Thank you to everyone who has decided to give this story a chance. Hope you enjoy it.
I will update every Monday, until I graduate the 16th of may and then I'll try to update twice a week instead but no promises.
Chapter 1: ''Choices''
''Good judgment comes from bad experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.'' -Will Rogers
The ongoing ringing of my phone finally woke me from my slumber.
''What?'' I intelligently mumbled into the speaker.
''Get your sorry excuse of an ass to work, Edward. You should have been here over an hour ago..'' Eleazar, my uncle who is also my boss barked at me.
I groaned and turned around to look at my clock sitting on my night stand, only to have the violating red numbers scream at me, that I in fact was an hour late soon going two.
''Shit!'' I cursed whiled I stumbled out of bed, ''I'll be there in a minute'' I said into the speaker, while trying to get my pants on and balancing the phone on my shoulder at the same time.
''You better be.'' And the call ended.
Some might say that it would have its perks to have your uncle as your boss; I am not one of them. Every time I did something slightly wrong, Eleazar would report back to my dad, telling him everything about it, this often resulted in somewhat awkward family gatherings.
I threw on the first shirt I could get my hands on, not really caring if it match my pants, since I would be changing my clothes as soon as I hit the station anyway, at lets face it; I looked good in anything.
I drove into the firehouse's parking lot, the same time as one of the fire trucks returned. I loved my job as a firefighter. Ever since my uncle brought me to the station for the first time I was hooked, never doubting my career path as so many others did. I had been the leader of an élite rescue squad for the past two years, a decision I think my uncle regretted he had made, more often than not.
I hadn't more than steeped into the living area, when my uncle called me into his office. Jasper my best friend, who also worked at squad shake his head at me, I showed him my middle finger, only resulting in him laughing his ass of, and my uncle yelling impatiently at me to get my ass into his office.
I stepped into Eleazar's office, sitting my ass down in his office chair and swinging my legs up on his desk.
''Get off my chair. Now!'' He yelled while slamming his office door shot. Realising he wasn't interesting in any of my shit today, I slowly got off his chair, and instead sat in one of the chairs on the other side of the desk.
Eleazar put his head in his hands as he sat down in his chair. ''What's your excuse today Edward?'' His tone implied he didn't really care why I was late, probably because he already knew the answer.
A month or so ago the alarm in the house went off; notifying that there was a fire in one of New York's most popular nightclubs, Breaking Dawn. When the team and I arrived at the scene; the fire had already spread through the entire club, making it impossible for us to go in. While the truck team was getting the water hose ready, I listened to the screams coming from the building covered in flames right before my eyes. I recall Jasper asking me what my orders were and that I told him to stand back, knowing we wouldn't be able to go in before the fire was under control.
When we finally got the fire under enough control for my team to go in, it was too late. That night 43 people burned to death. Among them was my cousin Tanya, Eleazar's oldest daughter.
I had gone through the nights events a thousand times, trying to find a what if that could have made the difference. What if I had walked through the flames, would I have been able to save her? Save my favourite cousin.
This was the kind of thoughts that kept me up at night and resulted in that I was once again late for my shift.
''I'm sorry.''
''I know what you're going through Edward, and I know that you blame yourself – but that night was hard on all of us. Try and keep it together at least for your team, for me…'' He trailed off.
I knew that I needed to be strong for him he deserved it. He was the one who had lost a daughter, but when it came down to it, it was my call not to save her, my fault that he lost her.
If I didn't stop being late every other day, Eleazar would probably make me take a leave so I could get better. If it hadn't been because I was his nephew he would probably have done it the morning after the fire, when he saw what state I was in. I guess there was some perks at having your uncle as your boss anyway.
''I will.'' I mumbled.
''Good. Firefighter's day is coming up on Friday. I think it will be best if you take the first truck shift, that way you will only have to talk to the kids and their parents, no one will be bothering you with questions about the fire.''
After the fire, news reporters had camped outside the firehouse, trying to get my statement why we hadn't tried to save the ones inside, when I refused to talk to them, they had sought out my house and camped there instead. It had died down now. The people not affected by the fire had forgotten about it and moved on with their lives, no longer moaning over their fellow citizens. But the heat of the accident was sure to come back on firefighter's day.
''What, no! I'm not even on truck!'' I protested. Firefighter's day was an annual event, taking place on the 4th of May, it is supposed to honour and recognize us firefighters for the sacrifices we make to protect the people. A sacrifice I didn't make that night.
''Edward I'm not trying to punish you, I'm only trying to do what's best for you.''
I didn't have it in me to fight him. I was acting like a spoiled kid that had lost his favourite toy; reality was that Eleazar had lost so much more than I had.
''I'll take the shift..'' I trailed off and stood up and was just about to walk out of the office, when Eleazar's voice stopped me in my tracks.
''Are you coming over for dinner on Sunday?'' It was tradition in my family to have a Sunday family gathering where we took shifts in hosting the dinner. I hadn't been to a single one since the fire.
I nodded still with my back to him, then steeped out of the office and went straight for the locker room. ''Fuck fuck fuck'' I yelled while banging both of my hands into my locker, leaving dents all over it.
''What's up with you today man?'' I swung around seeing Emmett standing in front of his locker, changing from his firefighter clothes to his regular ones with a smug grin plastered on his face, no doubt enjoying my obvious discomfort.
''Nothing, just having a bad day.'' I answered.
Emmett of course new about the fire, he had been there himself. He and I had both attended the firefighter academy in New York, later we were both stationed on New York firehouse 55 and when I was made leader of the squad team, he became leader of the truck team. That night he had done his job – doing his best to put out the fire, while I had stood doing nothing.
''It's going to get better, you know?'' He said, looking completely serious at me, all kidding a side.
''I know.'' I gave him an encouraging smile.
He shook his head at me, swung his back over his shoulder and walked out of the locker room.
''Emmett!'' I yelled after him.
He turned around. ''Yes?''
''Eleazar gave me truck duty on Friday, so you're a free to go and do whatever you want.''
''You mean I can go and find a hot woman and bring her home with me, and I wont get in trouble for it?''
''That's exactly what I mean.'' I grinned at him while changing into a wife beater and my firefighter pants.
Emmett walked away; no doubt hurrying home to get some much-needed sleep. Since he wasn't as affected by the fire at Breaking Dawn as the rest of us, he had taken extra shifts to cover from our absent.
I finished changing and walked into the living area. Jasper was sitting on the couch. ''You good man?'' His southern drawl made him sound lazy in my ears, but the women loved it. He was originally from Texas but had been a firefighter in Los Angeles before he transferred to our Station in New York. He had started here shortly after Emmett and I had, and had connected with us because we too where new. He and I had quickly become best friends.
Around noon the fire alarm went off, signalling that there was a fire to fight. As I sat in the front seed of the truck feeling the adrenalin run true my veins, all thoughts of Tanya and bad choices left my mind and I focused only on the task ahead.
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