T - T

The following three weeks ran very smoothly. I spent every Tuesday and Thursday in the youth center, painting the walls black to better "relate to the youth," decorating, and getting to know the volunteers I would work with. We arranged the camping trip, which was coming up the following month. The youth group was very excited when I told them the plans for it.

The rest of my workweek was spent in the church office, working closely with Pastor Cullen. We were becoming fast friends, and I had to admit that it was nice to have someone I could both look up to and find a common interest with.

Edward's wife, Tanya, was the leader of the Women's Ministries at the church. She sang with the choir every Sunday, and was the epitome of propriety—everything a pastor's wife should be. Sister Cullen had long, strawberry-blonde hair and always dressed perfectly.

Sister Cullen's only fault was that she rarely spoke to me, usually simply looking down her nose at me whenever I was around the pastor. I was unsure why she disliked me, but Edward didn't seem to notice, so I never said anything about it.

I had certainly developed a crush on the man. He was very handsome, much more so than Jacob, and extremely smart. In our time together, he taught me lessons from the Bible that I had never realized were in there. Edward shared things with me that he said God only allowed certain people to know. I was allowed into the exclusive group because I had put my trust in Pastor Cullen.

When we studied the Bible together, I would often catch Edward staring at me with what can only be described as...longing. Our time together was enlightening and enjoyable. I never realized men could behave so friendly with women; it proved wrong something I had always believed to be sinful—men and women associating outside of courtship.

Jake had come calling as soon as I settled back into my parent's home. Of course, he asked Daddy's permission, which was happily given. Though we had very little in common, Jacob was a man of God. Daddy said Jake had a good head on his shoulders and he always voted pro-life; what more was I to ask for? What more could a father want for his daughter? I was well on my way to becoming the perfect wife I was destined to be.

Jacob had yet to hold my hand during our courting. Of course, kissing was an absolute "no-no" until the day of the wedding. So, we stuck to a smile whenever we said hello or goodbye. But suddenly things I never thought about, like kissing and touching, were on my mind. I wasn't sure why I had dedicated so much time to thinking of them, but I knew it was a sin to have such lustful thoughts in the forefront of my mind.

"Are you ready for lunch, Bella?" Edward asked me, interrupting my musings over my situation with Jake. We had regular lunch meetings every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. At these meetings, we would discuss the week, see how things were coming along with the youth center, and work out plans for the youth camping trip. The trip was coming up in just over a month, and I still had so much to plan.

When we got to the parsonage—our typical lunch meeting spot, thanks to Sister Cullen being away on those days—I went straight for the kitchen to prepare our meal. I'd made myself at home there, as Pastor Cullen had instructed me to do. I needed to find some way to bring up my concerns about Jacob to him. We were always taught to take absolutely anything to our pastor. These men were filled with the Holy Spirit, and that is just the place we were meant to go when we needed answers.

"Mmmm." His voice came from behind me. "Whatever are you cooking, Isabella?"

I spun around and smiled widely. "Fried pork chops. I hope you're hungry."

The crooked grin reappeared on his face. I often thought of it as my grin; I'd only ever seen it when it was pointed directly at me. "What is it with you Southern girls? Are you trying to fatten me up?"

Laughing, I stuck out my tongue and tossed a potato chunk his way. He easily dodged it, but it was on!

Edward grabbed a handful of flour and tossed it at me. It dusted my clothes and hair, white streaks marking my cheeks. I laughed as I hadn't in years, so full of joy and peace. Around the room we ran, chasing each other with cooking ingredients.

Halfway around the kitchen island with me hot on his tail, Edward came to a sudden halt and spun around. I was effectively trapped between his body and the refrigerator. The smile fell from my lips and I took a deep breath, swallowing thickly. His hand slowly came up to my face, brushing a speck of flour from my cheek—lingering.

"Do you believe in soul mates, Isabella?" Edward asked me softly. I nodded numbly, my eyes dancing between his and the beautiful, soft lips directly in front of me. "The Lord reveals these things in his own time." He whispered the words, seemingly afraid to scare me off.

I nodded again. I'd always been told these things; I'd waited for the one my entire life.

Suddenly his lips were on mine. It was my very first kiss, and what a kiss it was! His hands fisted themselves in my hair, yanking and tugging at it until my head fell back against the stainless steel with a thud. Edward's lips moved down my jaw to my neck. He licked, sucked, and nibbled at the tender flesh.

This was beyond anything I'd ever imagined. None of the ladies from the purity classes had ever said how good this would feel. And I certainly didn't feel disgusted when his mouth moved back up to my lips and his tongue slipped into my mouth.

I didn't even think of that nasty cup from my time in youth group—the one they had us line up behind and spit into. They had dared us to drink from it, signifying what it would be like if we kissed someone who'd already given away that special gift.

I wouldn't have thought of it at all, if it hadn't been for the sound of the doorbell. We tore our mouths from each other. Edward flew backward, putting as much distance between us as possible. I put my hand to my mouth as he brushed off his shirt and left the room. I barely heard the muted conversation he was having with whoever was at the door. Instead, my mind was filled with thoughts of the terrible thing I had just done.

Glancing around the room, I noticed pictures of Pastor Cullen and his wife. She was the perfect pastor's wife, and I had just led her husband astray!

I rushed to the back door of the house, quietly opening it and slipping outside. Scurrying over the short fence to my parent's yard, I snuck inside. Mother wasn't home at that moment; it was Wednesday, so she was out getting her nails done. I climbed the stairs to my room and threw myself onto the bed, tears streaming freely down my face.

What have I done?

A quiet knock sounded from my door and I bolted upright.

"Yes?" I asked, timidly.

The door squeaked open and Pastor Cullen's head appeared. "Are you okay, Bella?" he asked softly, stepping into my room and closing the door behind him.

Shaking my head, I buried my red, blotchy face in my hands. Suddenly on his knees before me, Edward tugged my hands away from my face.

"Please don't cry, honey," he whispered, smoothing my hair down my back and brushing tears from my cheeks. It was such an intimate gesture. I pulled back. The sting of rejection was evident in his eyes; it only served to confuse me further.

Edward reached for my old Bible from my bedside table. He fanned through it until he came to the passage he sought.

"Read this aloud, Isabella," he told me, pointing to an exact verse.

I sniffed and brushed more fallen tears from my face. "'Tr—trust in the Lord w—with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.'"

He took the book from me and fanned through until he got to the New Testament. Again, he pointed to a verse. "Read from here," Edward said.

"'...A man is the image and glory of God, but the woman is the glory of the man.'" I looked up at him, confused and seeking.

Edward closed the Bible and replaced it beside the bed. "Isabella," he said to me, "we've had many discussions on the topic of soul mates and marriage. I have been on my knees, praying about this very topic—speaking with God. The Almighty has heard my cries and has answered me, Bella."

I blinked rapidly, unsure of where this was going. Surely, I was about to be fired from the church and exiled! I couldn't imagine another route for this situation to take.

"Tanya and I met in Bible School." My head dropped at the mention of his wife. I was such a terrible person. Even after I asked for forgiveness for this terrible sin, there was no way for me to go a day without thinking of that kiss—continually sinning. Therefore, I was surely destined to burn in Hell.

"She was the daughter of a Southern Baptist minister, and my father was on the General Council for the Assemblies of God. After we went on our first group date, our parents pushed us together. We were 'meant to be,' they all told me, but I had my reasons to doubt it. Tanya has always been a polite woman, submissive and willing to serve, but she and I don't have anything to talk about. She doesn't know me like you do."

A sob tore from my chest. He told the truth; I had gotten to know him well over the last few weeks. Edward was very open with me. We had both come to rely on each other for support and understanding.

Edward leapt to his feet and grabbed my arms, pulling me to stand before him. His palm cupped my cheek, forcing me to meet his gaze. "But, Bella," he pleaded with me, "she and I are not soul mates. I've never loved her as a husband should love his wife. I cannot love her the way the Bible instructs. And she doesn't love me that way either, Isabella."

My tears dried instantly. What? Edward slid his hand from my cheek and down my neck, until it rested on over my heart.

"I knew you were my soul mate, Bella, from the moment I looked at you."

Suddenly, our lips were attacking each other again. His hands were everywhere, touching all the places I'd always been told were inappropriate. If they were so terrible then why did they send such pleasure through me?

I let him lead.

He whispered my name, over and over, as he kissed my face and neck.

T - T