Lost

Disclaimer; all characters and copyright belong to SM.

A/N-thank you for the kind reviews! Please be warned that there are some subjects touched upon that readers may find distressing!

Chapter Thirteen

Eighteen months earlier:

Bella sat in the back of the luxurious black car. It was just another of the Cullens range of expensive vehicles. Carlisle had loaned it to Edward so he could transport Bella to their honeymoon destination in style. They had even hired a chauffeur to drive them to the airport. Even now Bella had no idea where she was going on her honeymoon. Edward was being very mysterious about it. She couldn't help but feel apprehensive. Her mind was still reeling from her confrontation with Jacob. Bella sat with her hands clasped in her lap to stop them shaking. Edward had told her to forget about Jacob Black, but as far as Bella was concerned it was impossible. He was her best friend, no he was more than that, he was a part of her. He was ingrained in her soul. Bella kept thinking of their parting. Her last sight of him had been Sam and his brothers dragging him away. Why had she said those things to him? Her words had been spiteful. Was she trying to prove a point? She had hurt him and for what?

Tears leaked out of Bella's eyes even as she tried to contain them. Edward was saying his last goodbyes to his family. Bella was hidden from their view by the darkened windows of the car. It was her last chance to be alone. Her silky blue going away dress felt too clingy on her skin. She was uncomfortable. She longed for her usual uniform of t-shirt and jeans. She tugged at the hem trying to pull it over her knees. Damn, why couldn't she stop crying? She should be happy. The whole ordeal of the wedding was over; she was going to leave for her honeymoon where she and Edward would finally be alone. Isn't that what she wanted? So why wasn't she happy?

It was obvious why. Jacob. It always came down to Jacob. Bella reached up and rubbed her forehead to try and expel the ache. She was edgy. This wasn't how it was supposed to be. She wanted to speak to Jacob. She wanted to make things right. Where was her cell? Bella dug her fingers into the pocket of the dark blazer which covered her slim shoulders. She found the phone and pulled it out. It could only be a quick call. She just needed to hear his voice. She needed to tell him that she was sorry, for everything.

But Bella never got the chance. Edward chose that moment to climb into the back seat next to her. He shut the door sealing them inside. He saw the cell in her hand straight away. Bella immediately looked guilty, like a child caught with her hand in the cookie jar. Edward quickly prised the cell phone out of her shaking fingers and stared at the screen showing Jacob's number. "Why?" He asked Bella stiffly. "Can't you just let him go? He could so easily have ruined our wedding day. You remember what he said to you."

"He's my best friend." Bella whispered. She hated seeing the pain in Edward's eyes.

Edward didn't respond right away. He switched the phone off and tucked it in the pocket of his suit jacket. "You need to put him out of your mind. You're never going to see him again, Bella."

It was hitting her now. This was it. This was the moment where she was going to give up everything to Edward, even her own life. Bella opened her mouth to say something but Edward had already signalled for the chauffer to pull away. The sleek black car began to edge down the gravel driveway. Bella could see Carlisle and Esme waving them off in a dignified manner. Rosalie had already gone back inside the mansion. She had always made her feelings clear. Only Alice ran after the car, waving madly while Jasper and Emmet looked on in amusement. Then they were gone.

Isle Esme was a tropical island off the coast of Rio de Janeiro. Bella was taken aback by the beauty of the place as well as the remoteness. Edward had finally revealed their destination as they boarded their private plane. The Island had been a gift from Carlisle to Esme. Edward described the vast beaches with white sparkling sand. Its warm waters held tropical fish. It was a paradise surrounded by vast jungles and even had its own indigenous population. "Esme furnished the house herself." Edward said proudly once they had landed and were on the last part of their journey. "You'll love it."

The house was indeed beautiful just like he had said. But to Bella it was a cold beauty. There was no warmth about the place. In fact it was decorated in the same style as the mansion in Forks. The house was huge, too large for such a small island. Large glass windows dominated most of the house; it had two spacious bedrooms, one decorated in white, the other a sultry blue. It had one large bathroom, a polished modern kitchen and a vast window overlooking the beach.

"This will be our room for the duration." Edward held her hands in his as he led her into the white bedroom. It was so light that it hurt Bella's eyes to look at it. It was too white. She was frightened she might soil the furnishings and spoil the perfection. Edward's eyes rested on the bed, they shone with promise of things to come.

It was at that moment that Bella felt her first sliver of regret.

Night was drawing in. Bella had unpacked her things. None of the clothes she had chosen were in the luggage. Instead Alice had replaced them all with her own choices. Bella's fingers shook as she held up the silky black negligee Alice had chosen for her honeymoon night. The material was gossamer thin and left little to the imagination. The time was drawing near. Bella perched on the edge of the bed with her knees drawn up to her chest. Edward was in the process of pouring her a glass of champagne. He was even going to indulge in a small glass himself to mark the occasion. Bella stared at his broad back; his white skin sparkled in the soft candlelight. He wasn't wearing a shirt just a pair of swimming shorts. Seeing him unclothed like this was unnerving. She wasn't used to it. Edward turned, holding two glasses in his hands and wearing a soft expression. He walked over to her casually and handed her a glass.

"To us." Edward toasted.

"To us." The glass wobbled in Bella's hand as she raised it to her lips.

Edward only took a dainty sip. He put the glass to one side and held out his hand toward Bella. "Let's go for a dip before…." His golden brown eyes travelled to the huge bed, leaving the rest unsaid.

Bella sucked in her lower lip as she placed her hand in his. His cold fingers curled around hers. "Edward, I need to tell you something." She confessed weakly.

What is it, my love?" Edward asked with a gentle smile.

"I've changed my mind." Bella whispered.

The scene changed abruptly. Bella was sitting in the bathroom battered and bruised with her back pressed against the locked door. Edward was on the other side with his palms resting on the hard wood, his head hanging forward in agony. The room was full of feathers. The huge ornate bed was snapped in half. The pillows had been ripped apart, their contents strewn across the floor.

"I'm sorry, Bella." Edward apologised over and over. "I am so, so sorry."

Days later Bella was ill. The only food that she could keep down was eggs. For some reason she craved them. The silent maid would bring them in for her on a tray, muttering under her breath in her strange language. Edward had been keeping his distance. Bella was glad of it. She didn't want him near her. The bruises flowering on her fragile skin had darkened to black. But Bella was barely aware of them. Her heart and soul were shattered; her mind was a vast wasteland of numbness. She deserved to be ill. It was just punishment for the choices she'd made.

The scene changed again, everything was black. In the distance Bella could hear Edward's voice frantically begging Carlisle to save her. He didn't care how but he had to keep her alive. "Get that thing out of her." He screamed.

Bella's eyelids slowly opened letting in light. Carlisle Cullen's face swam into focus. He was wearing a surgical mask. All Bella could see was his golden eyes narrowed in concentration. He suddenly seemed aware that Bella was conscious. His smooth brow furrowed. She saw him raise his gloved hand. He was holding a long needle between his fingers. Bella tried to open her mouth to form words, to scream in protest. What were they doing? She felt the prick of the needle and knew no more.

The next time Bella regained consciousness she was bathed in a cold sweat. She could hear voices. Groggily she tried to force her lids to open but they remained glued shut. Instead she tried to focus on the voices. They were hushed so it was difficult to hear. Bella wished she could move but her body just like her eyelids wouldn't budge.

"It's fascinating." Bella recognised Carlisle's voice.

"I don't care." That was Edward. Even though Bella couldn't open her eyes she could feel his cold touch as he caressed her face. She wanted to recoil away from him but her body stubbornly refused to comply.

"I know this is difficult for you." Carlisle's voice was clearer now. He must be standing right next to Edward. "But I've been studying the foetus. It has genetic malformations I've never come across before."

"I'm only interested in getting my wife well again." Edward spat angrily.

"I understand that." Carlisle replied. His tone was filled with empathy. Bella wanted to be sick. Foetus? He had said foetus. Carlisle continued to speak. Neither he nor Edward was aware of Bella's silent distress. "But this could be the key to making her well."

"It's poison got into her bloodstream. It's killing her. How could it possibly help?" Edward sounded close to hysteria. He touched her face over and over in his agitation. Bella wanted to scream at him to get away from her but she lay in state before him like a plastic mannequin.

"That was an unfortunate side effect of the extraction." Carlisle didn't sound empathetic now but excited. He spoke faster. "This has given me a unique opportunity to perform research that could actually make a difference to our kind. Bella was carrying a hybrid, who's DNA was made up of both human and vampire chromosomes."

"Carlisle…." Edward interjected in agony.

"Listen to me, Edward." Carlisle said hurriedly. "Bella is turning. Soon her body will be on fire. There isn't a lot of time left. Right now she gives me a unique opportunity to further my research into giving our kind the chance to procreate. Think…I can give Esme what she has always desired, the ability to carry a child of her own. Think of Rosalie. Isn't having a child what she yearns for. And you and Bella, you could be a proper family…father, mother and one day child." Carlisle hammered the point home relentlessly. "That would mean she hadn't really given anything up after all. It would absolve your guilt about what happened."

Edward groaned as he continued to caress Bella's face with gentle fingers. All she could do was scream silently in her head as she listened to the horror story being played out in front of her.

"I have made so many breakthroughs already after experimenting on the foetus. I used shifter blood on it. The healing properties are a miracle unto themselves. I barely used a drop and the skin tissue began to regenerate. This coupled with the venom from the foetus and mixed with yours could be the answer to Bella's malady now. I could heal her, Edward. I just need to find the right dosage. Don't you see, Bella could be whole again, but stronger, much stronger." Carlisle wheedled. "And she would be strong enough to carry the next pregnancy to full term and live."

Edward collapsed by Bella's bedside. She felt him pressing his cold forehead onto hers. It was frightening having him so close. Her body was paralysed. She was a puppet in their hands. "Oh, my love." Edward moaned. He caressed her face again. "I want to make it up to you, so much. I know this isn't what you wanted, but Carlisle could give us the next best thing." His mentor's words had infected his mind and he already found himself agreeing. "She hates me, Carlisle. If she was conscious Bella would never condone this." He continued in anguish.

"She won't remember." Carlisle assured him quietly. "I have the perfect drug to suppress her memories. It's a powerful antidepressant. Its use was banned back in the 1960's because of the potent side effects, one of them being memory loss among other things."

Edward didn't even question what he meant by other things. Already he was building a new dream life in his head, the one where his wife loved him and they were surrounded by a family of their own making. "Can it really work?" He asked in a voice tinged with hope.

"I know it can." Carlisle said earnestly. "Trust me."

Bella was emotionally battered. Her mind couldn't cope with the revelations she was reliving. It was horrific, worse than she could ever have imagined. She was in so much distress that Old Quil broke the connection with her. He knew her fragile psyche couldn't handle anymore. Bella was almost catatonic. Old Quil, his face full of sorrow, guided the broken young girl back to the bed. Bella curled up onto her side away from him. The elder felt tears wet his face. What this poor child had suffered was evil beyond comprehension. For her sake he had to make her forget again. Right know she was too weak, both emotionally and physically, to handle what had happened to her. Old Quil knelt down beside the bed and began to chant softly. The fingers of his left hand began to emit a faint light. He placed them on Bella's forehead and he felt the tension ooze out of her body at his touch.

"Find rest, my child. When you awaken it will be as if I had never been here."

"What the fuck are we waiting for, Sam?" Jacob demanded. They had been keeping a silent vigil on the Cullen mansion for hours now. The vamps had stubbornly remained inside. Only the lights glowing through the large windows showed that there was anyone inside. Jacob still couldn't believe Carlisle and Edward's audacity. He wanted to storm down there and set the whole place alight.

"Like that would solve anything." Sam warned him.

"I know that." Jacob retorted harshly through the pack mind link. "I know that the key to finding out how to help Bella lies in that sick bastard's cold hands."

"At last you are thinking with your head and not just your heart." Sam sounded weary. "We have to play the long game."

"No, I disagree." Jacob growled. "Staking out Frankenstein's lair isn't getting us anywhere. I need to get inside the place and search for that memory stick. There had to be something on it that he was trying to hide or else why go to so much trouble to get it and the notebook back."

"And how do you intend to do that without being discovered." Sam replied irritably. He was having difficulty hiding his resentment at the whole situation.

"I'm thinking." Jacob muttered. "But right now I'm heading back home to check on Bella." He stood up on all four legs and shook his thick fur so that it ruffled out around him. It felt good to stretch his legs after being still for so long. Dawn was breaking over the horizon. It was time to go.

Sam began to wonder who the real leader was between them. This wasn't the first time Jacob had made a decision in the last couple of days and expected him to follow. But Sam was longing to get back to his imprint. He had been away from Emily for too long. "Just don't do anything rash." He said to Jacob as he followed after the russet wolf.

But his caution was in vain. Jacob wasn't even listening.

Quil had never seen his grandfather so disturbed. The old man had been meditating for hours but whatever he was seeking to gain from his communion with the spirits had no effect. When Old Quil emerged from his room he was more agitated than ever.

"Is there anything I can do, grandfather?" Quil asked worriedly.

Old Quil gazed at the tall young man he had raised as his own. He had come to love Quil like a son. This boy deserved the whole world just like all the others. They had all survived the last traumatic chain of events barely unscathed, but this was a whole different scenario. The elder couldn't live with what he had seen in Bella's memories. What Carlisle was doing was evil beyond comprehension. He was highly intelligent, manipulative and cruel but hid it behind a polished veneer. He was a highly respected physician, good looking and charming. He had used all these attributes to manipulate Ephraim and the last wolf pack into making the treaty.

"I am sorry, my boy." Old Quil put his hand on Quil's shoulder and looked him directly in the eyes.

"Why are you sorry?" Quil questioned in confusion. The old man was definitely losing it.

"For more than I can ever say." Old Quil dropped his hand back to his side. "I have to go."

"Where?"

"There is someone I have to see." Old Quil gazed at his adopted grandson for a long time as if burning his image into this memory. Then picking up his baseball cap and dark glasses he left the house with a mumbled goodbye.

A/N-thanks for reading!