This one was so much fun. It also serves as a request as well as one I just really wanted to do. Double whammy! lol Enjoy!
Judy opens her eyes to a black world. Slowly the streets of Zootopia fade into existence, but there is no life there. It is eerily quiet and her ears stand on end as a sense of terrible wrongness grips her like a vice. She creeps along, ever alert for even the tiniest movement. She jumps and fumbles for her gun as she notices someone ahead of her. In the next instant she recognizes the color and shape and lets out a heavy sigh. A smile softens her face. "Nick…"
Nick turns to face her, his trademark smirk plastered across his face.
Then it shatters. A shot splits the air and Judy jumps in her skin. Her heart leaps into her throat and her fear returns with a vengeance. What the hell…? Her gaze refocuses on Nick and the smirk has fallen. Pure terror twists his face and shock clouds his eyes.
Judy trembles in place. She is afraid to look – screams at herself not to – but her gaze drifts down and see what she knew was already there. Blood spills from a wound in his chest and in the next instant he crumples before her eyes. "Nick!" She rushes forward. She has to get to him. She has to put pressure on the wound.
No matter how much she runs, she can't get any closer. Her panic spikes and she picks up her pace, but when she does that it gets even worse. He grows farther and farther away. "No! Stop it!" She screams at the sky. This makes no sense. Angry tears well in her eyes. Please, she just wants to get to him.
Nick coughs up blood and curls in on himself as he convulses in a pool of quickly spreading blood.
Judy gasps and pulls up hard as another figure materializes just in front of him. Bellwether.
"Should've stayed on the carrot farm, huh?" Bellwether's voice echoes in this empty world – the same words as all those months ago. "Now because you didn't, he has to die." She makes an expression of mock sadness. She turns her gun on him, pointing it right at his head.
"No!" The crack of gunfire splits the air and with a jolt she awakens, sitting straight up in bed. Her heavy breathing shudders in and out of her and her whole body trembles. Tears stain her face and she wipes her hand across her cheeks to remove the evidence. She has had dreams like this before, but this one is hands down the worst. Ever since Nick was attacked they have happened with increasing frequency too. She wishes desperately to find solace, but there is no way she can ask it from Nick. He doesn't need to be burdened with her weakness, not when he already has so much to deal with on his own. He was the one who almost died after all.
She looks to the walkie talkie by her bed. She implemented them after Nick came back from the hospital so that he didn't have to get up and about more than he had to. She slowly reaches for it despite herself. She holds it close and runs a finger along the rim, freezing on the button that will allow him to hear her voice. No. She can't. She lays back down, but she does not put the device back where it belongs.
Across the apartment Nick awakens almost simultaneously. He gulps in air, relishing in the feel of it as it fills his lungs. He runs a hand over his head, bending his ears back. It was that same old dream again – the one he has had every other night since his run in with Bellwether. His hand hovers over the walkie talkie on the nightstand, just like every night. He battles within himself – whether to be weak and admit to the nightmares that plague him or to bottle it up inside. He honestly isn't sure how much longer he can take this.
As he turns to roll back over in bed, a faint sound reaches his ears. His ears prick and he stops. Slowly he turns his head around to stare at the walkie talkie. For a long moment there is silence and he questions whether or not there was ever any sound at all. Then it comes again. Tiny sobs slither through the receiver. "Judy…?" He says to the emptiness. Is she crying? He bites his lip. He can't just hobble in there and ask. Ultimately she would just get mad at him for getting up about 'something that wasn't even a problem', because as much as she chastises him about it she has developed quite a tendency of burying her emotions. All because of that day.
He decides to pick the walkie talkie up and push the button. "Carrots?"
Judy sucks in a soft breath and jerks into a sitting position. She collects herself in a flash and responds. "Yeah, Nick. I'm here." She releases the button fast as lightening so that he won't hear her sniffle. "Do you need something?"
Nick frowns. Yes, but it isn't what she thinks. "C'mere." The only way he'll be able to get her over here without giving her a heart attack is to be as vague as possible.
Judy doesn't miss a beat. She shoves the walkie talkie back in its place and leaps from her bed to go to his room. There was a time where she would have toyed with him first, but there was also a time where they didn't have walkie talkies in their rooms. She wipes her sleeve across her face one last time before rounding the corner and entering his room. "Yes?" She barely breathes as she waits for what he has to say.
"Are you alright?" Nick tilts his head as he asks.
"Of course I am." A tiny, nervous smile twitches at Judy's lips. "Why do you ask?" Did he have a nightmare where she got hurt? Is he finally going to open up to her about all this?
"You know, just because I'm hurt doesn't mean you have to pretend to be okay."
Judy grimaces and stiffens. She laughs, but it cracks at the edges. "What are you talking about? I'm not pretending." She shrugs. "I'm fine. More fine than you."
Nick shakes his head. "More fine then mean doesn't make you fine. It just means you are less broken." Honestly he has doubts now that even that is true. His experience was scarring, true, but if she has woken up sobbing quietly in the dark as often as he has gasping for air he has to wonder if perhaps she hurts worse.
"Nick," Judy takes a step back. Her heart speeds up in her chest and her breathing kicks up a notch. She needs to get out of here. "If you don't need anything, then I'm going to go-"
"Don't."
Judy starts at the sharpness in his voice.
"Judy, if you talk to me, then I'll talk to you." He looks hard at her, his brilliant green eyes piercing the darkness.
Judy swallows hard. Judy. He only uses her name when things are serious or when he his scared – for her or himself. It sways her more than she would like to admit. And of course she wants him to open up to her. But she doesn't want to add to his baggage with her stupid, insignificant problems. Nothing happened to her. She's just being childish. At least that's what she has spent the last month telling herself. Eventually she manages a small nod. "Okay." She slinks forward, to the side of his bed.
Nick doesn't hesitate. He acts without asking and trails a finger across her cheek. "You've been crying." He knew it already, but now she can no longer deny it.
Judy turns her face away from him. "It's nothing." She mumbles.
Nick hears clearly the words hidden in the silence. Nothing compared to you. "It is." Nick asserts. "I may have been the one who almost died, but you're the one who almost lost me. You would have had to live with that. And it would kill you."
Judy sobs softly. "I'm such a child." She clenches her hands at her side.
"No you're not." Nick shifts so there is more space next to him. "Cops can have bad dreams too – fears. And talking about them will make it better. You taught me that."
Judy snorts. "I didn't teach you anything. You still refuse to abide by it."
Nick shrugs. "What else did you expect from a dumb fox?"
Judy chuckles, but it is weak and broken.
"Come on," Nick pats the place next to him. "Tell me what hurts."
Judy ducks her head and bites her lip. She hesitates despite everything. Oh well. If she is going to tell anyone, it will definitely be him. She crawls up next to him, drawing her knees to her chest and resting her chin atop them. "It's never exactly the same, but it's always bad." Her voice already wavers with the knowledge of what's to come. "You are barely breathing or drowning or-or bleeding out." Her grip in her legs intensifies and she trembles. "I'm running to get to you, but I never get any closer and always…always Bellwether is there." Her throat tightens. "And you die." Hot tears run down her cheeks and sobs choke her. As much as she hates herself for being an attention hog, she can't stifle it.
Nick wraps an arm around her and pulls her close. "Carrots," His own voice wavers despite how strong he tries to be for her. "You should have told me." He rubs her arm.
Judy shakes her head. "You don't need this." She whimpers. "I'm supposed to take care of you."
Nick sighs. "Trust me, you help me by telling me when you hurt. Otherwise I hurt even worse knowing you are suffering alone."
Judy leans into him. She releases her hold on her legs to lock her arms around him. "Zootopia was supposed to be a great place. A place where I was happy. But I don't even want to be here anymore."
"I know." He has felt that way for almost all of his life though. Even with all this disaster as of late, however, he has never been more comfortable with his place in the city. As long as Judy is by his side no problem will be enough to send him back to that loathing from back then. Still, her eroding mental health makes it harder and harder. He needs to fix this. "Hey, maybe we need a break then."
Judy leans off of him just enough to look at his face. She wipes her hand over her face. "W-What?" She sniffles.
"The country does wonders for health. That doctor said something like that too, right? So why don't we get away?"
Judy frowns and her brows knit together. "But where?"
Wow she must really be in distress if she can't think of at least one place. "Bunny Burrow."
Judy perks. "O-Oh. Really? You…you want to go there?" It isn't that the last visit was terrible – he got along rather well with all her siblings. Her father on the other hand…was something else. Even her mother had her moments of prejudice.
It isn't a want so much as a need. "Yeah, it'll be good for us." He dreads the swarm of children because of his leg and her parents because as well-meaning as they are they are by no means as accepting as Judy. But Judy clearly needs this. She needs support that he has a single person can not give, especially not when he is battling his own demons, and her family is the perfect way to get it. Plus the fresh air will be good for him. Everyone involved will benefit, he'll just have to endure a few more displeasures in the process.
Judy smiles through her tears. She gets a distinct sense he is lying, but only halfway. It will be good for them health wise. He just might want to stab himself with a fork from her parents company. "Ok then. We should do it."
Nick nods. "Great. Right now though…right now I'm tired."
"Nick," Judy shoots him a sharp look. "You promised."
Nick averts his eyes. Of course she remembers. He should never expect anything less from her. Still, he hoped against hope that she would let it go like all the times before. Not tonight it seems. And he may be a lot of things, but he is no liar.
"Nick, it's ok." She lays her hand over his. "If I can tell you anything, then you can tell me anything too."
Nick sighs. He drops his gaze. "Mine's not so different. Only mine…it's real. I relive that night." He whispers. "Bellwether is there, she shoots, and then I can barely breathe." He swallows hard. "It's so long and painful, so much so that I pray to die faster. You aren't there either. And that…" His voice wavers despite his efforts. "That's the most terrifying part. I'm all alone. And no one ever knows when I'm gone."
Judy's eyes are wide and her mouth agape as her lips quiver. "Nick, I'm sorry." She squeezes his hand. "I'm sorry I wasn't there for you."
Nick utters a strained chuckle. "Don't be silly Carrots. You're always there when I need you. If you weren't then I would have died that night. But I didn't." He smiles softly down at her. "Tonight too. You're here right now."
Judy lets out a breathy laugh and smiles in return.
"Judy…" Nick's voice is solemn all of a sudden.
Judy's ear pop straight up. Again he uses her real name. It's just one of those nights. "Yeah?" She holds her breath.
"Would you…" Nick hesitates. It's in his very nature. "Stay here tonight?" He is sure it won't make a difference, but perhaps her presence with soothe his restless mind even in the depths of sleep.
Judy smiles, a sentiment tinged with sadness. "Sure." It isn't just for him, she knows it. She prays his closeness with ease her mind and pave the way for a peaceful night devoid of dreams. And even if it doesn't, he'll be right there. She won't have to worry about something being wrong.
Nick slides further into his pillow. "Okay."
Judy wriggles down into the sheets. She curls up and closes her eyes, a thought striking her at the last moment. She wavers in her decision, but finally she reaches over and curls her fingers around his wrist. A massive weight lifts from her at this tiny action and she relaxes almost instantly. She puffs out a breath and a tiny smile lifts her lips.
Nick infers her action as permission and takes hold of her wrist. Maybe Judy is right, maybe they are being childish. Still, it is a sentiment they share so he is content in being a child. After all, it's not like they'll be this way forever. Soon they'll recover and then they'll find her – Bellwether. And she'll regret the day she ever stepped back into their lives. This he swears.
So, how'd you like it? Nightmare hurt/comfort is my fav. Sorry that the chapters have gotten heavier and aren't going back and forth between heavy and lighthearted anymore. I never was very good at lighthearted. lol Please review!