Today was one of Karkat and Dirk's weekly strifes. The two loved fighting, not because they liked inflicting pain, but due to their love of weapons. Dave didn't really get it. What was the appeal of weapons unless you really needed them? No one was is imminent danger anymore, it was highly unlikely that anyone would need to fight again. So what was the appeal?
At first he couldn't take the thought of watching the two of them. It was too much. The sound of metal on metal, the hisses from them when one smacked the other too hard. The grunts and battle cries of their war like dance. It was just too much. Dave hated letting something have that much power over him though. So, he forced himself to attend the session this week. He didn't want to fear something that clearly meant a lot to Karkat, and the look of delight on the trolls face when he asked if he could attend made it impossible to back out, even when Dave was already having second thoughts.
So, here he sits, trying not to let his discomfort show. The two were standing about ten feet apart, practicing swings and general warming up. Dirk had prepare ice packs a first aid kit in the corner. Apparently minor injuries were fairly common. When both were ready they counted down from five and began.
Sounds of metal cutting air, shuffling shoes, and the occasion clangs filled the room immediately. Shouts as they dived towards each other, weapons meeting, straining against each other. Who would back down first? To Dave's surprise, it was Dirk. Karkat took advantage of the retreat to press on with a flurry of aggressive strikes, resulting in Karkat pinning Dirk against the wall and declaring himself the winner.
Dave was doing okay, he let out a breath that he hadn't realized he had been holding in. He was also sitting on his hands, he didn't want the two to see his trembling. He was afraid of looking fragile in front of Dirk, or making Karkat worry. Allowing himself a couple of deep breaths, he forced himself up and gave his boyfriend a congratulatory high five as the troll made his way to his water bottle. Taking a long drink as Dave noticed the sweat around his brow. Looking at Dirk he realized the blonde was sweating through his shirt. Wow, this is a serious work-out for them. As soon as the duo quenched their thirst they were back in fighting stance.
The first battle must have been a warm up, because this battle was ten times more intense. There was a constant clang of metal, they were moving faster, Dave almost couldn't keep track. He was trembling again, only this time it wasn't just his hands, it was his entire body. One of them slammed against the wall near him. Flashbacks of strifes with his Bro flooded his mind's eye, he was going to be sick. Whoever had hit the wall was back up and fighting again, Dave couldn't really pay attention anymore. He felt outside himself, but still aware enough that if he didn't get to a bathroom quick he was going to puke all over the floor. Stumbling around out of the room he managed to find his way to the bathroom, locking it out of habit. He was in survival mode from his childhood again. Locking the door was the only way to be sure he wouldn't be attacked. Doing his best to hold back the bile rising in his throat he checked behind the shower curtain to make sure the demonic puppet wasn't there. Nothing, the very slight relaxation he felt was quickly swept away with the impending need to void his stomach. Retching into the toilet he was vaguely aware of the cold tile beneath him, however even his sensory perception was being taken over by his flashbacks.
Suddenly he was back in that Texas apartment. He would have to fight Bro soon, he seemed mad today. Which meant the beat down would be that much worse. Shaking hands wiped his mouth. He turned on the faucet of the sink, cupping his hands to collect the water and drinking. Quaking with the knowledge of his impending doom, Dave allowed himself to sit in the corner. There was a knock on the door, the knight clamped him hand over his mouth to keep a frightened yelp from escaping his mouth. More knocking. This isn't happening. This isn't happening. ….this isn't happening. The song. The song. There was a solemn song that Dave heard when he was about six. It always stayed with him and allowed him to calm down in moments like these. It was his favorite because he could sing it easily even when crying.
All around me are familiar faces
Worn out places, worn out faces
Bright and early for the daily races
Going nowhere, going nowhere
Their tears are filling up their glasses
No expression, no expression
Hide my head I wanna drown my sorrow
No tomorrow, no tomorrow
And I find it kind of funny
I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had
I find it hard to tell you,
I find it hard to take
When people run in circles it's a very, very
Mad world, mad world
Children waiting for the day they feel good
Happy birthday, happy birthday
And to feel the way that every child should
Sit and listen, sit and listen
Went to school and I was very nervous
No one knew me, no one knew me
Hello teacher tell me, what's my lesson?
Look right through me, look right through me
And I find it kind of funny
I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had
I find it hard to tell you,
I find it hard to take
When people run in circles it's a very, very
Mad world, mad world, enlarging your world, mad world
Deep breaths returned. Looking around he realized he was still in Dirk's bathroom and there was an insistent banging on the door. Two voices.
"Hey Dave, are you alright?"
And the more frantic, "Dave please open up! Are you okay?! What happened, talk to me!"
"I'm fine" he said "I…just need a few minutes." He couldn't go back out there with his pride still intact.
"Alright, we'll give you some space." It was Dirk, some whispered bickering could be heard before everything drifted into silence. Dave stayed there before he sneaked out and went home. He sent Karkat a text telling him where he was going, and another to Dirk, to apologize for his behavior. He didn't want to look pathetic AND bad mannered.
After the emotionally trying afternoon, all Dave could do was collapse onto him bed when he got home. Sleep overcoming him instantly.
He woke up a bit later, in a sleeping Karkat's arms.
Notes:The song is Mad World, there are a couple of versions out there, the one I was thinking of is the Gary Jules version: watch?v=4N3N1MlvVc4
There's also an awesome Postmodern Jukebox version: watch?v=aVevvbFNKiY
Two more chapters left.
ClivaMature: Embrace the Strange LOL. I'm glad you liked the Cronkri bit, I love putting in small hints to the other relationships when I can. ^-^
Hikary Sanoko: I'm glad you liked it! I hope you liked this chapter, it's the insecure Dave chap I promised!