Sitting on the couch, sandwiched by two men quite capable and strong while watching some sort of cheesy romance movie. To many ladies, this would be a dream. To her, a nightmare. Only she tried to watch the film, shoving popcorn in her mouth at an alarming rate as she tried to ignore the two opposing males. Arms crossed their chests and their false smiles vanished as though they were never there to begin with. Not a comforting situation to say the least. Still, Seras did her best to ignore them.

When the movie started, originally they all sat in their own seats. Yet, slowly but sure Jarred began to creep up beside her until their arms were practically plastered together. It didn't take long for Anderson to notice the subtle but rather provoking act and without a second thought gave the other a glare and slid his arm around her shoulders, promptly pulling her until she was pressed completely to his side. Now, they were having a kicking and glaring war with poor Seras in between.

It wasn't until the end credits did the gloves really come off though, the tension so thick she could barely see through the testosterone filled air. Nobody made a move to shut off the scene, clean up or even stretch. No, one movement could set off the bomb and that in itself would be too risky. Seras didn't want to lose the house, Anders didn't want to have to hide the body, and Jarred didn't want to lose the opportune moment to remove the Irish man's unmentionables.

"You know Kitten, I don't see why you don't just move to England." Jarred complained with a pout. "There are plenty of churches for... him to go to and all of your friends are there! Why, who would want to stay on this muddy little spot of earth when you can stay with those with at least some manners."

Anders glared venomously at him, growling lowly as he gave the other an open scowl. Almost thoughtlessly, he tightened his grip around her shoulders and pulled her practically in his lap as he tried to scare off the other male. Not that it worked. In fact, it seemed to encourage the deranged cop into batting his eyes and leaning into her, putting one hand delicately on her thigh as he breathed a sad sigh on her face.

"I just can't help but worry you know. After all, I've known you for years." Anders felt his eye twitch much to the smug and slightly arrogant Brit's delight. "I just want what's best for you. Your house is there too isn't it? Why, I can hardly see why staying here would be any different then being there save that fact your friends would be there for you. It's rather hard getting across that border you know."

"Is it really? I didn't have many problems." Seras blinked innocently at Jarred, her large blue eyes staring back at him with curiosity. Oddly Anders didn't feel the urge to snap, to throw things, or even shove her off and storm away. No, it was a brief but sudden emotion that was more confusing then the newest cop's choice of clothes. A snap of...alarm? Why? "Anyway, it doesn't matter. I'm staying here."

"...At least think about it." Jarred tried to reason. "I don't want you to make a mistake is all."

"Oh, no worries! I'll be fine." Seras beamed in response, patting a hand gently on Alex's leg as she gave a delighted giggle. "Alex will keep an eye on me. Between the two of us, we'll figure it out no problem! I mean, just look at happy we are now. If it wasn't for him, I doubt we'd have any good food in the house and then all that chocolate and no work outs would go straight to my hips. Then I'd start wandering around looking like a pear!"

"Oh sweet heart, you would look good either way!" Jarred cooed, leaning over and snuggling firmly into her, ignoring the irritated twitch from the priest above. "Even if people leave you behind, I'll be there for you!"

" If yer meanin' me, I dun mind eider way." Anders pointed out sharply. "Da lord made a wooman ah sheh shood beh. Noot 'ow da rest 'f dis planet thinks."

"See? Alex isn't going anywhere soon, so I'll be just fine!"

"...I see that." Jarred smiled tightly at her, his body locked in a vice as he turned to glare flaming eyes at the Alex. They're eyes locked and they snarled at each other with their minds, too intent on hiding it from the 'weef' to actually allow them to escape on their faces. Now, Anders was a rather patient and normally gentle man when it came to regular humans. Yet had so many years not taught him restraint, he was pretty sure that thin man would be shoved through a wall. Nobody was taking his wife. Not from him.

"So, who wants to watch another movie?"

"...Hm? D'n weh joost finish oon?" Anders paused to frown down at his wife. He idly pulled at her blond locks as she began to look sheepish, opening her mouth to answer him only to have Whiplash interrupt her with a happy coo and a snuggle. Anders growled darkly.

"I think it's a wonderful idea! What sort of movie?" Jarred cried as he none to subtly rubbed his face hard into her side. She frowned at him before glancing over at Anders. "What is it darling? Is he bugging you? If he doesn't want to watch anything else then he can go to bed for heaven sake! Come on now, which one do you want to watch with your dearest old friend?"

"I don't really know...What about you Alex? Is there something you'd like to watch?"

"Mmm. Noot Really." Anders shrugged. Relieving his hold temporarily on the blond he groaned, stretching his aching limbs with a dull frown. not soon after it was finish though, it went back to its original place as he hummed with disinteret. "Joost noo mer 'o dat kissin' crap. Yer brain's gonna ooze out yer ears 'n dat ol' mate 's gonna 'ave to shoovel 'm back in."

"Like you'd know anything of a good romance." Whiplash sniffed as he gave a dramatic sigh and flicked his hair out of the way. Getting to his feet, Jarred sauntered to the DVD collection and promtly began picking through them. Anders growled irritably, not that either of the brits noticed."Oh, I suppose it'll be up to us then darling. Oh~! What about this one? It has quite the cute puppy on the front and I know how much you like dogs!"

"Oh? What is it?"

"It's called 'Marley and Me'. Quite the catch that man too, hmm." He shot a stink eye at Anders. "Quite better looking then some I might add. Oh, and the lady is nice looking too!"

"...Yer quite da mystery, t'aint cha?"

"Quite Frankenstein. Alright kitten, here we go!" With that the movie was in and sir Jarred replaced his buttocks to their 'proper' place. Immediately the movie started out seemingly pleasant yet something about it bugged Anders. Something... Something about the dog, something one of the nuns mentioned...?

The end credits rolled and never had more tissues littered the damned floor. Only Anders was able to hold out in a semi-tearless state as he stared with watery eyes at the screen. At his side, the two were a mess. Seras hid her face in tissues while the opposing male openly bawled. To be truthful, he'd remember with dull horror exactly what the nun had said half way through the movie, when he was getting fond of the dog himself. So, he'd hoped he was wrong. Yet no, they went and killed the blasted thing and reduced two egotistical males into teary idiots that sat on either side of a nearly hysterical woman.

"Why aren't you crying? Brute! Monster! I suppose the doctor forgot to add feelings when he screwed you together, Frankenstein!" Jarred yowled as he blew his nose in yet another tissue. "This shows how heartless you are! You Irish have no sense of feelings, not like us British! Oh, why did they have to kill the dog?! Kill the stupid man instead! Or a kid! Kill that one, but not the dog!"

"Yer priorities 'r messed."

"MONSTER!"

"I HATE THESE MOVIES!" Seras wailed as she stood abruptly and fled the room with loud sobs and hiccups. "I DON'T LIKE LOOKING LIKE THIS! I LOOK LIKE A MONSTER, MY NOSE WON'T STOP RUNNING, AND JARRED IS IN NO CONDITION TO DRIVE! A-Alex... can you fix him the couch please...?"

Anders stared in disbelief at the doorway, his eyes drifting slowly to glare warily at his current couchmate. Noticing the smug gleam in his eye, Alex growled lowly, his lip curling up in clear disgust. Filthy trick you bastard. I know, but I've won this round. He growled darkly as he stood with a sharp and rather stiff movement. Glaring down at the male he sneered.

"C'mon then ya bloody twat." Alex sneered. "Yer sittin' on yer bed."

"Oh? and here I thought I was going to sleep with you and Seras, the pity." was the sarcastic reply. "Any chance for a sheet or pillow? Honestly, you lack of manners is disgraceful for a priest."

Oh for- Well, this was going to be a long night.

Sorry for the late post again. Midnight shift got started up again so I'm usually pretty whooped. I'm gonna aim for at least 1 a month but no promises. P: Sorry for those who are gettin' impatient though. really I am. :( Anyway, REVIEW! They've been known to encourage me to write so the more the better. :D Criticism is always welcome so long as it isn't just bein an ass kind and I love to hear from you guys. :D WOO!

Cookiethief