go, before turning to Daryl.

"Didn't waste any time did you brother?"

"WE didn't do a damn thing, but if you fucked this up like the simple minded piece of shit you are, then I'm gonna do whatever I need to." Daryl shoved his brother out of the way. He nodded at Lina as he passed her in the hall.

Merle was sitting at the kitchen table, Lina sat across from him.

"Is there something I should know?" her voice sounded hollow.

"I went to the "Flying J"."

"Have fun?" she was happy that the tears didn't come. She felt empty and cold.

"A few of the girls I used to run with were there."

When she didn't answer, he looked up at her. Lina was staring and her hands, clasped in front of her, expressionless. It had been a long time since he'd seen that look on her face. He knew she had shut down, just like she would when she was being berated and harassed.

"Jennifer was there." Still no reaction from her. "She wanted me to take her out back, like old times." Nothing. Sometimes Merle thought she could stand still in a hurricane and it would just blow around her.

Lina listened to his words, inside she felt colder and colder. She had been stupid, she had let herself believe in a dream and the world was righting its self again. She would deal, she had to. She not only had Johnny to worry about, but a new child growing inside her. She would have her children and a friend in Daryl. It wouldn't be fair to force Daryl into a relationship he didn't really want, and she wouldn't be stupid again, it hurt more than she ever imagined it would, but they were friends and that was something at least. Her heart felt like it was shattering, she breathed through it, she would listen to what he did. She would listen and learn to never be stupid again.

"You've got nothing to say?" still nothing not even a twitch from the woman in front of him. Her chest moved up and down in slow steady breaths, the only indication that she was still alive, still listening.

Merle stood up and walked around the table, he grabbed her upper arms, making her stand up. He grasped her chin and jerked her head up, forcing her to look at him. Her eyes were dead, devoid of any emotion. He fought the urge to shake her. Didn't she care at all? Didn't she give a shit about him? He released her, pushing her away from him roughly.

"I didn't fuckin' do it! In case you're interested! But don't let me keep you and your precious Daryl apart. We all know Johnny's his."

Lina blinked, "You didn't do it? You didn't do anything?"

"Disappointed? Didn't even let the bitch kiss me and here YOU are…"

"It's two in the morning," she interrupted him. "What were you doing?"

"What the fuck do you care?" he snarled at her.

That's when Lina broke down "What were you doing Merle?" she put her head in her hands, trying to calm the sobs that shook her body.

"I bought a bottle of Jack, I've been out in the woods, thinking 'bout how my brother and my woman have themselves a baby boy and I'm the fourth wheel." Merle's voice was quiet, he was going to say goodbye to Lina tonight, move on, let his brother have his family.

"And what about our baby." Lina let her hands fall from her face. Tears falling in streams from each eye as she tried to reach for him. Merle moved away.

"Johnny is Dary's, everyone who sees him knows it." He gripped the back of the chair closest to him. He felt like an outsider, like he had stolen his brother's family and now nature was insuring he had to give it back.

"I meant the baby I'm growing. The one who is undoubtedly yours and yours alone. The baby I made with absolute love and thought you did to." Lina put her hand on his shoulder. "I'm pregnant Merle."

For a second she thought he hadn't heard, he didn't move or make a sound. "Merle." She swallowed.

She was in his arms before she could even register his movement. "You mean it!" he was kissing her forehead, her cheeks everywhere he could reach without letting her go.

"Yes! Why did you do this Merle? Why did you disappear today? I thought you had thrown me away. I thought it was over."

"I couldn't pretend anymore, that Johnny was mine. I thought I was taking somethin' from you and my brother."

"Johnny IS yours Merle, two daddies is all he's known, you can't take that from him." Merle smoothed her hair down.

"I know, I was bein' selfish and stupid. This baby and any other baby's gonna have two daddies too. Daryl ain't goin' nowhere and neither am I. The three of us and as many of them as ya wanna pop out." He grinned.

"Don't do it again Merle, I felt like my world was crumbling." Lina hugged him tighter.

"I won't, weren't even tempted, can you believe it, Old Merle wants to be a family man." He squeezed her back, "Get on in here Daryl." He said a little louder. "I know you've been listenin'."

Daryl walked into the room. "Congratulations bro."

"Back at cha little brother." He brought him into the hug. "We's gonna have us another son."

"How do you know it's a boy?" Lina asked.

"It is." The brothers said in unison.