Lauren
A/N: I'm not crazy about this one, but it's longer. It is also dedicated to MEBdaPenguin , Jo, Maddy , Love's Daughter , who very kindly reviewed this, btw if I haven't responded personally yet I will be soon :) I hope you enjoy and reviews inspire me! *hint hint*
It wasn't really self harm.
She didn't cut, and she most certainly never bled.
It barely even hurt. It was uncomfortable but not really painful.
She uses her dad's lighter.
Says she's lighting candles.
Heating up the pointed end of a metal comb,
She can't help but smile.
It only takes a few minutes to get prepared,
enough time to consider and re-consider what she's doing.
To think about if she really wants this.
It makes her wish the lighter was hotter and the comb would heat up quicker.
Pressing the heated tip to her thigh,
she lets a shaky breath leave her mouth.
Writhing the slurs on her makes them less painful.
She writes the first letter on her; F
She remembers Lee Cummin's, a transfer student, had mumbled to Karofsky asking who the fat girl was. He couldn't walk right for two weeks after that.
Anybody who had any sense wouldn't say anything about her, atleast not to her face.
Pressing it down again she moves to the next, A
She thinks of all the skinny girl's in her class who had made her feel like crap just by being there.
Her hand becomes shaky while she writes the last, T
She hears her mother telling her that she needs to lose weight.
Once she's done she places the comb on her desk and covers her leg again.
She doesn't need to look at it again, she knows it there.
Etched in her skin,
blistering and scabbing over.
She tells herself she won't do it again,
She knows she's lying again.
It wasn't really self harm.
She didn't cut, and she most certainly never bled.
It barely even hurt. It was uncomfortable but not really painful.