Disclaimer: MGS isn't mine
I have to study for finals, so I decided to draw the FOX logo on my external HDD.
I have to study for finals, so I decided to restart MGS3. Again.
I totally suck at drawing. That's why there's no cover picture for this fic. The only thing I can represent properly is the triforce...So unless I decide to write a MGS x LoZ crossover, I can't use it.
As always, you may excuse my Engrish.
Shadow Moses Island, Toilets, 2005
The tiled walls had since long been covered with various human fluids. Standing out among the smelly stains and written in red paint, « Liquid is gay » was crossing the door. The last bit of toilet paper was long gone, only to be replaced by a pile of cheap porn mags. This change was a success, there is nothing more user-friendly than a porn magazine since you just have to tear off a sheet when you need it. Sat gloriously on his favorite porcelain throne, Johnny Sasaki was meditating over his stomach problems, reading his future toilet paper, when he heard a voice coming from the other side of the wall.
-I'd give my life ! Not for honor, but for youuuu !
Johnny shrugged his shoulders and just ignored it, trying to concentrate on his task. Today was his lucky day : one page -covered in women adopting debatable positions- was left. Johnny surprised himself smiling. However, another sound caused his smirk to waver.
-I'm still in a dreaaamm ! Snake Eateeer !
-Kaz ! shouted a deeper voice.
Sasaki dropped his paper/porn to plunge a finger in each ear. The thin sheet landed near a suspicious looking puddle. An unidentified substance started to soak the paper. A dismayed Johnny silently contemplated his last hope being reduced to the state of papier-mâché.
-I can even interpret the japanese version ! exclaimed the first voice.
Johnny banged his head against the wall and only managed to hurt himself.
-Watashi wa subete hageeeeeru !
Noticing about a square centimeter of real triple-layer peach-scented toilet paper sticking for some mysterious reason out of one of his boots, Sasaki shredded it off, rolled it and put in in his ears conduits.
-Sore wa nozomiiii ! Snake Eateeer !
-Kaaaz ! hurled the second voice.
When Johnny felt tears filling at the corner of his eyes, he couldn't determine if the cause was his guts or the three prisoners in the adjoining cell. He suddenly raised his head, filled with hope. The deafening noise had stopped !
-When heavens diviiide ! I will see the choices within my haaaands !
Johnny lowered his head and realized the only paper left was the small amount stuck in his ears. This devastating awareness largely justified the rumble sound the solider unwillingly let out, caught by someone passing by at this exact moment. And Shadow Moses' legendary toilets' wolf was born.
Shadow Moses Island, Torture Room, 2005
The man tied up his long silver hair using a piece of whatever was that string on his desk. He looked out over the recently renovated room. He was particularly proud of the Colt printed wallpaper he chose. Revolver Ocelot tenderly passed his index on one of the drew guns, appreciating the detail of the trigger. Someone was singing in one of the cells on the other side of the corridor. « Minato no Yoko Yokohama Yokosuka ! » heard the gunslinger. Even the « SNAKE KICK » shouted by a prisoner near the room, followed by an exclamation of pain and the dull sound of a body crashing against the floor, didn't trouble his contemplation. Almost regretful, Ocelot turned back from the wall and gave a quick look to the heteroclit equipment confiscated from some prisoners by his hooded men. Some raw fishes, cigars, a knife, two guns and a yellow scarf were now cluttering the table. Two hooded guards entered the room at the exact moment Ocelot was tying the scarf around his head.
-Fear me, I'm Big Boss ! he said in a devilish voice, without noticing them.
The two soldiers looked at each others, taken aback.
-Hum hum, coughed one of them, embarrassed.
Ocelot quickly removed the yellow scarf from his forehead and hid it behind his back, printing a neutral expression on his face.
-What do you have to announce ? he said casually in the most natural way possible.
-Would you like to see the prisoners ?
The gunslinger's confused look was accentuated by the wild twitching of his eyebrows. He put on an assured face before asking :
-You mean the drunken Russians ?
One of the guards nonchalantly put his hands into his pockets and just ended up looking stupid since there weren't any in his uniform. The other tilted his helmet down to hide his face, becoming an inspiration for Valve®. Ocelot sacrificed his pride and asked :
-Who are you talking about ?
His men organized a quick draw of straws. The unlucky one, who picked the shortest, made his tearful goodbyes to his colleague and stepped towards his fate, with a last thought for his ca...He was interrupted -in his own thoughts- by Ocelot :
-I'm not going to harm you, you can speak freely, said the gunslinger in a tone presuming all but non-violence.
His interlocutor was so relaxed that he started to shake.
-I-I was talking about the three int-intruders we found in the remaining of the ex-ex-explosives storage building and...PLEASE DON'T KILL ME !
Revolver Ocelot shrugged his shoulders.
-I wasn't even thinking about it before you mentioned it.
A Colt in each hand, the gunslinger remembered the unfortunate incense stick he lit with a flamethrower earlier. Visibly too close from the explosives building. Three men had then been found among the rubble. Two stuck under the concrete while the third one was contemplating the scene without helping. The gunslinger waved his right hand to catch his hooded men's attention back.
-Bring the prisoners to me at once. And please take more than two guards to do so.
They left. A few minutes later, an entire squad knocked at the door. A hooded guard opened the battant a little and put his head round it, his comrades scrambling behind him to enter first.
-We brought them.
-When I said to take more than two guards, I didn't mean our entire forces. Anyways, let them in, one by one.
A hooded man violently pushed someone in the room. The prisoner staggered a little then managed to keep his balance and raised his head, allowing Ocelot to detail his facial characteristics. He never encountered him before, however the bandanna and the cold blue eyes reminded him of someone. He indicated Solid Snake to step forward and let enter the second prisoner. The silver haired man pensively rubbed his chin, examining the sunglasses facing him. He was almost sure he had already seen those mirror surfaces somewhere. Ocelot shook his head and just ignored it, addressing a sign to the guard so he let the last one in. That time, the gunslinger rubbed his eyes. His brow ticked as his eyes trailed over the other's face. His gaze briefly stopped on the blue left eye, the eye-patch before trailing down the black sneaking suit.
-Nice Big Boss cosplay, admitted Ocelot after a few minutes
-Thanks Oc...mister
Ocelot, fascinated, was examining Naked Snake from all the angles.
-What is a cosplayer of your scale doing in the middle of nowhere ?
Since he had no idea about what a cosplayer was, Big Boss improvised, as always, and recycled a cover he used a few months ago.
-I'm and ornithologist. I came here for birdwatching.
Trying to feed the conversation, Ocelot answered :
-I heard a lot about the Alaskan tropical birds.
-Do you know the stunning « urhdumb » ?
The gunslinger fervently shook his head back and forth :
-That's my favorite one !
Kazuhira lowered his head to hide his growing smile. Useless precaution, Ocelot couldn't notice him, his attention still monopolized by Snake.
-Your bandanna seems so authentic ! continued the gunslinger. Mind if I borrow it for a moment ?
Before he could even protest, Big Boss found himself divested from the precious bandanna he teared off from his mentor. When admiring himself in his Colt-shaped mirror wearing the piece of cloth, Ocelot remarked the disappearance of the other prisoner's own bandanna. Preoccupied, he gave back the headband to Big Boss and approached Solid Snake. Ocelot frowned. The bandanna was still here. He would have sworn it had just vanished a while ago.
Thoughtful, the gunslinger fixed Solid Snake's forehead before asking :
-Where did you get that bandanna ?
The concerned shrugged his shoulders.
-From Big Boss, if I remember well.
Ocelot placed his nose at a few centimeters from the blue eyed soldier's one, making him squint.
-How did you get to do such a thing ?
Solid Snake winced : his doppelganger just crushed his foot. He gave a hurt look to Big Boss, who shook his head.
-He let it fall in the street, so I just took it, answered Snake, without noticing Big Boss' facepalm in the background.
Ocelot observed him suspiciously. Both Snake were holding their breath, trying to look as innocent as possible. The gunslinger finally lost interest in them to turn toward Kazuhira Miller. He furrowed a brow.
-Where did you get that hematom on your cheek, sunglasses ?
Kaz raised an eyebrow.
-From Big Boss.
-Decidedly, everyone gets things from Big Boss these days. How did such a thing happen ?
Kazuhira's foot was suddenly crushed. He turned his head to see his bearded comrade scowling in his general direction.
-That was in the street, affirmed Miller, accompanied by another Big Boss' facepalm in the background.
Revolver Ocelot brusquely turned towards Naked Snake, slapping his own face with his long hair.
-You, the cosplayer, why is your forehead all red ? Don't tell me it has something to do with Big Boss, has it ?
-It becomes like this when I take the bandanna off for a little too long.
The gunslinger, satisfied, sat behind his desk, his left hand resting on the wood and the right one playing with a Colt. He accidentally pressed the trigger. Small bits of concrete fell from the ceiling.
-Anything to say before we start ?
Kazuhira Miller took the floor, making Big Boss realize that their cover, already quite cracked, would be shattered in a few seconds. Kaz adopted his most serious look and kneeled, the hooded guard still holding his arms behind his back choosing to be dragged down behind him.
-Be my kaishaku.
-Your what ?
-I shall commit seppuku. Be my kaishaku. And find me some white clothes for the ceremony.
Big Boss sighed.
-He just wants to disembowel himself, he explained. Like approximatively three times a day. You'll get used to it.
His lack of interest for the situation fascinated Ocelot. The short-haired man's voice brought him back to reality.
-I think this guy might be Cyclops. That's why he can't take his sunglasses off.
-What man ? I only see a pair of Aviator, mumbled Naked Snake in response, so his words weren't caught by their jailer. The latter threw his revolvers in the air to clap his hands together, but omit to catch them back.
-So, silly stuff for idle moments, let's begin, joyfully announced the gunslinger from under his desk, searching for his guns.
-You see, this torture room was designed to electrocute only one person at a time, he added before hitting his head, forgetting the table above him.
-You electrocute one of them while I smother the two left, proposed someone else in a loud voice to cover Ocelot's curses.
A gray-haired man, wearing an armor with two tentacle-like protuberances attached to his shoulders had just entered the room under the hooded guards noses.
-Hi brother ! Hi father ! he said to the flabbergasted prisoners.
Revolver Ocelot wasn't as happy to see him.
-May I ask what you're doing here ? he asked, menacingly pointing his twin revolvers in the wrong direction.
The armored man pensively shook his pseudopodia, sending the table content to the floor at the same time.
-Crap, he said after a moment. Wrong game. See you in four years, Ocelot, he casually dropped before leaving, his tentacles joyfully bouncing behind him. Only Solid Snake was fast enough to prevent a pseudopodium from slapping him in the face.
Ocelot picked up his belongings dispersed on the floor.
Big Boss rubbed his painful nose.
Kaz searched for his sunglasses.
The silver-haired gunslinger sat behind his desk, a revolver in each hand, crossing his legs on the table. The hooded guards in his range prudently moved away.
-I can't torture you properly, so I shall try another method.
Solid Snake, relieved, brought back a smile on his face. Big Boss and Kazuhira glanced at each others, perplex.
-So, who do I shoot first ?
Snake's lips immediately turned down. He kept his mouth shut, his glare simmering down to something utterly contemplative. His double just adopted his favorite « oh, not again » expression. A few minutes later, the three prisoners were still static, waiting for something dreadful to happen. Revolver Ocelot wasn't moving an inch either, looking strangely sheepish.
-My spurs are stuck in the table.
Shadow Moses Island, Otacon's Lab (or rather behind the door), 2005
Too lazy to travel according to the book/game, Raiden had followed Otacon through the base without even bothering to walk silently. The two accomplices had bluntly stridden the corridors, hands slipped in his pockets for Otacon and casually crossed behind his neck for Raiden who didn't gain pockets since chapter 2, even if he had more than four months to do so. He had to knock out the first guard they encountered to steal his uniform.
- « ! » Is somebody there ?
-Guess not ! said an unknown voice loud enough to be heard by anyone in a ten meters range. What the guard mistook for a blond girl landed on his back to stole his pants, his hood, his consciousness and his self-love in a single strike. Raiden smoothly put the black hood on. After a few seconds, he shook his head from right to left.
-I can't see anything.
-It's back to front, baka, enunciated Emmerich without deigning to throw him more than a two-seconds gaze.
-Hum.
The second guard they encountered listlessly glared at someone wearing the same uniform as his, agreemented by what seemed to be a japanese sword, accompanied by a man in possession of an anorak and round shaped (or hexagonal shaped, we're on PS1) glasses. The heteroclit team formed by an engineer and a swordsman disguised as a woman disguised as a guard finally reached the lab.
Raiden removed his hood (still back to front) to give a quick look through the aperture piercing the door.
-I think it's all clear, he affirmed to Otacon.
Raiden raised his right arm, his hand passing behind his back to reach the grip of his sword. The cold steel slowly slid against the sheath without producing a sound. The end of the blade swept in an arc as his arm went back to his side.
Otacon's eyes went sparkling as he nearly started drooling.
-That was so cool. That's how you unsheathe a nihonto. Can you do it again ?
Ignoring him, Raiden was ready to turn the handle, his hand already brushing against the cold metal, when he heard a voice coming from the inside of the laboratory. « Hurt me more ! ». The swordsman twisted his neck to see the left side of the room through the glass. Whatever was in here stayed out of his range of sight. Keeping his left palm on the handle, Raiden half turned towards Hal.
-Otacon, did you leave one of your masochists animes playing ?
-I watch all my animes in OV ! protested the engineer, offended.
The latter was ready to go sulking in a corner but was interrupted by another voice coming from the inside.
-Sorry, I was just passing by. I'm leaving now.
Raiden and Otacon pressed their ear against the door, willing to at least follow what was going on by the sound since they couldn't see it. Unfortunately, they had this idea at the exact same moment and ended up colliding. The katana escaped Raiden's palm to be caught by an interested Otacon before it hit the floor. After snatching off his blade from the engineer, nearly taking a few fingers in the process, the swordsman hammered his weapon deep in the ground to Otacon's great displeasure and went back against the door.
-I know you want to slap me with those filthy tentacles ! said the first intruder.
-Otacon, you're really sure it's not one of your animes ? whispered Raiden, rubbing his forehead.
-Where is the exit ? almost cried the second one.
Emmerich gave an anxious look to Raiden. The only exit was the door they were leaned against. Footsteps resonated on the other side of the thin wooden plank.
-Mieru ! exclaimed Otacon, picking through the window.
Raiden bluntly pushed him away to press his nose against the glass panel. Two men, visibly coming directly from a sci-fi movie, were facing each others. One of them was wearing a blue and orange body armor, his face hidden with a helmet, pierced by an unique red...eye ? He was holding a high-frequency blade.
-How can you tell ? It's just a regular katana to me, whispered Otacon.
-Are you reading my thoughts ?
-You're talking out loud, Shiroyasha.
Not even surprised by his weird new sobriquet -which was at least slightly better than « Blondie »-, Raiden went back to the intruders.
The second one, more massive, also wearing an armor, was characterized by the two pseudopodia hanging to his shoulders. Otacon's head appeared next to Raiden's.
-That's like in one of my japanese animes !
An applauding sound resonated around them, as confetti fell from the ceiling and an invisible entity said "Congratulations, you placed the Otacon's catchphrase !"
-What are a portal turret and Mr Hentai doing in here, Otacon ? asked Raiden, imperturbable, trying to wipe out the confetti from his hair.
-What are Gray Fox and Solidus Snake doing in here is the real question, murmured Emmerich, addressing to no one in particular, covered in confetti.
Raiden, who had returned to the door, didn't hear him. He should have identified the two characters in the room by their voices only.
-I know these guys. I encounte…
He was interrupted by a crash sound coming from the inside. Without more thoughts, he teared his blade off the ground and burst into the room, living a confetti trace behind him, ignoring Otacon's « Don't slice doors like that ! ». The lab was empty. The swordsman heard discreet cracking sounds coming from under his feet and lowered his sight. Small bits of concrete were strewn about the floor. Searching for the source of the debris, Raiden followed the concrete fragments until his forehead encountered a wall. He took too many steps backwards and bumped into Otacon. The swordsman silently contemplated the Solidus-shaped hole in the wall. Hal Emmerich strode over the remains of the wall.
-Forget what I just said about the door, you're way more delicate than them.
Another crash sound on his left made Raiden jump. "What a crappy isolation" shouted someone out of their range of sight. Otacon put his head round the burst wall.
-Are they going to cross the whole building like the Juggernaut ? Because it's the second floor basement here, they can't go outside like that.
Raiden didn't respond, starring at the back of the engineer's head.
-You've always had brown hair ?
Otacon hit his head against the edge of the hole.
-I have brown hair ? Uh….of course it was always like this.
Shadow Moses Island, Prison Cells, 2005
Kazuhira Miller, pacing nervously around the cell, stopped abruptly, making Solid Snake, who was following him for some obscure reason, bump into him. Big Boss, sat on a turned bucket, tranquilly gazed at them, his face resting on his palms. The blond man turned towards him to express all his justified anger.
-They took my scarf !
Big Boss didn't move an inch.
-I know, Kaz.
-I can pass on the fact I have no idea what I am doing here but they didn't have to take my scarf ! I feel naked without it !
-It's because you are naked, Kaz, explained Big Boss like he was confronted to this kind of situation twice a day.
-They didn't have to take my clothes either !
-Next time you'll avoid to piss off your jailer, commented Snake in an equal tone.
A sound above his head caught his attention.
-And you, what are you doing to the ceiling ? he asked, without even bothering looking up to discover what he already knew.
Solid Snake released the air vent he was hanging to and screwed his landing.
-It doesn't look really solid, he announced, his chin against the cement floor and his ass pointing up in a Johnny Sasaki style.
-You think you can...what are you laughing at, Kaz ?
Miller's smile disappeared.
-No...nothing.
Ten minutes later, the metallic grid crashed at their feet. They rooted to the spot, the sound echoing around them. The moaning of some ill soldier nearby was still the only background music. They were unnoticed.
-I will give you a leg up, proposed Naked Snake. His clone joyfully put a foot on his face and another on his head, ignoring his stretched arms.
-What do you see ? asked Big Boss, Kazuhira still contemplating the footprint on his comrade's left cheek. The two men looked at each others with a furrowed brow to the sound of footsteps above their head.
-Is this air duct so big he can actually walk in it ? stuttered Kaz.
An exclamation of pure joy resounded above their head.
-I found a ration ! God, that's disgusting.
-Stop whining, commented Big Boss. There's nothing more repugnant than a flying squirrel.
Without warning, Solid Snake's head appeared upside down. The worn out end of his bandanna came gently touching Miller's nose. Then his knees. When the cloth reached his bare feet, Kaz started to think something was wrong.
-Now I understand why you're called « Snake ». Does your bandanna lengthen each time you eat something ?
Noting that Kaz was spending to many time with Huey given the weird references he was using, Big Boss pushed him aside to ask Solid Snake the reason of his early come back without a commentary about that long ass bandanna.
-You're finished ?
The man's awkward silence overcame this possibility.
-What was the question again ?
Naked Snake froze, nearly amazed by a memory worthy « Winchester », Huey's favorite hard drive. Storing his irritation for next time he would find himself alone with Kaz in Mother Base's sauna, he calmly repeated :
-What do you see ?
-Ammo ! immediately responded Solid Snake, making his doppelganger wonder why he asked him to remind him the question if he already knew the answer.
-Great ! You can always try throwing it at the enemies. With a little luck, they'll swallow it and smother to death ! commented Kazuhira.
-Master, you're being so negative.
-Why does he keep calling me master ? mumbled Kaz.
-He's right, retorted Big Boss, preoccupied. Besides Volgin, I don't see who could use those without the gun that goes with it.
Solid Snake's head once again disappeared inside the air duct.
-I'll try to go a little further !
Big Boss turned towards Kazuhira, who was trying to hide his personal belongings behind his hands.
-I see you still got scars in inappropriate places.
The blond man's hands crisped a bit more.
-Boss…
Solid Snake put his head through the hole in the ceiling.
-There is another cell next to that one. I will check it out.
He left. Big Boss stared at the ceiling for a few seconds.
-I wonder why he became so responsible all of a sudden.
Kazuhira shrug his shoulders without a word.
-Can I have your vest, Boss ?
Snake sighed but managed anyways to take off his uniform top and handed it to the blond man. The latter wrapped it around his waist like a towel without commenting the fact Big Boss was still wearing a sneaking suit five minutes ago. He was finishing the attach when he noticed his comrade's disappearance. Miller looked everywhere : left, right, even above is head. He finally found feet sticking out from under the dirty looking bed in the corner.
-Boss...I have to tell you something. When you use a bed, you have to lie on it, not under it.
-Snake, to use the bed, press the action button ! A mocking voice came from under the bed.
-There's no need to hide in a prison when you're already in a cell.
Big Boss finally emerged from under the bed, proudly holding a dead rodent by the tail.
-And here's a fresh mouse for dinner !
-I think « fresh » is a little bit optimistic, Snake, remarked Kaz when the corpse started to fall apart.
-Maybe you're right, admitted Big Boss, contemplating the tail left alone in his hand.
-You caught a wild tail ! That's so awesome ! said another voice.
Solid Snake was back without them noticing. He tried to lean towards the two men below him, lost his balance and just fell from the ceiling.
-There is a woman in the next cell, he announced before standing up.
Kaz, forgetting his clothes issues, raised his head.
-A what ?
Big Boss frenetically got between them.
-A whovian ! He said there is a whovian in the next cell !
Solid Snake frowned.
-No ! I said…
His foot was once again crushed. At the same time, his awkward situation alarm rang. Big Boss threatened him with the tail he was still holding.
-Didn't I say to disable this thing ?!
Solid Snake narrowly avoided the deadly weapon.
-That's not my awkward-situation alarm ! It's my clock one !
-In the middle of the afternoon ? And why is it the same sound as the awkward one ?
Solid Snake rapidly tapped away on a invisible keyboard and undertook to enumerate his various alarms along with the matching sound.
-This is the one for when I'd have to let my dog out if I had one... This one reminds me to feed my komodo dragon...
-It would be great to have a komodo dragon, pensively remarked Kazuhira.
Big Boss swept the proposition from the table.
-I gave you the green light for the sauna. But please don't bring back a giant lizard on Mother Base.
Solid Snake was pursuing his list.
-That one is for Mei-Ling calls…
-That's really discrete, mumbled Kaz.
Big Boss sat back on his turned bucket.
-You do realize the sound is the same for all of your alarms, he tranquilly remarked.
-My nanomachines are from the first gen. I only have two sounds available for the moment. I'm waiting for the next upgrade.
Kazuhira raised a finger, still curious.
-What's the other one ?
-The ride of the Valkyries, if I remember well. Two seconds, I switch to that one.
-Why do you not simply activate the silent mode ? sighed Kaz.
-I...don't think there's one.
-That's a bit stupid for a sneaking mission.
Naked Snake looked daggers at him, making the blond man take a step away.
-Kaz ! I once wear a crocodile mask for this type of mission !
-What ? You never told me about that one !
Big Boss jumped on his feet, knocking over the bucket. The metal container rolled on the cement floor until it hit Kaz's bare ankles.
-You never asked.
Solid Snake timidly tried to interrupt them.
-There is…
Kazuhira pushed the bucket away with his foot.
-Now that we're at it, I find all this stuff with boxes stupid too !
-HOW DARE YOU SPEAK OF BOXES IN SUCH AN INDELICATE WAY ?!
Solid Snake raised an arm.
-There is a…
Big Boss turned away from his right hand man to face Snake.
-SHUT THE FUCK UP !
Solid Snake stayed astonished for a few seconds, then turned his back to them and sat in the corner of the cell, his chin resting on his knees. A guilty look painted on Big Boss face. He took a step toward the sulking man, his arm stretched in his direction.
-Look, Snake, I didn't mean to…
He stopped, uneasy. His arm fell back alongside his body. He slowly did a turn along. Someone was picking at them through the rusty iron bars. Two non-assorted eyes met his blue one. The newcomer's totally blank pupil, even if it might be blind, was uncomfortably piercing him. The small opening in the door didn't let him detail the rest of his features.
-I have a message for you, articulated the newcomer in a metallic voice.
-A message ?
Solid Snake crossed his arms on his chest with a sufficient smile.
-I tried to warn you someone was here !
The visitor caught back their attention by tapping on one of the iron bars.
-I was sent by... He extirpated a creased paper from God knows where and tried to unfold it. « ...I can't read this. He wrote his name down there. »
He gave the note to Big Boss who gave a quick look at it.
-No kidding, it's written in japanese…Kaz !
The latter dragged his feet in his direction and grabbed the paper. After a few seconds, he raised his head to ask:
-Are you sure this is the real thing ?
-Why ?
Kaz raised the note above his head.
-It says « I'm Date Masamune »
Both Snakes looked at each others. Then at the intruder, who shrugged as a sign of incomprehension. Big Boss shook his head.
-Forget the name, what is the message about ?
The armored man pushed something through the iron bars. Kazuhira gave a disapproving look to the object.
-I conclude that a samurai dead for almost half a millennium sent an armored swordsman to three people he doesn't even know in order to give them a bottle of ketchup ?
The ride of the Valkyries filled the air.
-See ? Even this guy's awkward situation alarm agrees with me.
-It's not the alarm, it's the major, denied Solid Snake.
Kaz grinned.
-With the same sound again ?
Solid Snake put a knee to the ground and two fingers on his right ear, forgetting his codec was now integrated to his nanomachines and thus he was no longer wearing headphones. The major seemed to be in a hurry:
-Snake ! Did you find the DARPA chief ?
-No. But I found Master Miller !
-What is he even doing here ?
-I have no idea, but he dyed his hair blond.
-What ? He didn't even ask my approval before doing so !
-I...don't see the problem here…
-Anyway Snake, you have to find the DARPA chief !
Confused, Snake repeated:
-The DARPA chief ?
-Yes, where are you now?
-Uh...in prison. But a cyborg ninja brought me a bottle of ketchup.
-That's fine then. Good luck !
Solid Snake struggled to his feet thanks to Kaz standing on the end of his bandanna without realizing. Big Boss casually questionned:
-What's up ?
-We have to find the DARPA chief !
Big Boss raised an eyebrow, waiting for some precision. Seeing that Solid Snake was still starring at him, he asked:
-Who's the DARPA chief ?
-Haha...no idea.
« It's my turn to do the facepalm », whispered Kazuhira.
Shadow Moses Island, Otacon's Lab, 2005
Otacon removed his thick coat and sat loudly in a rolling chair. A light green parrot, gripped to the edge of his desk, opened his hooked beak.
-I missed you, Hal.
-You're going to say that each time I come back ?
-I missed you, Hal.
-And if I'm just going to the bathroom ?
-I will miss you, Hal.
-You know how to use the future !
-I miss you, Hal.
Emmerich stared at the bird. The parrot stared back at him. Raiden stared at them.
-Isn't that parrot...he began. He remember soon enough not to pronounce her name. The parrot gave him a suspicious look, tilting of the head from one side. After a few seconds, he said « I need scissors ! 61 ! ».
-Hey, how do you...
Please, correct my mistakes... I'm not familiar with the beta reader thing...
Hope you enjoyed it ! Please review !
PS: if one day I learn how to draw, I immediately make a cover picture for this fic.