I suppose the masters of the universe are spiteful, vindictive creatures who delight in petty torments, drawing out their methods of torture until humanity gives in and becomes as vile as they once predicted. What a self-fulfilling prophecy. They must enjoy my various struggles and undertakings—those vicious, puerile hounds of hell.
After all, has my future been writ by the archaic hand of Hades? Is the Underworld to be my only consolation? If so, do the gods think I will cripple and fall under the weight of this heavy burden? Do they think they can break me with such fickle torments? I will rise again, time after time, breaking through the waves, for my empire is one of thorns and vice and not for all of heaven will I relinquish my hold on it. Do you suppose that my heart will soften at the sight of a dead orphan or innocent victim? Well let me tell you—there is no such thing as innocence in this world. Everyone grows up one day and they will either become the hangman or the slaughtered, there is no alternative. I should rather hold the knife than be guillotined and come what may, I will kill a thousand legions to bring you home.
Even if you are a silly, lost child, sitting in perfect ignorance, oblivious of my troubles. Lizzy, you sweet, precious thing—you are so unaware of the darkness of this world, aren't you? So insulated and safe in your splendid white castle with your rose vines and idle youth. You do not know that this world is a feast of hunger, of man cannibalizing man in an attempt to elevate themselves above the fray.
Have you ever seen the blood soaked streets? Filth and lechery a perfect match against the dark grey sky and cloistered, ramshackle buildings whose decrepit nature only reinforce the broken morality of man, who passes by glassy eyed and dumb, with poison in their blood while women fall on their backs and children with dirtied hands steal coins and shillings from the prostitute's skirts?
You were meant to be the antithesis to all this—my last vestige of light but no.
No.
You have gone too, haven't you? Providence has clawed you from my grip and you senseless, selfish darling—you've stolen away into the night because you can, isn't that right? Shall I attach chains and shackles to you next time? Imprison you in a tower like fair Rapunzel because you've always liked those insipid fairytales now isn't that right? How well would you love me then, if I was to be your guard and jailor? Would your light dim? Would your laughter cease?
Why have you put me in such a position?
How dare you. The sheer presumption in thinking—
I would rather see you shut away in a convent for all eternity than be kept from me, dangled like a morsel on a string. Does Bravat think I'll capitulate? That I'll give in simply because he has you? I am not so weak willed as that. I care for nothing and no one—it is the only truth I will hold onto and damn it all, the abyss is all I have left because everyone has gone. The failure of my predecessor, the weakness of Madam Red, the disappearance of youth and beauty and—are you afraid, Lizzy?
Of course you're not, my sweet, simple cousin. How happy you are. I have kept you from everything, so you remain unaware. I have burned and slaughtered and killed for me. Children and orphaned angels who try to do good...do you suppose I gave any consideration to their humble, pathetic lives? I want to laugh and scream because you don't know. You don't know how I would gladly sacrifice all those who stand in my way so that I may exact my pound of flesh.
So remain there—stay where you are and rot among the dead and decaying corpses of those who have fallen under Bravat's spell. Stay there, you imprudent little girl and see what I care.
Run away and be done with it—do you suppose you're the only one with a capricious memory, capable of turning hearts and moonlighting in foolish frivolity? Let me break your heart and see how your smile shatters.
- Lyssa: Greek goddess of anger, rage, and frenzy.
A/N: Stage two—anger. (Yes, I'm modeling these chapters on the five stages of grief so that's why Ciel sounds like a sneering, cruel shadow of Sebastian.) Also this is Ciel's perception of Lizzy, one that's obviously flawed and clouded by his anger, frustration, and worry due to her absence.
Reviews appreciated :)