Chapter 2: Cups of Coffee

"I'll wait, I'll wait
I love you like you've never felt the pain,
I promise you don't have to be afraid,
The love is here and here to stay,
So lay your head on me.
Little do you know
I know you're hurting while I'm sound asleep,
All my mistakes are slowly drowning me,
I'm trying to make it better piece by piece.
Little do you know,
I love you 'til the sun dies" - Alex & Sierra

Clarys POV - 5 Years Ago [2010]

I can feel his hands clutch me tight as our bodies grind against each other on the dark, hot, dance floor.

Sure, I had a couple of drinks but I'm not wasted.

My hand ran back up behind his neck and I can feel his face burry into my own. His blonde curls are soft under my touch, and as the bass pumps louder, I grind my ass against him teasingly rough.

Hearing him growl against my ear only turns me on. I'm glad for the crowded, dark club because I'm pretty sure I gasped loudly when he started nipping my neck.

"You're leaving with me tonight " I hear him say huskily.

Turning around in his arms, I smirked at the golden man and slightly tip toed to crash our lips.

I can't deny it, he's the hottest man in this club. And hell, he was the most beautiful man I've ever seen. He was just as golden as the Greek gods, his eyes, skin, hair, all gold.

The way he lead my body to dip perfectly, held me, kissed me was enough to have my head spinning.

The bass to Down On Me only grew louder, and the deepness of our kiss caused goosebumps throughout my body.

I can feel his lips curve into a smirk and I inwardly groan as he bites my bottom lip.

Jace POV - Present [2015]

I didn't realize my parents place was crowded when I entered. I blinked at their sleeping bodies laid all over the living room floor.

"JACEEEE!" I hear, and Max is suddenly on my back. "Max." I laugh as I still hold the box carefully in my arms. "You didn't come last night so we opened presents without you. Only mom's here but she stayed in her office all night … What's that?" he asks as he slides off me.

I pursed my lips as I walk over to the table quietly since Izzy, Alec, Simon, and Magnus are still asleep, "It's a gift from Clary."

"You finally went huh? I knew you wouldn't have missed out on Christmas without a perfectly good reason. So.. what's in it?"

"Well.." I trailed off. I remembered never taking my eyes off her since she fell asleep. Brushing the scarlet baby hairs on her temple as I thought about the hours before. The pain in her eyes was something I wasn't able to handle. I don't think I could ever forget them.

I just knew that I was going to make damn sure I would never hurt her like that again. I was thankful for this second chance and I don't plan on wasting it, I will never take her for granted. She weighed less than I remembered, or maybe it's just been that long.

When she woke up, we stayed in that position and talked for a while. But by 9, her doorbell rang and her eyes went wide as she muttered 'shit', "Clary hired a guy in a Santa suit to deliver it as a joke. She forgot about it and apparently had this gift delivery planned 3 months ago", I told Max as I recalled the events of how it completely caught me off guard.

"NO FUCKING WAY! Dude! This is all new." I nod with astonishment to Max's words as I took out all the MMA training gear, revealing at the bottom of the box a new suitcase. Fuck. I didn't think she would've gotten me all of this.

I swallowed back the vile of saliva down my throat. It wasn't that the gift disgusted me or anything. I just hated myself more every time I looked at it. I don't deserve this.

The things she got me had summed me up to a perfect T. It's not just things that I've wanted, but things that I needed. And knowing that she planned this ahead of time just makes me feel guilty as fuck.

I watched Max remove the suitcase out of the box, regretting that I didn't give her anything in return. I turned around when I heard Simon groan awake, "You guys do know you suck at keep your voices down, right?"

As I opened my mouth to retort back, Max let's out a whistle, "Jace, she even stuffed the suitcase!" My eyes widen as I turned the open suitcase towards my direction. "You don't deserve her you know", Simon says beside me as he rubs the dust off his eyelids and slides his glasses on.

I hated how I couldn't help but tighten my jaw at his statement, the rat boy was absolutely right. I don't.

Jace's POV - 5 Years Ago [2010]

I heard my sheets ruffle and felt them tug and move. I open my eyes to see a redhead looking under my sheets. Leaning onto my side, I place my head into my palm and slightly cough, "Need some help there?"

Her face was priceless, her eyes were as wide as a deer caught in highlights. I watched her tug her bottom lip between her teeth. I let my eyes roam and realized she's already dressed and her face was just clear. Clear, freshly washed.

I've woken up to many girls with owl eyes, or washed but clearly added more makeup or something. And no offense to girls, but when that shit gets on my sheets, it's pretty hard to wash. Which is why I rarely brought girls home.

"Sorry I just couldn't find something, but I think i'll be fine without it. I didn't mean to wake you." She said as she tucked her hair, slowly standing up. She was still in her short skirt and top when she bent over to get her purse.

I quickly tugged on boxers, getting up fast. "Leaving so soon Red?" I ask, with a face like hers, I don't think no guy would let her leave, especially dressed like that. I mean, she was fucking hot even without that makeup shit on.

"Not everyone has the pleasure to sleep in", she said leaning against the door frame. I raise my brow and give her my infamous smirk that swoons every girl off their feet. My hands plant themselves on her waist as I pin her against the wall. I bend and start placing kisses on her bare shoulder, my eyes peering up to her closed ones.

Kissing my way up her neckline, I whisper in her ear "C'mon. Stay, just a little bit longer." I nibbled her ear, recalling that she was weakened by it, "Please Clary?"

I can tell she was surprised that I remembered her name by the way she let out a soft gasp when I said it. I kissed up her jawline, taking my time to get to her lips. Fuck they were soft. Before I get the chance to deepen the kiss, she slowly pulls away, her head leaning back.

Her green eyes were so bright as she stared up at me, giving me a sheepish yet apologetic smile, "Sorry, but I can't skip out on college. I'm already late as it is."

Sexy with a goal of a degree. Damn. I let my arms drop because I respect her honesty. "Do you want to at least borrow a sweater?" I say, and we oddly glanced at the window at the same time.

Her lips turn up to a smirk, "You just want to give me a reason to see you again don't you?" I shrug, I'm not really sure why I offered, but I would assume no girl would want to go to class with yesterday's clothes.

Going to my cabinet to grab one of my rarely used sweaters, I spot something dark from the corner of my eye. Once I grab a sweater, I reach over at the item and smirk, turning back around to her.

"Was this the thing you were looking for?", I asked as a dark red thong hung from my fingers.

Clary's pale cheeks turned bright pink as she reached for it, giving me a cheeky smile before slipping it on.

She was planning to leave without underwear. Fuck, she's so tempting.

"Thank you again, I guess I'll see you around", with that said, she tiptoed and kissed the side of my neck. Not what I was expecting, but I definitely didn't complain.

"Bye Jace."

Present [2015]

Jace was perched on the couch, his elbows against his knees - which was bouncing hastily - with his thumbs writing texts to Clary, but then instantly erasing it over and over again.

"Just send it already", Isabelle said as she placed a cup of hot chocolate in front of him. He just muttered a thanks as he reached for it and took a sip, his eye never leaving his screen. Suddenly, an awful choking noise escapes his throat and he's spitting it back into the cup, his phone tossed to the side.

"What the fuck Iz! I thought Magnus was making the hot chocolates" Jace exclaimed, his face contorted as he glanced at Isabelle and back into the cup.

The dark haired fashionista rolled her eyes as she looked at her nails, "well he's busy in Alec's room doing God knows what. I just thought I was doing everyone a favor by doing it myself." Taking a big gulp from her own cup, she said "I don't get what's wrong with it."

Jace snorted and looked at her as if she were crazy, "As you can see, i'm trying to get Clary back. Killing me now isn't doing me a favor." He placed the cup back on the living room table. "Besides, how can you fuck up with hot chocolate? You had one job Izzy. All you had do is follow the damn directions on the back. Warm milk and put in the mix. Whatever you made could bring Frankenstein back to life and want to die .. again" Jace muttered.

"Oh, Fuck You Jace!"

"Yeah, no thanks. That would be disgusting, besides, the world already has-", Jace never got to finish his sentence as Isabelle watched his face turn from confident to … scared?

"I have to take this." And just like that, he left.

He swiped his phone to accept the call, the call he wasn't expecting so soon. He wanted to say so much, he wanted to tell her everything that he had typed, everything that he forgot to say on their first encounter back, but all he could breathe out was "Clary".

Clary's POV Present Day - 4 days later - December 29, 2015

My stomach fluttered when I caught a glimpse of Jace sitting at a booth. It's as if he doesn't even have to look at me to make me feel like this. I can't help but realize he's wearing the black v-neck sweater that i've gotten him a while ago. He knows how much I like to see him wearing it. He looks casually sexy in it.

Well, he looks hot in mostly anything really. Agh, subtle Clary, subtle.

"Excuse me, are you going in or not?", some blonde asked behind me. "Yeah, sorry", I muttered and opened the door to the café. Maybe this wasn't a good idea, to have this conversation in public. There were some things that I forgot to mention to him, things that might change his mind about me.

"Clary!" His own bright grin made me smile just as wide, I nodded and headed over to his booth. He was standing, his posture unsure of how to greet me, but I was pretty unsure as well. Oh, fuck it.

I went in for the hug, and he chuckled under my touch. His own arms tight and firm around me. I can feel a chill crawl up my spine when I felt his breath tickle my ear. His hands stayed just a bit longer on me after my hands dropped.

I can smell the scent of his moroccan myrrh shaving cream mixed with his cologne as we pulled away. Taking a seat across from him, he hands me a cup that smells oh so heavenly. "Thanks, you didn't have to".

He shrugged, the ends of his lips slightly corked into a half smile, "I wanted to. Besides, it's cold outside and your cheeks are flushed."

I pursed my lips and felt my cheeks, sure they were cold, but I could guess that they just turned darker shade from that comment. I gladly drank the hot cup of coffee, a satisfied noise slipping.

His hand ran through his blonde curls as he coughed, "Look Clary. Thanks for the gift. You really didn't have to get me all that. I don't deserve those g-"

I shook my head, "Don't worry about it. They still belonged to you regardless of what had happened". He bit his own lip, and I sighed, I know he's holding back. This shouldn't be awkward, but I guess, I expected it to get more awkward towards what I came here to tell him and not this fast.

"I'm sorry, this wasn't how I wanted our reunion to go", he said as his hand reached for my own. My eyes widen as I looked at our hands, I mean i'm not complaining, his hands are absolutely warm. But, it's just still too soon right?

"The gift was perfect Clary. Thank you. I've been wanting to talk to you since Christmas, but I didn't know how much space you needed." I unconsciously bit the corner of my lip and nodded for him to continue.

"I want you back. I've miss you, a lot. Everything about you. Your paint splattered face, your unbelievable times of hunger, you singing when you make your special pancakes, your sarcastic remarks, your laugh, your lips. Everything."

"When I was trying to text you, I was unsure of how to say what I wanted to say. I was unsure if I should cry or smile because of this second chance. I was unsure if you wanted to go back to the way we were before .. I- ... this whole ordeal." He stops. I can tell he avoided the word proposal.

"I want us to be US again."

I stayed silent and replayed his words. He wants to be us again. To just two people who was together without a label.

That's.. that's just not enough.

Sighing, I looked back up to his golden worried gaze and slightly coughed. Well, I guess it's time to break my news to him.

"Jace, I -", his brows knit together and he immediately sat straight up. I can tell his leg is shaking under the table as he gives me his full attention.

This was scarier than I thought. I glanced down and gulped, "Look. When you left, I felt hurt even though for some reasons I shouldn't have felt hurt. You leaving made me realize that I was done fooling around. What we had was nice Jace, but we got close. Closer than we should have. And whatever we had didn't have a label. That's the problem."

I looked back at up to him, my once hot coffee no longer showed steam. "I wanted more Jace, I want more. Someone to call me theirs and them mine. Someone that I know wouldn't see other people because they're happy with just being with me and only me. You kissing someone else made me angry, but yet I had no right to be."

His gaze was deep and his posture didn't change, his leg did stop shaking however, but the way he looked at me, his golden eyes were more intense.

"When you left, I promised myself to never have what we had. To have something good for myself, someone. Commitment, official. I-", again he reaches for my hand, catching me off guard.

"Jace.."

He licks his lips before he speaks, "Clary. I get it, I do. And I'm will to do that, be the guy you need. I've never been in an official relationship before, nor gave commitment to someone. But I can promise you I won't see anyone else, kiss anyone else but you. I want to be with you."

His lips curled into a gentle smile, the kind that makes you want to hug something warm and tight and know it's going to be alright.

"I want to be all yours and you all mine. I want you."

Fuck.

Fuckity, fuck fuck.

For the third time today, I sighed heavily and shook my head. Slowly putting my hand away and sitting as far back as I can. It's now or never.

"You left. I waited and waited and waited. Since Magnus told me you didn't want to talk to me, I was sure that was it. That, that was the end of us." I can see the wheels turning in his head as he understands my words.

I looked at him sternly, no emotion, no regret, "A week before you saw me, I made a decision and started seeing someone."

I can tell he's angry, his white firm knuckles say it all against the brown coffee table. His beautiful jaw tightened and his lips are pursed in a firm line. My throat sudden feels dry as I continue on, "It's all knew, a fresh start. We both went in wanting something serious-".

"So you've moved on. That's why you said we needed to talk because you already have someone else", he cut me off bluntly. His face was filled with anger now, he didn't bother to hide his expressions. But I couldn't continue with him being angry. It wasn't that I was scared or anything, it's just .. I felt guilty. "You replaced me", was all he said.

I shook my head no, "I needed a distraction, a fresh start from that horrible night. I know what you're thinking, how could I move on so fast. But could you blame me? I just wanted to feel wanted, needed. I was depressed for three weeks. Three weeks of feeling nothing but numbness. If Simon didn't come over everyday I don't think I would've eaten anything at all."

My voice was hoarse, I struggled to speak without wanting to draw too much attention to us, "You broke me Jace. And I hated that. You weren't even mine and I gave you the power to break me so easily. That's why I tried to move on. I needed you out of my head because there was no point in even thinking that we could fix us. And don't say I didn't try. I called Jace. I tried."

I didn't notice the cup of coffee in my hands, the still warm cup was enough to soothe me in the busy cafe. Minutes passed as we stayed silent. Now he knew. He wasn't angry anymore, but he managed to do that thing with his face. Hiding I mean. Completely expressionless and difficult to read.

I just cradled the cup and sat further back into the booth. My own lips can't help but quirk into a small smile when I down the liquid. I shouldn't be smiling in a time like this. But, just drinking this as I sit here brings me into a haze of nostalgia. It brings me back to when it became my favorite kind of coffee.

My mahogany colored fingernails drummed against the marbled counter as we sat and waited for the water to boil. I watched as he reached open my cabinets and reached for the mugs. He chuckles as he places them right beside me, the beautiful sound was soft and deep, "I think your mug collection is one of a kind."

"You know you like it, you always pick the same mug for your coffee anyway", I stick my tongue out as I refer to the mug with the cat holding up it's middle fingers saying 'I do what I want'. Just as I was about to hop off the counter, he leaves his hand up and fetches the instant coffee, sugar and milk.

I enjoy the tightening of his bare muscles as he carries all three items back, placing them beside the mugs. Nodding, I mutter a thank you and twist the top of the glass jar and measure out our preference of coffee powder.

Goosebumps crawl up my leg as his hands slide up and down my thighs. I turn my head to retort at his grabby hands but his eyes are fixated on my own hands. "You look VERY concentrated. Almost as if we are diffusing a bomb. Would you like to make the coffee?", I snickered.

Jace chuckled but actually nod. To my surprise, his hands slid off my thighs and took control of the coffee making. I mean, I never took it seriously but, he was very into making mine. Just in time, the kettle whistles and he pours " and viola", he says proudly. Handing me the mug, I took it questionably as his eyes fixate on me.

"You didn't poison this, did you?" I joke, watching him take a sip of his own. "No, I just hope I made it right", he said with excitement fixated in his eye.

Personally I love my coffee black, however I didn't have the heart to tell him. My mug wasn't too light, there was milk in it, but I didn't really mind.

Taking a sip, it wasn't bad at all really. It's was sweet and warm, a different kind of sweet and warm that I'm used to, but I can't complain.

"So? Did I get it right?" He asked, his mug was back down on the counter, completely empty. His smile was wide as he looked up at me. I couldn't tell him that's not how I make it.

However this is something I'm okay with drinking, "It's actually better than I thought it would be. Not bad Herondale, not bad at all." I snicker as he comes back between my legs, lips quirked to a grin as he whispers on my lips, "I knew it."

"I still have a chance", he muttered softly, breaking me out of my flashback. My eyes narrowed at his words, unsure if I heard what I think I heard, "What?"

"I still have a chance", he said more firmly. My lips parted and he spoke before I got the chance to, "You said you tried to move on. You're still not over me … are you?"

I gulped unconsciously and looked back down at my empty cup, am I? My lips were dry and parted as I tried to say yes, but even the lie wouldn't come out so I just let it shut.

His hands ruffle his golden blond curls, letting out a dry cough as he asks, "Is he good to you? The other guy I mean."

I nod and shift in my seat, "Yeah. Yeah he is, he knows about you. And that you stayed the other night too." Jace gave a tight smile as I played with my thumbs, this couldn't get anymore awkward than it is now.

Silence consumes us again.

"I'm going to fight for you" he says. I didn't notice how he made the space between us smaller, leaning on the table as close as he can get. "I know I don't deserve another chance with you, but you're all I think about Clary. I know you're with someone but it's still new and as much as you don't want to admit it, I know you feel the same."

"He treats you right, and I can too, even better. I swear i'll make it worth it Clary."

Before I can process everything he's said, yet alone get a single word out, he grabs his jacket and stands. He kisses my forehead softly and long, I can feel him smile against my skin, "I'll see you soon Red."

Shit. What the hell did I get myself into?

AN:/ I know, where the hell have I been? Well, college is time consuming. However, I think it's best that it takes a while for me to update because its worth 8 to 9 pages per update. So I did read reviews, i'm sorry if I haven't responded, but I did take some things into consideration like throwing in a competition for Jace. And in future chapters I will include more family details through flashbacks. Tell me what you like and what you don't and what you would like to see?

Recommendation of the Day: Author - NewmanYHC
This author is a good detailed read. Many of the stories are cute Clace and its long which I find lovely. Especially the one shots.

PS: I made an instagram [ohsnapitzcat] page for this story so you can see how I picture these characters if you're interested, and for those who don't have that, there's also a Pinterest page but I have to make it public first. And I know some would think of the tv show Shadowhunters. Like many I think it's OKAY, but I just don't like the script, Clary is more cocky than Jace, and he is more sweet, but I blame the writers. Not the actors. Well maybe Kat McNamara, sometimes. Her(Clary) actions agitate me. Still blame the authors. Also, did anyone try to get their friends to watch it? I found that people who haven't read the series are less likely to watch it... That malec kiss though.

- Ciao, Cait.