Chapter 4 - Resurrecting the Wolf

Jeffries scowled at Ceri. If stares could have pinned a person like the point of a sword, Jeffries' stare certainly would have.

"Before I go upstairs to calm Maddy down, you're going to tell me what this 'eyethwyd' is all about. What it is, and why your mate thinks we need to send Maddy 'through it.'"

"This is wild wolfblood business," Ceri replied. The assertive tone of her voice showed she wasn't in the least intimidated by Jeffries' best head teacher's stare. But on this one issue, the human was more than a match for her. Jeffries came striding over to her… and he didn't care that her eyes were changing to the brightest yellow.

"You want to wolf out in the middle of my kitchen, be my guest, but I'm getting some answers." Jeffries pointed his finger towards the ceiling. "There's a girl up there, a young woman up there, and she's my responsibility. When Maddy Smith came to me, I promised her a home, I promised I'd be here for her. I meant it." Jeffries got up in Ceri's face, which took every ounce of courage Jeffries had. Every fiber of his being screamed at him to back down, but he didn't. This mattered far too much. He had seen Maddy come so far since that fateful day when she'd come to him, psychologically devastated from the loss of her parents and with no one else to help her. Since the day he'd discovered he had a 'she-wolf' as one of his students.

"Haven't we been through this already?" Gerwyn butted in. He inserted himself between the two of them and gave Ceri a look of warning. "He's human, love, but he's Maddy's guardian. To Maddy, he's become family. He's like the loving uncle who took care of her when her life fell apart. We may as well accept that."

Jeffries froze at Gerwyn's words. He was a stiff and proper man 9 times out of 10. He'd never thought of himself as a 'loving uncle' to Maddy. He studiously avoided dwelling on their relationship at all. They had gone through this awkward phase, true, and gradually Tim Jeffries had made the transition from Maddy's teacher to first and foremost Maddy's guardian.

And the history teacher would never, ever have admitted it to anyone if they'd asked—but the truth? The truth was that Jeffries loved Maddy like his own child. He couldn't even pinpoint when it had started. There wasn't a single moment in time. Just gradually, bit by bit… the wolf girl had snuck her way into his heart. The prim and proper Mr. Jeffries was apparently much more human than he was willing to let on in front of all his students and colleagues. There was a time when I could just focus on academic excellence. There was a time when my life had boundaries. THAT was before wolfbloods though. Jeffries sometimes yearned for those simpler times.

"Let me be clear, you can tell me right this instant what I need to know or we can have a shouting match. Your choice. Also, the sooner you tell me what's going on, the sooner I can go up and check on Maddy," Jeffries finished. He folded his arms in front of his chest and gave Ceri the expectant look he usually reserved for impossible juvenile delinquents. Come to think of it, Jeffries thought randomly to himself, juvenile delinquents and wild wolfbloods have a lot in common. He resisted the urge to growl at her and waited for her to decide. Besides, her growl was probably scarier anyway.

Gerwyn put his hand on Ceri's shoulder.

"Love, we need to tell him. You know we can trust him. I know this is one of those sacred pack secrets, but if there's one human in the world who needs to know…" Gerwyn's touch immediately affected his mate. Her face softened. She nodded, and then…then she and Gerwyn told Jeffries everything.

Fifteen minutes later, Jeffries walked up the stairs towards Maddy's bedroom. He was still numb from shock from Gerwyn and Ceri's revelation. He knocked gently on Maddy's door. No answer. He walked in and shut the door behind him.

There, on the neatly folded-up comforter, lay a wolf with warm-toned brown fur. The wolf immediately rose up and snarled at him. Maddy's wolf never growled at him like that. For just a split second, Jeffries felt a stab of genuine fear. He stepped forward anyway. Surely her anger would subside.

"Maddy, please change back into human form. We need to talk." He reached out his hand. She snapped at him, but a moment later the wolf shuddered and began to writhe on the bed. There was a battle of wills—Maddy's human against her wolf. Jeffries looked on with concern as the teenage girl finally morphed on the bed, her body still trembling violently. Tears were in her eyes.

"Jeffries, I'm so sorry. I didn't…" The forlorn look on her face told Jeffries what he already knew. Her wolf was becoming harder to control. He and Ceri and Gerwyn were right. "I…my wolf. My wolf was so angry at you. So irrational. I couldn't…" Her expression crumpled as the wolfblood girl flung herself off the bed. Before Jeffries knew what in the world was happening, the she-wolf had flung her arms around him like a drowning victim. She hugged him so hard, as if she were holding on to him for dear life.

The old Jeffries would have stiffly stood there, maybe awkwardly patted Maddy on the back. But Maddy's presence in Jeffries' life had changed him over the past year. The head teacher softened. He stroked Maddy's hair just the slightest bit and rubbed her back with his other hand.

"SSSHHH. It's all right. You didn't hurt me. It takes more than an angry wolf to intimidate the likes of Tim Jeffries," the head teacher said proudly. Maddy was crying against Jeffries' shirt, but when she heard the teacher's comment, laughter escaped between her sobs. His levity seemed to pull her out of her guilt-ridden thoughts. Maddy wiped away her tears and blinked up at him.

"I'm sorry, Tim. I would never, ever hurt you," she said.

"Besides the time you bit me?" he said. His eyes were filled with gently-teasing humor. He wanted to see how Maddy would react. If she burst into tears, it meant she was still in a fragile state. When Maddy rolled her eyes at him, he felt better.

"That was a long time ago. Can we please not talk about that? I promised you I'd never lose control like that again. I would never hurt you."

"I know you wouldn't." He sighed and had her sit next to him on the bed. The two of them looked out the window. It was a sunny day, with birds singing from every shade-dappled branch. It was one of those idyllic afternoons where it was hard to believe harsher realities still existed.

"I need to talk to you about something. I have some good news. You can stay with me this summer, if that's what you want."

Maddy brightened. "Of course it's what I want." Her eyes narrowed. "But I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop. What's the bad news?"

Jeffries took a deep breath. He couldn't believe what he was about to say. It would sound ridiculous. Then again, the whole idea of 'wolfbloods' and people changing into actual wolves had originally sounded pretty ridiculous too.

"Have you ever heard of the 'eyethwyd'?"

Maddy's cute face was now frowning at him. "No. Should I have?"

Jeffries smiled. "Probably not. It comes from the Welsh root word, 'freuddwyd,' which means 'to daydream.' Wild wolfbloods believe that there is a world, think of it as a 'dream world,' which the soul of every wolfblood has a connection to…through that person's inner wolf. Do you follow me so far?"

Maddy nodded. "I think so. So this 'eyethwyd' is sort of like an alternate reality where only the wolf can fully be, but the human can't?"

"Yes." Jeffries sighed. "There are supposedly ways to put a wolfblood in a trance, so that the human can cross over with their wolf. The human stays in a dreamlike state though."

"Like, what, being in a coma?"

Jeffries nodded. "Close enough, yes. And the wolf navigates the dream world to 'feed' and to 'hunt.' Then the wolf comes back, restored and rejuvenated, to its host. To the human it's bonded to."

"Okay…" Maddy said. "And we're talking about this weird dream world because…?"

Jeffries gripped Maddy by the shoulders and made her meet his concerned stare.

"Maddy, your wolf is out of balance with your human side. Your human's had a chance to fully mourn and grieve your parents' loss, and come out the stronger for it, and that's wonderful. But as I've said before, your wolf's never gone through that healing process. Gerwyn thinks that, between your upcoming move to Inverness as you go off to university, plus leaving your ancestral home of Stoneybridge, all of it's triggered the darker emotions of your wolf feeling adrift. Now Gerwyn has an idea that might help your wolf overcome its grief, and it's not without its dangers. I won't let you do it, not until you've heard all the details of it and agreed to it with eyes wide open."

"So…wait. You're saying that I have to let my wolf go on some sort of dream hunt or dream quest so that it can, what, get itself sorted out?" Maddy's voice was filled partly with awe, partly with fear. "That sounds dangerous."

"It is." Jeffries put a hand to his head. He pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed as if the weight of the world were crushing him. "I didn't even want to give you this choice. I voted to have you go live with Gerwyn and Ceri. But Gerwyn is adamant that this is the most direct way to help your wolf. He believes, if we immerse you in the eyethwyd and force your wolf to confront its darkest emotions as manifested in the wolf's dream world, it'll allow your wolf to truly and fully heal." Jeffries regarded her bleakly, hating that this was something he couldn't do for her. He couldn't protect her from this. She was becoming an adult, and Jeffries knew—though he preferred to forget—that this wouldn't be the last time he'd feel so helpless.

Maddy paced back and forth. She looked hopefully at Jeffries, then looked away, suddenly feeling shy.

"So…you don't want me to do it?"

Jeffries shook his head firmly. "No. I'd prefer that you live with Gerwyn and Ceri for the summer. Hopefully their wolves can influence yours, pull your wolf through the grieving and mourning process without having to go through such drastic measures."

"So if I go through with it, if I choose to journey inside this 'eyethwyd,' this dream world, you'll be really worried about me?"

Jeffries suddenly looked uncomfortable. "Well, of course. I'll—"

"Thank you Tim. For being there for me. Promise me, if something happens, you won't blame yourself. This is my decision. I…" Maddy squared her shoulders and gave Jeffries her bravest expression, chin up and defiant. "I can't do this unless I know that you're going to be okay no matter what…even if something happens to me."

"I'll be okay with whatever you decide," Jeffries insisted.

"And if something happens to me, you won't blame yourself?" the short brunette countered.

"I promise, I won't blame myself," Jeffries lied.

The petite girl nodded, finally satisfied. "In that case, tell Gerwyn I'll do it. I'll brave the dream world with my wolf. I'll take whatever steps I need to."

Jeffries shifted nervously. He got up and turned towards the door. Then he froze, turning back. "I think for now, Maddy, you may want to keep this just between us. Don't even tell Rhydian. Gerwyn and Ceri are concerned he may not be…on board with you going."

"He'll think it's too dangerous. He'll be furious," Maddy admitted. She nodded reluctantly. "Okay. You're probably right." Maddy brightened. "Speaking of which, can you tell Rhydian to come upstairs? There's something I need to talk to him about."

Jeffries nodded. As he shut the door behind him, it left the wolfblood girl wondering. I don't want to lie to the person I love most. What will I tell him? Her heart and mind struggled, but she couldn't get around it.

There were no easy answers.

A/N - Hey wolfblood fans,

I'm sorry about the gap between posting chapters for this story. A close friend was stabbed to death recently. The last week or so has been really rough. I'm glad I spoke at the funeral and glad I could be there to support everyone, but yeah, this was just hard all around. Writing is the perfect antidote at times like this, though, so expect to see more chapters from me! I love you guys. Thank you for all the comments you've given. Please keep it up :)