13 years into the past...

It was quiet in the apartment on the second floor of the old house with its old peeling walls. Only the kitchen tap would drip from time to time and police sirens would disturb the relative stillness of this bad neighborhood. The long forgotten tv screen rippled like some kind of epileptic attack, blinking in the dark, allowing short quick snatches of the darkened room and the fast asleep man. A wrinkled tank shirt over a pair of loose underpants was all Casey Jones had on, passed out on his old living room couch, his fingers wrapped around an empty bottle tugged to his chest.

Looking at his human friend (first ever human friend) Raphael lingered, as his heart warned to crawl slowly out of his chest and drop to the floor, so he could step on it contentiously until he would feel no more of this... this pain! What was the right thing to do in a situation like this? He loved Casey, there was no doubt on that part! But he also longed for April so desperately, he couldn't even keep track of his emotions anymore. His life was absolute hell… As if walking all over his brainiac-brother's feelings wasn't enough, he managed to betray his best friend's trust, and worst of all - he was going to stain in his eyes the reputation of the woman he loved. How does one come out of all this in any kind of dignity? How was he to collect and glue back together the scattered pieces of his stupid life?

Was it even worth it?

Warm summer breeze slightly flipped the red scraps of his bandana ends, moving them in unison with the ragged curtain behind his shell. Stepping lightly away from the open window, he carefully and attentively chose where to place his feet, knowing that the floor was filled with enormous amounts of garbage such as beer cans, pizza boxes, newspapers, unwashed clothes and what not. Sighing, he fumbled for the remote and eventually turned the tv off. The room went absolutely dark, but Raphael could still make out the objects' outlines in the darkness (throughout the years he got used to sneaking back to the lair undetected, after his brothers and sensei had long been asleep).

Casey's bag, the vigilante usually dragged on every patrol or operation with the turtles (or his solo acts) was leaned against the wall at the far back, some of his weapons of choice were scattered on the floor. And the turtle couldn't help but smirk to himself (appreciatively, mind you) at his closest friend and his disgusting habits. It looked like Casey might have tried to play an improvised game of hokey with his hokey stick and an old tin can right there on the floor of his apartment, probably just before he dozed off. But the smile was wiped right off the turtle's face when a glass bottle rolled rattling over the floor all of a sudden, being kicked by his abstractedly incautious step. Raph flinched and froze in place, holding his breath. "Some stealth there, ya' stupid moron!" – he cursed.

"Raph? That you, man?" Sitting up straight, Casey was squinting in the darkness, trying to see who was there, while holding his bottle in front of his face, defending himself.

"Yeah, yeah… shellax, would ya'?" Giving up on his failed ninja-ing, Raph sank into the couch beside Casey, "And what exactly were ya' tryin'a do with 'dat thin'?"

Absently shrugging, Casey lowered his 'weapon' and scratched his eyes, then turned the floor lamp on (it wasn't really a floor lamp, though, it was simply a lamp that was on the floor): "Did I forget about some gig again?" – he asked, all confused and yawning widely.

"Wha? No… there's no GIG! En' ya' really should lock yer window, man… at least from time to time, ya' know... I didn't even have ta' make any effort!"

"Oh..." - said Casey, scratching his groin, "Okay… so what's up? Wanna a beer?"

"That'd actually be great!" Raphael prayed for some kind of a distraction.

"Help yourself, 's in the fridge" Saying that, the half-naked vigilante went to the toilet and took a loud wiz without shutting the door, while the turtle got up and went to the kitchen.

Moments later Raphael came back holding two beers: "Wouldn't hurt takin' care of that leakin' tap..." and he handed a beer to Casey, who was already back on the couch.

"Yup…" - said the human, popping open his fresh bottle of beer.

For several minutes, which felt to Raphael like hours, they just sat together in silence sipping their beers. Then the turtle sighed and, pulling himself together, precipitously looked at his friend.

"What?!" – snorted Casey in return.

"Nothin'..." - said Raphael and looked at his beer.

"What, the beer's not cold enough or somethin'?"

Raphael shook his head and taking another sip, put his drink on the floor: "Case, listen I… um… need to tell ya' somethin'… 's kind'a important!"

"Spill it out already, jeez!" - said the human, tossing several strands of his messy hair away from his eyes. Casey was used to Raphael's unannounced nightly visits. The turtle would often come over offering no explanations whatsoever. And that was okay in Casey's book. That's what friends are for. He knew how families could be sometimes, and he and Raphael shared the same amount of temper control. Sometimes they'd go picking fights with the street gangs to blow some steam, other times Raphael'd just crush on his couch, then in the morning he'd be gone. Simple as that. This time however, wasn't like all the others...

Raphael procrastinated a bit more, scraping the label off his beer using his thumb, and then just as if he was a kid who had to get over with it and gulp some super disgusting medicine, he suddenly fired out: "I love April! There you have it, okay? Fuck, man!"

Casey fixedly gazed at his friend's face for several long minutes, then pronounced absentmindedly: "Yeah, Raph. We all do..." - and slowly rolled his eyes.

Raphael aggressively shook his head as he face-palmed and growled. And Casey's mouth slammed shut as his eyes widened in surprise: "Oh, shit... you mean..."

The turtle shut his eyes as well and nodded, anticipating a burst or at least some kind of an aggressive response. However...

"Right…" Casey gulped down the rest of his drink in one breath and placing the empty bottle on the floor (to join the others) grabbed the turtle's shoulder in what he believed to be an act of friendly support. Only Raphael jumped at the sudden touch and ended up towering above the human, his fist in the air inches away from Casey's nose. "What's ya' problem, man?" Casey was taken aback by this unexpected move. This move meant that the turtle was ready for a fight, and that necessarily meant that there was a reason for such...

"Sorry!" Raphael released his grip and was by the window again in seconds, "This is a mistake! I should go..."

Casey jumped to his feet, knocking off all the beer bottles and spilling everything all over the floor: "Wait, Raph! Don' just drop a bomb like that on me and jump ouda' window... Let's talk! Maybe we can work something out... like we used to? I mean, we've sort'a been through this before..."

The turtle's white stealth-mode eyes drilled into Casey's pleading stare: "This time's not like before, Casey!" - he slowly whispered.

Casey scratched his nape, trying to figure out what was going on in his friend's green head, then spread his arms, shrugging: "Well, a'right... But don't you wanna talk to me? Isn't that what ya' came here for in 'da first place?"

Raphael remained still at the window, looking somewhat miserable and lost: "Casey! You don' understand! Everything's different now..." The human waited for him to continue, but the turtle just stood unable to bring himself to say what needed to be said. Casey searched his buddy's face, what was he hiding?

"We love each other!" Raphael's voice cracked a little when he said that, "There's nothin' here ta' work out, Case... I only wanted to be a good friend and tell you... first.."

"Wait!" The man was shaking his head in disbelieve, his long, messy, black hair scattering around his face, "Are you telling me that you two..?"

Raphael felt how close he was to the edge of his temper and snapped: "Yes Casey! We fucked! April and I had sex! That's what I'm telling ya'... is that so hard to believe?!"

Casey's face went dark, as he had to regulate a grimace of relative indifference to conceal the dagger (or more appropriately the sai) which went right through his heart, and there was a sudden twitch in his arm before he could find it in himself to react to what was just said: "When? When did ya'..?"

"Just before I came here..." Raphael's hands were shaking from the force with which he was clutching his fists in anticipation of an attack.

Casey Jones' brain was vigorously working overtime, making sense of the whole ridiculously unbelievable... excruciatingly painful situation his best friend just described to him. His best friend? The world was collapsing in front of his eyes. How could he do this to him?! Why?

Eventually, Casey took a deep breath and smoothing his hair back, away from his face, he took a step toward the turtle - to which Raphael reacted in taking his fighting position (no sai, just good ol' pair of green fists). Casey froze and raised his hands in front of himself indicating surrender and that he wasn't intending to fight, "Raph, buddy... Let's talk about it like adults, okay?"

Without moving a muscle, Raphael hissed clenching his teeth: "I didn't mean it to be like that, man! It jus'... It jus' happened..." He let out a miserable sigh and lowered his fists, his eyes went down to his feet, his head followed, "I... I'm sorry..."

Casey frowned: "You didn't mean..?" His hardly audible laughter alarmingly echoed through the room: "So you just accidentally landed into her? Is that what yer saying ta' me?"

"What? No... That's not..."

"Did you hurt her?" Casey cut him off, "Because if ya' did..."

Running this argument several times in his head before he came here, Raphael convinced himself that he was ready and that this was the right thing to do. Now he wasnt't all that sure anymore. The truth was, he was afraid. He was afraid of hurting Casey... not physically - that'll heel eventually, as always, 'cause it wouldn't have been the first time. He was afraid to hurt his friend's feelings. He never intended to betray his trust. Raphael was terrified that the situation with April would hurt Casey so much that he will lose him... this time forever.

"I'd never..." Raphael shook his head in disbelieve and contempt. He covered his eyes with his fists, avoiding Casey's eyes, and continued: "She called me... said you two had a fight or somethin'... "

"I don' understand..." Casey's voice finally gave away his swallowed pain, "We didn't fight... Why would she say that? Raph... why would you do this to me?"

Behind the hard chest-plates Raphael's heart exploded into millions of sharp pieces that immediately scattered all around his insides, impaling everything on their way. All his body ached when he repeated (maybe to make himself believe in the truth that it was): "I love her, Casey. I know you do too... But..."

"NO!" This time Casey almost hollered, cutting in, "No no.. You hear me? No! This can't be true!" He grabbed his head with his hands and looked to his feet at the floor, "I don't wanna fight you, Raph..."

Raphael stood still, immovable like a siege wall on the outside, but crashed and broken on the inside: "Me neither... But it might make ya' feel better..."

Casey raised his eyes at his so-called-friend and unable to master his emotions anymore he raised his hand and... slammed his fist into a nearby wall. It just went right through. Then he just stood there like that, shaking whole-bodily, tears streaming down his face, blood sliding down the wall and dripping onto the floor. "Get out!" - he hissed, "Get the fuck out'a here! I can't... What am I supposed to..? Fuck!"

Frozen in his place, Raphael watched his friend in agony. He was not intending to go... Not anymore... Not after he realized how much Casey needed his best friend right now. Moreover, he didn't really mind getting a little beat up, all in all he felt like he deserved it. "Case, yer bleedin'. We need'a patch ya' up..." - he said, trying to sound relaxed and soothing as much as he could, and making a few steps toward the human.

"Stay away!" Casey's voice reached an unfamiliar timbre. Nevertheless, the turtle kept moving silently and determinedly in his direction, "...don' come any closer! I'm warnin' ya'!" Casey's vision got blurry, as more and more tears were rolling down his face. He couldn't believe it! He felt like he couldn't breath. The pain in his right fist (still remaining inside the wall) was pulsing right into his swollen brain, but his maniacally beating heart was the actual reason for the particular way he felt at those moments.

"I'm sorry, man!" Raphael pulled his friend's hand out of the wall and carefully placed it at his side. Then fixedly looking into the man's face, he slowly touched his elbow and his shoulder, squeezing gently to check for any more possible damage. Casey didn't even flinch, only grunted slightly. And Raphael's eyes widened in astonishment, when all of a sudden stepping closer to the turtle, the human slowly lowered his head into the green shoulder, sobbing silently.

With tears and blood dripping to the floor, the two best friends stood together, holding each other and refusing to let go. No woman in the world could ever separate their bond. No woman in the world...

Except for April O'Neil.