White was all around me. The light was so bright. Was this what I was supposed to see? I played the song Dark Paradise by Lana Del Rey in my head. Singing each lyric carefully, the song I kept in mind to help me through my death. A hand held my own, but I couldn't make out the owner of it. The hand retracted.
Pain surged through my abdomen. I sat up with a start. I looked down, fire was on the edges of my gash, coming together and leaving behind healed flesh. I groaned as it fully healed.
I heard something drop. I looked to see the doctor in the doorway, his eyes wide. He fell over, Robbie behind him.
"Why did you do that?"
"Can't have him spreading rumors. You ok?"
"Sort of. I'm so sore."
"Well we better go, or they'll start asking questions."
I nodded and slid out of bed. I was in a hospital gown. Robbie turned and said over his shoulder, "I'll be out here."
"I'll just go in the bathroom, you big chicken."
He shook his head. I walked into the bathroom, carrying my bag. I shut the door, glancing at him before I closed it. I pulled out my jeans and shirt. They were bloody and dirty.
I came out.
"We're going to need to get you new clothes. Here, to cover up the blood."
He unzipped his jacket. He couldn't unzip it any faster.
Handing it to me, I pulled it over my shoulders. It was so big, the hem stopping mid-thigh.
He put his hand on the small of my back, and guided me to the front desk.
He's never put his hand there before.
He began to sign things as I turned to the waiting patients. A little girl looked at me with wide, curious eyes. Her braids were so perfect and cute with her pink dress. She must have been only 5 or 6. Her brown hair looked like my own, with blonde highlights and her eyes, so blue. I smied and waved, my hand coming out of the the too-big sleeve of the jacket. She smiled and waved back. I felt the happiness flow from her as I turned to Robbie. He grabbed my hand and we walked out.
I looked back at her, smiled again and carried on. I hoped she lived a good life, not becoming screwed up like myself.
Robbie helped me into the car. He got in the other side and started her up.
"I'm so sorry, I hope it didn't cost too much-"
"Its ok. Trust me, it was worth it."
He looked to me and smiled.
"Are you okay?"
"I told you-"
"No, emotionally."
"I-I don't know."
Before he set it in drive, the question fired from my tongue like a bullet, "Is it true."
"What?"
He looked into my eyes, as I held his gaze and remembered: Oh this is precious, Robbie have you finally found love?
"What he said, about you finding love."
He froze, his hand tightening on the gear shift.
"I-"
"Its ok if you don't. It's just-"
His lips touched mine.
Stop.
Stop time.
Stop everything.
This was what I needed, what I craved, what I wanted. Hello destiny, hello love.
I kissed back, embracing the moment. I set a hand on his neck, feeling the smooth warmth. I felt his shirt, the softness of it as he kissed me and kissed me and kissed me. It was soft, loving, but possessive. No hunger, no lust, no need….just love.
I pulled away.
"It's just," I breathed, "I do feel that way."
He breathed, taking in my air as he kissed me again, his hand cupping my neck's nape.
"To be honest, so do I. Ever since I set eyes on you, I felt it. I knew I couldn't let someone that made me feel this way walk out of my life. I couldn't miss another chance at happiness. There's too much pain in my life, too much blood, too much fire and horror. Too much darkness. I needed a light. I've been searching for one and I found her. Selene, you are my light. Your my angel to my demon and I love you."
I was crying, out of joy. His words poured through me and burned into my memory. All of it was like a song sung by angels, toned with pure love. He wiped my tears with his gloves. I reached across and embraced him.
"We're going to get through this, together." he embraced me tight, but cautious of my sore body.
"I just, thought you'd never say those words."
"I love you. I mean it. Every word."
Kissing him one more time, I whispered, "Say it one more time."
"I love you." he said on my lips as he kissed me. Pulling away I let more tears cascade down my cheeks.
He grabbed my hand, put Lucy in drive and we started to move.
I savored every word, every touch and every kiss.
I locked it up in the special chambers in my mind, the darkest deepest pits. I threw the key, walked away with a smile of a truly happy person.
We looked at each other and for the first time, our eyes danced with happiness and light, with love.