OK I'm back. Sorry for the delay. Like I expected college got in the way. Thank you to all of you who have reviewed. I know I'm taking it slow right now, (I want all the Weasleys to have their fair share before I focus souly on Percy) but I plan on having the story speed up in the third installment. Then I will introduce some of my own characters that I'm sure you'll love/hate. DON'T FORGET TO REVIEW!

~Who wrote this crap

Well that's enough of my rambling. Now what you've all been waiting for:

Suffering

Chapter Five: Regret

Percy laid awake on his bed staring at nothing, his back turned away from the door. He was crying and he couldn't stop. He was desperately trying to gain his composure, but every time he came close to calming down the reality of his situation would hit him with full force and he would breakout into tears again. He felt pathetic and hopeless. And though his entire family was standing right outside his door longing to be with him, Percy had never felt so alone. This thought only depressed him more seeing how he had spent most of his life with no one but his own shadow.

Regrets came flooding back to him and every time he looked back on his life, he hated himself more and more for wasting it. He had wasted his life worrying about the future that he never actually too the time out to enjoy the present. He never thought that he would die this young. . . he was a fool. He truly believed that if he worked hard enough, if he kept out of trouble, and enforced what the rules said was right he would become someone great, someone everyone would respect, maybe even Minster of Magic. And when he was offered that job as Junior Assistant to the Minister of Magic he was so thrilled. It was a giant leap forward towards becoming someone important and respected; how could he have turned that down?

But none of that mattered now. It didn't matter how close he had gotten to the top, because in the end the fact remained that he had failed to get there. The worst part of it all was that no one would care that he failed, because no one had found his dreams important enough to care about. It was just another part of being alone.

Alone. The story of his life summed up into one word. He had always been alone growing up. The way he saw it his siblings had been divided into pairs; Bill had Charlie, Ron had Ginny, and the twins never needed anyone but each other. There was no one left for him- not that that mattered though. Even if there was another sibling they wouldn't want to be around him, because none of his siblings ever wanted to be around him. Often his younger siblings would play rock, parchment, scissors against each other- in which the loser would have to sit next to him at the dinner table. Those memories still upset him to this day.

So it was understandable that he believed it wasn't love, but guilt and the feeling of obligation that brought his siblings here today. The truth was none of his siblings didn't even like him. They never liked him. . . No, that wasn't completely true. There were times when they were very little that they had enjoyed each other's company; moments of love that he was sure his brothers and sister had completely forgotten about.

But even those old memories couldn't make up for the ones of recent. The ones with hate howlers screaming that he didn't deserve the name Weasley before spitting ink in his face. So, no, he didn't want to see them. He didn't want to see them pretend that they love him, or worse yet fool themselves into thinking that they cared about him.

He'd rather be left alone to mourn the life he was never going to have.

Suddenly, the door opened and closed. Percy abruptly stopped crying.

"Percy?"

"Go away, Ginny." Percy said wiping his eyes even though she could not see them.

"No."

"Leave me alone."

"No."

"Damn it Ginny, I don't what to talk to you or anyone else!"

"Too bad. I'm not going to leave you alone. You've spent enough time alone."

"I want to be left alone."

She crossed the room, stopping right in front of him. She knelt down so she face to face with him. "I don't hate you."

Percy scoffed, avoiding her gaze. "Sure you don't."

"Percy look at me when I'm talking to you!" she said in a tone so much like his mother's Percy found himself reluctantly obeying. He looked into his little sisters brown eyes. She looked determined.

"I love you." For a moment she sounded sincere and for a moment Percy almost believed her.

"Why?" he asked demandingly.

"What do you mean 'why'?" She asked taken aback. "You're my brother."

Percy looked at the ceiling. "So you love me out of obligation to our kinship." Percy concluded.

"Out of obligation to our kinship?" she sounded confused. "What's that suppose to mean?"

Percy glanced at her and sighed. "It means you 'love' me do to the simple fact that I am your brother. Nothing more and nothing less."

Ginny gaped at him. "Oh for crying out loud. Percy, would you wake up and stop making ridiculous excuses for why you should be miserable."

"They're not ridiculous excuses, they're legitimate reasons!" he insisted angrily as he sat up.

"So you've been sitting in here alone listing 'legitimate reasons' why you should be miserable?"

"Basically."

"Instead of spending what precious time you have left with the people who love you?"

Percy laugh humorlessly, "People who love me." he echoed.

"Yes, people who love you." Ginny said sounding irritated.

"You don't understand." Percy said. "The only reason you're here is because you don't want to feel guilty for making me miserable after I'm dead. You just haven't realized it yet." Percy said in a flat voice.

Ginny looked at him like he had lost his mind. "Do you hear yourself right now? Do you have any idea how ridiculous that sounds?"

"You people care more about yourselves than you do about me. So don't lie to me and tell me and tell me that there are people out there who love me. "

"You've lost your mind." she said shaking her head. "What potions have they been giving you? I want to have a talk with the Healers."

"They haven't been giving me any potions!" Percy said angrily. "Everybody's been asking me how I feel, well this is it! This is how I feel!"

They stared at each other for the longest time. Neither one of them speaking. Finally, Percy got fed up with waiting for a reply, but before he could tell her to get out, she broke the silence.

"Well then, if that's how you really feel, then I must be a terrible sister." she said coldly.

"You are to me." he told her, not caring if he hurt her feelings. Which he had a feeling he had, even though she didn't show it.

"So you hate me." she said.

"You hate me." Percy said right back.

"No I don't! Merlin, Percy haven't you been listening to a word I've been saying?" she said exasperated. "I don't hate you!"

"You certainly don't love me."

"That's not- How would you know?" she challenged him.

"Because you don't like me." Percy said.

"What?"

"You never liked me." he said. "How can you love someone you never even liked?"

She gaped at him. "Percy, there's a difference between 'like' and 'love'." she told him. "A big difference."

"And I take it you are going to try to explain to me the concept of love?"

It took her a few moments to respond. "I don't know how explain love! But I do know that if you don't know what love is by now, it's your own damn fault."

"Is it?"

"Yes!" she snapped. "Now stop trying to pin your misery on me, because I'm not the one making you miserable." she pointed at him. "You're making yourself miserable with loony ideas!"

"Would you like to leave?"

"Yes, I would!" she said stomping over to the door. She only made it halfway there before she turned around. "But I'm not going to. Not until I'm sure you know that I - don't- hate- you" she was breathing heavily. "and that you don't hate me."

The tense silence was back again. And Percy wished more than anything she would just go, but didn't know what to say to her to get her to leave. He couldn't just tell her what she wanted to hear; she wouldn't believe him. He had to do something else so he asked her something he had been wondering about for a while.

"How did you know there were Death Eaters in the Department of Mysteries? And why on Earth would you go down there?"

His question caught Ginny off guard. "We went down there to rescue someone, a friend."

"But how did you know where this friend was or that they needed rescuing?"

Harry had a dream that You-Know-Who was in the Department of Mysteries and he was torturing our friend.

"He had a dream...?" Percy couldn't believe what he was hearing. "So now Harry's a Seer?"

"No, he has some sort of connection with You-Know-Who." she explained. "Harry can see what he sees in his dreams. So when he dreamt that Si- our friend was being tortured he had to rescue him, and we came with him. But it turned out that You-Know-Who had messed with Harry's dream, so even though in the dream he saw our friend being held captive in the Department of Mysteries, our friend wasn't actually there... Percy? Are you okay?

Percy was staring at her, unable to speak. He had thought..maybe a Death Eater had sent Harry … a note of some sort... never did he think that...

"I'm dying," Percy said slowly. "because Harry Potter had a nightmare?"

Ginny was at loss for words. "It's not that simple!" she tried to explain desperately. "It's not Harry's fault! You-Know-Who tricked him! . . . Percy? . . ." she waved a hand in front of his face. "Percy say something..."

But the shock of this revelation was too overwhelming for Percy. He just sat there stunned. He could hardly think. He was dying because Harry Potter had a nightmare. Percy couldn't wrap his head around it. It was just so. . .

"It's not fair." Percy said numbly. "Why do I have to die? I didn't do anything wrong. . . did I?"

He looked at his sister. She looked like she was going to cry. But she didn't. She swallowed and took a seat on the foot of his bed. She put a warm hand on his cold hand. "No, Percy, you didn't do anything wrong."

Percy pulled his hand away. "Then why am I being punished! Why am I-" he couldn't finish, his throat had closed up. His face was burning and his vision was becoming clouded with tears that threatened to fall from his eyes. He quickly wiped them away.

"It's not fair." he whispered hoarsely.

"No, it isn't." she said softly. She was crying too, now. She put her hand on his. This time he didn't pull away.

She wrapped her arms around him like their mother would have done. And whispered into his ear.

"Thank you for coming after us."

Percy swallowed the lump in his throat.

"I don't hate you, Ginny." he whispered back.

"I love you, Percy" she told him, but Percy was already asleep.