"Alrighty, you guys ready or what?" Roy asked as Wally finally got into the car.

"Yeah! Car-knee-vals are the greatest! Funnel cake, cotton candy, corn dogs, ice cream, popsicles-"

"ALRIGHT we get it, Kid Mouth," Dick interrupted Wally from the roof of the car. "PS, what's a 'car-knee-val?'"

"You can't even talk Language... um... Butcherer," Wally stuck his tongue out at him.

"I'm just glad I finally have my license," Roy paused. "Ready guys?"

"Yepperoni!" Wally exclaimed.

"Seriously, dude? Yepperoni?"

"What, you can butcher the English language and I can't?"

"Yes."

"So not asterous dude. Alright then. Forward, HO!" Wally shouted, pointing ahead of them.

"Seriously dude, just... Just don't," Dick told him as he climbed back onto the roof of the car. It was his favorite way to travel, the wind in his hair, the sunset giving the buildings a beautiful shadow, it was usually gorgeous.

"Here we go!" Roy laughed joyfully as he rammed his foot into the gas.

Sadly, this would not be a usual time.

They sped off, and Dick was hanging onto the sunroof as much as he could while screaming his head off as Wally screamed from inside the car.

"ROY! SLOW DOWN!" Dick shouted, but he couldn't be heard over the wind... And Wally's little girl screaming.

"ROY WATCH OUT FOR THE OLD LADY! AND THAT DOG!" Wally pointed.

"Agh!" Roy turned the wheel, causing the car to tilt on the left, successfully avoiding both the lady and the dog.

They got to Smoler and 35th street where, sadly, there were a bunch of twists and turns. Luckily, it was a very rural area, but that didn't stop Wally from holding on to the OSB (Oh Shit! Bar) while yelling at Roy to stop the car.

Meanwhile, on top of the car, Dick was swinging left and right and diagonal and upside down.

Eventually, they were off the road in the middle of a cornfield where the corn was super high and obscured Roy's vision.

When they finally got out of the corn, they were headed straight for the wall of a farmhouse.

"ROY! THE BREAKS! NOW! DO IT NOW!" Wally and Dick shouted in unison, though Dick couldn't hear Wally and Wally couldn't hear Dick.

Roy slammed the break, stopping three feet away from the farmhouse.

"aaaaaAAAAAGH!" Dick shouted as he went flying off the car. He hit the farmhouse at full speed.

"Olgh," he groaned, falling onto the ground and leaving a starfish imprint on the farmhouse.

Back at the car, both Roy and Wally flinched as Dick hit the farmhouse. Wally opened the door, fell out, and puked his guts up.

"Roy..." Wally said as he finished, wiping vomit from the corners of his mouth. "Get away from the gas petal."

Roy shakily removed his hands from the steering wheel and got out of the car. He got down on his hands and knees and kissed the Earth beneath his feet, thanking the Lord that they were still alive.

Well, maybe.

They went up to the farmhouse to find Dick on the ground, arms crossed and batglaring at Roy.

It actually looked quite painful.

"You," he whispered hoarsely, pointing at Roy. "Come here."

Roy bent down close and put his ear to Dick's mouth.

Dick took in a shaky breath before- "YOU DO NOT EVER DRIVE AGAIN!"

"Yeah," Roy replied, sheepishly rubbing the back of his neck.

"Dude, how'd you even pass your drivers test?" Wally asked, waving his arms in the air for emphasis.

"Well, the teacher's exact words were, 'If I fail you, will you be coming back to take the test again?' to which I nodded and she told me I was only passing because she wasn't ready to meet Death yet," At this, he received confused looks from the two boys. "It was a really weird lady!"

Dick tried to sit up painfully, and with the help of Wally and Roy, succeeded.

"Alright, here's how this is gonna go. Wally, you're driving me to the Manor, and Roy, you will explain this to Bruce and Alfred when we get there. Understand?"

The other two nodded.

"Good. Roy," Dick said, opening his arms. "Carry me to the car?"

Roy, scoffed, but picked him up anyways.

*TS*

"And that's what happened to Dick, why Wally has puke all over his shirt, and why Wally was driving instead of me, the 'responsible' adult."

Barry, Alfred, and Bruce milled over this for a minute.

"Please don't call GA," Roy pleaded.

"Oh, it isn't him I'd be worried about," Bruce said, smirking.

A bat smirking is never a good thing.

"Then who?"

"Me," Roy whipped around, coming face-to-face with Black Canary.

"Oh, sh- ow ow ow," Roy protested as she dragged him to the car by his ear.

The end. Idk what to do with myself because now I have like a million ideas and so just yeah don't try to stop me it's FUTILE HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

okay but it's also late so night.