It had been a relief when Elrohir, frustrated by his refusal to explain his most embarrassing tears, had stormed off saying he was going to sort something out.
Without his presence in the room Legolas felt he could at least breathe and begin to pull himself together although how he would cope when Elrohir found out the truth, as he most certainly would, he did not know. Still he finished his bath which did refresh him and tried his best to put the whole sordid thing to the back of his mind. If only he could remember what had actually happened!
He had just finished dressing when there was a knock on the door. He did not want company right now, was it too much to expect people to just leave him alone?
He opened the door with a scowl on his face to find Aragorn standing there.
"Yes?" He snapped angrily.
"Not much of a welcome Legolas, Can I come in?"
"I am not in the mood to entertain."
"That much is apparent." and Aragorn sauntered through the door anyway.
"Oh come right in then," Legolas said with sarcasm. "Don't let me stop you."
"I am King now, you can't stop me." Aragorn said with a smile and Legolas knew he was just teasing him but today he did NOT appreciate it and so he did not answer the grin with one of his own.
"What do you want." the sooner he let Aragorn say his piece the sooner he would be gone.
Aragorn raised his eyebrows, obviously surprised by the abruptness.
" I have bought you something." He said his face instantly all seriousness. "I thought you might like it back."
Legolas's stomach churned as he saw it was his shirt Aragorn held in his hand. What did he do about this?
"Thank you." He snatched at it with indecent haste.
"That cellar must have been cold last night It seems strange Legolas that you would be removing items of clothing."
Legolas's mind raced in search of an explanation.
"The floor was also extremely hard. I needed a pillow." was the best he could come up with.
"Then why did you toss your pillow randomly in the corner?"
"So I could sleep as far away from Elladan as was possible." He was getting angry now, more angry than he had been to start with. What was with this inquisition?
"As far away from him as possible? I don't think so Legolas. I am not a fool."
He had long ago learnt the best form of defence was often attack and he used that knowledge now.
"Just what are you insinuating?"
"I do not have to insinuate anything. It was obvious what the pair of you had been up to. I must admit I have never understood you and Elrohir but you go too far this time."
"You do not understand!" Why was it, he wondered, that everyone was so quick to think the worst of him?
"You are right, I do not understand. Why would you do this? What is going on in your head?"
"I thought he was Elrohir!" He cried in frustration.
Aragorn's response was cold.
"Do not lie to me, It has been centuries since you mistook them if in fact you ever did."
Legolas felt as if the breath had been knocked out of him. There was nothing he could say to defend himself, nothing Aragorn would believe at least. The thin line of control he had gained over his unhappiness began to crack and he wavered.
"It is true."
It was all he had.
Aragorn's face creased with concern and he placed a hand on his shoulder.
"What is wrong Legolas?"
He shook his head resolutely.
"Nothing is wrong."
"I am worried about you. You have not been right for days. Do not deny it, and this is so self destructive, so unlike you. It makes no sense."
"Nothing is wrong."
Legolas found he could say no more than that. He did not want to have this discussion. Not with Aragorn. He was the last person he wanted to talk about his recent melancholy with.
But Aragorn would not let it go.
"Now I know you lie, for it is obvious something is amiss with you. Let me help."
"No, you cannot help. Leave me be."
"I will not leave this be."
Backed into a corner Legolas lashed out, he was not going to risk losing control in front of his friend.
"Get out." His voice was cool and hard.
But Aragorn was not listening.
"Whatever is causing this just tell me. I can see you are unhappy."
"Get out!" Legolas pushed him away aggressively, "Get out! Will you not all leave me alone, Just get out! I will tell you nothing because there is nothing to tell. Go away, Go speak to Elladan since you will not listen to me."
"Legolas..." Aragorn held up his hands in supplication but Legolas had finally lost his control completely.
"I told you to get out!" He yelled and Aragorn, deciding discretion was indeed the better part of valour when faced with an irate wood elf did as he was told.
...
Legolas took himself off for a walk once Aragorn had departed. It had become clear to him if he stayed where he was in his room he would just end up with another visitor and judging by his recent luck it was bound to be someone he didn't like or had no wish to see.
He ended up in the gardens. As far as he was concerned there were far too few gardens in Minas Tirith. Too much stone, too little plants, Aragorn really had to remedy that.
He paused as he entered, the trees were soothing him already. How he had missed them. He could feel the sea longing dancing about at the edges of his consciousness. Perhaps he should indulge in it for awhile? He had found it to be a pleasant way to pass the time on occasion. The idea of that escape tempted him but his thoughts were shattered by a light, joyful voice calling his name.
"Legolas!"
Just his luck he was not alone even here. It was Arwen, reclining leisurely in the shade of a tree and her face had lit up at the sight of him. Arwen, someone else he was avoiding. Still
He had no option but to join her now.
He wandered over, a smile on his face, as if there was nothing he would rather do than enjoy her company and sat down beside her.
"It has been too long Legolas," she smiled at him, "I have hardly seen you here, what have you been up to?"
"Ah, nothing much," he gestured vaguely into space.
"I did see you the night of the coronation with Gimli." Arwens grin was wide, "You seemed quite merry then!" He knew she was poking fun but it did not irritate him. Arwen's company was always soothing for his soul.
"Gimli is dangerous company!" He laughed, "Do you know he attempted to poison me that evening? He failed of course. I was far too clever for him."
He had forgotten all about that. He had still to get revenge over Gimli for that unfortunate experience. He really had to think of something appropriate he could do.
"You are miles away Legolas!" Arwen's voice sounded in his ear and he jumped.
"I was planning my revenge."
"As long as you leave Estel out of it. He is stressed enough as it is."
"I have noticed that." Legolas muttered and his depression began to return, He did not want to think of Aragorn. "I am not happy with him." He confessed.
Arwen leaned towards him all concentration.
"He is worried about you. Does he have good cause or does he just overreact as he can be known to?"
Now was his chance to dismiss this topic of conversation but Legolas found he did not want to. Something about speaking to Arwen was strangely appealing.
"Perhaps I have given him some cause" he mumbled and he plucked a piece of grass and spun it between his fingers.
Arwen watched him quietly.
" Is it my brother who gives you problems?"
He looked up startled,
"Which one?" He said without thinking.
Arwen gave him a look of understanding.
"Well Elrohir was my obvious choice but it seems it is not he? What has Elladan done to hurt you so?"
When it came to it he found he could not tell her so he sighed, leaning back against the tree that sheltered them.
"I am afraid I am not his favourite person." He said quietly.
"Ignore him then." Arwen smiled sweetly and leaned into him resting her head on his chest. "for I will tell you Legolas, you are one of my most favourite people and that should be enough for you!"
He placed his arm around her protectively and for awhile they sat in silence as he let her very calmness wash over him. It took away the jagged edges of his grief and guilt. If only he could sort out this mess with Elrohir, if only..
"It is not you Elrohir doubts but himself." Arwen's words bought him out of his reverie with a jolt and he threw her a suspicious glance.
"What?" she asked, "Why that look?"
"Sometimes you remind me far too strongly of your Grandmother." He said. "Were you reading my mind?"
"No," she laughed merrily at his discomfort, "but I know my brothers!"
"Elrohir does not believe himself good enough for you. That is the cause of his problem, not you."
"I know that," he replied with a deep breath. "Sometimes it is wearying."
"You are good for him." She clasped his arm. "Do not let Elladan tell you otherwise."
"Perhaps he is right?" Legolas said bitterly in reply.
Arwen sat up and looked at him directly,
"I say he is not right." she said firmly.
"I can think of no one better for my Brother. I am glad he has you. It makes me rest easier knowing you will be a part of the future that lies ahead of him."
He turned his face from her for he knew she spoke of the future she would not be a part of. The nagging pain in his heart that had dogged him for days surged up anew and washed over him scattering his newfound peace before it. Tears prickled afresh in his eyes.
"Legolas?"
Suddenly he wanted to run away. He didn't want to face this grief in front of her,one of those he would be losing but Arwen would not let him run. She clasped his face in her hands.
"Is this what bothers you? Not my brothers? Is this what you hide from Estel?"
He did not trust himself to speak but she gave him no option.
"It has been hard," he stumbled over his words, "I have been finding it hard...the last few days...Aragorn, Gimli...You..." He voice trailed to a stop.
Arwen's face was grave as she watched him.
"I am sorry," she said gently and she stroked her fingers across his cheek. "I am sorry to cause you such pain."
Then she sat back.
"You must speak to Elrohir." she said with determination.
He smiled sadly at that.
"I cannot. He is the last one I can speak to. He has his own pain. I cannot burden him with mine."
"He understands this! It will not burden him, it will help him if you let him in, for him to see he is not the only who hurts, for you to trust him with two of you must help each other with this...later..."
"No." he did not agree, "It will only give him further reason to resent Aragorn, for my pain as well as...you."
"Then do not let him!"
She made it sound so simple and he found himself actually contemplating telling Elrohir of the grief that had been choking him for days. Was she right? Could it help Elrohir to know this?
"Do not tell Aragorn of this." He said, "There is no point his knowing."
The smile she gifted him with was a sad one.
"He knows already Legolas. He is not blind and you are not that clever in deceiving him. He is terrified for you. It makes him quite bad tempered! When will you learn keeping things secret is not always best."
He pondered on that for quite awhile and in the end once again it was Arwen who broke the silence and disturbed his brooding.
"Father was speaking to me earlier," she said. "I must say I have my doubts about this plan you and he have come up with."
"What plan?" He was confused, he could not remember any plan he had made with Elrond.
"About the wedding." She said, "Have you actually spoken to your Father about this? Does he know?"
"My Father?" His confusion grew by the minute. "He is not coming to the wedding."
"I know," Arwen said earnestly, "Which makes it even less likely he will want to pay for it."
"Pay for it?"
At the back of his mind something was niggling, a vague memory of Elrond asking him something...and him agreeing when he didn't really know what it was...and Erestor's horrified face.
"Pay for it?" he repeated.
His blood began to run cold,
"You did not agree to it then?" Arwen asked, "because Father is definitely of the opinion that you did. I thought he had to be mistaken."
"My father will not pay for the wedding." Legolas said numbly, "What have I done?"
"You DID agree to it? Seriously Legolas?"
"I might have." he said uncertainly, his life flashing before his eyes.
Just when he thought life could not possibly get any worse, it seemed it just had.