A/N: Here's a particular subgenre that really needs to be more popular.

Undersiders' Others

Worm/His Dark Materials

William Manton was not happy.

Okay, that was a bit of a misnomer. Ever since his daughter and wife died, the closest thing he got to happiness was the sense of vicious vindication he felt observing his...other half's ability to destroy.

It was just that his normal mood was overpowering depression, rather than overwhelming frustration and anger.

"THEY BLEW HER UP! THEY BLEW SIBERIAN UP!"

This was something of a misnomer - rather, due to a sequence of events involving an impromptu team-up with the Wards, Regent's power, and Skitter being certifiably insane when it came to her plan Bs, the opposition had somehow managed to open wound the other half of Manton's soul, causing the energy matrix that kept her dark matter matrix in check...

In plain English, though, they exposed the Siberian's heart to the air, and that caused her to explode. A very pretty, very golden explosion.

"Ah, don't feel too bad, uncle Willy," said Bonesaw, perhaps the only other member of the S9 not gawking at their newest recruitment prospect or trying very hard not to laugh at Manton's fury or the Siberian's...current circumstances. "You got a kitty out of it!"

Much to his credit, Manton still possessed enough self control to put the Swearing Bag over his mouth before he articulated his exact opinion on the monochrome cat that used to be his extension.

For that was what the Siberian had become. While Manton was knocked unconscious from sudden pain, a bit of the golden dust had animated and almost limped back to him, solidifying into a striped, black-and-white cat that was currently engaged in roleplaying as Jigsaw with the World's Unluckiest Mouse (which was now the Slightly Less Unlucky Mouse, as his other title had previously been Riley's Favorite Lab Mouse).

After the fallen Cauldron scientist ran out of steam, Jack Slash tore himself away from gawking at the screen...to laugh at the Siberian Kitten, which caused the Swearing Bag to go right back on Manton's face for the next minute, for Jack was an ass like that.

After Manton ran out of steam completely this time, the S9's leader furrowed his fingers. "Care to explain why her residue suddenly started to walk off and follow the Undersiders?"

"The other reason I'm pissed-sorry Bonesaw-the explosion dislocated their souls."

Jack blinked. "Sorry?"

"My shard isn't the only component of Siberian, Jack," Manton explained, obviously happy to finally know more about this than his boss. "It's simply what allows her to materialize outside of my normal spiritual structure and makes her so humanoid and lethal, actually. That cat is her true form-a physical manifestation of a vital aspect of my subconscious."

"Really?" Jack was paying close attention now. There was a way to bring the subconscious into a living form?

Manton caught on to this. "Don't bother. All daemons are as difficult to severely injure as she is - they're dark matter-based organisms in that form, and dark matter literally does not play by the same rules as you or I. Even if destroyed without severing them from their owners - which those knives can't do, it requires a form of exotic energy and material to even attempt - they just reform after a lot of pain on the owner's part. As you have already seen."

"Shoot," the boss said, deflated. Then he caught on to the implications. "Wait, you're saying that-"

"A significant portion of our enemies now have Siberians of their own? Smaller and less offensively lethal, but yes."

A very long pause followed. Then Jack cleared his throat. "Poppet, do you mind if I swear on this point?"

"Not at all."

"Thank you. Motherfucker."

The Undersiders were expecting many things from Alec's daemon after they figured out what the clouds following them around were (because one told them after he made himself into a fox that was now pulling double-duty as Lisa's scarf). Aggressive, caustic, and a huge bitch, for one.

These were all right on the money, but nobody expected the monkey to look...malnourished.

She wheezed even as she stood on unsteady feet, looking defiant despite herself. "What're you looking-hack-at? I-gack-didn't choose this-gaahhh-form deliberately..."

She then immediately tumbled over, seemingly too weak to stand at the moment. Instantly, a tabby ran over and helped the rhesus macaque to on to his back, balanced by a giant tarantula.

The respective owners of said daemons stood back, jaws agape.

Slowly, Taylor's mouth closed as she shook her head. "Alec...is there...something...you want to tell us?"

The boy raised an eyebrow. "Did the 'I'm Heartbreaker's son' line mean nothing to you? Honestly, I'm surprised she's just a supermodel monkey. If you asked me beforehand, I'd have thought she'd be missing an arm."

Aisha cradled her head. "We did, but-Holy fuck Alec. You didn't tell us you were...this screwed up."

"Hey, dorks, I manage. Really, I'm a lot better than I was. Just you wait, we'll have this little girl off the cover of Anorexia Monthly in time for the November issue." Gingerly, the bodyjacker took his daemon from the tabby, allowing her to piggyback.

The spider ran back over to his other half, looking almost as shocked even without a recognizable face. "Well...that happened."

"I just...wow," the cat conferred. "I mean...Regent? Mr. Happy-Go-Lucky Asshole? I mean, we knew, but...fuck. We thought he escaped from the worst or something."

The monkey opened an eye, glaring at the cat. "Don't you pity me. I'm still not the worst reveal though, am I?"

If it was possible for a cat to blush, he was definitely doing it now.

"Fucking Clockblocker," muttered the younger Laborn.

The Day Before

"...What's so funny?"

Neither Vista nor Imp was sure who asked that question first.

Clockblocker's only response was to laugh harder.

On the viewscreen, the demon-masked girl got up from her chair, daemon in hand. "Seriously, you're ruining my Blofeld moment. What's the big idea?"

Somehow, the time-stopper managed to stop laughing for a second.

"Sorry, it's hard to take a girl who keeps on stroking her pussy in public seriously."

Then he returned to laughing, this time joined by the sound of his teammate's face impacting the ground.

The cat tried to curl into nonexistence. "We set ourselves up for that one," he muttered into his owner's arm.

Slowly, Imp's mouth started working again. "Um, if you need me, I'll be practicing my powers. For the next year."

And with that, Clockblocker suddenly stopped. What did he find so hilarious again?