Chapter 3: Habits

Reagan POV

"It's been three weeks since you left the hospital. You need to snap out of it." Reagan's cousin, Taylor said.

Reagan just gave her a look as she was packing her DJ equipment into a crate.

"I mean what do you expect. You hit rock bottom and you can just stay there or get out." Tay said.

"As a matter of fact, I have snapped out of it. I'm playing at some weird, racy, underground rave tonight." Reagan snapped at her.

Tay plopped down on one of the crates looking defeated.

"Well that's good… I just wished you would smile more cuz."

Reagan kneeled down in front of her cousin.

"Hey. I'm sorry. I'm fine, really. You don't need to worry about me. I had a moment, I messed up, but I'm better now. I won't do it again. I promise."

Reagan knew that was a lie but she couldn't bear to see her cousin sad for her. The only problem is she didn't know if the lie was if she was fine or if she wouldn't do it again.

…..

Amy POV

It's been three weeks since Amy's mother looked her directly in the eye.

It's been three weeks of Amy carrying this back breaking guilt.

It's been three weeks and Amy still hasn't stopped using.

…

Amy's phone beeps and she quickly grabs it.

Lewis:

I can get it to you by tmmr.

There was no way Amy could hold off from using by tomorrow.

Amy:

That's not good enough. I NEED it tonight.

Lewis:

Alright, calm down Junkie. I'll see what I can do.

Amy couldn't help but to roll her eyes at that last comment. But deep down she knew it was true. If the pain and the constant reminder of what she did was not enough to drive her over the edge. Then Amy would have probably waited until tomorrow. But the Junkie inside her needed it tonight. After all. It was another Friday "girls" night that Karma cancelled to hang out with Liam. I guess even with Karma, the 30 seconds of pleasure that Liam brought her on a bed was much better than the three hours of awkward silence Amy brings on Girl's Night.

…..

Maybe Amy should have waited till tomorrow. The "I'll see what I can do" involved Amy, Shane, and Lauren driving at least an hour to go to some weird underground rave. It would have been find if it was just Amy but somehow her plans slipped out and Shane and Lauren decided to invite themselves. Shane was the only one who knew about her bad habit and he didn't approve of it but he knew there was nothing he could do.

"Where exactly are we going!" Lauren yelled at both of them.

"We are going to an underground rave Lauren. It's going to be fun." Shane replied.

"What part about of jumping up and down to some weird Skrillex song while sweaty guys are constantly trying to rub their junk on you is fun?"

"I don't know Lauren. Maybe next time you just shouldn't invite yourself." Amy snapped at Lauren. That got everyone quiet and the rest of the ride was ridden in uncomfortable silence.

Amy knew she was being hard on Lauren. But these past three weeks were exhausting on her. Her mother did not even acknowledge what she found under Amy's bed. Amy still wasn't sure if that was a relief/wake-up call or gives her more reason to continue this habit. And finding out that you are addicted to something deadly isn't a walk in the park either.

The gang finally made it to their destination. As they were about to walk inside Shane pulls Amy aside and lets Lauren walk inside.

"Amy you told me this was gonna be an occasional thing. But it looks like you are becoming a certified coke-addict. I thought you were gonna stop this after you Literally put your mom in the hospital." Shane said sounding genuinely concerned.

"Shane I'm fine, really. You don't need to worry about me. I'm a little messed up now but I'll be better soon. I'm gonna stop using soon but I just really need it right now."

Amy knew that was a lie but she couldn't bear to see Shane worried for her. The only problem is she didn't know if the lie was if she was fine or if she would stop using soon.