"Well," Drax said at breakfast the following morning, which Groot was haphazardly preparing as Gamora. Her HUD connected to the 'net, providing a recipe for quiche he wanted to try.
"Well?" Rocket asked, as he skittered to the counter alongside Groot, pulling some fruit from the cold storage unit.
"I may as well teach you all some brawling skills. I think I'm going to avoid transforming myself for a little while yet, anyway."
"You sure, big guy?" Peter asked, clipping Drax on the back as he rounded to the juicer, swiping some blackfruit from Rocket's hoard.
"I could go another round as Groot, but, if you're willing to teach, I am willing to learn," chipped in Gamora, who was doing the sensible thing and pulling down plates and glasses for everyone. Without her, some of them- cough, Rocket, cough- would, and had, just eat from the table or floor.
"There's one more thing I want to try," Peter replied. "Or, actually, ask Groot to, because if it goes wrong, he won't be injured."
"What's that?" Rocket asked, ears perking and tail uncurling in curiosity. Peter kept a closer eye on Rocket in particular, his body language so much different than everyone elses's, even Groot's. "Testing out our kid theory? When I woke up this mornin', I got six holos from Yondu we could use for study."
"Well, that, sure, but what happens if we get hurt? Like really hurt. Break a bone or lose a limb injured."
"You're not chopping off Groot's arm, Quill," Rocket replied with a growl. "Don't care if it can grow back, that's just a dick move. Also I sure as hell ain't moppin' up blood."
"But what about a broken bone? Groot doesn't have bones."
"This is fine," Groot said after a moment. "I am going to need to know what pain feels like, anyway. Best do it here where we have access to medicine."
"Ya sure, big lug?" Rocket asked, incredulously.
"If I fight as any of you, I'd rather be prepared for the inevitable," Groot replied, pulling breakfast from the cooking unit, sniffing.
"Is this supposed to smell like this?" he added.
After eating and cleaning up, all four other Guardians sat or squatted around Groot, bandages, splints, pain medication, and whatever they thought might be needed from the med kit. Drax cut a wedge out of an unripe blackfruit, handing it to Groot.
"Put this in your mouth and bite hard," he instructed. "You will bite your tongue otherwise."
Gamora put a hand on Groot's shoulder. "I have pain dampeners. It will hurt, yes, but not as badly as if you were one of the others. If this is too much now, remember it will be worse if you are injured in another form."
Groot nodded, shoving the piece of stiff fruit into his mouth, biting hard and bracing himself, digging green nails into the sofa.
"Loosen one arm, please," Drax commanded, and Groot let his left arm go limp. Drax held it between his massive hands.
"I will count down from five."
"Wait," Rocket warned. "Take off your clothes first. Unless ya want to both ruin 'n be constricted by 'em. Ya may be shorter than Gams right now, but ya wider around than she is."
Groot nodded, and slipped off the loose Xandarian style dress, flat shoes, and undergarments, kicking them aside, before resettling into position, now more nervous than before.
"Ready?" Drax asked. Groot nodded
"Five, four…" Drax started, pulling sharply on Groot's wrist and elbow before ever hitting three.
Crack! Rocket shuddered in commiseration.
Groot was very glad for the piece of fruit in his mouth and the realization that even with Gamora's mods, he didn't like pain one bit. Drax quickly ran a finger along Groot's left arm and Groot winced.
"Yes, the bone is very much broken. Transform into yourself."
Groot did not need to be told twice, shrinking and thickening, skin hardening to bark. The pain dissipated quicker than expected, and Groot spit the blackfruit slice on the ground as he felt his own teeth replacing Gamora's.
"I am Groot," he proclaimed, three feet of wood and bark, flexing his left arm. Rocket, who had somehow curled himself into a tight ball, peeked out, breathing a sigh of relief.
"All good," Rocket translated. "Not even a loose vine or splinters in'im."
"I am Groot," Groot added, as he began to grow and thin, turning back to Gamora.
"He wants to see if the bone is still broken," Rocket helpfully supplied.
"Seems not," Groot added, as he finished, flexing his fingers and quickly putting clothes back on.
"There is no rush," Gamora said, noting Groot's haphazard speed in dressing. "You have nothing to be ashamed of."
Groot shrugged. "I'm cold."
"No wonder you don't wear shirts," Rocket rumbled as he stomped around in a pair of loose workout pants back outside the ship. "You're like a furnace."
"Your fur is quite thick and warm yourself, Rocket," Drax replied, sizing everyone up. He bounced his feet against the slightly spongy ground underneath. The planet and landing site Groot had picked for their practice the day before was also quite suitable for sparring. "And yet you still insist on covering your torso."
"Havin' a bare patch right where my fur should be thickest makes it loads colder," Rocket replied. "But, uh, yeah, the exposed metal skeleton might have somethin' t' do with that."
Drax laughed, and clipped Rocket on the back. Rocket took it as a gentle gesture, but, before he realized it, he was being flipped over Drax's shoulder and thrown flat on the ground.
"Holy fuck," Rocket wheezed. It didn't hurt that much, Rocket knew how to take a fall, but man, was it a surprise. Gamora and Peter had sparred with Drax before in the cargo hold, but Rocket was too small in his own form and so unused to fighting with martial arts that he'd never been on the receiving end of one of Drax's throws before. The Drax with a kerchief tied around his left wrist the color Rocket still couldn't quite get used to- red- Peter, then, snorted at Rocket shocked and on the ground, before Drax barreled towards him, flinging Peter aside like a rag doll. Brown wrist marker- Groot, then- charged Drax, and swiftly landed two jabs to Drax's torso and a right hook to his jaw.
"This works for us," boomed Groot, pointing at himself, then Peter and Gamora. "But Rocket does not know how to fight."
Drax turned around to hold out a hand to Rocket, still flat on his back in the spongy moss. "Have you ever thrown a punch before?" he asked, curiously.
"I've clawed people, if that counts?"
"Not quite. Here, let me show you a proper stance. Peter, Groot, and Gamora, why don't you go spar further down? There is a small field half a kilometer west of here that would be good."
The other three Draxes nodded, and Gamora flashed a small smile, flexing her muscles. "Shall we race?"
"Ffffff…" Rocket said, lying flat on his back in the sun after two hours of training with Drax. "I'm beat. Drax, couldja get me some of my clothes? Little me clothes? I kinda just wanna nap out here a bit."
"Certainly," Drax replied, stretching out. "I wonder why we get so exhausted even after we change back to ourselves, though, like yesterday. Gamora just shattered one of Peter's bones while they sparred, and he simply turned back into himself, then me, and kept going. But now everyone is…."
"Burnt out," Rocket finished. "Prolly mental exhaustion. I don't even wanna think 'a the physics that make this work. Conservation a' mass 'n energy alone means that there should be a supernova's worth 'a light every time, and a mini black hole. But there ain't. 'S like we get to say 'fuck ya' to the basic laws'a the universe every time we do this."
Drax patted Rocket on his bald head. "I am not complaining, my furry friend. We have become quite close over this shared ability. And, while I had been quite apprehensive of seeing others of my people… now I only see brothers. And it is good."
"Ya think we woulda been accepted as warriors like ya?" Rocket asked jokingly, stretching. Drax noticed Rocket was arching his back in a curve just like he did as a… whatever Rocket was.
Raccoon, Peter had said.
"I was no warrior back home," Drax said wistfully, as he began walking back towards the ship. "I was once a farmer."
Rocket lazily opened an eye. It was dark. He shot up instinctively, and felt and smelled the ash of a fire behind him.
"Lunch?" Peter asked, holding out a stick of flame-cooked tubers.
Rocket cracked his neck, blinked, and shook himself out, fluffing up his fur. "Huhwha?"
"You were only asleep for three hours," Drax- no, brown bandana tied at the wrist, so Groot- replied. "This planet has a very fast rotation. Days and nights only last about five hours each."
"Lunch under the stars, huh?" Rocket said, smacking his lips and wobbling up on his hind legs. He was still a bit weak.
Fuck it.
Rocket stretched out, and plodded over on all fours, hopping up on a dead log someone had overturned into a bench seat, squatting on his haunches, his tail lazily swishing behind. Groot reached over and gave Rocket a stick of charred avian meat, and a scratch behind the ears for good measure.
"Stars are the same, out in space, but their relation to one another as seen from a planet leads to very different patterns," Drax remarked, in between ripping vigorously at a leg of local fowl. "If this planet were inhabited, I wonder what stories they would make from the constellations?"
"Well, I see one that looks like Gamora," Peter remarked. "See? There's a gas cloud- I think that's the Hyvillia, but it's hard to tell- that's your hair. And that outline of stars there- that bright one for the head is Iona, Xandar's sun- that's you. And those four are your sword."
"I suppose that's all of us now," Gamora said, smiling.
"My people are no longer dead, because of this," Drax commented. "Nor are yours, Gamora."
"An' I have people now," beamed Rocket.
"You and Peter already have people," Groot joked, flicking an ear. "They're just stupid animals living on some backwater no-fly zone."
"Hey, I resemble that remark," Peter quipped, as he swallowed a roasted bird heart.
"Speaking of," Groot added, " want to see what Rocket looked like as a kid?"
"I'm going to go out on a limb here and say 'fluffy and adorable'," Peter replied, shaking his now-empty skewer at Groot.
Groot beamed, and began shrinking, not even bothering to take off his clothes as he was becoming so small. Quickly, the kerchief slid onto the mossy ground as his arms went from Drax's massive musculature to tiny- even tinier than Rocket tiny- arms, slowly shrinking out of view. Eventually, Groot emerged from the tent of fabric that was his pants, completely covered in thick, soft fur, not a metal implant or strut in sight. Groot chirped.
He was a good head and a half shorter than Rocket, and some of the changes were more subtle. He was fatter, his front paws were shorter, with far more pronounced claws, and his legs tucked under on all fours in a slightly different way than Rocket's did. He stood up and walked flat footed on his back legs like Rocket, but the steps were weak and unsteady.
"I'm not s'posed to be able to walk on two for long periods," Rocket explained, running a paw through the fuzz on Groot's back. "I could, 'before', but it weren't ideal. That's why I have this," he added, pointing to the strut on his collarbone. Everyone knew from experience that he had another at his hips.
Groot squeaked, returned to all fours, and waddled to Drax, jumping up and settling in his lap.
"Think he wants to be petted," Rocket said, snorting.
Groot made a chittering noise and headbutted one of Drax's massive hands, demanding head scratches.
"This form is not in the bio-database, yes?"
"Yeah, they did a ton 'a work on me. Gene therapy too, look at 'is paws 'gainst mine. I had an opposable thumb 'fore, but not nearly the capacity for fine motor skill."
"Useful for covert operations then," Gamora interjected, scooting closer to Drax to look more closely at Groot. "I, unfortunately, possess no records of me as a child, so, while it may have been useful, does us no good."
Drax simply picked up Groot, draping him from a shoulder down his front. Groot's tail swished lazily against a pectoral, content, as Drax cradled him to his chest in one arm and made long sweeps from Groot's head to mid-back with the other.
"There is something to be said about stress relief as well," Drax remarked.
"Which is true, 'cause we are going to need it," Peter responded, sliding next to Drax on the other side, scratching Groot behind an ear.
"What, ya talkin' about the bounty that's on us?" Rocket said, looking at the three huddled around Groot and not the slightest bit jealous at the petting and attention- certainly not enough to crawl up on Drax's free knee and bother Gamora for scratches. Which he was absolutely not planning on doing as he got up off his log and moved over to the rest of the group.
"Why would we have a bounty? We have done nothing illegal in the months since Xandar. If nothing, we have done a mixture of supply and cargo drops mixed with deposing of criminals ON the bounty list," interjected Gamora, who began ruffling Rocket's fur absentmindedly. "Nova would excise it from the intergalactic database even if an enemy of one of ours listed it so."
"Unofficial," Rocket replied, lifting his head up just so. It was so they could hear him, dammmit, not so Gamora could have easier access to his chin. "Hardline Kree have put a total of what, 330,000 on everyone but Groot? They think he's dead, so they don't care. Groot told me this mornin'."
"Ah," Drax said.
"Thinking about having Yondu turn some of us in, he can keep the off-the-books bounty for the trouble and probable- very probable- backup, and we get the real, official bounties from Nova. Taking in even one of the ringleaders will set us up for quite a while. I did some research on them," Peter replied.
"So the bounty is for us alive, then?" Gamora asked, voice raised and interested.
"Yeah."
"They will want to execute or, more likely, given our status, torture us in public as a display of power."
"Yeah."
"Like proddin' me with an EMP until I go animal for good," Rocket interjected, shuddering. "Effing hate EMPs."
"And yet, Groot here is you before modification and totally cognizant," Gamora replied, beginning to understand.
"So if someone else swapped with me and got blasted…"
Groot nodded vigorously, growing a few inches as struts and metal parts began to stick out of his skin, a large patch of fur burning away on his back.
"They would be like I just was, Rocket." Groot replied, now with Rocket's voice. "Not lobotomized as you would be. We can trade places based upon what sort of public punishment they would likely give each of the real us."
"Not all. Groot has no bounty, no point turning him in. And Drax's is the lowest, much lower than anyone else's, so we hang two of us back," Peter interjected.
"I am not sure whether I should be flattered or insulted, Drax cut in.
"Way I see it, Yondu gives them a Peter, a Gamora, and a Rocket. Probably Drax, Groot, and Gamora in some combination, since you three are the best on your own if things go sour."
"Which they will, no doubt," Rocket huffed. "But Pete's right. I'm the best as me, but can't do too much damage without parts to build a weapon. Can't aim quite right as Gams, and still can't really brawl as Drax. Could be Groot and just flail 'round, but, yeah. Not ideal."
"Rocket and I can stay behind, and do… something. I have to see what the layout of the place you'd probably end up in, or the drop point. But I'm going to assume some hacking will be in order. Or, at least, some sleight of hand to acquire keys and slip soporifics to guards."
"Hey, Pete?" Rocket asked, half lost in thought realizing he couldn't put himself in the ine of fire in any sensible capacity. "I know ya mentioned having to be Yondu's kid before, and ya crazy good at disguises. How good are ya with makeup and prosthetics?"
"Very," Peter replied. "Until Xandar got smart with bioscans, I usually did pickpocketing as a Krylonian or Centurian. But there's no way that'll fly most places now. Unless you're talking somewhere poor or remote…"
"Yeah, but they don't scan kids. Child laws prevent for safety reasons- summat about preventing abusers from findin' kids or summat, and the Kree follow it too- most Kree aren't asshats like the Ronan supporters. Can you make you, well me-you as a kid, a little Kree?" Rocket scrunched his face, as he considered what he could do from the outside.
"Easier than a Centurian," Peter replied, grinning, mental gears turning at Rocket's suggestion. "And I have an angle to get you inside, too. Yondu's got a few Kree on his crew, and we can just have him want to confirm 'our' deaths with an observer and his kid. Show the son what it means to disobey Kree cultural law or something."
"If I know one thing about hardline idealists," Gamora said, seething anger bubbling underneath her words, "it is that they appreciate someone indoctrinated young. I doubt our buyers-to-be will reject such a request." She coughed once, regaining her composure after she realized she'd accidentally yanked Rocket's right ear in frustration.
"Shall we call upon Yondu, then?" Drax asked. "We still need some more information from him."
"Let's finish our food first," Groot grunted, sliding out of Drax's grasp, yanking up a grilled vegetable skewer from the rack over the fire.
"Cannibal," Drax commented.
Four sets of eyes turned towards Drax, blinking in awe.
"What, was that too morbid?" he asked innocently.
"Drax, man," Peter said, mouth agape. "You just made a joke."