4 MONTHS LATER
Neria sat at the desk in her room pushing through stacks of paper. It was early evening on a Spring afternoon and sunlight pleasantly spilled across the vellum pages she eagerly flipped through. Even her scholarly activities could not distract her from her uneasy feelings she had carried over the last few months since her fight with Solas in the Exalted Plains. He still had not returned even after they had successfully freed his Spirit friend from her miserable fate.
She still was embarrassed thinking about the scene she had caused, even if she intuitively knew that Solas had needed to be confronted on his uncertainty. Still, even now she could feel the heat rise to her face when she replayed the words she had hurled at him. The way he looked at me that morning…it was almost the same way he looked at those mages that had summoned the spirit.
While her words had been true, so had some of his. They had cut her. She had been playing with him like she had the younger men of her clan. As the Keeper's second she had a line of suitors who all were focused on winning her affections. They had called her the white wolf, her flirting daring and aggressive. She had thought the same routine would work on Solas. She had guessed wrong…very badly. She didn't know what had happened to Solas to make him so removed from this world, so focused on the past…but it had to have…been devastating.
"There is a sea of blood, her body is on the ground asking for vengeance, but even you with all your power cannot save her," Cole had darkly revealed in his unprompted ramblings, "She is dead and can no longer hear her children. Your hands are covered in dark warm liquid…everyone will blame…"
Solas had hurriedly hushed him, "Cole, please anything but that… you can't help."
Neria couldn't help wondering what Cole described…maybe a wife? He certainly was old enough to have been married. Children? Probably. Had he lost them all?
She couldn't deny it. Neria missed Solas—and as much as she hated to admit it, she needed him. She sighed as she looked at the pile of old manuscripts she had taken from his desk. She knew she needed his help to decipher the ancient glyphs. As Leliana had pointed out, besides a few former experts that had lived in the Circle (who were probably now either dead or missing) no one had such a command of ancient elven as Solas did. Skyhold had tried to help her unravel their mysteries. She was glad to have allied with the mages, she had learned so much, however, the largely human army had little time to care about the mystical rubbish of Ancient Arlathan. Still…Solas had mentioned the orb that Corypheus carried was an old relic…maybe if she could find a description in these pages she could come closer to defeating him…
It was strange for her to need someone.
Still, it was almost dinnertime. She was hungry. She was always hungry…
She got up quickly from her chair. She was excited to join the others in the main hall for dinner. After traveling almost the entire winter she would treasure the few weeks she would be able to stay at Skyhold. Over the last few months there had been victories. She, Blackwall, Vivienne and Cassandra had foiled Corphyeus' attempts at gathering an army…liberating the Gray Wardens. As much as she had hated to, she had sent them far away…she couldn't risk the magister's influence on their order.
She was still shaken from the battle, her journey through Redcliff hadn't even been this terrible…but she was grateful for more answers.
They had come to her in another trip through the Fade. There were no known individuals that had entered the Fade and returned…twice. There had been loses, yes, Stroud had died nobly….she was still shaken…
They had just returned last night. The trip back had been slow, she had been able to compartmentalize some of the damage, but she had hoped so desperately that Solas would be in his study on her return. Like every other homecoming she had tried to escape notice as she ran to his study. Would she ever see him again? Where was he? Even Leliana was worried. She wished he was here more than anything—even if it was selfish. How she would like to tell him what the Black City had looked like on the horizon…
Sighing, she began to walk through the hallways. Neria was pleased at the repairs that had been made in her absence, they were entertaining more and more nobles, gaining more and more power. Soon, they would be traveling to the court of Orlais…
Walking through the dark courtyard, she walked out onto the steps that overlooked the central entrance….was that…it was…
"Solas," she whispered out loud.
Her immediate impulse was to rush, but she stopped herself from running. She would let him approach her.
Towards the entrance she could see him standing at the gate laughing with Cole. She couldn't hear what was being said, but Cole gesticulated wildly the way he did when he said something provocative. How was it always at the worst moments? She swore he somehow did it on purpose. Solas froze, looking in her direction he confirmed that Cole must have said one of her deepest, darkest secrets.
Solas smiled, waving. She waved back. He had to have made peace with what she had said if he greeted her so warmly. Why else would he walk towards her so quickly?
"Neria…" he began almost sheepishly, looking up to her from the bottom of the stairs.
"Where were you…I…was worried" she replied as he climbed one star after another.
Was that a limp she saw? He seemed to be leaning on his staff more than usual. Maybe he was just tired.
"No need…to worry…" he said quietly as though reading her mind.
She cut him off, reaching out for his arm tenderly…."Solas."
She could feel his hand touching her face softly. This was the touch of a lover. She had craved this. Making eye contact for the first time in months she stared up into his blue eyes feeling nothing but vulnerability. There was some sort of new understanding between the two of them. Was his heart fluttering the same way?
Solas broke the silence…"We shouldn't talk here…we should go somewhere else," he gestured to the always present onlookers who couldn't help but be curious over his return.
Nodding, she agreed trailing off "Yes…" Gaining courage by the way she caught him looking at her with a bemused smile, she continued grabbing his hand before he could stop her…"My room…its…"
If nothing had started rumors before this, certainly the Hearld of Andraste leading an apostate mage boldy through the throne room, past screaming merchants, one curious Varric and half a dozen servants readying the evening meal did. Turning to one of them to say, "Send dinner up, but after that we are not to be disturbed…" inspired several tavern songs that would follow her for the rest of her life.