"You sure you don't want to come?" James asked.

"I always want to come. Mmm," Lily sleepily moaned, lying next to him in the hotel bed, naked with her butt facing the ceiling.

"Be serious," James chuckled.

"Would that turn you on? I don't really look anything like Sirius but if you want to roleplay…"

"Hey, I'm the one that makes jokes about his name!" James said, playfully popping her on her bottom, eliciting a light moan before he rolled out of bed.

"No, I don't want to go with you to meet Charity and her fiancé," Lily said.

James was surprised by her lack of interest. Lily was normally always up for meeting new people.

"Any reason why not?" James said.

"I don't know. What if her fiancé is a huge dick?" Lily asked.

"Then I'll be all alone with Charity and her huge dick," James said.

Lily snickered.

"No, I promised to hang with Sirius and Mary today. I like keeping my promises. Actually, I should get up," Lily said with a groan.

James showered and came out, giving Lily a kiss before he headed out the door, hitting the road to Brattleboro, Vermont a half hour drive away. They were meeting for lunch in a small cafe there.

Charity rushed up to him and embraced him tightly, looking just as she did the last time he saw her. She was a very short woman, with short curly brown hair.

"James. It's good to see you," Charity said, leading him over to their table.

A man stood up. He was wearing black even thought it was the middle of summer. His black hair looked oily and unwashed and his face seemed to have a natural sneer.

"Severus Snape," the man said, extending his hand, making James wonder where he had heard that name before.

Natalie was swinging in the old tire swing when Remus went out the backdoor, looking to play fetch with Josh, their golden retriever. The tire swing had been there, hanging from the large white ash tree in the backyard, when they moved in. Their father had done some repairs a few times but mostly it was as it had been left by the previous owners.

Josh was sitting in front of Remus, relentlessly wagging his tail so Remus tossed the ball, allowing Josh to quickly grab it and bring it back to Remus, following him as he walked out to Natalie.

"Hey, Nat," Remus said, leaning against the tree next to her and taking the ball and tossing it again.

"Hey. Sorry if I stole your thunder at dinner last night," Natalie said with a smirk.

"Nah. I'm glad you said it. Though you could've told me ahead of time," Remus said and Natalie chuckled.

Josh brought the ball back and dropped it in front of Remus, forcing him to bend over and pick it back up.

"I don't know. It's hard, isn't it? Even when you know someone will accept you. Just… saying the words. I'd rather just people know and accept it without having to make a big fuss," Natalie said.

"Yeah. Unfortunately, life is more complicated than that."

"Yeah."

Josh barked at Remus, his eyes fixed on the ball. Remus laughed and tossed the ball far, watching the dog rush to retrieve it.

"Say, Nat… do you know… Last night, when I went up to talk to mom.. She… kind of revealed that she's been in love with this lady for the last twenty-five years?"

"What?" Natalie said, stopping her swinging and staring at Remus in confusion.

"Last night… she just… out of nowhere revealed that she cheated on dad with this lady when she was twenty-one," Remus said, whispering as if their mother could somehow hear them out there.

"The fuck?" Natalie gasped.

"Right?"

Josh barked, having dropped the ball in front of Remus at some point. Remus shook his head and tossed the ball again.

"Who is this lady? Does she still know her?"

"Yeah. She lives here in Keene. She didn't say who she was but she's a lesbian and has wife or girlfriend or whatever," Remus replied.

"How could she judge us?" Natalie asked.

"I don't know. I've been wondering the same thing. I guess she compartmentalizes. She's probably in denial about her feelings. I mean at first she just told me she had kissed a girl like it was no big deal… then it was clear… that she had really liked her… and she spent the night with her," Remus said.

"Wait. Mom boned a lady and judges us?" Natalie said, sounding pissed.

"I guess so. I didn't ask for details but… the implication was there," Remus said.

"What a fucking hypocrite," Natalie said.

"I don't know. I feel bad for her. She didn't grow up in the same time we are, Nat. Her parents were really religious and she was dating dad. Think about how hard it is to come out now and imagine what it was like in 1980," Remus said.

"Yeah, but still. How dare she judge us," Natalie growled.

"I want to help her," Remus said.

"What? Convince her she's gay or bi?" Natalie said.

"I don't know. I just know that if it were me I would want help," Remus said.

Josh barked and Remus tossed the ball. Remus sometimes wondered what the dog got out of this process. If someone kept tossing a ball and forcing him to go and fetch it, he'd think they were a real jerk.

"What if we help her and she's like oh, I guess I'm a lesbian and leaves dad?" Natalie said.

Remus frowned. He hadn't thought of that.

"I don't know. But what if she's unhappy? What if she doesn't want to deny who she is for the rest of her life?" Remus said.

"God, you've always been such a valiant hero. Fine. We'll talk about this. But I need to get stoned. Will you come out into the woods and smoke some weed with me?"

Natalie knew that Remus didn't care for weed but under the circumstances he felt like it might help.

"I'll put Josh up," Remus said.

"I'll go get the stuff from my room," Natalie said, jumped out of the tire swing.

"I wanted to make video games but I've moved on from that. I still play them but I've moved onto more serious programming endeavors," Severus said.

James really didn't like this guy. James hated the way he looked down on everyone and everything. He was waiting for any sign of mistreatment for Charity but in truth he seemed to look at her with a lot of love and she seemed to like him. He wasn't doing anything to anybody. He was just kind of a pretentious asshole.

From what James gathered the two of them had met on OkCupid. For some reason or the other that seemed sort of vague, he had been thinking of moving to Southwest Oregon and chatted up Charity. They hit it off and now here she was, all moved right near where Lily grew up and about to marry this jerk. Something about this was weird.

James pulled out his phone, not caring if he was being rude and thinking that Severus was too busy listening to himself talk as he sent Lily a text:

This guy is an ass. Also his story is weird.

"Yeah," James chuckled, pretending to have heard whatever Severus had just said.

His phone chimed.

That sucks. What's his name? Maybe I know him lol

Yeah, his name is weird too. Severus Snape. Who names their kid Severus?

"What the fuck?" Lily said suddenly, making Sirius jump.

"What?" Mary said.

Lily looked up from with a look bordering on horror. They were walking along Ashuelot Rail Trail and Sirius had been greatly enjoying the environment, suddenly very much looking forward to the upcoming two weeks spent in a cabin.

Lily turned to Mary looking grim.

"James's ex-girlfriend is marrying Severus Snape," Lily said.

"Oh my god," Mary said looking shocked.

"Who is that?" Sirius asked.

"I've mentioned a friend who I slept with then he turned into an asshole because I wouldn't drop everything and be with him? This is the guy," Lily said, shaking her phone as if it were him.

She texted back to James as she made frustrated grunts.

"Ugh. I can't believe I agreed to go to his wedding," Lily said.

"Weren't we planning on crashing it anyhow?" Mary said.

"Probably. But now it's an obligation. That fucker… I bet he knows. Let me ask James how the fuck these two met," Lily said, pulling her phone back out of her shorts pocket and furiously texting.

After a short back and forth Lily was fuming.

"They met on OKC. He was looking up people where we live, Sirius. He knew exactly what he was doing. He's probably been Facebook stalking me or, God, I don't even know. He might be following my Tumblr," Lily said, making a disgusted face.

"Holy fuck, Lil. You think he's stalking you," Mary said.

"I don't know. I hope not. Maybe he was just curious and he really did like her profile. I hope so. I mean… they are living out here. Maybe it started that way but… he really likes her?" Lily said.

"Babe, I think you might want to consider meeting with Sev. Bury the hatchet," Mary said.

"Yeah. In his fucking back. I gave him a chance. I was ready to forgive him if he just would've owned up. I don't know that I can go back, even if he has grown. Fuck!" Lily said, looking like she needed to sit down.

They were nearly at a bridge and carried on to there where they rested and look out at the river that passed beneath it.

"Just when I thought I had everything figured out. Boom," Lily said, making an explosive gesture with her hands.

"That's life, I guess," Mary said, wrapping an arm around her shoulders and planting a kiss on her cheek.

"Guess so," Lily said and frowned.

"What does James think of him?" Sirius asked.

"James thinks he's an ass," Lily said, grinning slightly.

"He's not wrong," Mary admitted and they all chuckled.

"There's more about me… than just being bi," Remus said, exhaling marijuana smoke into the air as he lay next to his sister in a bright outcropping in the woods.

"Oh yeah?" Natalie asked, taking a puff from her joint.

The world felt odd. Being stoned was such an unusual feeling. It felt nice but Remus wouldn't want to feel this way very often. He felt oddly detached from his own experiences, like he was looking through a window into another reality. He didn't know what the fuck that meant but it was definitely how he felt.

"I might be nonbinary," Remus admitted.

"Cool. I have a friend who is genderfluid. They're pretty rad," Natalie said.

"Nice. I don't know. Gender is weird. Like… what does it even mean?" Remus said.

"I don't fuckin' know. I'm a girl but I don't know what that means," Natalie said.

Remus puffed on his joint again then slowly exhaled, feeling another gently burn of euphoria in his mind.

"I wore a skirt and makeup at Pride and it felt so right. But I'm afraid if I really were to look like what I feel… someone might hurt me," Remus admitted.

"Don't worry, big brother, if anyone hurts you I'll beat them up," Natalie declared, pumping a fist then puffing on her joint.

"Thanks. I appreciate that, Nat. But yeah it's… I just… had never felt more myself before that weekend before. And I didn't even know until I tried to let myself be that person," Remus said, thinking if he weren't so high he would probably be crying.

"Aww. That's great," Natalie said, rubbing his shoulder.

"Of course, I can't even begin to approach telling them about my gender," Remus said, meaning their parents.

"Yeah, I get that. Right. We were gonna talk about mom. What should we do?" Natalie said.

"I don't know. I think if we press her on it she'll just get defensive, maybe even deny it. If we knew who the lady was we could talk to her… Maybe you were right. We shouldn't meddle," Remus said, inhaling marijuana smoke again.

"Probably. I don't know. I think you sold me on it. I was thinking what if I stayed in the closet and got married to some dude and could… never be honest? That would suck," Natalie said.

"Yeah. Maybe you should talk to her. Wait until there's a good moment. You can take her aside and tell her your experiences. Get her to relate, maybe," Remus said.

"Yeah. Maybe. Maybe so. Good idea, big brother," Natalie said.

Sirius was napping when Remus returned to the hotel that evening. He had arrived back a couple of hours before from their walk partially down the rail trail then back up again and taken a shower then laid down with nothing better to do.

"Hey," Sirius said, rubbing his eyes.

"Hey," Remus said with a grin and rushed over to Sirius's bed as soon as he had set his backpack down.

He slid over to Sirius and their lips quickly met for a slow, sweet kiss.

"Mmm. I missed you too," Sirius said.

"Where's Peter?" Remus asked.

"Hanging out with Dorcas. They hit it off," Sirius said.

"Cool," Remus said and kissed Sirius again, a hand sliding down the side of his body to his hip.

They slowly made out, Sirius enraptured by the feel of Remus's lips. He reached behind Remus and slid his hands up and down his back, feeling aroused by his weight and heat. He had more muscle and form than he often acted like he had.

Sirius pulled his mouth away to breathe, brushing his face against Remus's before their lips slid back together as if that was how they belonged. Sirius was grateful they were alone and they didn't have to hold anything back, though he wasn't sure where this was going.

Remus pulled away and said, "I've got so much I need to tell. Stuff we should talk about too."

"Oh? You don't want to keep doing this," Sirius said, gesturing from his own lips to Remus's.

"Yeah. I mean, after," Remus said leaning back into Sirius's mouth.

Remus seemed to slide closer and closer and Sirius could feel something hard below pressing against his thigh. He was certain that he was wet.

"Remus… if you wanted to do something right now… I would definitely be game for that," Sirius admitted.

Remus frowned then kissed Sirius before pulling away again.

"We need to talk before we get carried away. I want to… Physically I really want to," Remus said, lightly rocking his pelvis.

"Yeah, me too. Badly, but that's OK. Umm… say what you need," Sirius said and Remus slid away.

"I guess… I wanted to talk about us and what we want from this relationship," Remus said.

"Well, what do you want?" Sirius asked.

"Umm… God, I'm nervous," Remus admitted with a chuckle.

Sirius was a little too turned on to be nervous but chuckled with Remus anyway.

"Don't be. Just say whatever. No judging," Sirius promised.

"OK. I mean… I love you. I never thought I would be able to say that to anyone with such ease but it's true. I know I haven't known you a long time but… I love you," Remus said.

"I love you too," Sirius grinned, wanting to kiss him but knowing that way might lead them down the path Remus didn't want to go.

"Lily always says that relationships should be based on mutual want and need," Remus said.

"Well, what do you want and need?" Sirius said.

"I want… you. All of you that you are willing to share. Need? I don't think I need you but I need… so much. There's so much love and affection in me. Maybe more than I could ever give one person?" Remus said.

"Oh," Sirius said with realization.

"Yeah. I guess… I'm worried that I might want to be with other people and that… either you wouldn't be OK with it or you would think it was because I didn't love you enough…" Remus said.

"Don't you think this has occurred to me?" Sirius said.

"Has it?"

"Yeah. Lily has had me thinking. I mean… you're the only person I've ever seriously been romantically attracted to. I mean… I don't even know what that means? What is romantic attraction? How is it different than anything else? If I think about wanting to kiss Lily is that romantic attraction or do I just think it would be fun? Friends can kiss. Romantic partners can kiss. I'm not sure what the difference is," Sirius said.

"Me either. I guess it's different for everybody? There's this thing… called relationship anarchy. It's a totally different way of looking at relationships in a non-hierarchical fashion. I think it's cool," Remus said.

"I'll have to look that up. Anyhow, to answer your underlying question: I'm cool if you want to date other people. As long as it's cool that I do too," Sirius said.

Sirius did have some interest in Lily. He wasn't sure what the attraction was but it existed. It could be fun to explore that.

"Of course. Though I do wonder… what if the person I was interested in was… someone we knew?" Remus said.

"That sounds better than strangers," Sirius said and Remus grinned.

"I'm not sure I'm ready to talk about that but… I might have a crush on someone," Remus said.

It wouldn't be shocking that Remus was interested in Lily, seeing as she was his best friend, and Sirius wasn't sure why Remus would want to treat it like a secret but he also wasn't going to press him on the issue.

"That's fair. Was there anything else you wanted to talk about?" Sirius said.

"Yeah… my mom. She… Told me something last night and I wanted to get your take on it. Then maybe we can watch some Netflix until we fall asleep?"

"Definitely," Sirius said and listened to the perplexing revelations about Remus's mother.