Damn… I haven't updated for a long while. Well, I hope you aren't too mad… *growls from crowd to the left* *growls from crowd to the right*
Here's my explanation: My Wi-Fi was broken! *crowd groans*
CROWD: You were just too lazy!
ME: Okay – Fine. But my Wi-Fi was broken! And this chapter is very long, I assure you!
HAGRID: 'Allo, readers! I'm 'ere fer some more chapters! 'An maybe 'is time I'll get in the chapter!
ME: Hagrid, you're overthinking things (wow, that's a first)
HAGRID: I'm just makin' it faire!
ME: Can I actually write it?!
HAGRID: 'Aye
ME: I don't own you or anyone else
HAGRID: …
ME: But I can control your actions in fanfiction… hehehe
What do you think? Should I add Hagrid into this? Or maybe another character you can think of – like Dobby? (Why? Why'd she have to kill him off! J.K.R. created a wonderful, entertaining, joyous character, and she plunges a knife into his tiny chest!) I'll be keeping an eye out for reviews! :)
Also, I'm changing the storyline some. Someone corrected the presses and Sirius Black is off the hook. So there will be no problem with him coming with them in public. Okay? Okay.
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Soon it was my turn. I nervously held out my hand and dumped the green powder into the grate. Being careful not to stutter, I clearly yelled out, "DIAGON ALLEY!" and jumped.
I felt like my insides were all slamming into each other, and my throat became dry. With compression to all sides, I wondered if this was normal for floo powder travel. Finally it all stopped; the pain went as quickly as it came. I hit something hard and came tumbling out of a stone structure onto another hard surface. I opened my eyes to see that I was sprawled out on the floor, right next to the fireplace. Where I was, I had no clue. But judging from the others' expressions, they seemed to know.
"Well, how was it?" George pulled my up by my arm.
"Woah. Rush of adrenaline, that." I sputtered as I laughed. He laughed as well.
"The first time is the worst." Harry added. "I remember in my second year when I tried it; it was awful."
"But you get used to it." Fred called from behind his twin. He peeked his head out so it looked like his head was molding out of George's side. Must be some illusion. However, I didn't really get a chance to laugh at him, because someone bumped into me with force.
"Excuse me!" The woman's high-pitched voice rang out. "I must get to the Ministry! You see, Fudge is waiting for my expertise."
I turned around just in time to see her face before she ran off. I was disgusted.
Not because her voice was a child's, but because she looked just like an enormous pink fuzzy toad. I had never even known a person could look so ugly! Not even ghosts! I couldn't hold in my giggles for anything. So I quickly clamped my hand over my mouth. Though the twins were rolling on the floor, laughing their heads off.
Unfortunately, they were far too loud. Absolutely everyone turned around to face them; including Ms. Toad herself.
"Is there a problem?" There was a fake smile plastered on her face, but even so I could still detect the anger in her eyes. Thankfully, Mrs. Weasley marched over.
"I'm sorry for disrupting you, ma'am. Have my children done you any harm?" she casually asked, as if she had done this a million times before.
"Well," the woman snootily prompted, "You should keep an eye on those brats. I saw them teasing other wizards and witches; including me. And they were rolling on the floor to become dirty – like animals." And that's when I lost it.
"How dare you?!" I snapped, making everyone jump. "I was there! I saw the whole thing! They weren't doing anything like that! In fact, the only person here who has done anything wrong – is you." I had my pointer finger pointing directly at that old lady's face, just inches away.
There was silence until she argued back, "Well, no one cares about you. You're just a child." She extended the words like she thought I couldn't understand them. I wiped her spit off my cheek. Then I returned the favor.
I spit in her face.
Her scream was so high and shrill that even the bartender, Tom, had to slam his hands over his ears. "What's all this ruckus?" he curiously asked.
"Just you wait until your next year," she sneered. "Then you won't be laughing!" she looked like she wanted to laugh evilly, but knew better than to do it as an adult. So she just pointed her nose to the air.
Remus and the golden trio stepped next to us. "And what do you mean by that?" Hermione asked.
The witch flashed us a fake smile. "You'll find out." Then she sashayed out the door, messing up everything completely.
I was holding in a rather rude laugh – well, trying to. But once the door creaked shut, I couldn't help myself. I burst out a cackle like the wicked witch of the west – the Wizard of Oz kind. (Which was completely fine, since almost everyone else was laughing as well with me; though Mr. Weasley was glaring at me.)
"Must you insult her when I'm in her sight? She could have fired me!" he exclaimed.
"What?" I caught my breath, "What are you talking about?"
He replied, "Her name is Dolores Umbridge; she's working with Fudge!" his lip quivered. "If she had seen – and she may have actually seen – me, then I'll be fired. I can't afford to lose my Ministry job!"
My smile faded; as did the others'. That toad worked with the Prime Minister?! I was shocked; and I wasn't the only one.
"What?! How could she even bloody work at the Ministry?!" Ron exclaimed.
"Watch your language!" Strangely, both Mrs. Weasley and Hermione hissed that at the same time. (Hermione was the only one who blushed, though.)
"Who would even hire her?" Fred joked. We all looked towards Mr. Weasley. He seemed ashamed of himself.
"Are you saying that it was you who hired her?!" Harry looked appalled. "How?!"
"Well," he explained, "She can be very… convincing."
"Siriusly?" Sirius stated. (Do you get it? *wink*) "What on Earth would convince you to get her in the Ministry of Magic committee?"
Mr. Weasley sighed. "I hired her two years ago as my secretary. How was I supposed to know that she could be so manipulative? She found her way to the very top of the line. How; I don't know.
"The worst part is that she's coming to Hogwarts this year."
There was silence after that; I'm not surprised. I'm mad. My first year of magic schooling and that toad is going to ruin it. I sure hope that he meant Umbridge was coming as a first year and not a teacher…
"Bloody hell Weasley!" Sirius suddenly announced. "Hogwarts; are you sure you're not joking?"
"I'm not. Since Dumbledore hasn't found anyone for the DADA position yet, Fudge is sending her over for the job."
"I'm sure she won't be too happy when she finds out we're gonna be there, though." Fred added. At this, everyone laughed.
"I know one thing," George mischievously smiled at me, "This is gonna be the best year yet."
We all followed Sirius over to the back of the Leaky Cauldron (finally found out the name of this place). He tapped some bricks with his wand and suddenly the wall caved in to Diagon Alley. Wandering through the street was difficult at first, as we slowly blended into the crowd. Our first stop was at Gringotts, the magical bank, where I would finally find a use for the vault key.
We passed two very large wizards on our way in. And let me just say – I would not want to mess around with those guys. Inside the doors were magnificent wall carvings, pristine architecture, and… goblins. It just had to be goblins, of all creatures…
Here is some trivia about goblins:
They are ugly. Beyond ugly. No doubt about it.
They think everything goblin-made is theirs. I mean, when someone buys a goblin-made object, they just think of it as 'borrowing'. As if the wizard/witch is going to let them touch it again…
They are manipulative. Proceed with caution.
We walked to the front desk where a goblin was writing with a quill dipped in ink. Hasn't he ever heard of a pen? He was wearing a tuxedo, with his slick white hair pushed back and his tiny glasses framing his crooked nose. Sirius rudely coughed to get his attention, and he looked down at us with his beetle-like eyes.
"Name," he choked out, "please?"
"Danielle Time" I called out, with my arm hanging in the air holding the key.
"Danielle Time… Danielle Time…" he mumbled as he flipped through his large dusty book. "Ah, here you are!" He pointed to the middle of the page. "You have your vault key, I presume?"
I nodded, dumbfound; I had never even registered! Clockwork, though… may have.
Another goblin came towards us with his hand open. He looked even uglier than the others; if that was possible. I cringed as I dropped the key into his palm.
"Griphook is my name. Follow me." He led us to a small golden cart on a rusty track. He gestured for us to get in.
"There's only room for four, and that's not including Griphook." I heard Sirius say. "Who's going?"
"Well, obviously there's Dani and Griphook…" George said. "I can go as well; I like roller coasters."
"Me too!" Fred agreed.
"There needs to be an adult." Mrs. Weasley stated. "Arthur, would you,"
She was cut off by Sirius. "I'll do it! I'll do it for the hope!" With that, he scampered in the middle row with Griphook next to him. Immediately he cringed when he saw that he was sitting near the goblin, who was sitting in the first row.
"Hope?" Ginny asked, "The hope of turning Dani like you guys?" She sighed. "I don't want Dani to be a prankster; we have enough of those."
I ignored the laughter – and the warmth in my face – as me and George climbed into the back row.
There were no safety belts at all; no clasps or anything. I relaxed in my seat – big mistake. Griphook speed us down the tracks like a maniac, at almost the speed of light. I panicked as I tried to grasp anything, anything at all. I squeezed something that was both hard and soft and I didn't let go until the sharp turn was over.
Once we were on a straight path again, I looked down for my hand. It was grasping George's arm. I followed with my eyes up to his elbow, his shoulder, his jaw, and finally his eyes. He looked somewhat shocked, with his mouth slight ajar. I immediately let go and looked away.
I swear, this place is just full of underground tunnels. You never know what direction you're headed until it's too late!
Suddenly we dropped down. And by that, I mean that the floor fell underneath us, and we all slid down accidently from out seats. The only parachute was connected to Griphook – of course. I think I grasped George's hand again, but I didn't particularly care at the moment. I was screaming at the top of my lungs along with the shouting twins. Griphook was smirking. Sirius was laughing his head off.
I am so done with them those four. Maybe.
We landed hard on the rocky floor, the sharp edges just making it worse. Hopefully, my scraped knees will hold out until we get back to the cart. I let George pull me up by the arm and we all followed Griphook to a small vault just a few feet away.
"Woah. What's with your vault?" Fred asked. He was gaping just like the rest of us, even Griphook.
It was strange, that's for sure. Neon green design carvings were all over the raven black vault. And it was small – just enough that Sirius could touch the ceiling with the top of his head, so he had to crouch. Griphook held out his hand to the oval touchpad just next to the door. The vault opened, and we all peered inside.
Inside there was three piles, all the same size. The left pile was sickles, the middle pile was gallons, and the last pile was knuts. All three came up to my waist in height. I reminded myself to thank Clockwork the next time I saw him.
I saw a leather handbag just lying on the ground in front of me; I picked it up, opened its front flap, and shoved a handful from each pile into it. I was amazed by two things:
When I took some coins from the pile, it would immediately be replaced as soon as I took my hand away. Thank you, Clocky!
The bag was some kind of special disappearing trick. No matter how much I put into it, it would always seem empty from the outside. Magic, the source of all wonderful creations.
How was any of this possible? Oh well, I might as well get used to it. I grabbed some extra handfuls of gallons – immediately replaced. I shoved the handbag into my slingbag. We all walked out following Griphook to another cart to take us back to the others.
Next, we came to a robes shop "for all occasions" (I know it's a bad pun, but I just couldn't help myself).
When I opened the door, there was a bell at the top corner of the door that rang. Even though the bell was small itself, the ring it made was very high-pitched. I covered my ears with my hands, but no one else did. Maybe it's just the ghost in me.
A frantic looking woman came out from the window and greeted us. Her tape measures were still measuring the arms of a small boy. He looked about to faint when the tape measures flew off him to the woman's hands.
"Hello! I assume you're here for some robes?" I nodded, and she spun me over to the shop window. The two tape measures flew me over while I tried to revive the poor boy.
"Are you okay?" his eyes fluttered open when I stated that.
"Who are you?" he nervously asked.
"I'm Dani. And who are you?"
"My name is Dennis Creevey. And I'm going to Hogwarts."
"Me too." I smiled at him and he smiled back.
"My older brother Colin says that Harry Potter is at Hogwarts."
"Well, he's right. In fact, he's waiting for me over there!" I waved over to Harry and Dennis's eyes got real big.
"Woah! Wait 'till Colin hears about this!" he jumped off the stool, grabbed some robes, threw some Gallons out of his pocket, and flew out the door. Jumping for joy all along the street. I noticed that Harry looked uncomfortable and annoyed.
"Great." Harry cupped his forehead.
"Why are you so against that innocent little kid?" I protested.
"If you knew what his older brother Colin was like, you would understand."
"He's that bad, huh?"
"He's a complete stalker, in my opinion." Ron added, leaning on Harry. "Of Harry's personal life."
"Well," Sirius stepped in abruptly and rudely, rubbing his hands together, "Moving on."
"No, no," I grinned at Harry with my hand waving, "I want to know more about your little fanboy." Harry's face flushed.
"Kids," Remus said, "Dani's robes are done, so are you all just going to stand around and talk or actually do what we came here for?"
The tape measures had long flown to the back room. Now, out came the same woman from earlier, holding a folded black robe. I held out three gallons in exchange for them. We all left the shop; me carrying my slingbag across my shoulder.
On our way to the bookstore, I spied a tall building. There was certainly a lot of noise coming from inside. I gestured with my right arm.
"Hey, what's that?"
"What's what?" George asked. "Oh, that." He mumbled the second half with disgust.
"The animal emporium!" Sirius boomed. "My favorite place!"
"I thought your favorite place was Zonko's" Remus said.
"Yes, well, I have a lot of favorite places." Sirius grinned. "It depends on the day – and that includes the animal emporium."
"You do know that it's not even remotely called the 'animal emporium', right?" Harry asked suspiciously.
"So I forget names!" Sirius grumbled, "Big deal."
I started towards the door; the twins, the 'golden trio', Sirius, and Remus followed me inside. A bell rang when we entered, and I had to cover my ears – but that mostly because of the animals' sound, though. There were tons of owls squawking, some cats meowing, some frogs croaking, and even more. I thought that maybe my head would explode if I stayed in here too long. Darn, ghost hearing…
I wandered the aisles, looking at numerous animals. Finally, I found a tad quieter corner of the store. Staring at me was a black owl in a cage, with white splattered spots in random places all over its feathers. It looked at me like it hated what it was seeing. It quickly turned away to stare at the wall. What was the deal with this stupid owl?
"What's wrong with it?" Ron asked.
"I don't know," I said, "but I'm about to find out." I turned the cage around so we were facing each other. The owl just flipped directions again. It went on like that a couple times before I was just about ready to quit with this ignorant creature. Tonight, those yellow eyes would taunt me in my nightmares.
"Ok, look." I pinched the bridge of my nose to relive some of the frustration that was bubbling inside me. "It's obvious you don't like me. So why?" I looked it in the eye and stared right back. I felt my ectoplasm shifting towards my eyes, providing extra moisture, as disgusting as that sounds.
And so it began; the staring contest. Dani, the half-ghost hybrid who could "definitely win" vs. Owl, the stubborn little b*****d. We stared at each other with intense gazes. It went on like that for a while; I just knew that George was behind me, mocking me for… pretty much everyone except Hermione. Anyway, a bunch of other customers came over to watch for some reason – including the store employees. They were either cheering on me, or the owl. I didn't dare look; I was too focused.
I knew that I was going to have to get some more ectoplasm in my body after this. And if I kept going much longer, I knew my ghost half would go psychotic. So, I did the only thing to save myself from letting out my secret.
I blinked.
The crowd dispersed with a heavy heart, and me with an even heavier one. I but I needed to get through this day, and to do that I needed to forfeit. It seems pretty crazy of me to think about this so intently… I mean, I'm competing against a dumb owl.
I looked at the owl. It puffed out its chest to say, 'I know I won, and you're a loser'. Well, two can play at that game. I just needed more time to plot my revenge… Ha, ha.
I opened my slingbag and collected the handbag. I took a handful of gallons and walked to the front desk. "Will this do?" I pointed to the grumpy owl in the corner. He nodded yes, and took the coins.
"That'll do. Thank you so much for your purchase!" he used a fake happy voice.
I went back to the others. "Well, let's go."
"Whatdidyouget?Whodidyoubuy?" Sirius asked. I was a little concerned for him at this point. A fact is a fact: adults shouldn't be jumping in anticipation like a little kid waiting for a lollipop.
I pointed to the owl. His mouth dropped. In fact, so did the others' mouths. "Why?!"
"That owl's evil, I'm telling you." Ron sneered. "Don't say I didn't warn you…"
"I like him, even though he hates me." I protested. I folded one arm while the other grasped the cage handle. That owl glared at me like nothing else. I smiled at him. "He'll fit in just fine." I added some comedy to the situation.
"Are you sure about this?" Hermione whispered. She pointed to the owl. "He doesn't seem very… friendly."
"Well, I like him. I'll name him Snowy."
"Snowy?" Remus asked. "He's black."
"And white, don't forget that." George laughed. "Then again, his big beady eyes aren't snowy."
I frowned. I would get back at him later. But for now, I had an owl to investigate. I peered through the metal bars of the cage. Snowy glared back at me.
"I think he likes me."
I could bore you to tears with all the others places we went to. So I'm just going to give all the other places to you now (By the way, we also went a bit outside of Diagon Alley):
We collected all of my textbooks at a bookstore. It turned out that Clockwork had already purchased for me – that was a tall, heavy pile. Hermione cast a spell on my slingbag so that it could act like the handbag – full, yet not full yet.
Zonkos: The twins were 'head over heels' for that place. They must have searched the place from top to bottom; replenishing their pranking supplies. I bought a quill that could take notes itself – since I finally figured out that pens were not allowed at Hogwarts.
I forget the name of the fourth place we went to (Ok, fine. I wasn't paying attention. But it was a bunch of potions stuff – like a cauldron, and ingredients to chop up! Don't blame me.).
Honeydukes: I found out that I love chocolate frogs. So far, I have about 5 Dumbledores (what a coincidence…), 1 Merlin (lucky), and 1 Clockwork (you just had to invite yourself, didn't you).
Three Broomsticks: I hate butter beer! George tried to coax me to try it again, saying that I would eventually love it if I kept trying. Everyone said that it was impossible for someone to hate butter beer. Well, tell that to George, who I dumped my full glass onto.
Those are the eight places we went to… can you guess the last?
The last place we went to was Ollivander's to get me a wand – not that I needed one, of course. The others were all excited about the wand choosing – I couldn't figure out why. After all, what's so great about a wand?
The twins practically dragged me to the door of the quaint little shop. They flung open the door and pushed me inside so that I almost fell over. I would've yelled at them, but there was a creaking movement behind the desk.
The swivel chair spun suddenly so that a man was grinning at us. "Hello again. What may I do for you?" I have to admit, he almost gave me a heart attack from the creepy surprise. I shuddered.
"Dani here needs a wand." Sirius lazily said.
"Mr. Black," Mr. Ollivander replied, "Dew and dragon heartstring, 12 inches. Still working well, I presume?"
"Yeah." Sirius reassured him. (I really have no clue about what Sirius's wand was; I'm just making it up.)
"Now, Ms. Time," He said, (how did he know my name) "Hold out your wand arm."
I held up, guessing, my left and dominant arm. He took out a measuring tape and started to measure my arm. I looked over at George with a questioning expression.
He sniggered a laugh. "This is just what he does to get an idea about what length of wand you need."
Suddenly Mr. Ollivander flew towards behind his desk, mumbling things like "Mimblewimble" as he searched through the slender brown boxes. (Where do you think I got the 'Mimblewimble' from? Vernon Dursley, book 1!) Finally he tore one off the shelf.
"The wand chooses the wizard, so try this." He handed me the wand from the box, but just as soon as I touched it he snatched it back. "No, no…"
He searched even more boxes, wand after wand, for what seemed like a whole of an hour. Most likely only half that time guess. He kept repeating the words, "Tricky customer…" or "I love a good challenge!" all the while jumping for joy. I was about ready to run out the door at the next chance; I was just that bored. But I didn't – yet. Mr. Ollivander brought another box to me.
"Let's try this one;" he gasped while slowly bringing out the wand. "Blackthorn with elderwood. 9 inches." I grasped the wand lazily. But as soon as my hand touched it, there was a tingling feeling inside me. A rush of adrenaline. Like the very roots of this little stick attached to my core. At the same time, green, white, black, and blue sparks shot out the end of the wand. The brown wood color was slightly touched with a green mix.
The others stared at us like they had never seen this before. Hadn't they all felt this before, too? I was as fascinated as Mr. Ollivander was.
"Very peculiar…" he slowly added. Harry tensed up from those words. "Elderwood is, as you may know already, the wood of death." Everyone perked up at this. What was going on?
"Legend states that Death himself took black magic to make the seed of the elder tree. He then planted it near the spirt world and feed it the depths of human souls. Over time, the tree flourished and reproduced; spreading over to the magical world. Do you know of any connection to death?" I shuddered.
"N-no…" I lied hastily. George was the only one here who knew I was bluffing, hopefully.
"It's the cousin of... never mind that. However, the blackthorn is not common, either. Said to have been given from the depths of time itself. Dark, indeed."
"Uhh…" I left my voice to wander. "That's, umm, interesting…"
"Well then. That will be 5 gallons, please."
I handed him the money and rushed out the door, the others following me. I carefully put my wand up my sleeve once I reached the outside world and leaned against the brick wall. Hermione caught up to me first, surprisingly.
"I have never heard of an elder wood wand!" she exclaimed. "Very rare! Not even in any of wand lore books!"
"Wait," Ron wondered aloud, "You, of all people, have never even heard about elder wood?" He snorted, "Wow."
"And I suppose you have?"
"Yep." He proudly smiled. "The Legend of the Elder Wands."
"What?" Harry asked.
"The Legend of the Elder Wands! You know, like Babbity Rabbit and Her Cackling Stump – fairy tales." Fred added.
"Harry and I were raised by muggles." Hermione protested. "And Dani must not have heard about 'The Legend of the Elder Wands'."
"Well," Sirius explained, "The Legend of the Elder Wands goes like this. Ollivander explained the 'cousins' of the first one. The first one was supposedly created by death from an elder wood tree when a guy that had cheated Death by a bridge had forced him to. His brothers got a stone and a cloak. Pretty useless items, when you think about the fact that none of this is actually real. Just legend." (Oh, Sirius…)
"Well, I don't believe that one bit." Hermione huffed. "None of that is scientifically possible! Death; a real person? I don't think so…"
I stared at my wand. Did it really mean all of these things? Why did it choose me? Death, time, and darkness combined… I wonder.
"Don't think too much of it." George added. "Who knows what kinds of things could happen; a mind explosion perhaps?"
I nodded. I really shouldn't. I should focus on the benefits and good stuff, first. I followed the others to the Leaky Cauldron.
I threw in the handful of floo powder and closed my eyes tight. "The burrow!" I shouted into the flames. I stepped into the grate and I was gone.
Okay, so I hope that this makes up for the wait. I know I probably should have included at least a detailed page about each place they went too, but… it would get boring fast. Maybe, considering my style of writing. See you next time on The Muppet Show! And please review!