p class="MsoNormal"span lang="EN-US"The days went by in a blur and then became unbearable. br / He was so used to being on his own that he couldn't handle being dependent on someone. Even if it was / Red knew that he was a pain in the ass for all of them – Kate, Dembe and especially Lizzie. He pushed her away, he was painfully aware of it, but couldn't change anything about it. Though she had spent the past three nights beside him, his mind was still trying to catch up on the change in their relationship. br / Or whatever it was they had gotten themselves into. br / With the reduction of his pain medication, the fogginess of his mind went by and reality showed it´s cruel face. They couldn't get involved with each other. It was too dangerous and he needed her to understand that. But it seemed that it was far too late for / Liz made a point not leave his side. br / He knew that she had made some deal with Harold but he still had to find out what that deal had been about. Dembe wouldn't tell him and Kaplan just grunted unintelligibly words when he asked about it. Lizzie kept him out of the loop and he hated it. br / Her very own way to punish him for pushing her away so vehemently. br / Red knew that he couldn't keep that going on for any longer. His body and mind craved her affection and touch. He wanted to give into her so badly that he´d locked himself inside the bathroom the other night to resist the temptation. br / And when he thought he´d finally succeeded he woke up to her sleeping form next to him in the morning. br / It was a lost game really. Because she emknew/em. She knew that he wanted her because he wouldn't reject her kisses or her touches. And it was that small string she was holding onto. br / Mr. Kaplan was yet again with him to change the dressing and examine the wound. But this time Lizzie was still in his room. She sat on a recliner by the windows reading a book he had recommended. Red knew she didn't really liked it at all but respected that she still wanted to finish it. br / "Dearie, would you mind to leave us alone for a moment?" br / Mr. Kaplan expectantly held the door open for her and Lizzie put the book aside. br / "Yes, I would." br / The older woman remained silent, but her face was open like a book, at least to him. Oh she wasn't happy about Lizzies stubborn reply. br / "Raymond-" br / "She can stay." br / Kate's eyes immediately went to him and her eyebrows rose. No, she didn't expect / "Are you sure?" br / He nodded and sat up, his legs dangling from the bed. If she hadn't thought but running from him and hating him, she most likely will do so in a few minutes, he thought and began to unbutton his pajama / He wasn't too modest when it came to nudity, but he was painfully aware of his scared upper-body. There had been women in the past who were disgusted by the expense of the scaring, especially his back. But to be rejected by Lizzie was a whole different / It was the connection she never should have known about and was, when he pulled the shirt from his shoulders, directly confronted with. br / Kaplan was already beside him and removed the dressing, while Lizzie was still behind them. He couldn't sense her moving and Kaplan's poking was distracting / "It definitely looks better" she praised and began to dress the wound again. "If you had taken such care before, there would be less scars, sweetie." He barely registered her words. Lizzies' stillness was making him nervous. He felt the twitch under his eye, the need to turn around and look at her. But he feared what he would see / When Kaplan was finished, she looked up at him and then besides him to where he assumed Lizzie was situated. She leaned forward, kissed his cheek and bid them both goodbye. br / For a very long time neither of them moved. She was still with him but he wasn't sure whether it was a good sign or / He was putting his shirt back on when Lizzie's voice stopped / "Don't"br / His heart was pounding so hard when he felt the bed dip. She pulled the shirt back down and in the next second she was touching his back. It had been such a long time that someone had touched him with such tenderness and care. Especially his back. He´d nearly forgotten what it felt like. The sweet shudder that ran down his spine, the small puffs that tingled over his neck. br / What had he done to earn that woman's trust and comfort? br / When the movements of her hands had slowed down, she closed her arms around his shoulders while she pressed her cheek against / "Thank you" Liz whispered and tightened his arms. br / For the very first time she didn't ran him over with questions and just accepted the obvious. But he knew that she would want to know about it / "Thank you for saving me." br / He remembered the night in the hospital. The life she could have had without him. br / But he realized that if he hadn't entered her life, Lizzie would have been dead a long time ago. And maybe that made it right again. /span/p