Leaving Gibbs' house felt unreal. She was following a van that had Ari's body inside and two SUV's that escorted it. They were headed to the Israeli Embassy, where arrangements would be made to transport his body back to Israel, along with Ziva. When they got there, everything was complete chaos. Phones were ringing, people were talking rather loudly, Ziva was practically being interrogated by her own people and she was trying to avoid talking to her father. At least until she got to Tel Aviv.
It was now well past one in the morning when she decided she'd had enough. It had been a really long and exhausting day and the last thing she needed was to be overwhelmed by questions and autopsy reports and her father's voice echoing in her head. She needed to leave. As soon as possible.
So she did.
She started driving around a city she didn't know well enough. She drove around for about an hour before she found herself parking outside a certain very special NCIS agent's building. How had she gotten to his house? She had no idea. So she stayed in her car, trying to decide on whether she should go upstairs and knock on his door or just drive away to a hotel, as far away from the Embassy as possible. Again, without even thinking about it, she was out of her car and walking up the stairs to Tony's apartment. He had no clue she was coming.
Tony was sitting on his couch, watching Magnum P.I and drinking wine. It had been a long couple of days for him, too, so he thought he deserved it. He was thinking about Kate and her funeral, which was two days away. SecNav had arranged for a flight to take the whole team to Indiana, where Kate was going to be buried. It was around three o'clock in the morning now and he couldn't sleep, not that he was lying in bed trying to, anyways. Just as his favorite part of the movie was about to begin, he heard the doorbell ring. At first, he decided to ignore it, thinking no one had the right to disturb someone at three o'clock in the morning. But when they insisted, he paused the movie and went to check. Out of all the people that could've visited him in the middle of the night, he was definitely not expecting her. Not in a million years.
"Ziva? What are you doing here? How do you even know where I live?" He was bothered by her presence and the fact that there appeared to be nothing she didn't know about him. He felt completely exposed and vulnerable.
"Hey…. Can I come in? Please…" She'd been crying, so her eyes were still red and glassy. Tony felt sorry for her, so he let her in.
"Alright…. Everything ok?"
"You have a nice apartment. Do you play the piano?" She was avoiding the question.
"You're dodging my question, ZIva. Is everything alright?"
"Well, considering Ari died a few hours ago, the fact that I just drove through town after practically having been kept prisoner at the Israeli Embassy and not really knowing where to go or what to do, I'd say no, Tony. I don't think things are alright" She didn't want to break in front of him because she knew he was hurting, too.
"I'm sorry" He stayed quiet. Never really knew how to deal with emotional women. "Would you like a glass of wine?" he may not know how to deal with emotional women, but he knew wine couldn't hurt.
"Sure, thanks. Look, if I'm interrupting something or…" Her voice was breaking, so she had to stop talking. He noticed, but didn't say anything.
"No, you're not. I was just watching a movie I've already seen a million times. Don't worry." He was in pain, but he knew she had a lot on her plate, as well. He saw her kind of confused and overwhelmed and he started to get worried. He was not seeing the strong-willed, fierce woman he'd met just twenty hours ago; instead, he saw a vulnerable, exhausted and broken young lady, completely alone in an unfamiliar town. He handed her the glass of wine and sat opposite her on the couch. "Hey, sit down. Would you like to talk about it?"
She looked surprised at his offer. "I wouldn't even know where to start. I just needed to get away from everyone. Couldn't go back to Gibbs' and, since I don't know anyone else, I somehow ended up here. Sorry about that."
"No problem." Tony immediately knew that she was the keep-things-bottled-up-inside kind of person, so he knew he was the one who had to start a conversation. "She was one of my best friends, you know. Kate, I mean. She was a good person" Suddenly, Tony realized by the look in her eyes that Ziva felt guilty and responsible about her death and nothing he could say would make her feel any different.
"I know and I am sorry she had to die. It is not fair to you, the team or her family." She really was truly sorry and Tony could see that. "I know you do not want to hear this or won't even believe me, but Ari was a good person, too... Was. After what he did, I realize I should have seen this coming after some of the things he was being accused of back at Mossad. But he really was a nice guy. He was funny and sweet. Acted like a father all the time. He was a very overprotective person and never missed any of my school recitals. He was always on my side when my father blamed me for something... Just like you are sad for your best friend dying, it saddens me to know that I won't ever get to see my brother again. And I don't even know how to begin to deal with that, Tony" As she finished talking with an already broken voice, a single tear rolled down her cheek. That's when Tony saw the real Ziva: a sweet, loving and sensitive woman who had to put up walls to protect herself from being hurt.
What happened next caught them both off-guard. Tony sat next to her and pulled her into a hug. A hug both of them desperately needed. At first, she resisted a bit, but then gave in and got comfortable in his arms. Tony felt weird at first, but, after a while, it all seemed natural and just right. They both fit perfectly in each other's embrace.
After talking nonstop about life, death, friends and family, they realized how late, or rather early, it had gotten. Ziva arrived at Tony's at three in the morning. It was a little past five and she had to be at the airport at noon, so she had to get some sleep before that. She wanted to leave, but they'd been drinking, so it wasn't really safe for her to drive under the influence, especially with her driving skills.
"I should probably get going, Tony. Thank you for letting me in." She was feeling a little better now, but she was beyond exhausted at this point.
"Hey… You've drunk a little too much. You can't drive like that. You could get into an accident and injure someone or worse… You can crash in my bed and I'll sleep on the couch" He was just being nice. He had no idea what would happen within the next half-hour.
"I don't think that's—" She was interrupted by Tony, who grabbed her by the arm just as she had started to walk away from him. He wanted her to stay.
"Please… I don't want anything to happen to you"
With that, she nodded and went to his room to lie in his bed. Tony gave him one of his old OSU t-shirts for her to wear for the night and then left the room. He would take the couch and in the morning, she'd leave to Israel and he'd catch a plane to Indiana for Kate's funeral the day after that. They'd never see each other again. Or so they thought.
After lying in their respective beds for half an hour without being able to sleep, he went to where she was, to check on her. A wide-awake Ziva was shocked by Tony's "visit" and even more so when he sat next to her in bed. She just looked at him, without saying a word, not even trying to cover herself. They were both too tired to care about what the other thought and so they just lay there, next to each other and looking into the other's eyes. They couldn't look away, even though they both knew that what could potentially happen if they didn't look away would be a gigantic mistake on so many levels. But they couldn't help it.
"Can't sleep, huh? I have the same problem" At this, Ziva gave him a tiny smile, which Tony thought was the cutest thing he'd ever seen her wear. With a bit of hesitation, Tony tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear and got closer to her, all the while keeping his eyes locked on hers. Again, she didn't even flinch. She wanted, needed, this as much as he did. The closer to her he got the faster her heart beat. Until he finally kissed her, then it stopped completely. It caught her by surprise, but at the same time it didn't. The kiss, she thought, was soft and gentle, just like his touch. When he pulled back, she looked at him with such an innocent look that Tony's heart melted. And then she kissed him and he thought that was one of the best kisses he'd ever had. Before they knew it, clothes were on the floor and they were making love. The kind of love that was passionate and intense for all the wrong reasons. The kind of love that was the result of a tragic loss and deep sorrow. The kind of love that would change their lives forever.