Clary smiled down at the text on her phone and her chest tightned. She missed him so much. Yet most people would tell her she had only known him for three days and after five months of texting things would've changed. That's what her oh so supporting mother told her. But Clary knew the real truth; she was in love.

Ya ya, you're probably thinking 'She's thirteen, she doesn't know anything about love.'

Well fuck you

That's what she kept telling her mom at least and she never once got punished for it. She wished she would have though. Her mom treats her like a baby, so fragile she could break with the tiniest words. But she wasn't, she was happy enough.

Actually that was a lie. The only thing that made her happy was Jace.

She remembered the day he had left like it was yesterday. He had told her from the start of their three days he was leaving to tour around the world with his band and he wouldn't be back for a year.

Flashback

"I don't want to leave you." Jace whispered and leaned his forehead down agaisnt hers. He had to bend his knees alittle.

"I'm not going to stop you from going." Clary said. "We've know each other for three days Jace. I'd be crazy to ask you something that big."

He pulled her into a hug and kissed the top of her head. "It seems like we've known each other so much longer."

They stood there for a while and held each other tightly. The rest of the band had left the previous day and took the day to recover from the jet lag but Jace was making it just in time for the show.

"I wish I could stay," He sighed. "I'd just be letting everyone down though."

Clary responded sternly to his words, "You are going to have so much fun. If you don't go you're going to regret it."

He stared at her for a moment before his eyes lit up. "Maybe you could come with us."

Clary wished that could've been possible. She wished she wasn't so much younger then him. That she had graduated too. That she was almost and adult like him. He was just a mere months away from turning eighteen while she had five years! She started to feel insecure. How was this going to work? How were they suppose to have a relationship with such a big age gap? Did Jace even want it to work? Did he just feel obligated because of what she went through?

"Jace... I have school, you know this. And besides I would just be something extra for you to have to deal with."

His eyes were full of confusion. "What do you mean?"

She sighed, "You're going to meet someone your own age and forget about me. I'm also what my mother said to be 'mentally unstable'. No way in a million years would she ever let me go and travel around the world with, in her eyes, potential rapists."

Her gripped her shoulders firmly but not to tightly as to hurt her. "Please stop doubting yourself, Clary. You are not unstable you've just gone through a difficult time. And I'm NOT going to forget about you. You are absolutely amazing no matter how young you are. Guess what Clary? Four and a half years really isn't that much." He said softly.

She pulled away from his grip. "I'll call you tomorrow."

"Promise?"

She smiled smally, "Promise." And he bent down a pecked her lips lightly.

-How are you doing, baby? I miss you so much! -Jace

-I'm fine. Everything is pretty much normal -Clary

She got up and went into her bathroom waiting for Jace to text he back. She leaned her body onto the counter and looked at herself in the mirror. Eyes bags black as night, pale skin, and worst of all.

Scars

Everywhere

She hadn't stopped cutting. She tried but it was addictive. She felt so guilty for continuing to do it because of Jace. He kept asking her if she was okay, if everything was alright, and if she needed to talk but every time she just said she was fine. The truth was she was far from fine and she really wanted to stop. She wanted help.

She picked up one of her blades and squeezed it in her hand. She felt her skin rip and her blood trickle down her arm. She let out a satisfied sigh, maybe just one more cut?

No! She needed help. She had watched reality TV before and knew that the only way you'd get help was if you admitted you had a problem. And she did have a problem. A big one.

She threw the blade across her bathroom and let out a sob. Without even paying attention to her cut she grabbed her cell phone and dialed his number.

"Hey baby, how are-"

"Jace." Clary inturrpted quietly. "I have to tell you something."

His voice turned to panic, "Clary, what is it? Are you okay."

"No, I'm n-not." Her voice cracked. "I c-cut myself Jace and I don't know how to stop.