Chapter 4: Avoidance

Over the next few weeks, Lily avoided Teddy like the plague. She just didn't know how to approach him. At the end of every class period, Teddy tried to ask Lily to stay, but Lily was out of there quicker than a snitch.

It's not that Lily wanted to give Ted the cold shoulder. In all honesty, she missed her best mate more than anything. She just didn't know if she could handle the rejection that was sure to come from her now sober friend's mouth.

All Lily could do was think about the amazing and Earth-shattering kiss she and Teddy shared. She replayed it over and over in her head every single night before bed. It wasn't long before the dreams began to occur. Well, Lily thought, it was more like dreams that turned into nightmares.

Each one was the same. One moment, Lily would be kissing Ted, completely happy and lost in his embrace, and the next, Victoire would begin screaming Unforgivable Curses at her. It was enough to make her wake up in chills every night.

But even the nightmares couldn't stop Lily from reliving that kiss every chance she had. Sometimes, she even let her mind wander during lessons. She enjoyed getting lost in her happy little bubble, kissing Teddy passionately, and sometimes that passion lead to more things…

"Miss Potter." Lily felt herself being dragged from her bubble, feeling it about to pop. "MISS POTTER!" Lily jumped in surprise and nearly fell from her chair. She looked up to meet Teddy's gaze, and felt her cheeks reddening at the steamy thoughts her mind wandered to about the man in front of her.

"Well thank you for finally gracing us with your attention, Miss Potter. I will need to speak with you after class," Ted stated authoritatively before resuming his lesson.

Lily began to protest at once. "But Te-, I mean, Professor Lupin, I can't stay after class today, I-have to, um…" "I don't care what you have planned. You will stay behind or it will be 50 points from Gryffindor." All her fellow Gryffindors started to groan and snap at her to just shut it.

"But Professor," Lily tried again. "Not another word, Miss Potter. My office, after class. And I suggest you pay attention rather than doze off during my lesson." Teddy spoke with finality. Lily cursed herself. In all the classes, she chose to daydream in the class of the man whom she was daydreaming about. Nice going, Lily, she thought.

After what felt like the shortest lesson in all history, Teddy dismissed the other students. "Not you, Miss Potter. Don't think I can't see you backing away. My office. Now." Teddy paused. "Unless you want to damage Gryffindor's shot at the House Cup?"

Slytherin students sneered as they passed her. No doubt thinking the "teacher's pet" was finally getting what was coming to her. Little did they know, it was for a completely different reason. Lily rolled her eyes and made her way up to Teddy's office.

Once all the students had filed out of the class, Teddy followed Lily into his office and closed the door. Lily heard him mutter the muffliato curse before turning to face her. "Lil, we need to talk about the other night," Teddy began, his harsh tone earlier completely disappeared.

Lily refused to meet his gaze. "No, Ted, I don't think we do," Lily said defiantly. "Lil, listen..." Teddy tried to speak, but Lily cut him off. "Ted, honestly, you were pretty pissed that night. I wouldn't be surprised if you imagined many different things happening that didn't take place at all, like, um, for instance," Lily tried to come up with something, anything that could help her avoid this conversation.

"Like us snogging?" Ted interjected, with half smile. Before Lily could interject, Ted continued, "Lil, I admit I had a few fire whiskeys, but I wasn't that far gone. It happened. There's no point in pretending it didn't."

"Why not? I'm perfectly fine with pretending it never happened." Lily tried to sound as unaffected as possible, even though her heart could never pretend that kiss wasn't the best kiss of her life.

Lily chanced a look at Teddy's face. She thought for a split second that she saw hurt cross Teddy's eyes, but it was gone so fast, she believed she had imagined it. Teddy took a deep breath. "But it did happen, Lil. And because of it, you've been avoiding me. You're my best mate. I don't want to lose our friendship over this."

Lily's eyes began to water. Friendship. That's all she would be to Ted; a friend, a kid, someone who is so inferior to people like Victoire, whose very presence demands adoration the moment she walks into a room. Lily was dumb to believe that someone like Teddy Lupin could ever have real feelings for her. Not when he had someone like her cousin.

"Lily, please don't be upset. I'm not saying our friendship is over. I just want us to fix this so we can go back to being us again." This made Lily want to burst into tears even more. Teddy didn't understand. She wasn't upset because she thought their friendship was over. She was upset because all there would ever be between them was friendship.

But honestly, what did Lily actually expect? That he would profess his undying love for her, sweep her off her feet, and live happily ever after? C'mon, Lil, don't be daft, Lily thought to herself.

"Look, we were both caught up in the moment, and I had been drinking. It's easy to make poor decisions in moments like that," Ted began to explain. Lily's heart broke. "Yeah," was all Lily could muster to say.

"Not saying that it wasn't a satisfactory kiss," Ted fumbled nervously, "but we both know how inappropriate it was, and we can't let something like that ever happen again…" Satisfactory kiss? More like a mind-blowing, Earth-shattering, heart-wrenching kiss. At least that's how Lily felt it to be. She came to conclusion that Teddy didn't share in those same sentiments.

Although Lily's heart was shattered into a million pieces, she knew she couldn't live without Ted as her best friend. So, she summoned up the courage to say her next few words. She knew she needed to get out of there fast before she broke down completely.

"Listen, Teddy, it's like you said. We were caught up in the moment and you were drunk. It meant nothing to either of us. So, let's just forget about that night and go back to being best mates, okay?" Lily thought she saw a flicker of hurt in Ted's eyes, again, but it disappeared faster than the fire whiskey bottles last night.

"Of course, I would like nothing more than that," Ted answered, looking at Lily with stormy grey eyes. Lily had never seen them this color before. He looked so troubled, yet so gorgeous. Lily had to stop herself from jumping up and kissing him again.

She took a deep breath, and mustering up as much strength as she possibly could, said, "Great. I'll see you tomorrow at our usual spot. No more avoiding, on either of our parts."

"Deal," Ted said.

"Good." And with that, Lily gave her best mate a small smile, left his office, and managed to make it to her four-poster bed before completely breaking down.