"Too Long Gone"

As you probably already know, The Host by Stephanie Meyer is not my work of literature. I only based a fan fiction off of her book. No characters belong to me.

I had just finished with my chores for the morning. I watered the plants, made soap (which made my hands an irritated, angry red), took a bath, and helped in the kitchen a little with Wanda. It was so unusual to not hear her in my head. It was like Siamese twins being taken apart after months. It was very different, but I was happy that I could be with Jared now, and Wanda could be with Ian. I definitely would not have been happy if Wanda had decided to die. I would never forgive Doc or myself. I was happy with how everything worked out. I was just trying to sort out my emotions and get back on my roll.

I met up with Jared and Jamie in the cafeteria, and I made small talk with them. I haven't been the same since Wanda was in me. When I talk with my family things were a little bit awkward; I was more cautious and awkward with my speech, like my mouth wasn't mine. Jamie and Jared noticed this, but they understood, so they didn't say anything about it. I'd re-familiarize myself with my family again, I knew I would, I had to. Jared and I haven't made love yet, and I was getting nervous that he didn't want me. He wouldn't even kiss me! A real kiss, not a peck on the lips, forehead, or cheek before he awkwardly strode off to do his chores. I would fix this, I had to.

That night, my sleeping arrangements didn't change at all since I got back. I slept on the bed and Jared slept on the floor. I got in an argument with him the first night when he refused to let me sleep on the floor when I offered or when I said that we could both fit on the twin-size mattress together. Jared thought he would crush me and that I would be uncomfortable. I later told Jeb about this, and he promised me that on the next raid, we would pick up more mattresses. In my stubbornness, I refused to let him sleep on the floor and me on the bed. So, I slept on the hard floor with my semi-comfortable pillow. The next morning, I was bunched up on the mattress, and Jared was on the hard, cold ground, sleeping on his side. The next night, I went straight to the mattress, because I didn't want Jared to have to wait until I fell asleep to put me on the mattress.

The next day, I was getting ready for my chores when I took off my sleeping clothes to put on my work ones, and Jared turned around. This baffled me. Did he just want to be respectful or did he not want to see my new scars and bruises. I didn't know, but it still hurt me. He'd seen it all before, nothing had changed, had it? Jared then got dressed while I went to brush my teeth. We went to breakfast, had more small talk with Wanda and Ian, and then went our separate ways. The next week went the same. Jared still wouldn't look me in the eyes. It was starting to really worry me.

Saturday, a meeting was called. The meeting entailed nothing new, but there was going to be another raid. I would naturally go, since I've been going to every one since I got back. After the soccer game, where I just watched because I was still shy, and Doc told me to take it easy with my healing foot, everyone, including Jared left for dinner, so I went quietly with them.

After dinner, Jared washed up and then I did the same. I walked back into the room in my sleep clothes just as Jared put his sleep shirt over his toned, golden back. I gaped at his now-covered back for what seemed too little, until he noticed that I was already back. He turned around very fast and then, just as suddenly, his face turned very worried-looking and sympathetic. I didn't understand why he looked at me that way until he walked towards me and took his long, rough finger and wiped away wetness that apparently gathered on my face. He then looked me in the eyes and said with a very small voice, "Don't cry Mel, I'm here now, you're here now. Everything's okay." A sob broke through my lips, and I whimpered out, "Then why do I feel even lonelier than I did when I was with Wanda?" He looked taken aback by that, and he looked down in shame. I never felt worse than I did in that moment.

The next thing he said was, "I'm trying to give you space for the moment so you can figure out your place in here, and your place with me." In a start, I squeaked out, "What?" Jared said, "I want you to be able to get comfortable in here." I nodded my head through his statement, but then shook my head and said, "No, the other part." "Your place with me?" Jared asked. "Yes", I croaked out. I was trying to hold on to my emotions and not fall apart. Was Jared trying to say he didn't want to be with me? My tears started running down my oval face faster than before. Jared noticed this and looked scared. He asked me, "Did I hurt you in some way? What did I do wrong?" I kept crying, but I finally croaked out, "You don't want to be with me anymore?" Jared's face relaxed and he answered, "Of course I do, I just want to make sure you still want to be with me."

I nearly jumped with surprise. I answered quickly, "Of course I do, why you would think I wouldn't want to be with you?" Jared looked down in shame again and answered, "I thought you wouldn't love me anymore for being so mean to Wanda and, apparently, you when both of you first came here." I stared him straight in the eyes and stated, "What you did to us was wrong, but you made up for it and apologized. You also didn't know that I was in there and that Wanda was the way she is. Jared Howe, I will never stop loving you no matter what you or anyone else does. I love you with all my heart and all my being, and that will never change." Jared looked me in the eyes and whispered, "I love you so much Melanie Stryder, and I will never let anyone separate us again."

He the crashed his full lips against mine with such intensity that I gasped, and he took that as an advantage. He slid his tongue into my mouth and sucked out my entire soul with that movement. I then started playing this game that he started. I twirled my tongue around his and made him gasp. After minutes, we finally separated because we both needed air. We both stood there gasping for air, staring at each other with desire still burning in our eyes. After we had enough air, he crushed me against the wall and moved his artful hands from my cheeks to play with my hair. I did the same. I liked to tug at it and hear him gasp and exhale in my mouth. He then increased his fire. He was already burning me up, and he knew it. I was doing the same to him. He slowly moved his hands to my neck, then slid down to my collarbone, then finally got to my breasts. He rested his palms on them for a second, and then started his art. While he was teasing my nipples from the over my bra and shirt, I slid my hands down to his toned back and massaged his tense muscles from above his shirt.

After we couldn't take the desire anymore, we pushed off each other. He took my shirt off, and then I stripped him of his. We kept our underwear on. The only thing left on us was our underwear, and we gaped at each other for a while. We finally clawed at each other, and Jared guided us to the twin mattress. He fell on top of it, with me on top of him. He groaned as I squirmed around so I could look into his eyes. He looked back at me and then grabbed my neck to lean me down, and started kissing me again. As he did this, he flipped us over so I was on the bottom and he was on the top.

He then trailed kisses down my neck, to my collarbone, and then finally to the top of my breast. He looked at me from where he was, and then moved his mouth on top of my breast. I took in a great gasp, and he laughed quietly while still sucking, licking, nipping, and teasing. He moved his hand down from my neck to my other breast. He started pulling at my nipple and rubbing it softly. I moaned even more and even louder. Finally, when Jared had finished, he stopped, and just sat there. He was waiting for me. I pounced on him and I started kissing him violently. I then slid down his body to where his underwear was. He looked at me questioningly, and I nodded.

He got off his underwear, and I put his large dick in my hand. I stroked the top of it slightly, and his dick tingled. I laughed and he groaned. After that, I put his dick in my mouth. I moved my tongue around his dick, and he groaned so loud, a muffled laugh came from me and vibrated his dick. He groaned again. I would've gone on with this, but then Jared couldn't take anymore, so he grabbed me, and flipped us over. He started kissing me, and pulling my underwear off at the same time. Finally, he reached for something beside the bed. He grabbed the condom, tore it, and put it on. We didn't want any more mouths to feed in this cave.

He put the condom on his dick, and I watched. After he was done, I was still watching, and he looked up and laughed. Bastard. He then pounced on me, kissed my neck, and grabbed my breast. His dick tingled at my entrance. I moaned and pushed against it. He groaned. In one sudden motion, he pushed his dick into my entrance, and both of us groaned.

I rolled us over, and started riding him. He groaned many times, and I moaned many times also. We started off slow, but then it picked up. We were moving faster than before, with any sense of a pattern long lost. He flipped me over, and got on top. I moaned as he did this. He looked so magnificent in that moment, I almost came right there. But then Jared picked up the speed. It surprised me so much; I forgot what I was just thinking. I knew my climax was close, and I could tell Jared was close too. I drifted out in focus, and all I could hear was our skin slapping against each other, and our ragged breathing. Finally, I came. Mine was between a moan and a scream. Jared came with me. His was a loud, masculine groan.

As we finished coming, and he pushed in those last thrusts to let it hinder. We both whispered, "I love you." We fell asleep like that, together, just after Jared threw his used condom away. The next day, we each woke up, made love once more, and then got ready. Before we left our room, he pushed me against the wall, and kissed me passionately once more, just to make sure my lips would be tingling for the rest of the day. At breakfast, I was my usual self. It was like old times. Jared and I would joke with Jamie, while Jamie would laugh his head off. Jared would look at me once in a while and just stare. He hugged me against his side. Then I remembered, that day was the raid.

After breakfast, Jared and I got ready for the raid together. We made love once more, and then we went on our way. We met Ian and Wanda at the loading dock. Jared and Ian gave each other manly nods, and I hugged Wanda. Then, we went to the trucks. Ian and Wanda were in one, and Jared and I were in another. The raid was easy. Wanda just went into the stores, got the stuff, then came back out and we loaded the stuff into the trucks. We went from store to store doing this. When I saw Wanda bring out a mattress, a big smile spread across Jared's and my face. We looked at each other, and then he kissed me. We were blocked by trees, so nobody could see us.

After the three day raid, we came back and everything was the same. People welcomed us back with cheers and a feast of perishable items. We hugged Jamie lots of times, and Jared and I kissed many times. Everything was well. Jared and I were together and happy. Wanda was happy and with Ian. Jamie was always happy, and even more so, since everyone else was. My family was happy, and so was I.

This is my first fan fiction ever and I'd love reviews and recommendations. I loved writing this, thanks for reading it!

Lots of Love, Ms. DeanLover